I Love Your Works :>

this is the most beautiful thing i ever seen in my life

I'm in love with Reiss Mental Asylum! Keep doin what ur doin :)💗💗

Thank you so much!!! 😭😭😭 i appreciate it a lot!

updates are soo slow and I’m sorry about that ): i hope i can get my unmotivated ass to write regularly! 😭

you hangin in there?

i am, unfortunately, still alive

Are you still working on your Attack On Titan stories? Or are they discontinued? Sorry if I’m bothering you I noticed that you’ve been posting a bit. I hope you have a nice day and take care of yourself!

hi, anon! im trying to work on reiss asylum for the moment... very slowly, but making some progress.

and don't worry! these asks are not a bother <3 thank you for reaching out and i wish i could be a more competent writer LOL. but writing hasn't come to me as it used to.

thank you and i hope you are doing well aswell!!

Flower Curse | 6

[levi x male!reader x erwin] this work will have vomiting, heavy angst and death. the reader suffers from the hanakahi disease. summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him.

f i v e

Paperwork. That was the only thing saving you from insanity. And even if paperwork was an utterly nightmare before expeditions, you really didn't mind. There was nothing to do today but finish this work, and when you weren't doing something you drowned in your misery.

How where you going to lead your squad was an enigma right now. But you strongly refused to not go to the expedition and not be present with your squad. No way were you going to let them alone— you must protect them as always, and no curse was going to stop you from your duty as a soldier. No way in hell.

Nevertheless, your health was worse this morning. The first thing you did when you woke up was throwing up the flowers inside; and all of them were full, along with blood on them. This was one of the most hurtful times you vomited— the force was so brutal; as if the flowers were tearing your throat apart. You had a hard time to breathe normally; you had to take deep breaths because you felt something covering your lungs. Your skin was way paler now, your eyes were dull and they didn't look as sparkly as before. You were a little skinnier than yesterday, consequence of your appetite being gone— you couldn't eat the breakfast Hange give you this morning. The only thing you could eat were the cookies Ziegler gifted you.

Maybe these were your last days on earth. Who knows?

Passing your hand through your hair, you let out a heavy sigh, before mumbling to yourself, "I have to take this to Erwin..."

"Yo, Erwin," you opened the door without knocking, not that the blond minded anymore. "These are finished; maybe I will give you the rest in a couple of hours." Approaching him, you placed the papers on his desk, along with all of the pile of papers that were there.

"Good job, [Name]. I wish I could say the same about finishing." Erwin stated, rubbing his temples, "I still have to talk about the strategy with everyone."

"There's nothing you can't handle, eyebrows." You reassured, making him slightly smile, "anyways, where I'm going to be placed?"

The question made the blond frown. He couldn't grasp the idea of you going to the expedition in your current condition— were you really asking that absurd question? Didn’t you notice your worsened health? or were you playing dumb?

Erwin's demeanor changed completely— his relaxed composure changed into a tensed one; the smile from earlier disappeared, leaving a thin line instead. You unconsciously tensed as well, noticing the change of air.

There was a tensed silence, before Erwin spoke again, "What gives you the idea that you are coming?" He asked, looking straight at you with those piercing blue eyes.

Blinking surprised by the sudden change, you recompose yourself and replied, a bit angry, "What do you mean by that? Of course I'm coming!"

Hearing your reply made Erwin's eyes close. The blond really hoped you were going to accept your current condition and stay behind— but he knew that wasn't going to be possible. Your stubbornness was stronger than anything.

He knew this conversation wasn't going to end well— No matter how gently he said it, so he just choose the hard and simple way.

"You are not coming by any means, [Name]. Do I have to remain your current condition?"

You clenched your teeth, "I know very well I'm dying, but this fucking shit it's no excuse to leave my squad with someone else! I'm coming with or without your stupid permission!" You weren't talking right now, you were yelling. Your joking demeanor was completely gone; both of you were glaring at each other.

"You are not coming to the expedition and that's final." He firmly stated, looking straight at you. "Your health will only complicate everything, stop your stubbornness and be an adult."

"Fuck no! I'm coming and you are not stopping me!" You sounded like a child yelling for his toy— you wanted things to go your way, but that was impossible these days.

"I'm your superior and you will obey my orders," he stood up from his seat, making himself look taller than you, "do otherwise and you will be punished."

You hopelessly looked at him. This wasn't what you needed right now— you had to go, you always did! Leaving your squad with someone else wasn't going to happen, you had to be there with them. You were dying anyways, what was the difference?

"You— You can't do this!" you breathlessly pleaded, looking at him with a mix of anger and desperation.

"I just did, Squad Leader [Name]. You are forbidden to go." Even if the two of you were hurt by these words and how the situation turned into, Erwin knew this was the right thing to do. If there was anything 'right' anymore in this world.

You just desperately looked at his icy eyes for any sign of softness, gentleness. But you only were meeting with a cold gaze, so you just tightly swallowed, glaring at him before leaving and loudly slam the door, scaring everyone who was near the office. You ignored the stares and went straight to your office.

The blond only sighed and sat down once again. He rubbed his temples just like moments prior, and tirelessly mumbled to himself,

"What are we going to do..."

Currently you were beyond furious— how dared he forbid you to go?! How dare he talk to you like that! He just couldn't not give you permission to not do something, could he?!

Well, he is the commander, so...

No! He was you friend! Friends should understand each other and not treat each other like a kid, right?

He can if you are acting as one.

Y—You weren't! ...right? You just wanted to go to the expedition, with or without his permission...

Well, yeah, you were acting a little selfish. But! You just are worried for your squad; what was going to happen to them? Instantly, your thoughts were in a deep sea of horrifying futures— images about how everything could go to hell if you weren't there.

Nevertheless, a knock on your door made you snap out of it. Asking who they were, you were greeted by one of your nightmares.

"It's Petra! Can I come in?"

"Fuck, fuck, FUCK!" You were doing a good job at avoiding the two love-birds— Petra was busy with Levi, so Levi was with her. If we ignore the conflict of yesterday, you hardly talked to them.

And just like a dejavú, you wore your mask and smiled, ignoring the weird feeling on your stomach.

"Petra! Of course, come in!"

The door opened, revealing pretty little Petra wearing a huge smile, a blush covering her cheeks. "[Name]! It’s been time! When was the last time we talked? I have a lot to say!"

"Well, when I spit flowers because of you of course I'm going to avoid you." you grimly thought, showing your fake smile and laugh. "It's been ages, right? As you can see, I'm a little busy right now, so if you can come another time..." you tried to make her away, smiling.

You were repulsed by her. Before, only warm was felt when you talked to her, looked at her— but now you wanted her to be as far as possible from you. Looking at her gentle features only made you furious. The mask wasn't going to take too long to break, it seemed,

"Wait! I've to ask you something maybe important!" she exclaimed, not leaving her smile, "and maybe, you can help me out today..."

"Can't you fucking go away?" you thought. "Tell me, what is it, Petra? It's just all of this paperwork has to be done today." your eyebrow was twitching in annoyance, but your fake smile remained.

Her face lighten up, "Thank you, [Name]!" She approached you and sat down on the chair near your desk, "I want to gift something to Levi before the expedition, but I don't know what to gift... Can you give me ideas?"

You felt a dagger across your heart, along with something rising very slowly. Gritting your teeth, you barely hide your annoyance and reply, "I don't know, Petra... It's just that I'm—"

Petra interrupted you, grabbing both of your hands. Repulsing. "Please, [Name]! You know Levi, what if we go out and see the market together? Just for a moment!"

Stop touching me.

"But, Petra... the paperwork—"

Go away.

"Come on! Help me with Levi! I want to see one of his smiles..."

Leave.

"I'm not—"

Shut up.

"Yes! Let's go right now! Please, do this for me... maybe I can even hug him today..."

CRASH.

Do this for her? Was she fucking stupid? Weren't you dying for her? But of course— she didn't know what.

Something changed inside you. You were done playing games. If everyone had to take a hint to know what was happening to you, then you should reveal your true self once for all.

The mask you wore fell and broke.

Fuck this. Fuck her, fuck him, fuck everyone! Fury consumed your mind, leaving you with nothing but repulsion and anger, and you just gave in.

"Petra, get off of me."

The sudden change in your voice made her look at you in confusion. Your voice changed to a deep one— someone she didn't hear before.

