Might I request baranacles x kwazii headcanons If they havent been done yet?
Sure thing!!
Also: I'm happy to do requests of characters I've done before!! Same for any headcanons and/or scenarios ^^
[I apologize if some quotes repeat for different characters, some work for several ^^;]
** = tw for that quote
Pink boarder = NSFW
Cw/Tw for mention of drugs in one quote and implied NSFW (minor/small amount)
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Barnacles walking into the kitchen and seeing all of their pineapples* peeled: Kwazii, what in the ever loving H-E-L-L?
Kwazii, drinking water as he didn't spend hours peeling pineapples: Morning! :3
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Kwazii: Alright, I'm going to pick up the wedding cake
Barnacles: Perfect, while you do that I'll go talk to the ring bear
Kwazii: Ay-
Kwazii: Wait-
Kwazii: You mean ring bearER, right??
Barnacles: Ummm...
Orson and Ursa in the other room: OwO
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Kwazii: So, I heard you like cats?
Barnacles: Why yes, I do!
Kwazii: *calmly twists their body in a way only cats can*
Barnacles, scared and shocked: *aggressively sounds octo alert*
Barnacles: Peso...
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Barnacles: Danger never rests, we must remain vigilant
Kawaii: You haven't slept in almost a week please-
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Kwazii and Barnacles during The Carrier Crab + Sea Urchin episode:
Barnacles: Well, this is getting both embarrassing and concerning...
Kwazii: GETTING? It's been since we answered the door!
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Barnacles: Kwazii, isn't this a bit... too dangerous??
Kwazii: Captain, please! We've been in TONS of unexpected and dangerous predicaments before! And we've always managed to get away without a scratch!
Barnacles: ...
Kwazii: Sometimes. Sometimes we get away without a scratch...
Barnacles: ',:/
Kwazii: ...
Kwazii: Ok, once... and the gup crashed on the way back...
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Kwazii: Here's a fun fact! There's a company that turns dead bodies into ocean reefs!
Barnacles:
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Kwazii and Barnacles on an Island with a volcano
Barnacles: It's very hot on this island, and there are no signs of wild life either...
Kwazii: I know! It's so hot that the mountain over there is smoking and melting!
Barnacles looking up at the "mountain:: *sees smoke and lava*
Barnacles: I don't know how you manage this-
Kwazii: Manage what?
Barnacles, already sounding an octo alert: That's a volcano Kwazii...
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Kwazii: Pardon the disturbance Captain-
Barnacles: You're laying on my desk-
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Barnacles: You got arrested for stealing a parrot?
Kawaii: It looked like Pete...
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Barnacles, swimming out of a deep hole: Hello Kwazii
Kwazii, in shock: You died?? Your oxygen ran out!!! I SAW YOU DIE-
Barnacles, calm as ever: Death is an illusion, now let's get back to the gup, my air tank is almost empty...
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**
Barnacles: What are amphetamines again?
Kwazii: Drugs that can go on land and water
Barnacles: No...
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Kwazii when they first joined the Octonauts: While I don't know much about you, I'm confident that you put yourself in danger a lot more than you should...
Barnacles: I...
Tweak from the other room: YOU'RE CORRECT!!
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Barnacles: I'm about to do something stupid...
Kwazii: Me?
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Barnacles: *cracks his knuckles*
Kwazii: Hey, check this out!
Kwazii: *folds*
Barnacles: Wha-
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Kwazii: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus
Barnacles: WHERE do you keep getting these facts?
Kawaii: Shellington :)
•─────✦─────•
*I asked ppl for a random fruit and one said Pineapple
Sorry for this taking so long ^^ Schools been beating my ass lol
Requests are still open ^^
Incorrect Octonauts Quotes but I've been gone for a while and am getting back into the swing of things using dumb things I've done/witnessed
Tw/Cw for swearing, flexibly but described weirdly, and a lot of capital letters at the end
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Shellington: *info-dumbing about blobfish*
Random person: Um, actually, [incorrect information]
Shellington: You fucking, BITCH-
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Kwazii: Hey, check this out
Kwazii: *bends bones in every direction possible*
Peso: That... no-
Barnacles: Good job son, now put your bones back
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Dashi: So, can you fix this?
