Shame The User Is Anonymous! We'd Probably Become Friends If I Could Dm Them! 🕷️❤️😘😍🥰😌☺️😉😁✨👉🏻👈🏻

Exactly! And no other spider can ever replace me I hope!! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😉😏😋☺️🤭😁😌🥺🥹😳🙂💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

Would u like a pet cat or something more exotic? A spider perhaps?

I have a Spider already, thanks.

A cat might threaten it.

Challenge: name 5 things Trender Man likes and 5 things he dislikes.

Likes:

When he unintentionally matches his colors on his lazy days off. 😤

Being able to walk into a clothing store and try on clothes without looking sus.

His random ankle tat he got with his first boyfriend. Man his mom was so pissed lol. It's a tattoo of a peony.

Likes having Slender as an older brother. He can always get good advice from him regarding protection and isolation.

Having a family that supports his hobbies and sexuality. He thinks if he was in any other Slender house, he would have been murdered at 800 years old.

Dislikes:

NOT 👏🏼 HAVING 👏🏼 FACIAL 👏🏼 HAIR 👏🏼 he could do SO MUCH MORE if he had some >:(

Being lonely. He'd rather always be around people than have to live by himself. It feels so weird.

Having to live with the fact he didn't know how to tie a tie until he was 1300 years old. Feels like such a failure lmao.

Inequality. He will fight tooth and nail for the fashion industry to become more diverse. He's so tired of the models and he wants someone who can work a stage without attitude for once!

Also doesn't like his own skinny bod. Has tried to gain weight and gain muscle but because he's a slender it just doesn't affect him. It's so evil bro let him be Curvy Barbie ffs.

*Snorts* So he actually did indeed fall down the staircase and probably gave poor Mrs. Hudson a heart attack! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍✨😂🤣😌😁😉☺️💯👉🏻👈🏻

Does your broken butt fell better today, Sherly? 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍🥺🥹😭😳🥲😅☺️😉😁😌😂🤣👉🏻👈🏻

My posterior is not broken. The majority of it consists of muscles like the gluteus maximus, which you can't really break.

Concerning my bruised non-injured coccyx and sacrum, I might have palpated them when if I had fallen on them. And the theoretical palpation showed no broken or moving parts. No x-ray necessary given that a broken coccyx can't be treated with a cast anyway given you can't immobilise the bone properly.

But of course such a theoretical injury takes some days to heal and several impact points on legs and arms have bruises when you fall down the stairs. Hematoma usually take a few weeks to heal, as well as the pain to lessen. All theoretical, of course.

Hewwo! Any flies you'd like to get rid of? 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌🥳😋😉😁😇

Hey Harry, I'm back and I've missed talking to you! 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😉😁🥺🥹😭

oh Spidey! it's been a while...

welcome back?!?

Stingy flies! Yummy! Also I can't wait to keep learning from you how to deduce things! And thanks for the infos, they're not only needed but also moch appreciated! You really have no idea how much I've missed you, along with everyone else. The only thing left that I really miss is my old username, so yes, I do agree with you on the matter that the old username was better. 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😉😁🥺🥹😭😇😳😋🥳

Hey there Sherlock! I'm back! I hope you've been well and I hope you still keep up those awesome, braincell-revieving, scientific explainations about stuff like insects or arachnids like myself! 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😋🥳😉😁🥺🥹😳😭

I had noted your absence, and wondered where my second favourite arachnid had gone (the title of favourite arachnid still goes to @criminalisticonsultant, apologies). So your return is much appreciated. Welcome back, I had missed your questions and comments. But I will miss your old name, @shame-of-chimical. Reminiscent of better times. However, there have been some major changes during your absence. If you want to know more about it, I would advise you to read this post, some further information here, and if you have any more questions please direct them to my consulting assistant @veritassempervincit. But I do have some insects for you, as I have been bee watching last weekend.

Isn't entomomania the obsession with insects? Also, can I have some of the cake too? That looks so good! 🕷️❤️😘😍🥰😌😅☺️😉😁🥹🥺🤤🥳💯👉🏻👈🏻

Hi there, Mr. Holmes! What are your thoughts about arachnophilia and entomomania? *Leaves big chocolate cake for you*

Arachnophilia and entomomania? How thoroughly... intriguing. The love of spiders and the fear of insects. I suppose everyone needs a lexicon hobby.

