“One day it just clicks… You realise what is important and what isn’t, you learn to care less about what other people think of you and care more about what you think of yourself. You realise how far you have come and you remember thinking that things were such a mess they’d never recover and then you smile. You smile because you’re truly proud of the person you have fought to become.”
— Unknown
reapply sun screen every 2 to 3 hours. don’t use anything under 30.
korean products usually already have sunscreen in them.
use a different exfoliator for your face than you do for your body. your face needs one that’s not as aggressive
you might start to break out more upon using a new, good product. this is normal. let the bad stuff be flushed out and keep using it.
I know it’s annoying but drink. your. water.
don’t use coconut oil on your face, ESPECIALLY not if you’re prone to acne.
don’t use glossier products, the ingredients are shit.
don’t let the water in the shower hit your face too much, the pressure damages the skin.
change your pillow sheet every 3 days (oily skin) to once a week.
stop touching your face for god’s sake.
don’t forget to treat your neck too!
regularly exfoliating your hands will slow down hand aging, too.
if something doesn’t work, throw it away or gift it to someone else. don’t keep using it.
start using a serum.
matcha tea contains waaaaay more antioxidants than your average green tea.
honey & salmon are good for your skin. also limit your dairy intake.
try to (deep) cleanse your face in the evening.
and don’t forget that lasting good skin takes time and consistency. ♔
Mahmoud Darwish, from Unfortunately, It Was Paradise: Selected Poems; “The Hoopoe,”
to want and be wanted
georges bataille / emily palermo / olivia laing / @chaandajaan / georges bataille / cj hauser / @kvetchkween / @nicholasbraungf / vi khi nao / silas denver melvin
what are some of your favourite quotes about growing up? also, orange is the best colour, undisputed.
Lorde, A NOTE FROM THE DESK OF A NEWBORN ADULT
Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood
Sandra Cisneros, Eleven
Kalyn Roseanne Livernois, High Wire Darlings
John Hughes, Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Storyboarding for Linked by Air
Mitch Welling, Gentle Earth
Anaïs Nin, The Diary of Anais Nin
J. Courtney Sullivan
Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves
Me: this is hamletcore
My therapist: we actually call it clinical depression
I struggle with being socially anxious, shy and somewhat awkward and i've been told multiple times the first impression people get of me is being cold or mean eventho i'm not a rude person at all. I don't want to give that impression and i've been trying to be more chatty and extroverted. What can I do to come accross more kind and gentle? That's honestly the type of energy I want to have. I envy people with such inviting aura and vibes about them which I don't seem to have.
It’s okay to be reserved, but you should still work on your social skills.
Your facial expressions are important. When people say to smile more often, they don’t mean to stay like 😁😊 but more like 🙂. Think of nice or funny things to keep a sweet expression on your face. Smile from your eyes. “Smile”
Body language is everything. If you cross your arms often for instance, it can be seen as you being closed off and cold. Have open body language. Avoid being a wall flower and hiding in corners.
How are you with small talk? Brush up on social scripts, that’s all it is really is. Say hi to strangers when you pass by (use discernment)
Use eye contact and good posture. Don’t hang your head.
Try to get rid of your paranoia. Being self conscious is what tends to kill charisma.
Stay off of your phone, instead people watch or look at the scenery.
How do you fall back in love with life?
clean your room. clean space, uncluttered space, space that doesn’t have miasma clinging to it can work wonders. clean the dishes. sweep. take out the trash. peel the clothes off the floor and wash them, and then actually fold/hang them. take a long shower. scrub behind your knees. brush your teeth. (this can be utterly exhausting, but try to get it done in a day, if you can. the end result is worth it.)
pull out your notebook. it doesn’t need to be a new notebook, but preferably one that you don’t usually write in, or that you haven’t touched in a while. fuck moleskins. the yellow legal pad will work fine. sit in your room, or in the park, or in the library, and write a list. count clouds. describe all the colors that you see, and note patterns that arise. sketch the cracks in the walls. note the shape light makes when it enters a space. talk about what the air tastes like, smells like. what sounds are there? even the white nose, break that down: air planes, fans, cicadas, anything. remind yourself that you are sitting in the middle of a space brimming with detail. remind yourself that you are not in nothingness and emptiness. your world is fathomless. it has potential.
