That Means I Get To Bully The Pink Toad Called UmBITCH!

//I'm alive!!! Sorry this took so long, anon!!! Likes, reblogs and comments are very appreciated!//

tw: smut

Aziraphale:

Praise Kink: You better believe that this angel has a praise kink. He loves this kink, both giving and receiving, but he absolutely loves to enrapture you with compliment after compliment while pleasuring you. He'll fuck you gently while whispering praises in your ear. Praises about how beautiful you look underneath him, how cute your soft moans are, how you mean the world to him, etc.

Bondage: He likes to tie you up but not in a BDSM sort of way. He won't use ropes but instead uses silk ribbon to tie you down. He thinks you look more elegant that way. When he's done wrapping the ribbon around your naked body, he'll coo at you and say, "Look at you, my sweet... You look like a present that's waiting to be unwrapped... just for me!"

Edgeplay: This is his way of punishing you when you're being naughty. This form of punishment will go hand-in-hand with his bondage kink. While you're tied up, looking all cute and helpless, he'll edge you over and over until you're sobbing and begging for release. He'll edge you using his fingers or maybe his tongue, but his favorite way to edge you is by using a vibrator because it makes you more desperate for his touch.

Petplay: He probably won't ever admit it out loud but he has a thing for the master/pet dynamic. He'd have you wear a cute headband with fuzzy cat ears attached. He also loves to picture you in a pretty pastel colored collar with a leash attached. Will definitely call you his "pet" or his "pretty kitty."

Thigh-Highs: I headcanon Aziraphale as someone who really likes thighs. To squeeze them, kiss them, nip at them, it doesn't matter. If he were to come home to you lying on your shared bed, waiting for him in nothing but thigh-highs, expect him to be between your legs for hours worshipping you.

Tags: @aethersghoulette @crowleys-poppet-queen-of-assgard @rosefairyirl @duchessvonfingerbang @care-a-lot-comfort @imkloeyjarvis

Body worship headcanons for Soma and Agni, please 🙏 thank you, thank you, thank you!

Alrighty!

Prince Soma:

Is definitely the type who would prefer receiving praises than giving them, partly because he doesn’t think he’s good at it, partly because he simply enjoys being spoiled. It doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t try it the other way around, on the contrary—if his lover would ever shower him with affection during sex, he would want to repay her equally.

Once you would move your kisses from his lips down his neck and then chest, he would melt under your touch. Draw your fingers down his sides, feel his ribs rising when he inhales deeply and arches his back just to show you how much he’s enjoying it, longing for you. Kiss his skin, lick it, bite it, whisper sweet nothings against it and he would turn into a mess, squirming on the velvet sheets and pleading you to never stop.

Tell him he’s a good boy.

Additionally, it would be very hard to not worship the prince, considering the way he might sometimes dress up for the passionate night with you. The scent of incenses, the bright coloured sheets, the dim light of the candles and him, dressed in thin, golden jewelry decorating his neck and waist and arms and ankles. His skin would smell of various body oils and perfume—intense but fitting him perfectly. Delicious.

He would love it if you took your time with him, praising him and his body. It would be a shame to finish the fun so quickly, since the night was so young, after all. The thing which would make him no less excited but definitely more flustered is if you repeated that you love him. Say it over and over again while slowly massaging the inner sides of his thighs and he would start stuttering when trying to say the same to you.

Agni:

Surprisingly or not, worshipping your body comes naturally to Agni, whether you would mention wanting to try it out or not. There was not a single time when he wouldn’t be worshipping you—caressing your body, stroking it in just the perfect ways and looking at you with such an endless amount of love that you would feel completely naked underneath him, if you weren’t already bare.

The very idea of having you in his bed is enough to make Agni’s cheeks warm and when it would happen, he would definitely want it to be as wonderful as possible. He would give you compliments, comment on those parts of the body you might not find particularly attractive (and with some undisclosed poetic skill cherish them with the sweetest words) and use his fingers to perform real magic upon your skin.

That is, because Agni has a great knowledge about bodies in general and so, no soft points would slip past his attention. He would find them all, touch them, massage, knead and leave open-mouthed kisses on them. None of your insecurities will be safe while Agni is on his watch!

He would literally show you things you had no idea were that pleasant, for example (if you were willing and allowed it, of course) he might give you the most relaxing feet massage. Then, he would move up to your calves and higher to the thigs, making sure that all your muscles are not tensed anymore.