Seeing as she couldn't take a simple order, you hardly took her arm with your free hand and forced her to leave your wrist free.

The woman looked surprised and hurt by the force on her arm, she just looked at you and tried to calm you down, "[Name], is something the matter?"

Yes, you fucking idiot. I want you to leave.

"I think you should leave." You 'gently' said to her, trying to control the anger clouding your mind like fog.

But of course, she couldn't take a simple hint to leave you alone. "No, [Name]— But we have time to go to the market..." Still with her goddamn gift.

"Alright, how can I say this so you can understand..." you rubbed your temples, "Leave."

"What? Come on, [Name], stop playing games! We are wasting time!"

"Are you fucking deaf, Petra?" you glared at her, making her blink in surprise. You have never been like this before, what got into you? And before she could say something, while you could see her didn't do shit, you shouted, "GET THE FUCK OUT! LEAVE!"

But still, she didn't do shit. She just stared at you in surprise; confused and taken aback. What happened to you? The sudden outburst made her stand in shock, not believing your actions to her.

When she didn't move at all when you yelled, you just followed your emotions. Your mind was clouded and you couldn't think properly— so you just fiercely grabbed her by the collar, opened the door and throw her in the hall, making her fall on the floor with a loud noise. Everyone who was in the hall saw it; how you glare daggers at her before slamming the door, scaring everyone by the loud noise. After everyone could understand the situation they just saw, some of them helped Petra to stand, while she still stared in disbelief.

Instantly, you threw up everything. Pink flowers stained with red. Was that… a root?

You were going to be in some deep shit soon.

You honestly thought this day wasn't going to end well. It began in a bad way, and it will end in worse way. So you just waited for your executioner to appear, not caring about the paperwork or the meal time.

You just waited, and so, the devil appeared.

The door opened with a loud noise, it appeared the ravenette forced himself in; seeing his leg up when the door fiercely opened. You weren't surprised at all by his actions— you were waiting for him, after all.

"What the fuck did you do this morning?" you heard him ask, feeling the murderous glare he was giving you.

Your nerves were crazy right now; you could feel an explosion of emotions inside you. If this wasn't the day you were going to die, then surely you would by tomorrow.

"Hey, shithead, I asked you something, and you better answer me." He demanded, slowly approaching your desk like a prey. "Nobody is going to interrupt now; eyebrows is not here, four eyes isn't. So you better fucking talk or I will make you talk."

Knowing him, you better should be talking by now— he didn't make empty promises to anybody, and you knew he was holding back a little. But you were making him impatient, and you believed his patience was running out. Nevertheless, the feelings you had for him were never going to be known by him. Or at least, that was what you foolishly thought.

"I think you know everything by now, Levi." You answered, not scared by his glare or words— you didn't have the strength. And, like you imagined, your answer only made him rile up, slamming his hands on your desk.

"I want to hear it coming out of your goddamn mouth, [Name]. Stop playing your foolish games and answer me!" He practically yelled, and you just looked at him, brows furrowed.

"What do you want me to say?!" You stood up and slammed your hands on the desk just like he did, and yelled, "That I threw Petra out of here because I wanted her to leave?! That I didn't want to hear any more of her talking?! That I don't want to see anybody of you?!"

Just like before, the mask lied on the floor, broken, shattered. There was no mask to wear on, and your true self revealed itself once again.

"What the hell has gotten into you?! Stop being a brat and explain why you hurt Petra!"

Whoever was walking through the hall or near the hall, could hear your yells. It did throw aback a few soldiers who were near; but they know better than interrupt your conflict. But some soldiers couldn't help but pry, and some of them were the newest cadets, Jaeger and Kirchstein, who were walking just by chance.

"You think it's because what happened this morning?" Eren quietly asked, looking at Jean with worry. The taller just frowned, hearing about the rumor going around about you throwing Ral out of your office.

"It may be, you know Petra is a member of Levi's Squad..." He answered, feeling uneasy. The yells were becoming louder by now, and he tried to believe the two of you wouldn't get physical.

"We should go." Eren stated, and Jean nodded. They left, leaving a last glance at your office.

Back to you, the name of her triggered something in your mind.

Petra, Petra, Petra, JUST PETRA. It's because of both of them you are like this! You should just grab your heart and destroy it— that would stop your feelings. That would work.

"Why do you care so much about this?! Why can't you just leave me alone and fuck off!"

"I care about you, you worthless shit! Doesn’t your head understand it?!"

"Stop saying that! What happens to me is none of you fucking business!"

"It is my business, idiot! Answer me already! Why are you like this!?"

He wants to know? Then he will. He will know he is killing you. He is.He isHeisHeisHeisH

eisHeisHeisHeisHeisHeisHeisHe

isHeisHeisHeisHeisH

eis

Something snapped, and you cried out.

"I love you, you piece of fucking shit!" you gasped for air, only to scream the confession again, "I fell in love with you!"

The truth was out.

The realization of what you just said hit you, and you covered your mouth immediately, eyes widened in disbelief.

Levi was as surprised as you were, seeing him with his eyes widened, not saying a word.

The room was filled with silence. Neither of you could say anything by the sudden confession— minutes prior you were yelling at each other, but now the office was quiet.

And just as you tried to fix the mess you just said, Levi quietly asked, "You... what?"

Gulping, you tried to lie— say anything but the truth. But your feelings were out now, he heard it. There was no option but to talk with the truth.

"I—I'm in love with you." You confessed, avoiding his gaze.

"Since when?"

You tightly swallowed, and replied, "Since the first time I saw you."

Maybe he didn’t know how to approach this situation; maybe he was trying to think a better way to tell you he didn’t feel the same way as you did. You talked first, interrupting any thoughts he was having.

“I know— I know you don’t feel the same.” You tried to think clearly, but it was impossible. “I know you love someone else, Levi. I know, so, I… I get it.”

“[Name], I…”

“Don’t talk, please.” Meeting his gaze again, you could recognize confusion, unsureness on his expression. He was lost. “It’s better this way.”

“How do you know that? How can you know what I want? You are—”

“Because you love Petra. I’m not blind." You noted his composure shifted; he was surprised by your statement. You just smiled with bitter, feeling heartbroken. The flowers wanted an exit, and you knew if he didn’t leave right now he would see them, and you didn’t want that at all.

There. Accept it. You are going to ——, so just accept your fate.

“What do you mean—“

“I’m not an idiot. I saw you holding hands— hugging each other! I know everything!” You were getting riled up, irritated by the situation. You wanted to be alone already— he knew the truth, so there was nothing else to say. “Leave already!”

“I’m not leaving until we—“

“LEAVE! I want you out!” you shouted, pushing him out of the room like a kid would. But like you expected, he wasn’t going to leave so easily. He stood himself with the door frame, while you still were pushing his back.

“Stop acting like a goddamn brat!” he yelled, trying to control the current situation, but was unable to do so with you yelling and pushing like a child. He wanted to fix everything— but somehow deep in him, he knew this relationship you had was broken already. Both of you did.

“No! I don’t want to talk no more! I’m telling you to leave!” Trying your best to hold the flowers, your hands were trembling, your face was flustered and you were clenching your teeth. He had to leave now.

“I’m telling you, you little shit—“

A soldier hurriedly came, and taken aback by the situation in front of him at first, he quickly recovered himself and said:

“Corporal! The commander is asking your presence right now!”

Levi was irritated, giving the poor soldier a glare everyone was terrified by. The man just gulped, and explained, “The commander wants you quickly, sir!”

“Can you tell him to fuck off? I’m busy right now.” The ravenette spit out, frowning at the unlucky soldier.

“Sir! He says it’s an important matter!”

“Fuck eyebrows, shit…” he muttered, before leaving his hands off the door frame and gave you a look, “You and I aren’t finished.” And then, he left with the unnamed soldier.

You quickly shut the door and throw up. Your body was trembling, and you had to hold yourself with the desk to bear the pain. The force was harder than hours prior, it felt as knifes were cutting your throat. Your eyes were cloudy— but you could see red on the pink flowers. And also, roots. It was like these awful things were blooming inside you— it was scary.

Finally, you could gasp for air once more. You just stared at the horizon, trying to catch your breath. You sat on the floor, with flowers all around you.

Your throat was sore; you were tired and unsure about the future.

Slowly, you tried to stand up, holding the desk for support. Sitting on you chair; you opened a drawer, revealing a little brown book.

