It's not just other people we need to forgive. We need to forgive ourselves.
It feels like I’m drowning. I can’t breathe and every time I try to reach the surface, there’s another wave ready to crash down on me and break me again.
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I could've been better,
Why didn't you let me,
Kept me in this cage for so long,
I'm trying to break free.
Not a toy you can play with,
Then throw away like a waste.
So much I missed on,
So much to catch on.
I wish I had some sense then.
Probably wouldn't have let you do what you did.
But I guess it's the time to move on
It's the time to move on...
Am I really that bad
You say I'm worthless
That's what makes me sad
And I think you're right
You're soo great
You want me to be like you
But I know, I'm just a brat
I can never be like you
Cause I'm me and you're you
Not even a day goes without a fight
You don't even know the shit you say
Makes me wanna explode like a dynamite
That is what makes my mind and heart shut tight
I just wanna cry
And want you to comfort me
But you don't even seem to try
You just let it be
You always make me sad
Only because you're mad
But I guess, I'm really that bad.
Fernando Pessoa, from Un Soir à Lima; A Little Larger Than the Entire Universe: Selected Poems (tr. by Richard Zenith)
One day this will kill me and I can't wait for that day to come.