Without proper context, I'm afraid I don't have any interesting thoughts on them.

As for the cake, your offering is duly noted. I trust it is dark chocolate?

Do you have any headcannons for slender?

Sure do~

Slenderman Headcanons: 

He should be considered a mafia boss with the number of people working for him.

But he's more accurately like a father with a bunch of children he hires to do work.

He's in charge of the entirety of the manor. What jobs are coming in, who does them, financial stability, electricity, water, medical needs, house repairs, etc.

In the Underworld, the mansion would be considered a business, and Slenderman is the CEO of said business. He recruits all of the residents in the mansion and they then form a sort of contract with him. This gives them immortality for the duration of the contract, grants them disguises when in the human world for reasons other than work, and it grants them room and board at the mansion.

He can project his voice outside normally, although if he needs to have a private conversation with someone he can do it inside their mind. He tries not to do this too often as he views it as an invasion of privacy.

He tries to maintain a personal level with all the residents of the mansion to make sure relationships amongst them are going well and nobody is getting too depressed, too dangerous, too angry. He likes to look out for them.

He thoroughly enjoys reading as his favorite hobby. In the mansion he has a huge library in the center of it that's several stories and has just about every book you can think of. He collects medical ones sometimes for EJ, some manga for BEN, or some YA novels for the younger creeps. One time Jane and Natalie got him into a few different YA romance novels and even though it wasn't his normal taste he got pretty into them and they talked about them over tea. This sparked a weekly book club that any of the residents can partake in.

He's also quite fond of poetry, and he even writes his own. He has that stored in the library as well although it's in a hidden section only a few people can access.

King of the kitchen. He can make just about any dish you could think to want. Being alive for so long grants you lots of time to experiment and try different foods. 

Loves gardening and has a huge garden that circles the entirety of the mansion. He takes an extreme amount of pride in it and thinks any residence isn't complete without some flowers. He is very protective of it and only allows a select few to manage it, Toby is one of them as it puts him to work and he too values flowers and nature.

The way the crocodile gives that criminal offensive side-eye, as if daring to copy it and see what happens! 😂🤣

S-...so splendor has a praise kink right? So do you think his other brothers would have fav kinks & maybe a fav s3x position(s) to?😳

🏃💨

Of course they do! Putting this one under a cut.

C.W. Descriptions of sex. Minors DNI

Slenderman Headcanons: Sex & The Slender Brothers

Note: I also recommend reading the post: Slenderman Headcanon: Lovemaking 

Slenderman

Slender loves using his tendrils during sex. While you can expect gentle exploration, teasing and even some penetration with his tendrils, his favorite use for them is for bondage purposes. Nothing too crazy, but he especially likes holding his partners up with his tendrils as well as using the extra appendages to bind their hands or stuff their mouths.  

I don’t think Slender is aware of it himself but he has a thing for having sex while standing. Standing over someone as he rails them just does it for him and gives him a comforting sense of control. He can do the ‘horizontal tango’ but only with someone he trusts and when he’s feeling particularly intimate.  

Small amounts of pain during sex is also something he enjoys. Small nicks and scrapes from sharper teeth get him worked up and if he hasn’t bound your hands and trusts you enough then the feeling of claws scraping against his skin is lovely. 

Offenderman

Are you really going to do this to him? Make him pick a favorite kink and sex position? It’s like asking a parent their favorite child or a drowning man his favorite flavor of air. 

All sex is good sex.

Well, all sex is good sex so long as you’re not pounding him in the ass. He’s tried it (a lot) and unfortunately it just doesn’t do it for him. 

Trenderman

He wants to be all up in your business. No matter if he’s topping or bottoming, he wants to be in a position where he can feel as much of his partner as possible. 

Whether this means chest-to-chest, chest-to-back or anything else, he wants to be absolutely crushed against his partner.  

He wants to be doted on in his sexual encounters and this includes receiving extensive foreplay. He’s still very touchy during foreplay, whether it’s wrapping his legs or arms around his partner or just placing his hands on them. 

