Man I Love Being Both Autistic And Adhd At The Same Time. Can’t Focus On Just One Thing I Gotta Collect

I know this is a writing prompt type deal but like why you have to call me out like this lol

"Can’t you see what they’re doing to you?!"

His voice begins to crack as the words leave his mouth. Tears spill over, his hands trembling. "So what was I supposed to do then?! Everyone left me—I had no one! I was alone!" He looks up, eyes burning with anger and hurt.

"You could’ve come to me."

"You don’t think I did?!"

For real. I really should give some of those things a try, but I haven’t done any of them in so hecking long that I have a hard time remembering what they were sometimes

One thing that sucks about being autistic, especially if you're prone to masking, is that you forget certain joys specific to you. You spend so much time pursuing what others think you'll enjoy that you forget things that scratch itches only autistic people have. I just rediscovered my love of writing out lyrics to my favourite songs. I don't think it's something I can explain to neurotypicals but it's such a simple, easy joy.

Oh shush it gets even better. This weekend’s been extra lonely because of the holiday, and as we speak she’s trying to cheer me up and let me talk about what’s going on. As if she ain’t the one person I want to tell everything but can’t because it’s her and if I do I risk pushing her away and that’s exactly the opposite of what I want. She’s literally just so kind and pretty and goodness gracious my heart

"Have you been avoiding me?"

"What?! Me? Nah… it's not like i, uh, caught feeling for you and now I'm having literally the worst existential crisis ever" starts hyperventilating "what reason could i possibly have to avoid YoU" chuckles awkwardly while trying to catch his breath

Okay. Quick update. It’s been like two weeks (SORRY!) and I still haven’t shared about the good news that I had. I think maybe 2 of my followers are actually invested in this?? Possibly 3??? Anyway, moving on.

Unfortunately, I still don’t know how exactly to share it or how much I can share. BUT I can share that I’ve made some really good friends at a campus event my college had several weeks ago! And because of this event, I met an extremely awesome human being.

I want to be very clear in that I am not in a relationship in any way, but I really like this amazing human being so we’ll have to see what happens when the next semester starts. However I don’t wanna cross any boundaries that I don’t know about so that’s all I want, and am going, to say about the matter.

OH! And another very important piece of information unrelated to said events is that the other friends I made are frigging hilarious. Love having lots of friends that are fun to be around lol. Mario Kart has never been so chaotically fun

NINE SOLS SPOILERS BELOW!! They’re minor non-story spoilers, but I said I’d put a warning anyway, so turn away if you don’t want to deal with it

General Yingzhao flipping sucks coming off a long break of combat games. He’s literally the first real boss of the game and because I haven’t played a video game where parrying is a REQUIRED mechanic in almost three years my skill flipping sucks and I’ve spent a cumulative two and a half hours just trying to consistently get to phase two.

I mean I get his first phase attack pattern really well but I just can’t parry consistently enough to avoid getting absolutely combo-womboed. And when I get comboed I get flipping COMBOED and there’s just nothing I can do but take it.

I “don’t” (I actually do) look forward to the next bosses of the game because I just want my parrying ability to not suck for once lol.

This lowkey sounds angry but I genuinely am so excited for the rest of the game once I can get to it. And it’s purely because this is the first game in a long while where I’ve actually enjoyed how stinking difficult the game is. The story is still confusing for now but I’m just here for the ride with my boy Yi.

Here’s a really rough 20 minute sketch of a mountain (don’t mention the shading ik it’s bad)

I saw it and figured why not sketch it out since I had my sketchbook with me for once lol

(My bad lol I was going for a lack of tact because people don’t know how to communicate properly sometimes. I’ll make my next one more lighthearted frfr)

"Actually… i think i fell in love with you…"

"Damn man, i wish i could help you out fr. Goodluck on your problem tho"

The holidays are mega weird when you’re depressed. Like this Christmas season has just felt so empty and it’s not for a lack of reasons to celebrate. I’m just getting older and my brain hates existing so it just doesn’t feel the same way that I have about the holiday season in the past

Liar Liar (Wasteland Monarchy) by Kamelot.

I listen to music as a shower timer and it played so now it’s in my head.

ATTENTION

If you see this you are OBLIGATED to reblog w/ the song currently stuck in your head :)

Too real lol

venting is only annoying when i do it btw. everybody else is innocent and free of sin