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Does "narcissist abuse" exist?

Well, I'll try to think of this as unbiased as possible.

Narcissist and Abuser are not synonymous. Many narcissists make an effort to not harm others and have never been or are currently not abusers.

NPD is a disorder with different presentations and sufferers have differents traits and severities: some narcissists are aggressive and external; some are more internal; some may be concerned with being a good person; some may overcompensate for their narcissism; some may take out the issues of their disorder on others; some may have trouble self-reflecting and hurt others; some may never hurt anyone; some may know how to deal with their traits while others may not.

NPD is a disorder that impacts both the sufferer and the people around them. It is important to talk about the sufferer, but also to acknowledge that it affects others as well. Especially if someone is untreated and unaware of their disorder.

It can cause someone to hurt others if it is left unchecked, if they were taught to hurt others, if they are unaware of their behavior, if they lack self-control, or if they simply have no desire to be a good person.

An abuser with NPD's reasons and ways of abusing someone may be different, just as an abuser with autism's would...and an abuser with depression, an abuser with bipolar, an abuser with schizophrenia, or an abuser who is not mentally ill at all.

I have heard a story about a woman with schizophrenia who was convinced her children were possessed by the devil and tried to attack them. Does this mean everyone with schizophrenia is dangerous? No. Absolutely not. Did her disorder affect the way she treated others in a negative way? Yes, because it presented in this way, and she was completely unaware and untreated. She is a victim in the fact she was dealing with these delusions and this fear, just as her children were victims for having to deal with the way she acted. Again: someone being schizophrenic does not mean they will hurt you. If someone who is schizophrenic tries to hurt you, that isn't representative of everyone with schizophrenia. (Many people with schizophrenia do not try to harm people at all.)

I also heard about the difficulties of a child living with bipolar mother who treated her disorder with alcohol, causing her to accidentally harm her child in many ways. Obviously, her disorder and addiction are relevant in talking about the experience, but we all know people with bipolar disorder are not abusers just because they are bipolar; and addicts are not abusers just because they are addicts.

Abuse can be done on accident, especially if someone was raised around it or thinking it was okay, or if they have a disorder affecting how they see things. In some cases, explaining and trying to help people realize their behavior can work. In others, it won't; some people don't want to listen or get better. If thats the case, thats on them. But no matter what, abuse is a choice. It can be done without awareness; but it is still a choice.

Anyone can be an abuser, and the equation of one disorder with abuse is not only dehumanizing to the people with this disorder, but can actually hurt victims of abusers who aren't narcissists, or victims who are narcissists.

My point is that it can be relevant to say your abuser had NPD. But someone being an abuser doesn't mean they are a narcissist, and the NPD isn't what needs highlighted...its the abuse. Yes, you can say your abuser had NPD, I don't think it's wrong to make a space to discuss this with people who had a similar experience either.

Many people in my family are narcissists/narcissistic, and quite a few of them hurt people or have been abusive. So I won't deny that a lot of narcissists (especially ones who externalize their narcissism and who are completely untreated, also when they refuse to admit they have a problem) treat others badly. I also know some of them don't actually have bad intentions and that others do have (in a way) bad intentions. Some were raised to think it was okay. I also know of narcissists who internalize it, who are aware of their narcissism, who do their best to not hurt others, who are victims themselves.

NPD should be talked about from the perspective of people with NPD, but this doesn't mean people who dealt with abusive people with NPD can't talk about it. As I said, I had no problem with an article about an abusive mother who had bipolar disorder; it was relevant.

A lot of "narcissistic abuse" described is just abuse. A list of abusive behaviors doesn't need to say narcissist at the top. It is completely irrelevant. Say it if it is relevant.

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TLDR; Your abuser being a narcissist can be relevant, and you can talk about it, narcissists can be abusers and their disorder can play a part in it. But not all narcissists are abusers, and "narcissist" is equated with abuser. This is why people do not like the term "narcissistic abuse." It, in a way, equates narcissism with abuse. "Narcissistic abuse" is as real as "autistic abuse" or "bipolar abuse."

Don't use narcissist as a word for abuser. Say it if it's relevant.

I have no problem with a subreddit, therapy group, or community for people who dealt with abusive narcissists, but I want people to not perpetuate a stigma.

I sympathize with those who were abused, but narcissism isn't abuse; abuse is abuse. Narcissism can play a part, but that is not what the abuse is, and that is not THE cause of the abuse.

Abuse is abuse, and anyone can abuse.

A sign every artist and crafter should have on their site and window.

When I get my site up and running I’m putting this on the Commission/Payment page.

Almost done with my crochet strip lace cotton ribbon for raising awareness of the ongoing hostage crisis. It still needs to be starched and sewn in place. Still not sure where I can ask to have it displayed, but I’ll figure it out. Let me know if you have any ideas.

So @omeryotam4 requested I make a master list of articles involving Jewish indigenous identity and Arab colonialism

en.m.wikipedia.org

History of ancient Israel and Judah - Wikipedia

History of ancient Israel and Judah - Wikipedia

Los Angeles Times

Letters to the Editor: Jews are indigenous to Israel. They're defending their homeland, not 'colonizing' it

Characterizing the war in Gaza as a 'colonial' battle belittles Jews' ancestral ties to Israel and their history of being forced from their

Tablet Magazine

Are Jews Indigenous to the Land of Israel? Yes.

Discover the archaeology, genealogy, and history that supports Jewish claim as the indigenous peoples of Israel.

JIMENA

Jewish Indigeneity to Israel by Sarah Levin - JIMENA

By Sarah Levin October 15, 2021 Late last night as I was falling asleep, I was reading a narrative cartoon from Jewish Currents called “When

Newsweek

Are Jews Indigenous People? Here's What a Native American Jew Thinks

As indigenous people who reclaimed our ancestral homeland, we must be sensitive to others undergoing that same process.

MinnPost

Don't erase our history: The Jewish people are indigenous to the land of Israel - MinnPost

The truth is that the conflict between Israelis and Palestinians is the agonizing struggle between not one, but two indigenous peoples fight

en.m.wikipedia.org

Arabization - Wikipedia

Arabization - Wikipedia

en.m.wikipedia.org

Early Muslim conquests - Wikipedia

Early Muslim conquests - Wikipedia

There’s a Senate inquiry into the worsening rental crisis!

Thanks to the Greens you can now write a submission to a committee inquiry into how the rental crisis is affecting you and your community, provide evidence, and shape the reports that’ll be given to the National Cabinet in September and November to suggest how they can address the rental crisis.

This is super important! The information that YOU give to this inquiry will inform both the state and federal government about just how dire the situation is and help it understand how it needs to do more to fix the rental crisis in Australia.

So share - and don’t forget to click here to submit BY 28 JULY!!!

Twitter thread by Melissa Caruso about a labyrinthine magical bookstore in Syracuse, NY. Link to the first tweet in the thread; most pictures have image descriptions! Now here are the screenshots of that thread:

And then a hero of the labyrinthine magical bookstores of the world put all the bookstores that people listed in the replies on a map! (Google Maps link)

Thank you for the 14 followers! Sorry have not posted anything original, I have been struggling with medical issues and school. Good thing is that medical issues might be resolved soon and school is almost over. The comic outline I have been working on is up to the 8th chapter.

Thank you @mdoodlerfandomart for the ink art. I had fun coloring my favorite HTTYD ship.

The original