C- C- C- Can You Maybe Make Kwazii X Shellington Headcanons ???? I Need More Of Them In My Life Its So

Incorrect Octonauts Quotes: Professor Inkling centric

Tw/Cw for swearing

Also a little OOC for some ^^'

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Professor Inkling: I'm sorry, but I've looked through the entire library

Professor Inkling: I've looked in every book, checked every page

Professor Inkling: But I just can't find where I give a fuck

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Barnacles: Professor! I have a few questions to ask you

Professor Inkling: I could say the same to you, but you go first

Barnacles: Oh, go ahead!

Professor Inkling: Thank you, I was just wondering why I could hear you playing your accordion at 5am?

Barnacles:

Barnacles: 😶

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Professor Inkling: So, explain the premise of this game again?

Tweak: Alright, so it's kind of like Alchemy, you take these things, put them together, and it makes a new things. You can make anything!

Professor Inkling: That makes sense...

*Five hours later*

Tweak: Hey Professor, just checking...

Tweak:

Tweak: How the hell did you make an entire empire ruled by Cephalopods???

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Professor Inkling: Let me check my books...

Shellington: What are you looking for?

Professor Inkling: Well for one, how to get you on a proper sleep schedule...

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Shellington, triedly walking into the library at 3am: Professor? Why are you still awake??

Professor Inkling, wide awake: Sleep is an illusion and time is a social construct

Shellington, quickly turning around: Understood have a nice night-

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Professor Inkling: As you know, I am an Expert at Tentacle Wrestling!!

Kwazii: A professional you say...?

Kwazii: *pulls out a vacuum cleaner with pool noodles taped to the hose*

Kwazii: Let's see if you can wrestle THIS-

Professor Inkling, having done this before: Bring it >:/

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Headcanon that Professor Inkling is a parental figure to the entire crew and has learned internet culture from Dashi

Also that Kwazii will sometimes challenge him with odd contraptions they've made

I apologize for being inactive ^^'

Incorrect Octonauts Quotes based on more dumb things I've said/done

Tw/Cw for swearing, mention of faking de♤th

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Kwazii: There are no suitable homos

Tweak: Oh no! No suitable homos!!

Dashi: ...aren't all of us homos-

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Peso: Sir, your potatoes are falling

Peso, panicked: SiR, yOuR pOtAtOs ArE fAlLiNg-

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Shellington: Kwazii, should you be doing that?

Kwazii, prepared to bend in ways no person should: Don't doubt my spine

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Professor Inkling: Back in my day, I wasn't blind

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Peso, ready to almost snap: Sometimes you have to hit a 9 year old with a broom

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Shellington, overstimulated and tired: mmh

Some child: O-O

Shellington, still overstimulated and tired: Who is your owner??

Pearl: Shell what the fu-

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Barnacles: Yes, she got abducted

Dashi: Wh-

Barnacles: Adopted, I meant adopted

Dashi: how did you mix up adopted and abducted-?

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Kwazii: Oh I'M SORRY! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO UN-COMPENSATE???

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Barnacles after getting hurt again: Do I count as property damage??

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Shellington: I can't speak that much straight

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Professor Natquik: Please stop aggressively pointing that metal detector at me-

Tracker: *points metal detector more aggressively*

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Barnacles: I wonder who else they have coming up...

Tracker, checked out: Tuba

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Professor Natquik: That's it! I know what will get people to leave me alone!

Professor Natquik: Faking my death!!!

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Kwazii: I think I broke a rib-

Peso: How?

Kwazii: Binder

Shellington shouting from across the room: UNLEASH THE HONKA BONGAS YOU DUMB BITCH, I love you

Peso: What they said but less aggressive

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Bianca: Look at this tiny snake it has no teeth wait why is it doing that is it going to attack me it's going to attack isn't it but it's not going to hurt it doesn't have teeth but a lot of things don't have teeth and it hurts when it bites you like babies why the fuck-

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Tweak: Motorcycle is bike on steroids

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Yes, I say and do a lot of dumb things, and I still have more things I can use to write-

I'm trying to get into writing more characters, mainly those who aren't on the Octopod all the time. I only have access to Octonauts through YouTube so it's a bit difficult lol

Hope you all have a good day/night ^^ ♡

Who's ready for more Incorrect Octonauts stuff? Tw for swearing ^^ _________________________ Kwazii, with a look of fake horror on their face: Why would you eat a child? Shellington, eating scrambled eggs: Why wouldn't you eat a child? Peso walking into the room: I'm sorry WHAT-? _________________________ Tweak, playing genshin impact: Why are there always so many slimes near Dawn Winery? Dashi, having read that story: oh fuck _________________________ Peso: I spent hell knows how many years in medical school, but never once have you failed to amaze me. Kwazii, somehow tangled in a giant rubber band: I try _________________________ Captain Barnacles: Please don't piss on the jellyfish.