He also loves inflicting pain during sex. He’s mindful not to do anything that could cause permanent damage or put off his partners too much, so often it’s just scraping his claws down their back or grazing their skin with his teeth. However, if given the chance he would do a lot more. 

Splendorman

As previously stated he has a praise kink. 

He doesn’t have much experience with sex so I doubt even he knows his favorite positions but he’s definitely open to experimenting. He gets a lot of sexual enjoyment from pleasing his partner so I could imagine that his favorite position changes depending on the partner he’s with.   

___________________________________________

Thanks so much for the ask!

INTOXICATED

Pairing: Severus Snape x Reader

Words: 2.4k

Summary: Lupin and Y/N are affected with sex pollen by accident and she goes to Snape for him to help her.

Warning/Content: smut, sex pollen.

MASTERLIST KINKTOBER MASTERLIST

She would kill Remus as soon as she fixes that. Great idea, why not open the suspect power he got from a student and smell it. Y/N groans, walking down the dungeons, hoping that Snape was still awake. Noting the light under the door of his classroom, she knocked softly before opening the door. There he was, working some potion when she entered. 

Snape soon noticed Y/N entering, looking at her oddly. It wasn’t common for her to be there, especially that late. “Are you alright?” He asked, looking at her. 

Y/N was sweating slightly, feeling her body warm and her face was probably red by now. She would kill Lupin for that, that’s for sure “No…” 

He took notice of her flushed appearance and he immediately felt a sense of concern and a bit of confusion as he approached her slowly “What happened? Are you sick?” He asked, trying to keep his voice neutral even as his worry for you grew. 

“No...” Immediately, Y/N took a step back, not wanting to be close to him, especially in those...conditions. Oh, she would kill Lupin. “ 

Snape took another step forward once she took a step back, as a reflex. He paused at her taking a step back again, feeling more confused “Then why are you sweating?” 

“I...” How would she tell him that? “Merlin, this is embarrassing...” Y/N looked down, trying to control her breathing and her mind, that kept telling for her to just forget everything and jump on the man right in front of her. And his deep voice wasn’t helping her case.  

Snape tilted his head in confusion, his concern slowly turning into irritation “Spit it out, I don’t have all night.” 

“So...” Y/N started “Lupin confiscated a small vial from a boy on his class... and he decided we should check it...” 

“And?” His eyes darkened slightly as you mentioned Lupin, he disliked the man like the plague, and he had to hold back a scoff.  

“And it had this kind of powder...”  

Snape as getting even more irritated as she being proposedly vague in her answer “What powder?” 

Y/N looked at her hands, ignoring his question “And we thought ‘hey, we should check this...” 

He was starting to grow frustrated now, his patience wearing thin, as she ignored his question. He took a step closer, his voice growing a bit sharper “I asked you a question. What powder?” 

She sighs, looking back at him “It was a pink powder...it seems like...like an aphrodisiac or something like that...” 

“You’re joking…” He said, trying to remain composed as he looked at Y/N, his mind going over a thousand scenarios suddenly. 

Y/N shakes her head, biting her lip before she spoke again “Yeah...funny thing though. Lupin accidently spilled on us and we end up inhaling it.” 

If his eyes widened more, they would pop right out of their sockets. “You what.” He said lowly, his voice taking on a dangerous edge as he stared at her, his entire body growing rigid. 

“We didn’t know what it was!” She quickly says in her defense, but she had to agree that it did sound stupid. 

“Are you two idiotic?” Snape snapped, his voice now filled with a mixture of disbelief and annoyance. He couldn’t understand how two adults who worked at a school could be so careless, and honestly, neither did she. “Spilling and inhaling any form of powder without knowing what it is...You could have poisoned yourselves beyond repair!” 

“It was an accident.” Cleary, she didn’t have much to defend herself and Lupin. It was stupid, but they didn’t think a student would have a poison. But considering some students...they should. 

“If you would have been poisoned you could have died, you understand that, yes?” He asked firmly, his eyes never leaving her face, suddenly thankful she was still breathing. 

Y/N sighs. Snape was right, like always. “Not our brightest moment, I admit.”  