Tweak: Sure thing, here-
Tweak: *aggressively hits machine with a wrench until it works*
Tweak: New record
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Barnacles: Alright, how many gear shifts does a car have?
Kwazii, zoned out: 120mph
Barnacles: No-
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Professor Inkling: Can someone please explain what a "Himbo" is??
Dashi: *Points at Barnacles*
Dashi: That. That's a Himbo, but with extra brain cells
Barnacles: What...?
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Tweak: *is crying in their room*
Tweak: You know what? Fuck this
*Pulls out a bunch of hair dye*
Tweak: Free therapy, screw men
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Shellington: Therefore, seize the gay
Peso: Seize the gay?
Shellington: DAY! DAY! I MEANT DAY!!
Kwazii: Too late, SEIZE THE GAY!!!
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Barnacles: Please put that down
Dashi holding Shellington on her shoulders: No
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Kwazii: I MESSED UP!!
Kwazii: SO I ASKED DASHI AND TWEAK TO PICK A COLOR AND SHOWED THEM A COLOR CHART THING
Kwazii: DASHI IS COMPLETELY COLOR BLIND!!
Kwazii: TWEAK IS BLUE-YELLOW COLOR BLIND!!
Kwazii: AND I SHOWED THEM A COLOR CHART
•─────✧─────•
So I'm slowly coming back ^^;
I apologize for the long silence, I've been busy/stressed lol
More Incorrect Octonauts Quotes: Peso Addition Tw for swearing
_________________________ Peso: Shellington what happened? Shellington, hiding in the corner of his room: Kwazii
_________________________ Peso: Captain are you ok? I heard a loud bang come from here Barnacles: No worries Peso, nothing I can't handle! Peso: Then why is your leg stuck under your anchor? Barnacles: Barnacles: no worries I can manage- Peso: Captain please- _________________________ Shellington: Peso, when was the last time you sleep? Peso: When was the last time YOU slept? Shellington: Shellington: I will get Kwazii or Tweak to throw you across the room now answer the question- _________________________ Kwazii telling Peso a scary story: And then, they were never seen again! Peso, shaking: So that thing just came from behind and, and... took them? Kwazii: Aye, and some say that they are still wandering around to this day, searching for more prey~ Peso: Oh no- Barnacles coming from behind: Peso! Kw- Peso: *turns fast and punches Barnacles in the stomach* Barnacles, doubled over on the ground: *strained* I didn't think you could hit that hard- Peso, now panicked: CAPTAIN I'M SORRY- Kwazii, shocked: Well damn- _________________________ Dashi: Peso, I need some information on this illness, apparently it's very rare Peso: Do you know the name? Does it have a name yet? Dashi: Yes, it does, it's called Ligma! Tweak, already laughing: oh no- Peso: Ligma? Can you describe the symp- Dashi: LIGMA BAL- _________________________ Peso: Can you tell me what happened? Tweak, completely stuck in a dryer (ones that face upwards, not out): No I can not. _________________________ Professor Inkling: Peso, come quickly! Peso running down the hall: What happened Professor? Professor Inkling, completely calm: The Vegamals made you a gift! Peso: Really? They didn't have to- Vegamals: *are holding up one of those oddly detailed butt cakes* Professor Inkling: I... don't really understand the meaning behind the cake, but it looks very nice! Peso dying inside: yEs... vERy niCe _________________________ I am once again losing inspiration-
Who's ready for more Incorrect Octonauts stuff? Tw for swearing ^^ _________________________ Kwazii, with a look of fake horror on their face: Why would you eat a child? Shellington, eating scrambled eggs: Why wouldn't you eat a child? Peso walking into the room: I'm sorry WHAT-? _________________________ Tweak, playing genshin impact: Why are there always so many slimes near Dawn Winery? Dashi, having read that story: oh fuck _________________________ Peso: I spent hell knows how many years in medical school, but never once have you failed to amaze me. Kwazii, somehow tangled in a giant rubber band: I try _________________________ Captain Barnacles: Please don't piss on the jellyfish.
