Getting Caught In The Corner Of Someone’s Eye Is Such An Embrace, Holding The Same Vision As Them Is

every page of This is How You Lose the Time War drives me Insane

Anybody who chooses to wear their vulnerability on their sleeve, never chose to hold up a sign saying “weak”, let’s get that belief out of our systems, you’re just as strong as you were before you asked for help and after you received the guidance. THAT is the belief that remains unshakable.

You can encourage someone to believe that they can stand right back up, but not that they must always be standing regardless of how hard they’ve been hit. You need rest just as much as you need to take a stand. You have it in you to counter an issue even after something has not turned out well, but you also have to remember to sit down every once in a while because you’re not supposed to be standing all the time to fight a battle. You’re not supposed to be on guard with a sword for a hand to come at anything that goes your way. You could be sleeping, confiding in someone, baking, drawing, crying, and you’re still fighting it all the time, it isn’t the action that defines your strength, it’s your will from within that keeps you going and rooting the belief that you can, and you very much will once you’ve got your gold fish bars up and you’ve fed your cats and taken a power nap and had that bath and that milkshake and you get my point :) it doesn’t have to be so rough and tough on the exterior all the time. The clouds could be someone’s cushioned haven, but they’re still capable enough of bringing upon a storm, so what if they’re having their own time in a picnic with some rainbows and perhaps a little drizzling here and there? Let them be!

just an appreciation post for you because I’m so happy you get to read this today and I couldn’t even begin to spell out everything you had to do, or get past, to be here. Im so happy our lives intertwined in this very moment because we come to exist together <3 that is human life and you’re living it :)!

it’s ok to admit that it’s one of those moments where you’re going to have to hold yourself tight

I am giving I am continuing I am acknowledging I am breathing I am feeling I am admiring I am constantly processing my own thoughts and emotions, settling them in bit by bit and taking my time full and through even if it means I can’t meet somebody’s ends, even if it means they have to wait, even if it means they’re not ready to stay rooted through my steps. Because that’s ok. I am not leaving, I chose to stay, I chose to stay since day one and it is my place to stay firm on that decision, because that’s ok :) choose to stay for yourself, because that light of you has had plenty leave as it is, the last thing you’d wanna do is be one of them

getting anonymous hate (“just checking in” emails) from jealous haters (my professors) because of my hot takes (incredibly overdue assignments)

When my friend said “I want to hold you, I want to know you, and I want to know where you’ve been” and Vashti Bunyan said “I want to walk around your mind someday, I’d like to walk all over the things you say to me, I’d like to run and jump on your solitude, I’d like to rearrange your attitude to me, you say you just want peace and you’d never hurt anyone, you see the end before the beginning has ever begun”

We don’t know and we’re not at an authority to know what tomorrow’s consequences would bear, and it’s completely 110% ok to accept that there’s someone out there willing to sit by our side and help us through the net, to weave a heart and perhaps even a warm sweater out of it, not something that traps us in the disguise of our solitude. It’s alright to admit you’d want to reach out to a hand that helps you see through the holes of a woven mess because claiming that one wants peace and doesn’t want to act violently against another gives away more than you’d intend for it to, especially when it goes further than just wanting to restore a sense of security and support externally, it speaks about the nature you’ve been sown to, and how you can very much grow out of it, creating peace outside can only come after one has created peace within themselves :) to come to a mutual consensus with your mind and heart, collectively working together to patch through and heal each other

They’re not stepping in on your privacy but simply stopping by your doorstep to find a spot for the two of you to sit together, leaving behind a trail of palm leaves so you can feel and see the glimpses of your growth and vulnerability, not as a weakness but as a medium to communicate with yourself <3

This is the most vulnerable I’ve been the entire year, I’m seriously not over 2021 reaching its peak this quick, hold onto me a little tighter, a little longer

Taking accountability for your mistake is different from holding yourself responsible for somebody else’s wrong doing, you can sympathise and see what you’d do in their situation to help them out, but you can’t dig yourself a grave for something that doesn’t involve you at all. One shouldn't play the blame game, but know who needs to rightfully own up to face the repercussions, to realise and be honest :)