Sighing, you said to yourself, “I think it’s time to read it.,, Right, Darla…?”

First page.

It was written pretty sloppy, like a child write.

Barry and I played on the garden of Clarence today. The woman gave us permission to play, so we did!

We made flower’s crowns, lied on the grass and watch the clouds go by. It was very peaceful!

I like Barry. I hope we can get married when we grow older!

Tomorrow I’m turning ten, and I’m super excited of what Barry will gift to me!!!!

You looked grimly at the page. You felt as you were intruding her secrets— but Barry gave this to you for a reason, right? Even so, the small feeling on your gut told you to stop reading the thoughts of this poor girl.

But you ignored it, and continued.

At the next page, Darla wrote Barry’s name with hearts around it.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

♡♡♡♡Barry and Darla♡♡♡♡

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Flipping the page, you read about Barry gifted his favorite book, and Darla was happy about the gift.

The next pages were the same, thoughts about Barry and her love for him.

Strangely, after some pages the writing style changed to a very elegant one; you came to the conclusion Darla grew up and forgot about the journal, seeing the sudden change of writing.

I was foolish.

I thought we could be together. I was dumb and stupid for believing so.

He never loved me, and he will never do.

I saw Lisa and Barry kissing each other! They are lovers!

Nobody told me anything— I had to see it with my own eyes.

I ran to my house, what else could I do? Telling him I love him when he is with someone else? I can’t do that. I can’t.

The page ends there. You turn another one, just to see an erratic writing.

i’m scared

I’m throwing up flows

Why?

Mom said it’s a curse, that one a very ffwe peple have this

Why im so unlucky????? Hy did I do to desrve this?

Somebody, help me

Im scared

Please, I don’t want to die like this

The page had dark small spots— you believed it was from tears stained by the paper.

This was heartbreaking. You could feel her pain— you could understand it perfectly.

Another page. This time the writing was more collected.

I threw up a lot of flowers today.

They were white.

I’m scared.

I want my mother.

I need my mother.

Mom…

Next page.

Mother explained I have this curse because I love Barry, and he doesn’t love me back.

Something bloom inside my heart? Or something like that, I’m not sure.

How does she know that? She didn’t answer me.

I hate Barry now.

But I love him, too.

Hahahaha. What a fool.

HhhahahahaahahhahahahahhahahhahahhhhahahahhahahahahahhahaHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

Next page.

flowers again.

white

red

Next,

Why me?

Why?

Why me?

Why me? Why me? Why me? Why me? Whywhywhywhywhwywhywhwywhwywhywhwywhwyhwyw

Mother mom mommy…

Next.

I can’t leave the house.

Mom doesn’t allow it, and I don’t want to see Barry.

Stupid, dumb, idiot Barry.

Handsome, funny, Barry…

There’s no help for me.

Mother says a Doctor will come.

Next.

The doctor came, and said he wasn’t sure what was this.

I opened my mouth and he tried to see inside, and whatever he saw it made him scared.

The doctor and my mother talked outside, and I could hear the cries of my mother.

I’m going to die.

Im going to die

I ing o d

[Intangible]

D I n g

M o m

e lp m

s m b d y p e s e h e l p

[Intangible]

You gulped, and flipped the page.

The page made you uneasy, seeing how messy the handwriting was, and how everything was a mess.

IM GONNA DIE

M H E R

SOME B D Y

E L P

F L

O W R S

IN M

Y

L U N GS

C A NT B R

E T

MOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMOMO

Next.

flowers very pretty

mom loves flowers

pretty little flowers

flowers little pretty

little flowrs orsfj

flowersfloweesaldkirwdfkwierskfiwrsfkiwrflowerslfowrsaskj

Next.

barry i miss you

please love me

Next,

little unlucky girl

who is the unluckiest of them all?

Hahahahaha

Its darla

Next.

my throat is hurt

i spit blood

its hard to breathe

Next.

[a drawing of a sunflower]

sunflowers are pretty

I hope I can throw up some

Hhahaha

Next.

I

C N T

B R A H

M OM M M Y

MOTHER

MOM

H L P E

L A SE

F LOWER S

H LP H U TS

[Blood stains]

Turning the page, you were meet with a blank page. You flipped it, trying to find another journal, but there was nothing. That was the last page she wrote.

You slowly closed the journal, leaving it in the drawer.

You just stared at nothing in particular— trying to shake the mortifying feeling. You were scared, scared of what would happen to you by tomorrow.

You weren’t scared— you were terrified,

You could feel something clogging your throat, making you unable to breathe properly. The feel was stronger after your talk with Levi.

Holding your head with both of your hands, you calmed yourself, not shading a tear. There were not tears left— it was enough.

No one came for you, and you didn’t look for anybody.

s e v e n

E m p t y / 5

[ shingeki no kyojin x male reader ]

【 male!various x male!amnesiac!reader 】

[Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in a unknown place -- trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches.

Who is he? And why he can't remember his own face?

Masterlist

chapter five — new memories [1.3]

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

It was one of their usual tasks— bring wood and herbs for Mr. Jaeger. It was a job for Eren and [Name], as Mikasa helped Miss Carla and Beatrice with pastries and baking bread in [Name]’s mom house. Everyone was pleased how nice the relationship between Eren and [Name] turned out— no more fighting but the occasional comments [Name] had to say to stop Eren’s angerish behavior. Surprisingly, they actually could notice how the brunette liked his company, and always wanted to stay at his side. The two women could notice when Eren was being scolded by [Name], he just blushed and averted his face, as if he was embarrassed of his actions.

It was somehow irritating for [Name]. As you could tell, he wasn’t fond of Eren’s voice— it was loud and annoying. He preferred staying with Mikasa or Armin, as their voices were less noisy than Eren’s. Obviously, this was an unusual conflict within the two: [Name] being vocal about his annoyance, and Eren being angry about it.

Eren liked [Name]— it was a fact. Carla and Beatrice could see that so clearly, even if the brunette tried to deny it so desperately. It was a huge change from their beginning— it was actually strange how Eren’s behavior changed when [Name] scolded him, but when Mikasa did it he angered. As Beatrice believed, [Name] was unaware of Eren’s feelings and didn't pay much attention to him. He too denied Eren felt something for him, and just was being the usual ‘hot-head’ he was.

But their differences weren’t always present— they genuinely liked each other and were good friends. [Name] didn’t hate or disliked Eren but the opposite: the amnesiac boy admired how strong and determined he was. It was just his loud voice that made his ears suffer. Nevertheless, [Name] sometimes tried to bear with it and spent time with Eren, and the brunette tried his best to not be ‘noisy’.

But back to the present— Fortunately, Dr. Grisha didn’t say when he wanted the herbs, and neither he looked impatient or urged for them. The two boys decided to rest a little bit in the small woods, the air was fresh and it was surprisingly relaxing there, as no one but them were there. The two carefully placed the bottles full of herbs on the grass before lying on the ground, looking at the sky. [Name]’s eyes sheepishly looked at the clouds, while Eren eyed him, he being unaware of it.

“Say, [Name]...” Eren spoke to get his attention, in which the other hummed in response, “do you think... we could see the ocean together one day...?” He asked with a blush on his face, looking at the other side to hide his embarrassment.

[Name] blinked, still not looking at him. “What’s with the sudden question? The four of us promised we would.” [Name] felt relaxed, blinking slowly. Letting out a yawn, he rubs his eyes, shifting to a more comfortable pose to sleep, not paying much attention on what the other has to say.

“That’s not what I mean...” Eren frowns, unaware of [Name]’s sudden tiredness. “I mean that... maybe we could...” he blushed deeply, unable to explain his feelings. He’s not good at feelings, and when he had never felt something like this before, this is hard for him. Even more when the one you have interest on doesn’t even likes you that much. “I want to see it with you... right at my side.” His whole face is painted in red— he plays nervously with his hands.

The lack of response made Eren impatient. Looking at the side, he noticed [Name] had fallen asleep by the low snoring that could be heard. At first, the brunette felt irritated and angry— as usual, [Name] wasn't paying attention to him. He even tried to not be so loud, and [Name] didn't even care about it! He didn't want to accept the small glint of jealously he felt when the [color haired] boy preferred to be with Mikasa or Armin, but him! Annoyed, the boy crossed his arm and averted seeing the sleeping boy, pouting.