_________________________

Professor Inkling, watching the Vegamals get into an argument: I have no clue what's happening, but I'm betting $30 on Turnip Shellington, in shock: You can't do that! Professor Inkling: Watch me. _________________________

Incorrect Octonauts Quotes: Interactions I've had in school

(Please note I'm the voice of reason in most of these)

ALSO EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY GRANDMOTHER!!! ^^

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Kwazii: I got suspended

Barnacles: You got suspended!? How???

Kawaii: I tried to steal a urinal...

Barnacles: yoU TRIED TO STEAL A URINAL???

Kwazii: Keyword: TRIED

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Peso: Please stop eating the starburst wrappers...

Dashi: THEY ARE EDIBLE-

Peso: Just because they are safe for consumption doesn't mean they should BE CONSUMED

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Shellington: *goes nonverbal*

Tweak: Hey!

Shellington:

Tweak: Hey!!

Shellington: ...?

Tweak: Ohhh!!! We're playing the quiet game! Ok, bet!

*proceeds to not talk for the rest of the day thinking it's a game/challenge*

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Kwazii: Ow-

Peso: You good bro?

Kwazii: Ye, I just stabbed myself with a pencil

Peso, panicked: yOu GoOd BrUh?????

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Shellington: How dare you assume I'm Cis

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Kwazii, walking down the halls: Down with the cis! Down With The Cis!! DOWN WITH THE CIS!!!

Some random cishet guy: YEAH!! DOWN WITH THE SITH!!

Kwazii:

Kwazii under his breath: listen you discord mod wanna be-

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Some big + tall guy: *lunges forward suddenly trying to intimidate Dashi*

Dashi: *charges forward after him*

The guy: *runs in fear as Dashi chases him*

Barnacles: Haahaa, nice

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Shellington: These are my husbands: Kwazii, Peso, and Dashi ^^ (queer platonic relationship)

Shellington: And these are our adopted children

*takes a deep breath*

Tunip, Codish, Barrot, Grouber, Tominnow, Pikato, Halibeet, Sharchinni*, Perchkin, Yamchovy, Wallabaga, Charchard, Maccoli, Carprika, Albachoy, Salepeño, and Tardelery!!

Shellington: Am I forgetting any?

Kwazii, whispering: Vegi-bot

Shellington: VEGI-BOT!!

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Tweak: I take extreme pride and pleasure in being able to scare an entire football team just by existing

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Barnacles, thinking: this stress ball is pretty good! Super strong and resistant too. It won't break ^^

*2 minutes later*

Stress Ball, which is filled with liquid gel: *breaks, and spills all over Barnacles*

Barnacles: fuCK-

•─────✧─────•

*any vegimal after Sharchinni only appeared in the books

I hate to ask this, but if you see this post, can you please interact? I took a small break and my spread/reach went way down, and I'm not 100% sure as to why-

Imagine Tracker and Paani on a Mission, what would their friendship be like?

yes yes Yes YEs YES YES YESSSS!!!

Both are super smart and incredibly skilled at what they do, and they have a good amount of field experience. They would probably work well together ^^

Tracker is a pretty grounded while Paani is more out there (and kinda chaotic), so it would be like this almost:

OR, ALTERNATIVELY, if Paani managed to influence Tracker:

Yes, Tracker is pretty reserved and shy, but if they are anything like me, once they meet that person they are out. One of the most chaotically polite people you'll meet. Then you have the enabler who also knows how to reel both of them back? Best Duo Ever.

Paani is super friendly too, so I feel like the connection would form pretty fast ^^

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I can totally see a mission going like this:

Tracker: Ok, so it says here that in order to-

Paani: *is already running off*

-

Paani: Come on! It's amazing out here!

Tracker, a Polar Bear in the middle of the desert: it's WHAT?

-

Tracker: Feel that crisp air!

Paani, a Macaque Monkey who is in the Antarctic: I can't even feel my face...