_________________________
Professor Inkling, watching the Vegamals get into an argument: I have no clue what's happening, but I'm betting $30 on Turnip Shellington, in shock: You can't do that! Professor Inkling: Watch me. _________________________
More Incorrect Octonauts Quotes but everyone is struggling
(Also, I do take incorrect quote + headcanon/scenario requests!!! I do Individual, shipping*, and more** ^^)
[*yes that includes poly ships, rarepairs, and more, as long as they aren't illegal/abusive/toxic]
[**if I don't know the character I'll do some research on them, but I can't promise it will be 100% accurate]
•─────✧─────•
Professor Inkling: Alright, this is a fairly simple question, I just need your honest answer
Dashi, who's only slept an hour: sure
Professor Inkling: What were you doing last night that lead to you only getting an hour of sleep?
Dashi, who spent the entire night editing photos/videos and texting Tweak: • - •,
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Shellington: *face down on his desk*
Barnacles: Is he dead?
Peso: maybe
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Tweak: As you can see, the average amount of gup crashes has gone down this month!
Barnacles: Really? That's amazing! What caused it?
Tweak: Well Shellington hasn't driven any of the gups alone
Shellington: I'm not that reckless!
Tweak: Why don't we ask the Gup D what they think?
Shellington: ...
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Kwazii: I think I'm falling for you
Shellington, still oblivious: Then get up. Here I'll help you-
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What's up I'm burnt out and running out of ideas have a bunch of incorrect quotes while I struggle to write a character I don't know
Tw/Cw for light swearing, transphobia (in one quote) [will be indicated with ** ]
•─────✧─────•
Peso: Care to explain what happened this time?
Kwazii, who is being carried by Barnacles: Yesn't
Barnacles, concerned and confused: He just... flopped?
Peso: Flopped?
Barnacles: Flopped
Kwazii: Haa no bones day
Peso, panicking: what do you mean no bones day-
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Dashi holding onto her desk/station: Who taught Kwazii how to drive?
Kwazii yelling from the manual steering wheel: NO ONE!!! HAAAHAAAA!!!
*flips the Octopod*
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Shellington: In running some tests on the saliva found on the bottle, I was able to find who exactly drank from it!!
Professor Inkling, concerned: That's excellent, but... why??
Shellington, vibrating: no one drinks my chocolate milk-
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Barnacles: *lifts 400lbs without struggling*
Barnacles: See? Pretty easy!
Peso: Yes... easy...
Kwazii: HELL YEAH IT'S EASY!!!
Kwazii: *tries to lift a 200lb weight*
Kwaziis joints: *soft cracking sounds*
Peso:
Peso: ,':|
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Calico Jack: This is my grandson, Kwazii!!
Some transphobic ass: Isn't her name-
Calico Jack, grabbing their shirt collar with his hook: I said, this is my GRANDSON, Kwazii :)
Kwazii: :)
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Tweak, kicking in a door: I HAVE ARRIVED!!!
Barnacles, who is used to this: Hello Tweak
•─────✧─────•
I apologize for not posting in a while. I lost motivation big time, and am still trying to figure out how to write a character for one of my asks ^^'
Incorrect Octonauts Quotes :)
Tw for swearing
_________________________
Tweak: This button is to launch the seagull!
Kwazii: What the "launch the seagull" button do?
Tweak:
Tweak: What the hell do you think it does-
_________________________
Professor Inkling: Did you know that flowers are the genitals of plants?
Dashi: Wait-
Shellington: And bees gather the pollen from plants for cross pollinate, essentially taking a part of the plants genetic material to assist other plants in fertilization and staying healthy! They also-
_________________________
Kwazii over the radio: I fucked up big time guys
Tweak: Did you crash the gup?
Peso: again-
Barnacles: Are you trapped or lost?
Peso: again-
Shellington: Did you get attacked by anything?
Peso: again-
Dashi: Did you get arrested?
Peso: again-
Professor Inkling: Peso, why do you keep saying "again" to everything we list off?
Peso: It's Kwazii we're talking about. The only people here who are as accident prone as them are Captain and Shellington.
Barnacles: Wait Kwazii you've been arrested before?
Kwazii: This isn't about me-
Peso: You called us saying you fucked up big time?
Kwazii:
Kwazii: Well I didn't get arrested if that's what you're asking-
_________________________
That one shark: breakfast is served (՞ټ՞)
Barnacles ready to grab on to the sharks face: Oh really?
Peso, exhausted: not again-
_________________________
Peso: What are you allergic to?
