Paimon: Could You Be Any More Annoying

Childe: YEAH SONNNNNNN

Zhongli: daddy

Childe: what the fuck

Zhongli: you called me son and i panicked

C-Sec Officer: You’re under arrest.

Grunt: Wait till my father hears about this.

Xingqiu: dude

Chongyun: im busy rn

Chongyun: i ate glass by accident

Xingqiu: you what

Chongyun: please leave me alone

Chongyun: i ate glass

Itto: bro she’s online

Itto: what do i do??

Heizou: send nudes

Itto: u first

Heizou: ?

Heizou: send it to HER

Itto: oh my bad

I am a ladybug stan first and a human second

-both alya and adrien

Random Treasure Horder: please don’t kill me

Kaeya: i can bring you in warm or i could bring you in cold. start talking

Klee: *desperately trying to hand one of them a wet cheerio*

Leviathan: just found out that people eat fish, what the actual fuck, what the fuck you guys

Leviathan: actually on second thought that’s kinda hot

Satan: please give it a third thought

Venti: i’d rather encounter multiple women who take astrology too seriously over even one man who genuinely believes in the sigma/alpha/beta male bullshit

Mona: gemini

Venti: never mind, the women are fucking witches there’s no way she could’ve known that

Asmodeus: your hair doesn’t go with your outfit. you look kind of halloween-y

Mammon: the fuck is up your ass today?

Asmodeus: a worm. just to make me lose a few pounds

Childe: i’m about to go fight scaramouche i’ll post the vid later

Childe: nvm i got my ass beat i’m not posting that shit