A DRAG QUEEN KNIGHTED ME TODAY

Fuck the Homecoming Court. I propose a new idea: the Homecoming Coup.

Voting for the Homecoming King/Queen/Sovereign or whatever works as normal. However, at any point between when the results are announced and when Homecoming begins, anyone can declare war on the monarch. Both sides are then allowed to form alliances, creating the Rebels and the Royal Guard, respectively. They may strategize as they wish during this grace period.

When Homecoming begins, the Rebel Leader and the Monarch step inside a circle in the center of the gym. They both receive melee weapons and the objective to beat the other out of the circle. The Rebels and the Royal Guard fight outside of the duel-circle, but are not allowed to attack the Rebel Leader or the Monarch until the opposing team has been defeated.

The last one standing in the circle wins. Members of the winning team are promoted to the Court, and the team leader becomes the Monarch.

A few key points:

Murder is allowed.

Betrayal is encouraged.

You can forfeit but I think you're boring.

The principal must sit on the balcony and preside over the duel like a Roman Emperor.

This will drastically alter the high school hierarchy and provide boundless entertainment during exam season.

For once, Homecoming will not be ruled by the popular, but by the formidable and sanguinary. Just as the gods intended.

Just to let y'all know

the keebler elf is real & he fucks

PARTAKE IN THE WHAT

"I cant draw" then do it bad who gives a fuck.....

Tell me

Does the silly jingler enjoy pumpkin pie and a nice cup of apple cider?

pumpkin pie is decent but a nice cup of apple cider would have this silly jingler janglin' his jingle bells for a drop of that sweet nectar

shoving a head of iceberg lettuce down my throat to distract myself from the divine horror of creation

eating a salad (anxiously)

hooooooly moly that went way better than I thought it would

a bit scuffed but the crowd was nonetheless entertained

bruh one of the actors in a show I'm in just rage quit last night and I'm taking 3 of his parts

we open THIS THURSDAY

get off my property

i hate this stupid fucking koala so much i hate him it makes me physically ill looking at his stupid face i wish jimmy actually threw him off the fucking building bc he sucks so fucking much i hate him i hate him i hate him i ha

I'm thinking about the immortal jellyfish.

hot tip: when your anniversary comes up please do not use the #tumblr milestone tag or whatever- I got bombarded with icky bots when I did

Will do, captain. Thank you for your sacrifice. 🫡

can we see cousin jongle?

I gotchu bro