What I Ate Today… Yes It’s A Lot, But No Binge And I Counted All The Calories.

grief is so crazy like what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. does she know i loved her. i miss her so much. i catch myself doing things she used to do. i wish i could call her. i miss her so much. i do a crossword puzzle. i cry while washing the dishes. does she know i loved her? my heart feels like a hummingbird. i miss her so much. what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. what if i forget.

*Mutual reblogs something you posted*

Me: They still like me. Thank God.

your disorder is still valid if you:

- aren’t uw

- don’t fast

- do high res

- have never fainted

- labs are okay

- like food

- binge / “lose control”

- don’t exercise

- don’t purge

- eat sweets / junk

if your thoughts and behaviours around food cause you significant distress, you have an ed.

Whenever my boyfriend jokes about like being the best or anything like positive. I just go with it. Like heck, yeah, you’re the best! There is nobody better than you. I love him so much.

Me on tumblr.

Did a Pilates class this morning and I sweat like a fucking pig, I feel disgusting. But at least all my muscles burn now. I hope the fat burns away with it.

Reminder for anyone who might see this;

You don’t need a psychiatric diagnosis to be not well. The DSM-IV or the ICD-10 is literally just a checklist of symptoms and if you have enough of them you get the diagnosis (plus some gut feeling and expertise of whoever is diagnosing you).

But nothing changes. Your experiences as they are right now- are valid.

I (personally) am against self-diagnosis… because I’ve seen people get it super wrong. But if that works for you; great!

Instead of googling symptoms, google what you can do. Google treatment options, take-home therapy homework, journal, talk to your friends, connect with people, go for free counselling, move your body in ways that feel good.

Especially if you have an 3d… I’m sorry but you are betraying your body. You are ignoring hunger cues, you are ignoring your own needs. That has an effect on your mental health, your body remembers.

Chew and spit is my new fave thing…. I still count like some calories for it

But I get to taste things without eating it? Perfect

What I ate yesterday~

(+ some dried seaweed I forgot to picture)

Snacks: green grapes, cherry tomatoes, salad, and soybeans; I weighed everything. (328cal)

Dinner: Beef with pasta and sauce, and a slice of chocolate cake (~700cal)

Snack: seaweed (~90cal)

Total: 1118cal

I binged and now I’m crying in bed