“Not your brightest moment?” He repeated, his voice taking on a mocking edge as he looked at her “You should know better. The both of you. Grown adults. Careless enough to do this.” 

 “Please, just tell me you have some potion that can help me with...this.” She looked at him, almost begging. The effects were worse by the moment, being here, with him, alone, wasn’t helping. His mind was racing to come up with any solution as she spoke the words, and he silently cursed the situation in his head. Cursing Lupin for being an absolute idiot, cursing Y/N for being so careless.  

 “You’re sure it’s an…aphrodisiac?” He asked lowly, narrowing his eyes slightly as he looked at her. 

Y/N rolled her eyes at him “Yes. I’m very sure.” 

He returned her eye rolling, his expression hardening “I’m just trying to make sure I give you the correct information. What are you feeling, exactly?”  

“I’m feeling warm and...you know, aroused.” She says, her voice a little lower now. Snape whole mind went blank for a split second. He hadn’t expected her to be so straightforward with it, and he didn’t know how to handle it.  

“Warm, and…aroused?” He echoed, his voice sounding hoarse as he spoke. 

“Yes. Aroused.” She felt like he was doubting her? No, it was something else. “What else do I need to say? That I feel my panties soaked? That I just want someone to fuck me right on this moment so this will pass? That I feel like I’ll die if I don’t get a dick right now?” 

His eyes darkened as she spoke, the words going straight to his body and making his mind fill with more thoughts he tried desperately to push down “No, there’s no need for that…” He said firmly, a hint of agitation in his voice as he clenched his jaw again. Merlin, why was this situation suddenly so much torturous for him? 

Snape took a deep breath before continuing, trying to pull himself together “I’m not sure there’s a specific potion for this sort of predicament.”  

Y/N groans frustrated, leaning against the wall. Great. He could practically see the frustration rolling off of her. He took another step toward her, despite feeling as though he should do the opposite “I’m trying to find a solution, have a bit of patience, will you?” 

“Easy for you to say. You’re not the one affected by the aphrodisiac.” Y/N says a little sharp than she intended. 

He couldn’t help the slight twitch of irritation that crossed his face as she snapped at him “Oh, forgive if you and Lupin can’t use a single brain cell to think that open an unknow powder would be a bad idea.” 

Another sigh of frustration left her lips “I know, I know. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. It’s just...hard to think right now.” 

“It’s fine…don’t apologize, just give me a moment to think…” He was irritated, yes, but he also understood what she was going through. 

She nods and put some more distance between them. “I feel like I’ll die if I don’t fuck.”  

“That’s the effect of the aphrodisiac. I’m trying to find a way to help.” Snape was thinking of every potion he knows, every book he ever read about the subject but he couldn’t think of nothing to help her with the effects of the powder.  

“You can help.” She says, looking at him. Yes, probably her brain turned to jelly right now for her to be saying that. But she couldn’t help, she couldn’t stand anymore what she was feeling, all the desire, all the lust she have for him taking over. 

“How can I help?” He said, his voice suddenly sounding a bit huskier than before. He was starting to struggle with his own thoughts. 

Y/N takes a few steps forward to him “You know how.” 

His body tensed as he looked at her, the words sinking in, and he found himself torn between trying to fight his own thoughts and desires, or giving in to the situation “You know I shouldn’t…I’m your colleague...” 

“I don’t care right now.” She says while her hands reach the buttons of his robes, opening one by one. A shudder traveled over his body as he felt her hands working on his black robe, her fingers slowly moving across the buttons. His heart began to speed up further, his breathing growing a bit harsher as he looked down at you. 

“Merlin…” He breathed, his voice a strangled tone. 

The robe had a lot of buttons, but soon she finished, discarding somewhere on the floor. She started opening the white button shirt. Snape no longer trying to fight against the situation. He knew there was no point, not anymore. And he wanted this. He wanted her. His shirt soon fell to the floor, leaving him in the undershirt and pants, feeling the heat in his body spreading over his body like wildfire as he stared at you. 

“How many layers do you use?” She asks while she pulls the undershirt off his body, also discarding with the other pieces of clothes.  

