MC: So You Wanna Head To My Room?

Clone!Shep: Shoot them, I’m the real Shepard!

Shepard: The only way to know for sure is to shoot us both!

Kaidan, pointing his gun at the clone: The real Shepard would never pass up an opportunity to unnecessarily sacrifice themselves!

Wait a minute...

Childe: i just killed your entire family for not paying the fatui back

Some Random Person: what..? i live alone?

Childe: what?

Childe: then who were the people in your house?

Some Random Person: there’s people in my house???

Childe: well not anymore

Paimon: could you be any more annoying

Venti: easily

Jean: you have the right to remain silent

Venti: but do i have the ability?

MC: when i asked you to bring me something back from the beach, i meant like a conch shell

Mammon, struggling to hold a seagull: well you didn’t fucking say that

PONDERING MY ORB

Diluc: y’all still beat your meat lol

Kaeya: well what do you beat?

Diluc: evildoers

Percy: Are you the little spoon or the big spoon?

Nico: I’m a knife.

Will: He’s the little spoon.

Childe: do you know how many bones the human body has? its 206. we start with 369 when we’re babies but they fuse. wouldn’t you want to go back? have as many bones as a baby? what if i could help you

The Traveler: hi yeah what the actual, literal, genuine FUCK does this mean