His fingers are truly magical.

Once Agni would finally taste you, he wouldn’t let you go that easily. Watching your expression change during orgasm would be equal to the enormous wave of love for you drowning him yet once again—and he would be intoxicated by it. He would want to see you do it again and again, each time admiring how responsive you are and not being afraid to mention it from time to time. Agni would casually eat you up for the hours straight and end up with an honestly innocent stating that you taste delicious and he wants you to squeeze his tongue like that again.

Unintentionally he might cross the line of dirty talking but wouldn’t notice it until you told him. Then, he would get all flustered and become quiet.

It's a figure of speech, sweetie, I just wanted you to know that I'm ready to listen to whatever you're about to explain! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍🥺🥹☺️😉😁😌🤣😂👉🏻👈🏻

Does your broken butt fell better today, Sherly? 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍🥺🥹😭😳🥲😅☺️😉😁😌😂🤣👉🏻👈🏻

My posterior is not broken. The majority of it consists of muscles like the gluteus maximus, which you can't really break.

Concerning my bruised non-injured coccyx and sacrum, I might have palpated them when if I had fallen on them. And the theoretical palpation showed no broken or moving parts. No x-ray necessary given that a broken coccyx can't be treated with a cast anyway given you can't immobilise the bone properly.

But of course such a theoretical injury takes some days to heal and several impact points on legs and arms have bruises when you fall down the stairs. Hematoma usually take a few weeks to heal, as well as the pain to lessen. All theoretical, of course.

Happy Valentine's Day, by the way! To you and to @thedetectivefrom221b!! 🕷️❤️🥰😍😘😄😁😆😉☺️😌👉🏻👈🏻

... I can't even send a gif? Boooring!

Fascinating that you have been testing it.

Are you bored or are you jealous of the new case I'm working on?

Stingy flies! Yummy! Also I can't wait to keep learning from you how to deduce things! And thanks for the infos, they're not only needed but also moch appreciated! You really have no idea how much I've missed you, along with everyone else. The only thing left that I really miss is my old username, so yes, I do agree with you on the matter that the old username was better. 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😉😁🥺🥹😭😇😳😋🥳

Hey there Sherlock! I'm back! I hope you've been well and I hope you still keep up those awesome, braincell-revieving, scientific explainations about stuff like insects or arachnids like myself! 🕷️🥰😘😍❤️☺️😌😋🥳😉😁🥺🥹😳😭

I had noted your absence, and wondered where my second favourite arachnid had gone (the title of favourite arachnid still goes to @criminalisticonsultant, apologies). So your return is much appreciated. Welcome back, I had missed your questions and comments. But I will miss your old name, @shame-of-chimical. Reminiscent of better times. However, there have been some major changes during your absence. If you want to know more about it, I would advise you to read this post, some further information here, and if you have any more questions please direct them to my consulting assistant @veritassempervincit. But I do have some insects for you, as I have been bee watching last weekend.

87 + 107? with mycroft? please?

Pairing: Mycroft Holmes x ReaderFandom: BBC SherlockWarnings: /Genre: fluff ; humor

Summary: “My family wants to meet you.” + “What are you smiling for?”

A/N: thank you my love (added mycroft to my fandoms page) (NO MORE PLEASE, ONLY FINISHING THOSE IN MY INBOX)

                                                        *****

Youlooked up from the file in front of you, when the door to your officegot opened and smiled at Mycroft, “Well, well.. to what do I owethe pleasure?”

“Areyou busy?”

“No more than usual,” you leaned back in your chair and watched himtake a seat across from you, “What is it?”

Mycroftlooked nervous. And that wasn’t something you were used to and itmade you nervous as well.

“Rememberhow we discussed not making our relationship public, due to workrelated issues and also my family?”

“Yes?”

“Sherlockhas found out about it.”

Youdrew your eyebrows together, but were still calm, “How?”

“Ithink he might have gone through my phone the last time he was here.Anyways, when we were at my parents’ place last weekend, he suddenlystarted talking about it. Told them everything there was to knowabout you.”

“He did what?”

Weiterlesen

LEMME SMASH!! >:3

It recently came to my attention that there is a production crew doodle of frollo in what appears to be a maid dress so obviously I had to put my art block aside and redraw it

Fucking whatever I guess

Hello. Can you do boyfriend scenarios with Ronald knox (from kuroshitsuji / Black Butler). Like how he takes care of his s/o, and how he acts with them.