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They zone our so often it's scary, you'll just seem them staring down a wall like it owes them money like:

° - °

• - •

Also Paani is way shorter, I will stand by this headcanon. 5'2 Paani vs 6'3 Tracker

Paani would just jump tackle Tracker for fun. Out of now where, Tracker can just be standing there and then BOOM, Paani.

Tracker walks super quietly, which leads to them scaring Paani almost every mission they are on.

They would casually fight over directions while somehow going the right way regardless, one is yelling "We go South!", the other is yelling "No, East!", while walking North and they still make it somehow.

ACCIDENT PRONE!!! BOTH OF THEM!! What's that? There's a hole there? They would walk into that hole, one after the other, even if they saw the other fall first.

Tracker has no depth perception, Paani took it all.

Tracker just has a lot of bad luck, such as random things falling on or around them. The bad luck rubs off of Paani whenever they work together, which may or may not have led to Paani getting hit with their rod a few times-

They both have such dumb but smart ideas. The ideas are amazing and can seriously help people and creatures, but the way the phrase it is so out there-

-

Autism (Tracker) and ADHD (Paani) Solidarity

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Just those people who you'd look at and think "they'd never get along", but they get along so well it's scary. And they're both enablers to each others antics, mainly Paani, but Tracker does it more often than you'd think.

Some bros being dudes :)

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Some images I have that fit their friendship vibe:

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Sorry for this being so messy and all over the place, my brain hasn't been working well for a little bit and I'm sure the writing here reflects that ^^;

Hi ! Was wondering if I could request some kwasoton prompts/headcannons? :0 /nf

Bet >:)

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- Peso is the only one with a semi decent sleep schedule and often has to drag Kwazii and Shellington to sleep

- Kwazii will randomly use Shellington and/or Peso as a pillow. Whatever they were doing before doesn't matter, they now have Kwazii on their lap/shoulder

- Shellington will randomly give Kwazii and Peso small items. Kwazii is confused at first, Peso is a mess every time >:)

- Peso learned how to make kandi from Dashi and makes gifts for Shellington and Kwazii

- Kwazii can and will "steal" objects from the others to show affection (he makes sure they see/notice)

- Shellington is the first to fall asleep every movie night

- Peso always has a tiny sewing kit on hand for whenever Kwazii manages to rip his clothing or if Shellingtons bag ever rips

- When the others are stressed, Kwazii will kind of just like, lay on them and start purring

- Shellington has a collection of Squishmallows that "somehow" match Kwazii and Peso (they altered the plushies lol)

- Peso will try to stop Kwazii and Shellington from doing stupid things, but half way through it will be more of a "haa haa don't" instead of "wait no don't-"

- Kwazii will send some of the most random things, ranging from saying he's going to steal someone's knees, to saying they are going to affectionately unalive someone

- If Shellington sees something, they have to go pick it up. There's no stopping it, they have to go and pick up the object

- Shellington and Peso wear glasses/contacts

- They all stim together, you can't convince me otherwise

- They trade + share fidgets (minus chewelry and their main comfort fidget[s])

- None of them have good depth perception, they have a list keeping track of how many times they accidently bumb into objects or people

- Whenever Kwazii finds a new place with treasure Peso and Shellington help them make/draw a map by hand

- If one of them fixates on something it's likely they will all fixate on it. There was some point where they were all fixated on Pokemon thanks to Kwazii (pretend that Pokemon games exist in their world-)

- Shellington knows how to knit and tried to teach the others. Long story short, Peso is kind of good, and Kwazii managed to get stuck and tangled in the yarn and somehow tied to a chair

- Peso has tried to each them how to do basic first aid, which failed horribly. I will leave what happened to your imagination

- Shellington steals their clothing normally

- Kwazii has 0 cold resistance, Peso has 0 heat resistance, Shellington is "neutral" (can't handle anything too hot or cold)

- They have each other's safe foods + triggers memorized

- Aggressively corrects anyone who misgenders their s/o(s) and/or friends

- Aggressive affection. Kwazii will pounce, Shellington will nip, Peso will preen out of nowhere

- Sleep piles. These people sleep in a pile whenever they sleepover/are together on a mission

- Kwazii starts with the idea of doing chaotic things. Shellington enables them. Peso tries to stop them but gets dragged in. Chaos ensues

- That one screenshot of the 3 people on the subway? The person sleeping with pizza, person with crow/raven on their leg, and person in a wedding dress crying? That's them. Shellington, Kwazii, Peso

- During Halloween they try to coordinate their costumes. This almost never works

- Kwazii will quote random things. Peso and Shellington won't understand and end up having to watch/learn about what he quoted

- They will point at each other whenever they see each other and either yell "gay", "you're gay", "trans person spotted", or something else

- Peso found out that Shellington and Kwazii react to lazer pointers. Do with that what you will

- Kwazii got them both into Homestuck.