Sighing, the boy lies on the grass, watching the sky. “I’m not that loud...” he speaks to himself, turning to see [Name] with narrowed eyes. The boy lies peacefully, his chest slowly moving up and down as he breathes, both hands tangled over his stomach. Why did he liked [Name] that much? At first he couldn’t stand him— but seeing him... hurting the way he was before, it made him feel... upset and dirty. His guilt was a major factor of his change, and somehow, interacting more with [Name] and knowing him more and more made him interested and curious on him.

He likes him, that’s the truth.

Sitting, the brunette gets closer to [Name]’s form, looking at his face, focusing on him. Eren can’t help himself and slowly leans forward [Name]’s face, Eren’s own heartbeat raising. Gulping, he closes his eyes, hands shaking by his nervousness. He gently kisses the soft lips, deep crimson painting his cheeks. Eren feels... joy as he answers his curiosity, but soon he becomes worried and scared as he feels [Name]’s body shifting. Immediately the brunette breaks the small kiss, almost falling on his back by he sudden separation. He covers his mouth with his hands as he nervously looks at the [hair color] haired blinking sheepishly, looking around and spotting him besides him.

“Eren...? Did I fall asleep...?” [Name] asks as he rubs his eyes, yawning. Stretching, he notices Eren’s quiet and unusual behavior. “Is something wrong...?”

“Uhm— No! E–Everything’s fine! We should get going.” Eren hastily speaks as he gets up and takes the wood and bottles, signaling [Name] to hurry up too. The amnesiac boy blinks confused, but soon stretches and gets up too. He takes the herbs and the wood on his back and waits for Eren to begin walking. Surprisingly, Eren takes his hand wihout warning.

“E–Everything ready?” Eren gulps as he speaks, looking at [Name] with a blush on his cheeks. He pleads in his mind for [Name] not to reject him— to stay like this just for this moment. His heartbeat raising as he sees the amnesiac boy blinking, not giving his thoughts away— Eren has always watched how expressionless [Name] can be. The brunette holds his breath until [Name] answers.

“Yes. Let’s go.” [Name] nods while speaking, walking ahead hand in hand with Eren. By Eren’s surprise, the [hair color] haired boy tangles his fingers with Eren’s, making the brunette’s heart skip a beat. [Name]’s face is the same— serene and calm, while Eren’s is a messy crimson.

They met Hannes in the way back, and the blonde soldier can catch how red Eren is. He couldn’t stop himself from laughing at the unusual scene of them being like this— gaining a ‘what are you laughing at?!’ from Eren, and another scolding from [Name], ‘don’t yell like that.’ making the brunette shut his mouth immediately. Hannes was actually impressed by such interaction— not even Carla nor Mikasa were capable of holding this little ball of anger from acting recklessly.

The walk between the two was unexpectedly calm, as both of them talked about what they will have for dinner. Eren’s face had a big grin, happy by how things turned out.

Flower Curse | 4

[levi x male!reader x erwin] this work will have vomiting, heavy angst and death. the reader suffers from the hanakahi disease. summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him.

t h r e e ___

Your health wasn't an excuse to not doing your job. Erwin wanted you to rest until there was a solution— but you weren't going to obey him. You didn't want to slack off and be the center of attention, you just wanted to stay off radar by everyone. Especially, by your illness' cause:

Levi.

Just thinking of him made you sick and warm— yes, you liked him a lot, loved him, even. But the other part of you made you repulsed of him. You thought the cause of that repulsion was the curse you had, but sometimes, you just wanted to stop loving him. Just to stop the suffering.

But that was impossible, wasn't it? You just can't change your feeling for someone in an instant. The only thing you could do was hide your feelings in the darkest place, with your flowers' company. Hide them from prying eyes, away from everyone. Just your emotions, the flowers and you.

Was this illness really going to kill you? After all you have been through? You didn't want to believe this at all— flowers were more deadly than a stupid titan! Unbelievable. How could it be? Flowers filling your lungs just for unrequited love? You had a hard time believing this ridiculous "curse". But, sadly, this was as real as the titans.

But then... how come nobody knew about this illness? Was this another thing the King hide? How could this be real?

A knock on the door snapped out of your thoughts. “Come in.” You said, rubbing your temple in exasperation.

A blonde picked shyly, then came in and saluted. “Squad Leader [Name], the Corporal is asking for your presence on today's training.”

“Fuck.” You instantly thought. You didn't remember today's task: help Levi with training. Was your luck better than yesterday? Or life was just laughing at you? You passed your hand on your hair, letting out a sigh. “Thanks, Arlert. We should be going or the grumpy old man is going to beat my ass.”

Armin didn't laugh at your comment— the blonde just nodded and smiled. The relationship with the cadets and you weren't that bad in your opinion. You enjoyed talking with the little kid about the outside world— something that was very forbidden to do. Arlert even had a book of the outside that shared with you, by your big surprise.

The kid was very clever; maybe as clever as Erwin. Something unnerving— could this young kid see the same thing Erwin couldn't not see? Could he see your sickness? You noticed your face paled this morning. You wished to whoever to put a blindfold to everyone around you.

Leaving your office with Armin at your side, you jokingly asked, “How is training today? Is the Corporal harsher than before?”

“The Corporal is being a little... harsh, yes. But I don't see much difference as in other training,” he placed finger on his chin, looking thoughtful, “But he seemed a little irritated that you weren’t there.”

“Of course he is going to be like that. I forgot I had to help him training.” You nervously stated. “What's today's training for?”

“We are training with our Vertical Maneuvering Equipment.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” What was worse? Close combat or the damn VME? Both options sounded horrible, but using your gear at your current state made you nervous. When your system wanted to throw the flowers this morning, it didn't gave you any warning like before. You just couldn't contain the urge of throwing it all out. Would the sudden force of the gear make you vomit?

You hoped Levi didn't want you to do use your gear today. You always showed your cadets how to use the gear properly, and when Levi wanted to explain something, you helped him showing the cadets your abilities. This wasn't looking good.

The blonde noticed your silent demeanor, thing that made him confused. “Is something wrong?”

Snapping out of your dark thoughts, you smiled as brightly as you could and looked at him, “There's nothing wrong! I just was thinking about how angry is Levi going to be, you've seen how he gets at the simplest things.”

The cadet looked at you, unsure, before nodding slowly.

You were sure Armin resembled Erwin for a second.

“About time you arrived, lazy shit.” You instantly heard the man of your dreams, —or maybe nightmares— when you arrived with Arlert at the training grounds.

Trying to playing it off, you said, “Hey! I'm not that late, just... thirty minutes late, not that bad.”

“Anyways, somehow you came just in time.” The raven stated before looking at Connie and Eren, the newest recruits. You didn't like what was he going to say, you knew it. “These two can't go faster with their gear, and it seems hearing what i'm saying is too hard for them,” he said irritably, looking at the two nervous cadets, then looked at you with his usual frown, “and I expect you to show it.”

Damn it, damn it, damn it! If you refused, he would ask questions, and the answers would not satisfy him at all— you barely got out of the previous situation thanks for Erwin being there, but now he wasn't. Be an adult and resolve your problems.

This wouldn't be that bad, right? You just had to do some harsh movement. You previous thoughts were you being ridiculous; nothing will happen. Everything will be alright, no need to worry. Everything will be okay. Stop overreacting, nothing will happen.

Armin noticed your discomfort, and before he could said something, Levi looked at him and harshly ordered, “You are still here, Arlert? Go back in training.” The blonde got taken aback looking at his scared face, and ran off with a "yes sir!".

Trying to sound normal and collected, you replied, “Sure thing, what do I need to do?”

“Alright, listen closely you two,” you said, looking at Springer and Jaeger, “For this to work you have to work with your whole body, something that I noticed you don't do in your training today.”

“But I moved more than before and I still can't do it! It's impossible to go faster than that!” Connie exclaimed frustrated, “I don't even know how Jean is going faster than me!”

“That horseface actually go faster than me too, that stupid horse...” Eren mumbled. You just let out a laugh, and tried to act serious— Levi was watching you three from afar. Looking specially at you, though,

“Don't say 'I can't do it' because you certainly can,” you looked at Connie, “Listen, Springer. The Corporal is the fastest of us, you know why?” the cadet shacked his head, taking interest, “It's because of his height. He is very short- just like you. I even can say that you could match his speed at some point.” You tried to raise his spirit, thing that succeeded, by the looks of his joyful face.