Wow, it’s been so long since I’ve done anything on this blog, man. And since this is more like headcanons I hope you don’t mind that’s what I’m doing.

Ronald Knox 

He’d love taking care of you, especially when you’re sick. He’d be all giggly and super loving, but also kind of a dick. He’d definitely tease you about getting ill so easily.

He’s an even bigger goofball when you’re around, because then it’s easier for him to love and hug up on you. He’s joking and very playful.

Usually he’s very energetic and sarcastic around you, but when he’s around others he’s very overprotective.

When his glasses are off, his hearing is heightened and when he sleeps next to you he likes to listen to your breathing.

He likes surprise kisses.

...Now I really wanna sniff an ahpeloria virginiensis. Thanks. Are there any such awesome awesome critters running around in Germany somewhere by any change? I know that it's being said that theraposidae like the phoneutria and lycosidae like the sparrasidae appearantly wandered to Germany. But so far, I had no luck finding one unfortunately.

do millipedes spray cyanide? i relocated a couple while cleaning my yard and now i'm mildly concerned

the millipedes that release hydrogen cyanide release it as a gas. these include various flat-back millipedes, although there’s plenty of flat-backs that just use a benzoquinone-based fluid defense chemical, which is what many other common millipedes produce (including the round-backed juliforms one often finds in the yard). in either case, you’d need to swallow a millipede for it to do you any great harm.

Apheloria virginiensis is one local to me, and I am guilty of picking them up when on walks in the woods to smell the cyanide: it’s a fragrant scent of almonds or cherries.

cyanide-producing millipedes, since their defense chemical is gaseous, really can’t hurt you unless you’ve already ingested the millipede or are like huffing dozens of them, which would both be probably be actions deserving of consequences.

other millipedes’ liquid chemicals usually just smell foul, like burning rubber. most millipedes under 3-4 cm aren’t going to pack much of a toxic punch at all. some of the larger tropical species in the Spirobolida and Spirostreptida can cause caustic burns if it isn’t washed off soon with detergent or if you have very sensitive skin. I’ve harassed plenty a Narceus and gotten some yellow, later dark purple stains on my hands, but that was the extent of it.

PDA Headcanons for Crowley & Aziraphale (gender-neutral reader)

Crowley:

Super comfortable with public displays of affection. Only if he knows you’re also comfortable with it, of course.

He likes letting other people know you’re his (and, vice versa, that he’s yours).

Touchy. VERY touchy. Like one or more of his hands are probably on you at all times.

He likes having his arm around your shoulders (bonus points if you are quite a bit shorter than him - he likes the feeling that he’s keeping you safe.)

If you’re sitting down in a public place (like a park bench, for example) do not think he won’t pull you into his lap. Because he will. All the time.

He will grab your ass in public. He will probably do it discreetly, but he does it just to make you blush and get all flustered.

Constant use of petnames. Sweetheart is his favourite.

Absolutely not ashamed to kiss you in public. Like he will do it a lot. Not just your lips either. Cheeks? Yep. Neck? Y E P. If you have skin showing, Crowley wants to have his mouth there.

More than once he has kissed you, pinned you against a wall on some discreet London corner and things got a little too heated. Cue the two of you rushing back to the Bentley to get to somewhere a little more private 👀

Aziraphale:

Definitely not as confident about PDA as Crowley, but that doesn’t mean he won’t show you any affection in public. He’s just more subtle about it.

Hand holding. Literally his favourite thing to do ever. Does that thing where he rubs little circles into your hand with his thumb !!!

If you lean your head into his arm/shoulder when you’re walking and holding hands?? This angel will straight up melt.

Also likes using petnames on you, though Aziraphale prefers the more traditional “my dear/darling”.

I mean he’s just a good old fashioned gentleman. Holds doors open for you, never lets you carry anything ever even if you insist you’re fine.

You’re cold? He’ll be wrapping his jacket around your shoulders before you can even start shivering.

Will still give you forehead kisses and probably also kiss the back of your hand because he is SOFT AF.

One day you surprise him with a kiss on the lips whilst you’re out for a stroll and he goes red and probably starts tripping over his own feet but is grinning the whole way home.