Yeah It Hurts When U Lose People But It Hurts More When They Just Drift Away From U. Then It Feels Like

some nights i feel so alone that a bubble balloons up in my stomach and dares to pop and im terrified that my mood will explode with it and ill have no emotions left and i will just be left empty with scattered organs and mindless memories of a simpler time when i felt the warmth of another body and could connect but the present is so cold

Not going to lie . this might be the worst july Ever. and that might or might not be related to me turning Eighteen (crazy)

sometimes i think about how hard it is for me to cry and how numb i feel about everything, i wish i was still a crybaby i miss who i was before i let the emptiness take me over

To YOU it’s bad writing. To ME it’s a very nuanced piece of work that explores subtle intricacies without outright saying it. And also it’s bad writing

being a thalassophile with thalassophia is horrifying. God set me up for failure

and i wish to be angelic and for plants and flowers to grow in the path i walk and not because i am holy but because i am so beautiful they cannot resist

but i also wish to drink all of the water on this world and rub the dirt onto my body until i become part of it and the plants and flowers become part of me and the water flows from the pores of my body and we all become lost in the complete tranquillity and lunacy of it all and my mind drowns in the middle and i no longer exist as a form of anything but a planet in the vast universe of vaster universes and the milky way swallows me up as we wander together

blue (2002)

i cant tell my older brother that ill be forever envious of his first baby because i was his first baby so ill suffer

and i care so much and ill probably care always but i need to change and grow and care about everything else because it is too much to be alive and i need to bear my sorrows elsewhere. i care, i care too much, i care always and anyways because im a carer, but i need to care about myself more right now

i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do care i do.