Now, looking at Eren, you said, “Jaeger, you have to work with your movement. Just think when you are in air as you... are dancing.” By the looks of his expression, he really didn't fully understand your statement, because his confused frown. “Now, now, don't give me that look. It sounds ridiculous, but it does the job. Just imagine the people dancing at the festivals— they are in sync. You have to be in sync with you gear, just like a dance.” To make them fully understand you had to show them, something you wanted to avoid but it seemed impossible.

“Alright, let me show you. You have to see closely, understand?” They nodded, looking excited. Gulping, you looked ahead into the forest. Ignoring the voice in your head stopping you to do this, you prepared yourself and nailed your hook at the nearest tree, and then, you flied.

At first, it didn't feel that uncomfortable. Your mission here was to not be that harsh with your movements, but showing the speed to the cadets was the point of this, so avoiding any movement seemed impossible.

“Now I have to turn...” You reluctantly thought. Your grip tightened and in the second your hooks nailed in the trees, at first you prepared for the worst, but when nothing came you relaxed and even smiled. Even taking a look on the two cadets made you relaxed; they were in awe and the corporal just looked pleased.

“See? Nothing to be wo-”

And then, you felt it.

Your thoughts got interrupted thanks to the familiar sensation on your throat. The feeling made you alerted and disorientated, making you lose your grip on the blades and unhooking them off the tree. The falling wasn't that flawless, looking at how high you were.

You fell on some bushes, making your fall at least not that bad. When you hit the ground you instantly threw up white flowers, ignoring any pain you felt at the moment.

Full little flowers. At first sight, they were beautiful, but not for you anymore.

You practically forced yourself to stop vomiting, and held any flowers from coming out. Knowing the others will come to see if you were alright, at least you had to bear with all the pain until you could get out of there. Trying your best to cover the petals with the bushes, you tried to stand but failed to do so.

“Squad Leader [Name]! Are you alright?!” you heard both Connie and Eren calling for you, and less than a minute they were with you, helping you to stand. Gulping all petals who wanted to come out, you tried your best to just smile.

“Phew! That was a nasty fall. Sorry you had to see that, and i'm the example here, haha...” dusting off your clothes made wince in pain, thing you tried to hide by just laughing. The pair of cadets just kept talking and trying to not worry you that much. They both eventually stopped talking when a certain corporal appeared, with an expression you know very well— he was trying to know what happened, read the situation.

“Cadets, both of you will look for Petra and tell her she's on training duty.” Hearing his orders, both of them saluted and left. He looked at your poor act of getting it together, and asked angrily, “What the hell happened?”

Come on, [Name]! Keep it together!

“My hooks didn't sunk in the tree, simple as that.” Scratching your head, you proceed, “Actually, maybe the hand-grip isn't that-”

“Stop talking shit.”

You gulped. “Uh? What are you talking about? I said my hooks—”

“Quit lying to me.” Levi approached you, taking your arm roughly, making you gasp in pain. Actually, your senses awoken again— now fully feeling the pain in your arm, leg and ribs. “You know I hate lies. More if they come out of your mouth.”

You didn't say a word at all. You didn't dare to make the situation worse.

“Can you walk?”

Leaving his grip on your arm, you tried to take a few steps; you could walk, but you were limping with your right leg. And every time you took a step, a sharp pain was felt in your knee. Levi sighed in irritation, and helped you walk by taking your arm on his shoulder and placing his hand on your waist.

“What a pathetic attempt.”

The closeness made you sick, and the flowers wanted to be released.

“We'll go to the infirmary, then.”

Your ribs didn't break, thankfully. You just had some colorful bruises covering your right leg, left arm and waist. It wasn't that bad, not as bad as the flowers, at least.

After getting parched up, you both went to Levi's office, just to do some "relaxing" paperwork you both had to do. You always went to his office to make him company, something he didn't mind. You had to play it safe— if you avoided him, he would ask questions, and when he asks he wants real answers. Things you couldn't give.

Somehow, your little talk made you forget about all of the feelings and thoughts you were having. There was just the two of you, like it always has been. You forget about the flowers, and they seemed to forget about you just for a moment.

“You have something on your hair.” you heard the raven say, seeing his hand coming closer to you, taking off a leave. “And there's something on your face, too. Disgusting...” Even when he said that, his fingers touched your cheek, cleaning it off, before cleaning his own fingers with a napkin.

The event made you slightly blush —at least you hoped—, and thank him.

“A-Anyways, did Petra said anything about Eren and Connie?” you asked, remembering the little talk both of them had an hour ago, when you were in the infirmary getting check on.

“They did better,” he replied, writing on his papers. “They wanted to know badly how you were, though.”

“Aw! They care about me!” you exclaimed with a big smile. Even if you wanted to play it off, the feeling of the kids caring about you warmed your heart. “How adorable!” The feeling just made you blush.

Your words made the Corporal look at you with a questioning gaze. “What? Do you think they are the only ones caring about you?” Levi asked, stopping his work. “How disappointing.”

Laughing, you talked, “What am I hearing? Does Levi care about me more than the cadets?”

“What if I do?”

Your grip on the pen tightened; your heartbeat went crazy; your blush covering your cheeks went deeper, covering your ears. Words seemed disappear of your vocabulary— you didn't understand how some words could steal your breath like that. But it was because it's him. The one you like the most. Time seemed to stop.

It seemed that the sight of you made him smirk in pleasure. He come closer to your face, looking directly at your eyes. “I asked something. What If I care more than them?”

[Name]! Remain your composure! “W-Well, uhm...” clearing your throat, you proceed, “Then you care about me. That's... all...”

“Why you always forget?”

“Forget? Forget what?”

“About how I can't stand your lies.”

“Lies?! Ahem! What do you want me to say? It's nice that you care about me.” You stopped thinking about what you were saying, so you just let whatever thing came out of your mouth. Uh-oh. Good or bad thing? “I care about you too, anyways.”

He arched his eye brown,“Is that so?”, he slightly smiled, by your surprise. “More than the cadets do, I assume?”

“Of course. We've know each other since you came here, right? Actually, I think I'm the first one who didn't fall for your scary face, along with Hange.”

“Ah, how could I forget how irritating you were,” closing his eyes, he proceed, “even when I knocked you out, you kept being a childish little shit, always returning.”

“Hey! But you love this little shit, don't you?” Laughing, you returned to your work, uncaring of the answer.

“I'm glad you stayed.”

You froze. Levi wasn't the time of saying this like this to you; there were always harsh words in a playful nature. But nothing like this before. Nevertheless, him saying that made a smile on your face.

“I'm glad too.”

After that, a pleasant silence fell. The only sound the both of you heard was the pens writing on your papers and the sound outside. You didn't notice the sky turning dark, until an ocasional glance to the window made you exclaimed, “It's dinner time!”

The Corporal looked at the dinner and let out a hum, you only proceed to stand up from your seat and stretch. “Let's go, Levi. We forgot to do tea, so let's hurry up!”

“Go first, I will join soon.” He replied.

“Alright, then. Will make tea when I get there.” Nodding your head, you didn't bothered to bring you papers with him; it was normal for you to leave them arranged on a part of his desk. He always said "take your shit with you", but you always laughed it off. Strange, because this time, he didn't say anything. You left, but your thoughts made you slow your walk.

You noticed Levi was being more... open to you. Could that be a sign? Maybe? And now that you remember it, flowers weren't trying to get out of your throat. You even forgot about the illness, about the pain, about your future... You felt... nice, warm. Just like before the curse.

Could it be that... you had a future with him? The sudden thought made you blush and smile in embarrassment. Was he, maybe, in love with you? The conversation repeated on your head - and your mind kept re rolling the exact same phrase.

“I'm glad you stayed.”

“What if I care more than them?”

You stopped walking, and come to the realization that you actually wanted to make a move. Nothing could go wrong! The conversation of today made you believe that something could happen between the two of you! A bright smile made through your face thinking this— there was hope after all!

There was not time to waste, then! Your mind was made up— you were confessing right now. No one could interrupt you now; everyone had to be getting dinner, so the two of you couldn't be bothered. You nodded to yourself, and went back to Levi's office.

You couldn't believe it - this was all like a dream to you. You actually were going to have a future! You were going to be cured; everything was going to be alright from now on.