Snape couldn’t help a small chuckle at her question while she left him in just his pants now, before he spoke “Too many…I’m starting to regret that decision…” 

Y/N was fast to pull all of her clothes off, she was desperate for his cock right now. She didn’t waste any time and soon she was naked in front of him pulling his pants down with his underwear. 

He didn’t protest as she free him from the last pieces of clothing, his own eagerness to be free from the tight material fueling the movement more than his own actions. He was finally completely naked in front of her. Y/N pulled the potion master to a kiss, a messy and desperate kiss while their bodies were finally together.   

His arms immediately wrapped around her, pulling her even closer to him as his tongue quickly made its way into her mouth, tasting her desperately. 

A low moan left her mouth both from the kiss and from the feeling of his body against her. His hands began to roam over her body as the kiss continued, his touch desperate and hard as it slid over every inch of your skin. Her hands did the same. He started to maneuverer both of them towards his desk, his mind consumed by his need for her now that he has her right there. 

He lifted her by her waist and placed her on the edge of the desk, his body pressing between her. Her hands kept exploring his body, until she stopped by his hard cock, slowly stroking him.   

“Careful…don’t tease me unless you want this to end quickly…” Snape says, looking her with lust in his eyes. 

“Merlin, no.” she chuckles softly before she wrapped her legs around him to pull him impossible closer. She then whispered on his ear “I need you now.” 

A soft growl escaped him as his hands moved to her hips, pulling her closer against him as he positioned himself against her entrance. His eyes never left hers when he slowly entered her with ease. 

Y/N moans, the feeling even more intense because of the effect of the powder. Snape’s mind went blank for a moment, his body shuddering against hers as he finally became completely enveloped inside her. He let out a strangled moan, struggling to keep any form of control as he starts to thrust. 

“Faster.” She says with a small moan. She needed more. He didn’t respond verbally, but his body reacted automatically, his hips snapping against hers as he fastens his pace.  

“Yes...”Y/N moans again as he speeds up his pace. 

It didn’t take long for Snape starts feeling her tightening on him and he knew she was getting closer, and in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to hear she coming for him. He was breathing hard, his mind lost in the sensations as he continued to move against her, his pace growing faster and more desperate. 

The sounds of their moans started to get louder as did the sound of their skin against each other. Y/N couldn’t hold back anymore. Her orgasm hit her harder than any time before. Her back arched and her eyes rolled from the intensity.  

Snape felt the clenching around his cock and it didn’t take long for him to cum, spilling his hot seed on her.  

The aphrodisiac finally stopped working as she tries to control her breath. She felt relief like she never felt before after being so affected by the powder. She finally found her voice to speak “Thanks...”  

He looked at her as he pulls out of her, his breathing still coming out in harsh pants as he spoke “You’re…welcome…” Y/N suddenly started laughing, confusing Snape. It was almost absurd that a situation like this ended with her laughing, but here she was “What’s so funny?” 

“I can’t believe you just fucked me on your desk.” She says between her laugh.  

He chuckled, his expression still a bit amused “You find it funny that we did it on my desk…and not the fact that this whole situation occurred because you were affected by an aphrodisiac?” 

“That too.” She says, chuckling and slowly getting off the table.  

Snape chuckled again, watching as she slowly stood up. He quickly reached for his wand, cleaning the mess of the desk before speaking “I suppose this means the aphrodisiac is no longer a concern, then?” 

Y/N nods, grabbing their clothes from the ground and giving his to him.  

He takes his clothes back, a somewhat awkward feeling beginning to settle as he began re-dressing, not looking at her “And I assume you’ll want to forget this whole…situation, yes?” 

She did the same with her clothes “I...” 

As she spoke, he paused, his hands stilling at the button of his shirt as he finally looked over at her with a slight raise of his eyebrow “You what?” 

Y/N looked at him, all dressed “It would be too bad if I said I don’t?” 

Snape paused for a moment, his heart giving a slight flutter as he heard her words “Are you…saying what I think you’re saying?” She looked at him, apprehensive of his reaction. Maybe this was one side thing. He held her gave for a moment before walking over to her and kissing her. The kiss was different. It was more gentle, more soft. He finally pulled away, his hand coming up to play with a piece of her hair "Remind me to thank Lupin for being an absolutely moron."