the only reason i'm not an alcoholic is because every alcohol i've tried tastes like absolute ass and i physically can't swallow more than a mouthful
this 🤏 close to clawing out my ovaries with my nails
please invite your disabled friends to things.
"we didn't invite you because we didn't think you'd want to/be able to come" is not a kind statement.
just ask us. if we say no, then we say no. but what if we say yes?
parties, social events, theatre, cinema, theme parks, museums, whatever. if you're inviting the rest of the friendship group, invite your disabled friends too.
The fearmongering around medical transition for transmascs will never not be upsetting to me.
“you’re gonna look ugly as a man” “but you’re such a pretty girl, don’t change that” Wrong. You will look different after T, but you will look happy. You will probably grow hair and gain weight and look pretty different, and none of that is bad or makes you less desirable. You are going to look like you and that’s all that matters.
“T makes you angry” “you’re gonna be a scary man i won’t feel safe around you” Wrong. Testosterone does not “make” you angry. Messing with your hormones will mess with your emotions for sure, but you will not immediately become some scary predator when you start T. Being a man/masculine does not make you a threat, a predator, or inherently angry. That’s radfem shit.
“bottom growth is gross” “no one will want you with bottom growth” Wrong. Bottom growth is cool and a LOT of guys end up loving theirs a lot more than they thought they would. For a lot of people it is a desirable trait, there are people who find bottom growth hot and attractive. And! If you’re sure you don’t want it there’s things you can do to work around that, just talk to your provider.
“bottom surgery is super painful and not worth it” First off, call it phalloplasty, because that’s what you’re talking about. Second, yes it’s painful, it’s surgery. There are risks to it and complications can happen, but that’s true of any surgery. Phallo might not be for you, but it is life saving care for other folks. It is beautiful and should be talked about as life saving care and not as some afterthought thing that no one actually does.
Being transmasculine is a beautiful thing. Transitioning medically is not something every trans person wants, but if you notice yourself holding back for the reasons i’ve listed above (or similar) maybe reconsider.
i wish people understood how much it hurts to lose memories so quickly
mental illness is supposed to be mental wtf is this aching pit in my chest
and if you're not going to invite us, at the very least don't ask us to help you plan the fucking event.
it has happened so many times to me that my friends will ask for ideas about their parties and talk extensively and excitedly about their plans, only to turn around and make the decision for me that i'm not coming.
"i don't think you'd like it"
"it's going to be loud"
"i didn't think you'd want to come"
let me make my own mind up. don't put an answer in my mouth before you've even asked the question. and if you don't want me there at all, don't talk to me about your plans.
please invite your disabled friends to things.
"we didn't invite you because we didn't think you'd want to/be able to come" is not a kind statement.
just ask us. if we say no, then we say no. but what if we say yes?
parties, social events, theatre, cinema, theme parks, museums, whatever. if you're inviting the rest of the friendship group, invite your disabled friends too.
Idk what trans man needs to hear this but you're NOT evil or disgusting for being a man. You do NOT have to suffer for the sins of the patriarchy committed by cis dudes. Being a man doesn't invalidate the misogyny you experienced growing up or experience now. Being a man doesn't mean you deserve to be isolated. Being a man doesn't mean you're inherently predatory or scary. You didn't "choose" this, and finding your true self is NOT "betraying the community" because you happen to be a man and/or masculine rather than a woman and/or feminine. You ARE allowed to be upset when people "affirm" your gender by malgendering you.
You DO deserve a community that uplifts you. You DO deserve to experience trans joy. You DO deserve to have your voices heard and your struggles recognized. Wanting the bare minimum of solidarity is NOT "making everything about trans men".
i wish more people understood that maladaptive daydreaming is not some fun quirky thing and it is genuinely difficult to live with
can we normalize talking about how fucking debilitating agoraphobia is cool thanks
The most terrifying part of having memory issues is when you can feel something from 5 seconds ago be thrown out the window and there's an empty hole where it once was. You remember that you forgot something.