Noticing his door slightly opened, you scolded yourself for not paying attention to close it properly before leaving. Hey! That's not important right now! Shaking your head, you couldn't wait to open it and tell Levi your true feelings. Oh! You couldn't wait to tell Erwin and Hange about—

...

.

.

.

.

.

Ah. How could you forget? So foolish.

The sight in front of you made you petrify.

What was that you were feeling...? Surprise? Fear? Or was it... Heartbreak? How could you point the exact time your heart shattered, and the flowers bloomed once more in your heart? The realization fell like a ton of bricks. You never meant to be loved by him, it was for her. It never was for a person like you. Not you. Never, ever, for you. How could you forget? How? You were in denial.

The sudden realization made you snap out from your illusion.

NEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOUNEVERFORYOU.

You are a fool.

You really thought he loved you?

What a pitiful sight.

Go and cry, there's no saving you.

Thoughts invaded your mind like a parasite — repeating themselves with not a chance to be stopped.

And what was the sight that made you so unstable? Well, maybe you know it already.

Two people were embracing each other, with the moonlight above them, looking beautiful as a couple. Who were this two, you ask?

Levi, and Petra, obviously.

The petals were awoken once more, and with such a bestial force you never felt before.

Covering your mouth with your hand, you couldn't stop some petals to escape and lay on the floor, by your ignorance. You just ran out of there, and went to the only place your unstable mind wanted you to be.

Erwin arranged his paperwork again for maybe, the sixth time this night. There were never ending letters to respond, check once more the strategies for the upcoming expedition, and more, more letters.

“Seems like a sleepless night, again.” He thought, rubbing his temples.

Little did he know his lack of sleep wouldn't be only the papers.

The sudden noise of someone opening his door made him annoyed— and before he could scold the responsible person, he stopped himself as he saw you kneeling on the floor, vomiting white petals— no, flowers.

Without thinking he went to your side and rubbed your back in a gently manner. He remained calm, but something his sight caught made him horrified.

White flowers were decorated in red.

Outside, he remained clam, but in the inside he was more than worried; if vomiting flowers was a bad sign, vomiting blood with them was far worse.

You eventually stopped; you only could gasp, trying to breath. Your nostrils were leaked water, your lips had blood and saliva, and the only comforting thing that made you sane was Erwin beside you.

“I'm going to die, Erwin,” you could only say, with desperation in your voice. “I'm going to die, I'm going to die, I'm going to die...”

Erwin tried his best to hush you, “That's not true. We are going to fix this, there's a solution...” and he continued and continued, trying to calm your sobs and pleas. Hearing you like this, so broken, desperate, made something inside him ache. He only embraced you, holding you. You only wanted someone close to you, someone to hold you.

He had to move things fast, and find a way to fix you before it was too late.

“Let's go, then!” a certain blushing girl said, smiling brightly. The raven only nodded with a soft gaze, walking beside her, until something on the floor took his attention.

“Flowers?” Levi thought, looking at the white petals on the floor. Kneeling, he took some and look at them quietly. Beautiful at first sight, hiding the true meaning they had.

“Aren't you coming, Corporal?” Petra said, turned at him.

Levi hummed, covering the little flower on his front pocket, and returned walking, “[Name] is waiting.”

Cyclamen. Cyclamens are symbolic of resignation. It’s the flower that means goodbye too.

Because it is poisonous, death is also attached to its meaning. It also presents the fact that good things come to an end and so it’s also the type of flower you might want to make use of at funerals – because it speaks of departure aside from moving away and retiring.

f i v e

Flower Curse | 1. White Petal

[levixmale!readerxerwin]

english isn’t my first language, so sorry for the grammatical errors!

this work will have vomiting, heavy angst and death. the reader suffers from the hanakahi disease.

summary: you loved him. he didn’t. everything goes downhill when suddenly, you cough a petal when you think of him.

The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs of flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals.

1

Love hurt. Even more with the disease you had; some people could say it was ’poetic’ and so ’romantic’. You could have thought that one day a long time ago; just because this curse was so rare to have or yet so slim. You had yet to find someone who had this in real life and not in some fairy tales in child books or romantic novels for adults.

x x x It all began when you were alone in your office, working on some stressful paperwork Hanji handed you to finish for today. You were so deep in your work that the knock on your door wasn't heard at all. It was at the third attempt that you heard a female voice you knew to well. “Who and why?“ you irritably asked, one hand on your temple and another holding a paper not yet finished. “Petra Ral, bringing more paperwork, sir” she answered opening the door as you told her to come in. Sending you a gentle smile, she gave you the papers and spoke with some playfulness in her sweet voice, “It seems everybody is really busy today! Your voice scared me more than the Corporal, [Name]!“ You only closed your eyes and slightly laughed, sitting more comfortably on your seat. Looking at her, you tiring smiled, “Sorry, Petra. Somehow today we have a lot of paperwork, and you know paperwork is boring as hell,” you both laughed, “How is the Corporal? Is he handling this better than me?” You knew she tried to hide her blushing when speaking about her Corporal, but you were to observant to not notice it. You always are observing every little detail about everyone, even her with no exceptions. You knew she and you had feelings for the same person but unlike her, nobody knew about your feelings about the Corporal. Well, just Erwin knew; the man was like a hawk. He knows everything and sees everything; just like Mike magical nose. These two were weirdos, but great friends nevertheless. “He’s been stressed, but making him some tea relax him,” Petra gets near to you and covers her mouth, as like telling a secret she only knew about, “I think I'm making better tea lately! He’s been complimenting me a lot!” this time the blush on her cheeks was stronger and smiles at you with a dreaming smile you always saw on other cadets when talking about their lovers, just like that Jean kid in lunch looking at Mikasa with a cheesy look. You knew loving the corporal was a bad idea. Levi wasn't that talkative about liking someone in that way, hell, you don't even know if he loved someone in that way. Yes, you both were great friends, the two of you liked to drink tea together and talk about the present and future, about the new recruits and their skills, joking together or just stay in a comfortable silence. You treasured his friendship, so ruining it by confessing was an absolute and horrible mistake you weren't going to make. He didn't loved you that way and you were okay with that. Until Petra came and everything began to hurt. You wished being observant wasn't one of your skills. You wished you didn't notice the glances they gave each other when they were alone or someone wasn't looking. You wished you didn't see the sparkles on both of their eyes. You wished deep in your heart, to not notice how Petra ’accidentally’ brushed her hand on his and he didn't say a word. You wished, you really did. Lies was one of your strong skills too. If talking to the Corporal and not showing any affection or jealously when glancing at their actions wasn't like wearing a mask everyday a skill you didn't know what was. Nobody break trough your thick mask, unlike Erwin. The fucker very well knew about all of your façade, how could he not? You two were close and just to see into your eyes he knew everything. “Is that so, Petra? It seems like you being his wife isn't that far far away...” you grinned, making a cheesy face at her. Only to get her blushing like a tomato, covering her face with both hands. “Don't say that THAT loud! Someone can hear you!” “As if no one knows, little Petra. Why don't you both go in a date already? At this rate someone is going to make better tea than you... I'm just saying...” you teased her with a playful smile. Petra was your friend, you couldn't feel bad things for her. She was really sweet and pretty. She was like a sister to you, and you were a brother to her. You didn't intended the relationship being like that but it just happened. “You think so?! But— what if he doesn't like me back?” “Petra, my dear, I'm sure he likes you back.” you reassured her. “You really think I don't see how he looks at you? You know how he feels. I know.” you thought, feeling a sharp pain in your chest that you ignored and faked a smile. “Maybe I will tell him soon... Thank you, [Name]. Also, if it weren't for you, I wouldn't make good tea! Thank you again for the tips. Levi really likes it.” “You're welcome, Petra. Good luck on telling him, I'm sure he feels the same way.” Saying farewells both of you returned to your work. When she left, your expression changed completely with a grimmer one. You didn't smile; just stared at nothing in particular. You were thinking on how they would look together, how they would hug and say each other “I love you”. The thought repulsed and hurt you; sickening you. A pain in your chest made you snap out of it, making you to cough harshly. You felt as if something wanted to get out of your throat; but it didn't feel like vomit at all. It stopped when you coughed a white petal, something that confused you completely. Did you breathe in petals by accident? That was unlikely, there weren't any flowers nearby. But then, how did this petal got in? Something felt very wrong to you. You just stared at the petal dumbfounded, not really knowing what to think of it. You just placed it next to your paper, already forgetting about it.

t w o

Flower Curse | B. Love someone else

erwin's ending

[erwin x male!reader x levi] hanahaki disease; angst, no vomiting here. B. Love someone else.