Shellington:
Peso: ',: >
Shellington: ...
Shellington: Sea Urchins-
_________________________
Incorrect Octonauts Quotes but it starts semi canon and gets more chaotic as it goes
Tw for swearing, mention of fire, Kwazii wanting to fight a God
_________________________
Barnacles: Now look, I know I'm not that good at asking for help-
Kwazii: You've almost drowned. Several times
Tweak: And almost got crushed. Several times
Peso: You've been stung the most out of all of us
Dashi: I have video of you getting attacked by am octopus and Shellington trying to pry it off of you
Shellington: You are the living embodiment of that dog in a room filled with fire
Barnacles: OK, I get it-
Professor Inkling: No you don't.
_________________________
Tweak, looking at her screwdriver: How did you manage to break this?
Kwazii: I missed the screw
Tweak: HOW DID YOU MISS THE SCREW-
Kwazii: I'M LITERALLY WEARING AN EYEPATCH-
_________________________
Professor Inkling: So, how did this happen again?
Kwazii: there was a spider.
Peso: So you grabbed a lighter and febreeze?!
Kwazii: there was a SPIDER.
Shellington: You could have used a cup and paper? Or called Captain!
Kawzii: Captain, back me up!
Barnacles: To be fair that was a giant ass spider, fire was the only way-
Peso: A COUCH WAS SET ON FIRE!
Kwazii: AND SO WAS THE SPIDER! >:/
Professor Inkling: Ehh, good enough reason
_________________________
Tweak: Why is Kwazii screaming?
Barnacles: Why wouldn't Kwazii be screaming?
Shellington: If you were smart you'd be doing the same thing
Kwazii in the background: I'M GOING TO FUCKING FIGHT A GOD AND WIN!
Peso: Shouldn't we stop him?
Tweak: No, I'll get Dashi, we need to record this.
Peso: wHY ARE WE RECORDING THIS?
_________________________
Literally anyone: Shellington go to sleep.
Shellington: Tell that to the 5 hour energy I drank 5 minutes ago- *passes out on table*
Incorrect Octonauts Quotes but everyone is neurodivergent because yes, it's canon
Please note i wrote all of this at school. I'm pretty much brain dead
Tw/Cw for general angst, mentions of overstimulation, etc
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Barnacles: *is overstimulated*
Kwazii: *gently throws giant polar bear squishmallow at him*
Barnacles: E
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One of Pesos siblings: My big brother told me you're really strong!! How strong are you?
Barnacles: Well-
Kwazii running at Barnacles full speed from behind: showtime
Kwazii: *jumps on Barnacles from behind, nearly knocking him to the ground*
Kwazii: THIS STRONG!
Barnacles, confused: I, um, ye- yes...!
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Dashi: Smile!
Everyone else: *smiles kind of normally*
Shellington and Barnacles: *does the "wait how to I smile" thing*
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Shellington: *is aggressively talking about a sea creature out of sheer excitement*
Barnacles: *gives a random fact about said creature*
Shellington: :0
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Barnacles pointing at Kwazii and Shellington: Friend
Kwazii pointing at Barnacles and Shellington: Friend
Shellington pointing at Barnacles and Kwazii: Friend
Dashi: What are they doing?
Tweak, who's used to this: No worries, it's just something they do
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Peso: *zones out staring at a wall*
Kwazii: *joins*
Shellington: *joins*
Tweak: *joins*
Barnacles: *joins*
Dashi just walking by: Is it a good wall???
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Shellington and Barnacles: *are mirroring stims*
Kwazii: Oh hey let me get in on that-
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Tweak: *is hyperfocused on a project*
Dashi: Hey, I brought you some food
Tweak: Thanks
Tweak: *accidentally bites a screwdriver*
Dashi:
Tweak:
Dashi: I'm pretty sure that's not edible-
Tweak: I knew that
•─────✧─────•
Not editing this because I'm insanely tired and stuff but want to get content out
I'll get to any requests I have in a bit, just trying to get back into it
Requests are still open :)
Guess who's back after 15 years of radio silence? This person >:)
I'll be getting to requests soon, so in the mean time have some Incorrect Octonauts Quotes ^^
+ some random headcanons
•─────✧─────•
Barnacles: So, explain how this works?
Tweak: Kwazii?
Kwazii: Yes?