•─────♡─────•

This is the image I was talking about

As well as some other stuff that would happen with the trio

Enjoy the chaos >:3

Requests are still open ^^

Sonic Miku >:)

sonic miku. reblog her immediately.

Might I request baranacles x kwazii headcanons If they havent been done yet?

Sure thing!!

Also: I'm happy to do requests of characters I've done before!! Same for any headcanons and/or scenarios ^^

[I apologize if some quotes repeat for different characters, some work for several ^^;]

** = tw for that quote

Pink boarder = NSFW

Cw/Tw for mention of drugs in one quote and implied NSFW (minor/small amount)

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Barnacles walking into the kitchen and seeing all of their pineapples* peeled: Kwazii, what in the ever loving H-E-L-L?

Kwazii, drinking water as he didn't spend hours peeling pineapples: Morning! :3

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Kwazii: Alright, I'm going to pick up the wedding cake

Barnacles: Perfect, while you do that I'll go talk to the ring bear

Kwazii: Ay-

Kwazii: Wait-

Kwazii: You mean ring bearER, right??

Barnacles: Ummm...

Orson and Ursa in the other room: OwO

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Kwazii: So, I heard you like cats?

Barnacles: Why yes, I do!

Kwazii: *calmly twists their body in a way only cats can*

Barnacles, scared and shocked: *aggressively sounds octo alert*

Barnacles: Peso...

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Barnacles: Danger never rests, we must remain vigilant

Kawaii: You haven't slept in almost a week please-

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Kwazii and Barnacles during The Carrier Crab + Sea Urchin episode:

Barnacles: Well, this is getting both embarrassing and concerning...

Kwazii: GETTING? It's been since we answered the door!

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Barnacles: Kwazii, isn't this a bit... too dangerous??

Kwazii: Captain, please! We've been in TONS of unexpected and dangerous predicaments before! And we've always managed to get away without a scratch!

Barnacles: ...

Kwazii: Sometimes. Sometimes we get away without a scratch...

Barnacles: ',:/

Kwazii: ...

Kwazii: Ok, once... and the gup crashed on the way back...

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Kwazii: Here's a fun fact! There's a company that turns dead bodies into ocean reefs!

Barnacles:

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Kwazii and Barnacles on an Island with a volcano

Barnacles: It's very hot on this island, and there are no signs of wild life either...

Kwazii: I know! It's so hot that the mountain over there is smoking and melting!

Barnacles looking up at the "mountain:: *sees smoke and lava*

Barnacles: I don't know how you manage this-

Kwazii: Manage what?

Barnacles, already sounding an octo alert: That's a volcano Kwazii...

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Kwazii: Pardon the disturbance Captain-

Barnacles: You're laying on my desk-

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Barnacles: You got arrested for stealing a parrot?

Kawaii: It looked like Pete...

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Barnacles, swimming out of a deep hole: Hello Kwazii

Kwazii, in shock: You died?? Your oxygen ran out!!! I SAW YOU DIE-

Barnacles, calm as ever: Death is an illusion, now let's get back to the gup, my air tank is almost empty...

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**

Barnacles: What are amphetamines again?

Kwazii: Drugs that can go on land and water

Barnacles: No...

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Kwazii when they first joined the Octonauts: While I don't know much about you, I'm confident that you put yourself in danger a lot more than you should...

Barnacles: I...

Tweak from the other room: YOU'RE CORRECT!!

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Barnacles: I'm about to do something stupid...

Kwazii: Me?

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Barnacles: *cracks his knuckles*

Kwazii: Hey, check this out!

Kwazii: *folds*

Barnacles: Wha-

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Kwazii: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus

Barnacles: WHERE do you keep getting these facts?

Kawaii: Shellington :)

•─────✦─────•

*I asked ppl for a random fruit and one said Pineapple

Sorry for this taking so long ^^ Schools been beating my ass lol

Requests are still open ^^

Tweak x Kwazii incorrect quotes? I love your blog btw!

