When You Reopen Asks Can You Do The Ages Of The Slenderbrothers Pls :D

Spiders are not insects, they're arachnids. But that is a very beautiful latrodectus tredecimguttatus nonetheless. Did you take the picture yourself? I have to admit the picture has a rather good quality! 🕷️❤️

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S-...so splendor has a praise kink right? So do you think his other brothers would have fav kinks & maybe a fav s3x position(s) to?😳

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Of course they do! Putting this one under a cut.

C.W. Descriptions of sex. Minors DNI

Slenderman Headcanons: Sex & The Slender Brothers

Note: I also recommend reading the post: Slenderman Headcanon: Lovemaking 

Slenderman

Slender loves using his tendrils during sex. While you can expect gentle exploration, teasing and even some penetration with his tendrils, his favorite use for them is for bondage purposes. Nothing too crazy, but he especially likes holding his partners up with his tendrils as well as using the extra appendages to bind their hands or stuff their mouths.  

I don’t think Slender is aware of it himself but he has a thing for having sex while standing. Standing over someone as he rails them just does it for him and gives him a comforting sense of control. He can do the ‘horizontal tango’ but only with someone he trusts and when he’s feeling particularly intimate.  

Small amounts of pain during sex is also something he enjoys. Small nicks and scrapes from sharper teeth get him worked up and if he hasn’t bound your hands and trusts you enough then the feeling of claws scraping against his skin is lovely. 

Offenderman

Are you really going to do this to him? Make him pick a favorite kink and sex position? It’s like asking a parent their favorite child or a drowning man his favorite flavor of air. 

All sex is good sex.

Well, all sex is good sex so long as you’re not pounding him in the ass. He’s tried it (a lot) and unfortunately it just doesn’t do it for him. 

Trenderman

He wants to be all up in your business. No matter if he’s topping or bottoming, he wants to be in a position where he can feel as much of his partner as possible. 

Whether this means chest-to-chest, chest-to-back or anything else, he wants to be absolutely crushed against his partner.  

He wants to be doted on in his sexual encounters and this includes receiving extensive foreplay. He’s still very touchy during foreplay, whether it’s wrapping his legs or arms around his partner or just placing his hands on them. 

He also loves inflicting pain during sex. He’s mindful not to do anything that could cause permanent damage or put off his partners too much, so often it’s just scraping his claws down their back or grazing their skin with his teeth. However, if given the chance he would do a lot more. 

Splendorman

As previously stated he has a praise kink. 

He doesn’t have much experience with sex so I doubt even he knows his favorite positions but he’s definitely open to experimenting. He gets a lot of sexual enjoyment from pleasing his partner so I could imagine that his favorite position changes depending on the partner he’s with.   

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Thanks so much for the ask!

Imagine request: Jeff and Toby finding out and taking care of their pregnant S/O? Would they want to keep the child or adoption? Thank you!!

Jeff faces a moral dilemma and Toby is excited for fatherhood.

Jeff

Oh, no.

Noononono.

Jeff doesn’t want kids, probably ever.

He hates the little gremlins and will go out of his way to scare them.

He does have a small soft spot for them if they don’t run away screaming.

But he wouldn’t want a kid of his own, just for them to turn out like him in the future.

He’ll make it clear to his s/o that he won’t be able to commit to raising a kid.

But he’ll do what he can in the meantime to make it up to them.

Because it’s kind of his fault in the first place y'know.

He’ll do what he can, and he’ll go out of his way to satisfy her weird cravings for now.

He’ll try to be sympathetic for once, but he’ll be on edge for the next 9 months with the weight of giving up his own blood to someone else.

Try not to ask too much of him, he can get a little rough-edged when facing stress like this and he’ll say things he doesn’t really mean.

He’ll mostly stay to himself in a mental debate if he really wants to give up the kid or not.

He’ll be so wound up in himself, he’ll forget to cater to his pregnant so, and will become aggravated if they ask for something.

Toby

Toby has ALWAYS wanted a family.

He’s always wanted to capture a little bit of normalness through his conditions.

The thought of a perfect family, a perfect job, perfect life was always ideal to him. He’s always found himself daydreaming about it on frequent occasions.

So when he hears his s/o is pregnant he’s ecstatic.

And constantly asks if you’re being serious.

“AaAaAAA Oh My GOd-, wait for real?”