Could you love someone else? Could you change your feelings that easily? At first, that sounded impossible— but, if you wanted to survive this mess, then you had to do something about it. You didn't want to try your luck with Levi's answer— knowing fully well if you weren't loved back would turn things worse.

The negative thoughts made you sigh in exasperation. How are you even going to change your feelings? Every time you tried to even think about stopping loving the short man, your mind and heart went erratic in denial. And anyways, who could love you? Loving someone else would just hurt you, if anything. Maybe you should try to stop loving at all— but of course, that thought was impossible.

Then, your objective was changing your feelings. Not an easy task. Hmn... Maybe Erwin or Hange could help you out? Wait, talking about Erwin... Wasn't he a little weird lately? You often could catch him staring at you in a way you couldn't recognize— and always checked on you. Somehow, his worry made you feel something warm deep inside.

Before, he wasn't that touchy if you could remember. Yes, he sometimes got worried for you in the expeditions, but there were just words, no touches. Not that you minded, though.

Could it be...? Nah, of course not.

...Right?

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

Knocking on the door, you receive an answer. You open the door, peeking inside before entering. Seeing his tensed form, how serious and grumpy he looked made you let out a chuckle, which made him look at you and smile.

"[Name], nice to see you this soon. Do you need something?" Erwin asks, slightly relaxing his composure, softening his gaze on you.

Approaching him, you replied, "Hange sent you these papers," You place the papers on his desk, along with the many others that were there, "something about new experiments methods? Didn't really paid much attention, hehe." You laugh, rubbing your neck in slight embarrassment.

He lets out a deep chuckle, "As expected of you." He jokes; taking a paper from Hange's.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean, eyebrows?!" He only laughs, and you can't help but laugh with him too. It was weird to hear him laugh lately — to even relax with him.

You notice how he rubs his neck, how tensed his shoulders look. He looks uncomfortable, and even if he knows how to hide everything, sometimes you are lucky enough to catch something unusual from him.

"Take your jacket off." You bluntly say, placing yourself behind him. The demand makes him confused at first, but quickly catches your intentions.

"I'm alright, [Name]. You can go now." He says, but you just ignore him.

"You take it off or I do it. Don't try me, Smith." Placing your hands on your hips, you wait. A smile appears on your face when he obeys, letting out a sigh at first. You take his jacket, placing it on a chair. "Alright, Erwin. Just relax and let me do the job— just keep working and leave your tension with me."

"My shoulders are in your hands."

And with that, you begin to work. You place your hands inside his shirt, near his collar. Pressing your hands against his skin, you tried to be as gentle as possible; but you could feel the tension already on his shoulders.

The blond keeps writing on the papers, slightly relaxing under your touch. You smile a little, pleased that he is less tensed now.

Without minding too much, your eyes began to wonder on his form. You are smaller than him— his skin feels warm against your palms. You can barely grip his strong shoulders under your smaller hands— you began to remember the few times he has embraced you; how he wraps his arms around your form, when you are too fragile to even think. Unknown for you, your hands began to wonder a little too much, and a certain blond notices.

The weird an unusual urge of taking his hands with yours clouds your mind, but a sudden comment made you snap out of your thoughts.

"You weren’t on the mess hall this morning.” He states, not giving you a glance. You shift uncomfortably, blushing.

“No, I wasn’t.” You affirm, sighing. “I wasn’t hungry.”

He hums, not believing you are telling the full truth. You knew he could see through you, even if you two weren’t looking at each other right now.

Silence overcomes after that. You keep massaging his shoulders, and your mind wonders for a moment, thinking again about the blond in front of you— with the consequence of you gripping a little too hard on him, making him let out a deep grunt. Quickly, you let go, blushing by the sound he made.

“S-Sorry! I wasn’t paying attention!” You blurt out, embarrassed by getting distracted by your unusual thoughts about him. Your hands leave him, taking a step back.

He doesn’t say anything at first— you can see how he slowly gets up from his seat, with his back still facing you. There's silence, and you are not sure about what to say or act— you feel suddenly nervous around him right now.

"What were you thinking right now?" He asks, finally turning at you. You feel his strong gaze on you, feeling slightly intimidated by it. You shift uncomfortably, gulping.

"W-What's with the sudden q-question?" You nervously ask, trying to stay calm.

He doesn't answer— instead, he slowly approaches you, like a prey. You avert his gaze, blushing and sweating. The blond finally gets in front of you, and quickly puts both of his arm on the little desk you were supporting yourself. He traps you, like a cat with a mouse.

"W-What has gotten into you...?" You still avert his gaze, gulping nervously. Was he playing with you? Trying to make you do something? The man was hard to read— you didn't have a clue of what he was doing or thinking.

He gets closer to your face, and you could feel the warm irradiating from him, making you blush. "What were you really thinking...?" He whispers in a deep voice, right on your ear. The warm makes you shiver, and he slightly smirks.

The taller man likes being this close to you— being able to see your blushing face, you shivering under him, getting nervous because of him... He didn't know that being with you in your hardest moments was going to make him fall in love with you— hell, he could say that he liked you before, but not that badly like now.

At first, he didn't think much about the massage. But he could feel how your hands began to wonder a little too much around his neck, and somehow noticed your fingers shaking a little. The blond quickly noted your change of mood, and decided to make a move that he would regret or not later.

"Look at me when I ask you something." He demands, and you instantly turn your head to look at him. Your lips are pressed in a thin line, and you can feel your legs shaking. You meet with his blue eyes— they are piercing, focused on you. Very deep down, you like this closeness between you.

And before you can react or say anything, he quickly snaps and steps back, leaving you in a total mess. Blinking, you look at him and notice his frown— he looks... ashamed? embarrassed? You are not entirely sure, but somehow, the situation made you sure about something.

"Sorry, [Name], I didn't—"

You don't let him finish— instead, you harshly took the front of his shirt with both of your hands and close the distance between the two of you. And then, you do the unthinkable—

You kiss him.

Erwin doesn't react at first— he's surprised by your sudden actions, and really doesn't know how to act at first. Nevertheless, the blond quickly gives in, placing his hands on your waist, making you closer.

You acted by instinct; and even if your mind wasn't that clear at the moment, you loved the feeling. You love how he touches you, how close he is. Eventually, you both separate to get air, and Erwin places a hand on your cheek, softly looking at you with what seemed lust.

"But I thought you..." He whispers, not finishing what you know he was going to say.

"I—I know... Me too, but..." Looking at him, you can feel your heart beating rapidly. Gulping, you try to explain yourself, but just an incoherent comment gets out. "I—I think my feelings changed... B—But if you don't-!"

He chuckles and press his lips against yours to make sure that he reciprocates— making you embarrassed once again by your dumb thoughts. "Of course I do, [Name]. I adore you." He confesses, and you can feel your whole being shaking by hearing him say that.

His thumb caresses your lips, and you unconsciously press yourself against him in anticipation. He laughs by your actions, making you hide your blushing face on the crook of his neck. Erwin doesn't exactly say it, but feeling your warm breathes against his neck made him shiver and begins to wonder how much closer he can get to you.

The blond places a hand on your hips, with the other one harshly taking your chin to look at him. The man looks at you with lust, and you are surprised to see such an emotion on him. Not that you mind, thought. You shiver in anticipation, your mind getting some messy ideas about the two of you, and Erwin certainly catches that.

"We should lock the door, shall we?"

x x x x x x x x x x x x

Not much after that, you notice you have no more problems with the curse. The flowers disappear, along with the feeling of being unable to breath. You feel alive again, and you are more than happy for how the things turned out in the end.

Your feelings surely changed; your heart belonged to someone else one, and that one was Erwin. You treasured all of the moments with him, how your hands touch in the mess hall, the messy kisses you both shared, the nights you spent in his office—

Ahem- You get the idea.

Your relationship with Levi didn't change— yes, your feeling for him changed, but you stopped avoiding him. Your relationship with the commander wasn't something public, but none of you really denied it. And obviously, the short man could see everything you two did.

The black haired man couldn't explained, but he felt something stung on his chest everything he could catch the two of you touching or getting too close. He didn't get angry at the moment he knew about your relationship, but he didn't get happy either.

