If You Think Hermes Wouldn’t Wear Winged Heelys You’re Wrong

benvolio, mercutio, horatio, and ophelia all have a group chat called "bastard-free zone." sometimes they go out to brunch just to get away from romeo and hamlet's bullshit

i make fun of horatio for finding the most dramatic person he could and just enabling his behavior

and then i look in the mirror like "huh shakespeare in the park is looking a lil different this year"

can someone please explain to me the trend in the 90s of doing films of Shakespeare but setting them with a vaguely Victorian/Edwardian aesthetic? Like, Midsummer '99, Hamlet '96, and Twelfth Night '96.

Apollo: Hey, Hermes, I've got something to tell you. I'm pan.

Hermes: Ha, I knew it! I've never seen you and goatboy in the same place at the same time!

Apollo: No, godsdamn it I-

Victor Frankenstein, playing god and defying all rules of ethics:

i identify with hamlet because i, too, am a bisexual disasterpiece.

me at any character whos supposed to represent the american dream

Dorian Gray's the type of person who goes around calling himself a "social media influencer" after getting more than 10 likes on Instagram.

the first 10 likes were all Basil

Greek gods & heroes as bdg 2

Sisyphus:

Demeter:

Practically all of the gods at some point or another:

i know theres a "gay best friend" trope but i feel like we need to formally acknowledge the "due to unfortunate circumstances i am gay for an absolute bastard" trope

now this is, of course, just another excuse for me to point out how gay nick carraway and horatio are