DATE: 9-3-25

16 days of productivity starts now.....I know I can do it. Just prove it to yourself that you can do it

Who the fuck are you? I literally eat so freaking less like you always complain to me and the everyone. So if once in a while I ask you to make something else for me and it's not difficult at all it's easy and simple. You remind of the fact that I don't get good grades . You fucking bitch if I knew I needed good grades to eat food you should have told me . You freaking psycho. I hate you and the only reason I'll study is to go away from you. I am not happy with you as parent and honestly I do wish someone else someone with a better mindset to be my parent.....I suppose my dad makes up for it ....I respect him but never you........never you because everything you have done just makes me hate you even more. It's always you who always makes me cry and honestly if you think that your only threat which is papa ko bta dungi then theek hai bitch bta do.....I respect him but honestly at this I get scolded by you so much that it has made me numb yo it toh theek kha lungi mai unseen nhi daant tujhse toh vaise bhi kya hi rho hoon. Aur teri awaaj I freaking the fucking tone you always speak in. If you can never understand me then atleast dont fuck up my mental peace and mindset by your fucking stupid and "dump" views.

I started out this academic session with lot of determination but it all faded because of distractions so I am hoping to focus on discipline .......and tbh I would give this credit to my new friend who is so smart( and sweet also) but like very smart....looking at her...she inspires me to start studying and be smart as well....so thank you new friend for rekindling my flame of wanting to be an academic weapon.

And ofc I'll keep you all updated :)

I have always seen videos and blogs and numerous articles telling you how you can achieve your best self with highest potential. And many people want to achieve their highest potential....many people work towards it but I've never heard people saying that they want to be their favourite self. Where they achieve their true goals something they truly wanted to do since childhood . Something that just makes them happy instead of joining the rat race and seeing where they want to make more money and just become whatever they want to be as a kid . I know this sounds so naive and tbh this is naive but rn I wish that I become successful so that my little brother could depend on me and without any fear of expectation from other . I wish he could pursue his childhood dream because whenever I see his passion and the pretty smile on his face when he talks about it I just want to make sure that no matter what happens he is able to acheive his childhood dream. I don't have a passion and yes I'm going to run after money but I want to do it for him so that instead of joining the rat race he can fulfill his passion and become his favourite self.

Just a reminder to all the people self sabotaging themselves

Growing up is actually all about realizing people don’t inherently dislike you and it’s a bit odd to assume they do

DATE : 13-3-25

Aim: IIT Bombay,CS

5/100 So I didn't post anything for the last two days cuz I was exhausted. But anyways yesterday was my last exam and yesterday I also went to my coaching so it was a hectic day. Now even though my school exams are over, I still have my coaching's reshuffling test to worry about and I really need to study properly or else I'll remain behind. I have 11 more days. and it's not even full uninterrupted 11days, no, Holi is day after tomorrow. I have school and coaching both in between and and I have just started with the syllabus, I have to cover everything from scratch cuz I wasted most of my 11th but it changes now. Anyways enough of my ramblings. hours studied on ypt today:

I try to be the person with low requirements cuz I genuinely feel that's my only plus point but it's sad when you realise your "friends" take advantage of it

I do this thing where I want to talk to someone but i don't know what to say or how to start the talk......It's not anxiety or shyness or overthinking.....It's just lack of content in my case

Be scared and do it anyway. Be unqualified and get in the room anyway. Be messy, imperfect and unsure and still show up anyway. Comfort is the enemy of growth. Get uncomfortable

Dude you were too harsh with your callout😭😭

Look at you. Browsing the same four apps over and over again looking to find your parents' love that you never got, from strangers' validation.