He wasn't pleased— and Erwin could see his unusual frown when he glanced at him, something that he really didn't care about. The taller man only cared about you, and he certainly would treasure all of these memories with you.

Yes, Levi wasn't happy with how everything turned out. And even if he wanted to clear his mind, only confusion got the best of him when he see both of you walking trough the halls looking so happy. Something inside the short man tightened every time, feeling repulsed by the sight.

And when his thoughts cleared and got to the conclusion that the feelings he had for you were stronger than a friendship, he was too late.

Are you happy with the choice you made?

e m p t y | 4 — new memories [1.2]

Surprisingly, the survey corps' soldiers visited Beatrice and [Name]. It was a great joy for the little [hair color]-haired boy seeing the taller blonde again.

A knock on the door was heard. [Name] quickly let go of his pen and stood up to open the door, as Beatrice was busy making lunch. When [Name] opened the door and for his and Beatrice's surprise, it was three soldiers— survey corps' soldiers. Of course, the boy recognize them immediately. Specially, the taller blond in the middle of the two.

A smile appeared on [Name]'s face, an unusual thing for him. His whole face brightened up as he spoke, "Mr. Erwin!" He quickly hugged the man's leg, making Erwin chuckle by the action. The ravenette on his left quirked an eyebrow seeing such an action, while the much taller man on his right stared a little surprised.

"Oh my! Come in, gentleman! You just came in time for lunch!" Beatrice greeted, cleaning her hands on her apron as she approached the three men, opening the door to let them in.

"There's no need, ma'am. We came here just to greet you, as we were passing by this district." Erwin spoke as he patted [Name]'s head, who still was hugging his leg.

"Seems the brat is your number one admirer, Erwin.” Levi joked, while Mike snorted.

"[Name]! Let the men come in, please. Have manners, boy!" Beatrice playfully scolded him, which gained a embarrassing [Name] nodding, looking at the floor. The boy separated from Erwin's leg before retreating to Beatrice, letting them enter. "And don't be shy, you three! I made just enough for all of us, so don't worry about it!" The woman guided them with her hand behind their shoulders, making them sit by force.

"We really don't intend stay that long, ma'am." Erwin spoke, making Beatrice dismiss him with her hand.

"Nonsense! This is at least what I can do for your duty as survey corps soldiers. So hush and enjoy!"

"Tsk. How persistent.” The ravenette stated, but not in bad tone. He didn’t mind Beatrice being this welcoming— it was a nice change.

“Hmm? I noticed you remembered your name?” Erwin asked, smiling at [Name]. The boy nodded excitedly.

“Yes! That’s the only thing I can remember, but somehow that’s enough for now.” [Name] smiled, moving his legs back and forward. For some reason, the kid loved being with Erwin– maybe it was just the blonde was the first person he trusted.

The blond chuckled, amused by the positive behavior. The boy was different since their first encounter, and this was Erwin's first visit since then. [Name] had a small spark in his eyes than he didn't have, and seemed much more relaxed now. The boy still had a lost gaze, but looked more... alive?

"Sometimes that's for the better. But I see you are comfortable with Beatrice."

The woman smiled for herself, placing the plates on the table for each one of them. Mike smirked by the sweet and delicious aroma only Beatrice could make with her food.

"Of course. Mom... is really kind to me and helps me with my headaches." He smiled.

"You still have them?" This time the ravenette interjected, drinking the tea Beatrice gave him. [Name] nodded.

"My poor baby suffers a lot with them— fortunately Dr. Grisha does what he can to help us." She caressed [Name]'s cheek before sitting. "He says it's his head responding to him forcefully trying to remember."

"And the brat as stubborn as he can be doesn't follow simple orders, right?" Levi guessed, not surprised. [Name] blushed and averted their gazes by being called out, eating in silence.

Beatrice laughed, "you know how kids can be. But I don't blame him..." She caressed his head again, looking at him lovingly.

"Babying him this much won't help him at all, Beatrice. Look at the brat's face— he enjoys it." Levi changed the grim conversation, making [Name] embarrassed by the sudden attention.

"Come on! He's a big boy! And such a handsome one. Our neighbor has already his eyes for him." She playfully raised her eyebrows, making gossip.

While hearing this, [Name]'s eyes widened and instantly spoke loudly. "That's not true! Eren is a big hot-head!"

Laughing for his behavior, Beatrice tried to hold more of her laughter with such a cute reaction from him. "But he looked so worried when you weren't waking up, love!"

"He got sick?" Erwin asked surprised.

"Oh! Of course. Let me tell you the beginning of this love's tale..."

The talk between all of them was enjoyable— Beatrice loved talking to them, it was as if she was an old friend of them, which she was. She explained that her husband was a survey corp soldier but he died on an expedition four years ago. She knew being a soldier of this branch was stressful enough, and all the snarky comments people made of them were hurtful for others. So, she always gifted food or pastries on their return, granting acknowledge between the soldiers. They already knew who he was thanks to her husband, but all of them were surprised enough to the kindness she had after such sad events.

"You really think that's enough for everybody? I can make more if you just wait." Beatrice spoke, everybody outside her home, talk and meal finished.

Erwin chuckled, amused by such caring behavior. "This should be enough. We thank you for your great help, Beatrice."

"Oh you! Such a handsome and charming commander!" She playfully smacked his shoulder, laughing. "You know the survey corps have the doors of my house open anytime." She looked at Mike, who was watching the surroundings. "And you, Mike? How was the food this time?"

The taller man slightly smiled. "Lovely as always, ma'am."

While they were chattering, [Name] was comfortable hugging Erwin's leg— it was fun as hell for the other two soldiers how this kid was so close to the blonde, who only saw two times, and a few glances before going to expeditions.

"Eren is coming." [Name] stated, confusing Beatrice.

"What, sweetie?"

"[Name]!!!!!" A young voice yelled from the distance, taking all of their attention to the other side of the house— [Name] instantly recognized the brunette running along with Mikasa and Armin right at them.

"So that's the lovebird." Levi snorted, 'glaring' at the kids, who as they got near them stopped instantly. They were in awe— Armin and Eren, to be certain. The two widened their eyes and looked at the soldiers in admiration. They were their heroes, after all!

But Erwin was surprised [Name] was correct of their arriving— just as he was back then when he found him. Could he have good hearing? Just as Mike recognizes certain smells? "How did you know your friend was coming?" He couldn't stop from asking, looking at the kid who was hugging his leg.

"I heard him. He's louder than others." [Name] answered, receiving a "that's impressive" from Erwin, which made him blush and hide his face in embarrassment. The blonde chuckled in amusement and ruffled his hair.

"We have to go now or we'll be late. Again, thank you for everything, ma'am." The blonde spoke and smiled to the woman. Beatrice nodded and signaled [Name] to come, which he reluctantly obeyed, but not before pulling Erwin's shirt to take his attention. The man kneeled, and [Name] shyly whispered something only the two of them could hear. Smiling warmly, the blond nodded and the [hair color]-haired boy raised his pinky finger, in which Erwin tangled with his'. [Name] smiled and went to Beatrice, finishing the 'secret talk', letting Erwin stand up again.

The ravenette quirked an eyebrow, amused. "What was that? A cheesy confession?"

He didn't answer. "Well then, see you again."

"Hope you come again soon, gentleman! Please, take care." Beatrice waved, seeing the three leaving.

The three kids, who watched the entire thing, ran to [Name] and Eren instantly began to ask a lot of questions to him.

"Why were they are your house?! And what did he say to you? Are they coming again?!" Both Eren and Armin talked, while Mikasa watched the men disappear from afar.

"And what did you tell him?! Tell me!!!"

"It's a secret." [Name] answered, getting irritated by Eren's loud voice.

"What?! TELL ME!"

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"And? What did that brat told you?" Levi spoke, hiding his interest in the 'secret' they both shared.

Chuckling, Erwin just stared in front of him, remembering such innocent encounter— something that they didn't encounter in their stressful daily life. "It's a secret."

"Ah? What kind of ridiculous bullshit he say?" The ravenette glared. "You are acting like a brat."

Mike could only chuckle at their behavior— leaving his past thoughts at ease.

He couldn't pin point the kid's aroma, still.

"Anyways— never seen his eyes before. They are... different."

"Peculiar, aren't they? I wonder..."

"Yours are weird too."

"Are you talking to me, tree?"