Thank you so much ^^

(I [still] haven't seen Ring of Fire, so I'm going to swing blindly at the wind and hope I did something)

Now that I'm reading over all I've written, this is 99% chaos

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Tweak: I'm going to need a human skull, but you can't ask why

Kwazii: Aye, as long as you don't ask where I got them

Kwazii: *pulls out 3 well preserved human skulls*

Tweak: ò - ó

Tweak, grabbing one: This one, thanks

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Kwazii, standing over a volcano: WE EITHER DIE FREE, OR DIE TRYING!!!

Tweak, right next to him: ARE THOSE REALLY THE ONLY CHOICES!?

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Tweak: Does anyone here know a good vendor of brass knuckles? Profesional quality preferred

Barnacles: You say, the MOST concerning things sometimes...

Kwazii: Here

*hands Tweak high quality brass knuckles*

Tweak: Thanks!

Barnacles, in shock: ',:|

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Tweak: Why are you on fire?

Kwazii: No clue, but I'm vibing

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Tweak: We vegatarians love the environment!

Kwazii: How can you say you love the environment, when yOU KEEP EATING ALL OF THE PLANTS-

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Kwazii: You know, it's nice to be wanted ^^

*sirens sound in the distance*

Tweak, running into the room: NOT BY THE LAW-

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Tweak: Did you get the eggs?

Kwazii: I found something even better!

Tweak: Kwazii-

Kwazii: *holds up a chicken*

Kwazii: Her name is Pecky! Like Becky, but Peck!

Vegamals: *collective face palm*

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Kwazii: I'm in love with you

Tweak, covered in baking powder: We called off the prank war less than an hour ago??

Kwazii: Yeah I know

Tweak: o _ o

Tweak: Ah, ok, got it. Cool. Very cool. Nice. Yes. Um.... coolcoolcool-

Kwazii: >:)

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Kwazii: What are your three (3) best qualities?

Tweak: Smart, soft hair, and I can easily bench press you

──────────

Tweak: What are your three (3) best qualities?

Kwazii: Fast, cunning, and being a beacon of chaos 24/7

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Tweak: Screwdriver-

Kwazii: Screwdriver

Tweak: Wrench-

Kwazii: Wrench

Tweak: Lazer pointer-

Kwazii: Lazer poi...

Kwazii: Wait-

Tweak: *turns on the lazer pointer and points it to a nearby wall*

Kwazii: RED DOT-

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Kwazii, trying to flirt: So... what would you do if you were in bed with me?

Tweak: Is your bed comfortable

Kwazii: Yes...?

Tweak: I'd sleep.

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Kwazii running towards Tweak: CATCH ME!!

Tweak, who's working on the gups: What-

Kwazii: *crashes into Tweak and lands both of them in the water*

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Tweak: Is something burning?

Kwazii: Just my love for you

Tweak, looking behind Kwazii: Nope, that palm tree is on fire

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Tweak: I owe you one

Kwazii: 7pm, under the stars. It's a date >:)

•─────✦─────•

Requests are still open ^^

I'm also working on the rules and general stuff for asks/request + introduction

Incorrect Octonauts Quotes: Christmas/Holiday ^^

•─────✧─────•

Barnacles: ...

Barnacles: Care to explain what happened-?

Kwazii, up to his waist in fake snow: no

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Peso: I love the winter season :)

Peso: *remembers he has like 50 siblings*

Peso:

Peso: fuck

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Dashi: Alright, everyone line up, it's time to see who had the ugliest sweater! Professor Inkling is the judge, as always, with the Vegimals of course

Peso: *is wearing a sweater his mom made*

Kwazii: *is wearing a sweater he made by cutting up and sewing other sweaters together with a mirror taped to it*

Shellington: *has a normal sweater because the ugly ones are too scratchy for him*

Tweak: *tossed on a normal sweatshirt and attached lights and ornaments to it*

Dashi: *has an over sized fluffy sweater that can kill a man*

Barnacles: *had a sweater on before, but it got too hot so he took it off*

Professor Inkling:

Professor Inkling: I don't know what to do with this-

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Shellington: *is trying to make cookies*

Kwazii, walking into the kitchen: Whatcha making there Shellington?

Shellington, holding a burnt tray of cookies: regret

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Tweak: Alright, fake snow machine is ready!

Kwazii: LET'S GO!! *pulls the lever down completely*

Tweak: waiT NO-

Machine: *explodes, causing an insane amount of fake snow to covering the entire HQ in deep [fake] snow*

Kwazii: ha-

Kwazii: ohno-

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I'm still trying to figure out how to get my reach back here ^^;

I was doing so good before lol