Sometimes When Dicks Just Too Tired To Deal With The Batfam’s Shit He Starts Encouraging Them.

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no tumblr this doesnt need tags im releasing it into the wild as god intended

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Please, just respect the fact that I have said this.

exactly what you think it means

Cat logic

I didn't expect that at all 😺🤣

I love the concept of Danny just completely forgetting what normal people are supposed to be like, like at first he knows he's a bit fucked up and doesn't blend in, but as time goes on and amity ALSO becomes more fucked up, they all just kinda??? Forget

So you get situations like

Danny: taking a nap during class but he's floating

The rest of the class: damn wish I could sleep that well

-

Danny: drinking what is very clearly ectoplasm

The nasty burger waiter that came to take their order: you want a refill on that?

-

Danny *talking with Sam and tucked*: so when my parents shot me

Random stranger: your parents shot me too bestie, big mood

Ra’s: Who turned the Lazarus Pit purple?

Nyssa: Are those bath bombs?

Talia: *calmly sipping her tea*

Ra’s, to Talia: It’s one of your spawn again, I just know it.

Talia: I’ll have you know my children are both perfect angels.

Nyssa: *poorly concealed snort*

Meanwhile, back in Gotham:

Jason: I have to admit, I’m impressed.

Bruce: Jason, stop encouraging this.

Jason: What? I’m not encouraging it, I’m just saying it’s impressive.

Steph: Thanks. I just felt like I wasn’t contributing much to the annoy Ra’s effort.

Bruce: No, no effort. There is no effort.

Tim, walking into the Cave: Hey, anyone know why Ra’s texted me asking for an alibi?

Jason: It was Steph?

Tim: Seriously? That’s amazing! What’d you do?

Bruce: STOP ENCOURAGING THIS.

Tim: What? it’s just Ra’s. We annoy him all the time.

Bruce: *one more thread of mental sanity snapping in the background*

Bruce: I don’t want to know, but I feel compelled to, so by show of hands, who here routinely pokes a bear with a stick?

Jason: I’m telling Ra’s you called him that. *whips out his phone and begins texting*

Bruce: I did not… Not the point. Can you all just PLEASE stop antagonizing a supervillain?

Damian: Grayson said a little harmless teasing was a sort of bonding activity between family members.

Jason: Yeah, just letting gramps know we’re thinking about him.

Damian: And how we will one day dismantle his entire legacy.

Tim, cackling: I’m telling him you called him gramps. *begins texting*

Steph: Wow, and all I did was get some bath bombs in the Lazarus Pit.

Damian: My respect for you has increased, Brown.

Steph: Thanks, kid. Your mom helped.

Bruce: *pained sounds*

Later:

Talia: So what are your thoughts on Jason?

Steph: Yeah, he’s pretty cool.

Talia: Would you be willing to consider entering into a…

Jason: MOM! STOP TRYING TO SET ME UP!

Steph: Uh…

Talia, shrugging: It was worth a try.

stop resisting, narinder 🧐

Danny, after running away moving to Gotham a few months ago begins making little commentary videos on a social media app.

It was fine and all with mostly friends viewing them up until his meta gene activated. He didn't even know he had a meta gene and kinda figured any of the ghost stuff he did as Phantom would have activated it if he did have one. Nope!

His newest video started out with him wearing a red beanie, "Hey guys! You know how I just moved to Gotham a few months ago? Well, turns out I have the meta gene!" He takes a moment to let that sink in before continuing, "Most people get there abilities or whatever through a lab accident or an explosion or something and end up with like telekinesis."

"I, however, am hated by the universe and got scratched by a cat," he then yanked off the beanie to reveal two large cat ears, "and turned into furry bait. On that note if you have any tips on how to avoid Catwoman please leave them in the comments section. For my sake."

Dick stared down at his phone in shock. He needed to show his siblings this

In the meantime Danny has to deal with his channels popularity skyrocketing. "This is not what I want to be remembered for."

Bonus points if Danny gets one of those FMK questions that are all bats and he responds with, "Kill? A bat? Listen, if I get put into a death match with a bat the only one dying here will be me. I cant even do a backflip, what makes you think I could even touch one of them???"

semi-endgame jail conversation gave me whiplash! i don’t know what the royal family drama is but i need the entire story front to back thanks. gimme the tea or whatever the kids say ☕