“Yes.”

“AahaHHHh-”

Toby will 100% want to keep the child.

He’s not going to be the most cautious of fathers, but he’ll always love and cherish his kid.

Toby never had a great father growing up, so he wants his kid to experience that.

The only downside is that instead of saying you’re pregnant, he calls it “baking” or “cooking”.

So, while the baby is cooking, he’ll pamper and spoil you.

He’ll buy you all of this pregnant stuff he saw on amazon and weird ads that follow him around the internet.

When you’re asleep, he’ll lay his head on your tummy and whisper to the baby.

But he’ll end up waking you up because he gets too touchy with your preggo tummy.

He’ll do his best to satisfy your weird cravings in the middle of the night, and hope that his child won’t have the same tastebuds as his s/o.

But I though he was a(n army) doctor, not a vet? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍😅😉😏😋☺️🤭😁🙂😐😑😌👀💯👉🏻👈🏻

I was able to apprehend the suspect. I am transporting the suspect home, so you can examine it, @consult-johnhwatson.

AGREED!! 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍💯😂🤣🤭😁☺️😳👀😉😋👉🏻👈🏻

thoughts on will wood? :3

smash

Can I use that for roaches as well? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍🤭😂🤣😅😁☺️😳😉😋🥳👀👉🏻👈🏻

Tumblr seems to do targeted advertisements now. Or maybe that was just a coincidence that they are providing an ad for meat seasoning right after I posted about a cannibal seasoning their meat of choice. "The taste their meat craves" They even got the garlic I just talked about. Very fitting. Meat seasoning for cannibals. How neat. At least we now know the perfect christmas present for any cannibalistic friend you have.

I'd love that! But why do you seem to want to keep me away from @criminalisticonsultant??? 🕷️❤️😘🥰😍☺️🤤😉😋😁😌😅😳👀🥺🥹👉🏻👈🏻

Speaking of whiskey...

...You still have the one I imported?

NSFW Christmas headcannons? Love you Jas!

(Creepypasta x Headcanon) NSFW Christmas Headcanons -

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Aw, I love you too <3 

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- Jeff and BEN makes a whole tray of d*ck shaped cookies, despite what Slender says about it, then they laugh whenever someone eats them. smh

- Dr.Smiley likes to watch 50 Shades of Gray with some hot chocolate while everyone is asleep or gone. If anyone catches him, he’ll threaten the Pastas to keep quiet. 

- Always on Christmas day, Smile Dog and Grinny Cat go out and try to find a mate. Their way of mating is not a pretty sight. Jeff once walked into a room with Smile Dog with another poor dog, he wishes he could unsee everything. 

- A few years ago on Christmas Eve, Sexual Offender put rose petals on Slender’s bed, thinking it was one of his victims, not his brother. Slenderman still doesn’t understand how Offender didn’t realize. 

- Toby, Jeff, BEN, & Laughing Jack always try to embarrass each other on Christmas Day with NSFW stuff. Who can get the most embarrassing dirty gift? Who can say the most embarrassing dirty thing to Slenderman without chickening out? It drives everyone up the wall, but it’s fun to hear what they have to say.

Well, then I think it's time for you to deduce and find out! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘😄😁😆😉😌☺️🤣😂💯👀👉🏻👈🏻

... I can't even send a gif? Boooring!

Fascinating that you have been testing it.

Are you bored or are you jealous of the new case I'm working on?

I've been able to successfully let her go back into the wild. Or better phrased yet, she decided it was time to go back to her life in the wild herself.

Of course I've hurried outside and was worried at first, but after some time I was able to watch her reconnecting with her family.

I watched her being fed by her Mom, which was cute but hit right home. I was kind of sad that she's gone now and I have no bird to care for anymore, but I was also really happy to know that Elischeba is healthy and back with her family. But I do have to admit that I still miss her a lot... 🕷️😘😍🥰😌☺️😉😁🥹🥺👉🏻👈🏻

Hi there, Mr. Holmes! What are your thoughts about arachnophilia and entomomania? *Leaves big chocolate cake for you*

Arachnophilia and entomomania? How thoroughly... intriguing. The love of spiders and the fear of insects. I suppose everyone needs a lexicon hobby.

Without proper context, I'm afraid I don't have any interesting thoughts on them.

As for the cake, your offering is duly noted. I trust it is dark chocolate?