Tweak: Please explain Pokémon to the Captain
Kwazii, who has the entire Pokémon Rap memorized: *deep inhale*
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Peso: Ok, just, hold still for a moment...
Tweak: Got it.
Tweak:
Tweak: *starts vibrating due to too much energy + staying still*
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Shellington: *doing the raptor arm thing*
Random person: Is... is he OK? Did he have a stroke or something?
Dashi, trying not to laugh: Na, they're just like that
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Professor Inkling: I met Captain Barnacles while teaching a class on Marine Biology. How did you meet him?
Professor Natquik: I threw a snowball and it hit him dead in the face
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Tweak: So yeah, that's how I chose my name. How about you?
Tracker: ...
Tracker: I like tracking things down...
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Dashi: Ok, now you just have to stand still and balance! Balance is key when on a surfboard
Kwazii: Pff, easy!
Kwazii: *tail starts swaying due to focus and touches the water*
Kwazii: YAAAA- *falls in*
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Peso: Here, have a sticker!
Kwazii: This is a cat sticker saying "purr-fect"...
Peso: Oh, sorry, I'll give you a new one-
Kwazii, aggressive sticking it on their hat: No I love it and I'll keep it forever
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*
Shellington: Hold on, I think I have something for this...
Dashi: What is it?
Shellington: *pulls a giant box filled with lab equipment from his bag*
Dashi:
Dashi: How tf did that fit in that tiny bag...
•─────✧─────•
* Credit to something @manilovewomen pointed out in a post they made about how Octonauts characters just pull things out of no where/pull things from bags that shouldn't fit ^^
Imagine Tracker and Paani on a Mission, what would their friendship be like?
yes yes Yes YEs YES YES YESSSS!!!
Both are super smart and incredibly skilled at what they do, and they have a good amount of field experience. They would probably work well together ^^
Tracker is a pretty grounded while Paani is more out there (and kinda chaotic), so it would be like this almost:
OR, ALTERNATIVELY, if Paani managed to influence Tracker:
Yes, Tracker is pretty reserved and shy, but if they are anything like me, once they meet that person they are out. One of the most chaotically polite people you'll meet. Then you have the enabler who also knows how to reel both of them back? Best Duo Ever.
Paani is super friendly too, so I feel like the connection would form pretty fast ^^
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I can totally see a mission going like this:
Tracker: Ok, so it says here that in order to-
Paani: *is already running off*
-
Paani: Come on! It's amazing out here!
Tracker, a Polar Bear in the middle of the desert: it's WHAT?
-
Tracker: Feel that crisp air!
Paani, a Macaque Monkey who is in the Antarctic: I can't even feel my face...
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They zone our so often it's scary, you'll just seem them staring down a wall like it owes them money like:
° - °
• - •
Also Paani is way shorter, I will stand by this headcanon. 5'2 Paani vs 6'3 Tracker
Paani would just jump tackle Tracker for fun. Out of now where, Tracker can just be standing there and then BOOM, Paani.
Tracker walks super quietly, which leads to them scaring Paani almost every mission they are on.
They would casually fight over directions while somehow going the right way regardless, one is yelling "We go South!", the other is yelling "No, East!", while walking North and they still make it somehow.
ACCIDENT PRONE!!! BOTH OF THEM!! What's that? There's a hole there? They would walk into that hole, one after the other, even if they saw the other fall first.
Tracker has no depth perception, Paani took it all.
Tracker just has a lot of bad luck, such as random things falling on or around them. The bad luck rubs off of Paani whenever they work together, which may or may not have led to Paani getting hit with their rod a few times-
They both have such dumb but smart ideas. The ideas are amazing and can seriously help people and creatures, but the way the phrase it is so out there-
-
Autism (Tracker) and ADHD (Paani) Solidarity
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Just those people who you'd look at and think "they'd never get along", but they get along so well it's scary. And they're both enablers to each others antics, mainly Paani, but Tracker does it more often than you'd think.
Some bros being dudes :)
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Some images I have that fit their friendship vibe:
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Sorry for this being so messy and all over the place, my brain hasn't been working well for a little bit and I'm sure the writing here reflects that ^^;
•He/Him - 19• ••Main account (Octonauts) | I make art (patches, writing, etc) and shitpost••
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