drink cold water and try to eat something that isn’t processed. it does not need to be fancy. buy yourself an apple with the change between your couch cushions. eat it outside. if you’re someone who walks, walk somewhere afterwards, just to stretch your legs. take your fucking meds. remember that its a good thing that you are inside your body. your body is a fantastic and endlessly intricate machine, and even though society has smacked a bunch of poisonous ideas on it, that doesn’t change its inherent worth and splendor. take care of it.
read a novel. underline your favorite lines, and write phrases that twist your heart inside your chest on the back of your hand with an ink pen. read a novel like it’s poetry. read poetry, something decadent but unpretentious. watch a movie you haven’t seen before. if there are free art galleries near you, walk through one. take your time. let yourself bask. if there are patterns in what makes your soul ache, write those patterns down – marbles arches or soot crumbling bricks or dandelions or descriptions of dresses or whatever it is, write them down.
your chosen family is important. remember, they picked you as much as you picked them. the love has no obligation. it is given freely and it is given from a place of compassion. you are not a burden. if you need to breathe, take a minute by yourself and just exist, but remember to go back to your people. when they need you, listen and be gracious. always be gracious. the universe sometimes remembers things like that.
listen to new music. link jump on youtube or related artist jump on spotify or ask the chap beside you in the cafe what their favorite band is, and listen to that. listen to something that you don’t usually listen to. we tend to tie up a lot of memory with music. we are falling in love again. the soundtrack needs to be specific to that.
allow yourself to indulge in romantics. press flowers in old books. play movies with subtitles and mouth the words. dance in your room. wear something that makes you feel good, even if you wouldn’t wear it in public. write your chosen family letters, even if you hand deliver them. write poetry, even awful poetry. revel in its awfulness. eat dark chocolate and when your chosen family want to go out, try to go out with them sometimes, even if its just to the market.
Does anyone have any tips on what programs I should look into to study French? Also any tips for studying this language. I’m thinking about studying abroad but I want to know the language and not seem like an ignorant dummy.
REINVENTING MYSELF-Femininity
Simply put, I don’t like the woman I am now. I am a manifestation of my parents neglect, insecurities rooted in me since a child, along with suppressed and very obvious trauma. I want to see better, I want to do better, I want to attract better.
In preparation for spring (the actual “New Year”) I am currently throwing away EVERYTHING and starting completely fresh. Clothes, wigs, sheets, I even thought about tossing my diploma not a soul asked me for (not even school, everything is electronic).
This is she, me. Anew
Personality
She is mysterious, yet has a welcoming aura about her. You know she’s not the woman to step to unless it’s worth her time, but intimidating isn’t the feeling that comes over the admirer. She’s playful, actively laughing and playing with her dogs. Publicly and privately. A hopeless romantic, though a seductress first. Her love (and lust) is earned. She’s very hard to get.
Hopeless Romantic
Adventurous
Rebellious
Creative
Bookworm
Athletic
Hobbies
She’s always trying something new to see if she finds something she likes. Fear of dislike is never on her mind. As a curious spirit, she not only has hobbies but works to advance and meet those who share the same hobbies as her
Art museums
Theatre
Cooking & making recipe books to pass down
Scrapbooking
Learning about nature (plants, Survival skills, history)
Baking (for anyone)
Chess
White Wine
Astrology
Teapot Collecting
Reading research articles
Boundaries
Again, she’s very hard to get. Hard to impress. Hard to convince. Hard to plead to. As warm as her aura may be, she’s very no nonsense. She is in tune with her inner voice and intuition, who are the first to advise her about whatever you’re telling her.
No sex before substantial financial/personal commitment
Limited debates, always held with class and even tone. Never arguments or fights
Not surrounding self around people who don’t share the same ambition
I come first. My safety, my priorities and myself, period.
No unannounced guests (gift deliveries excluded)
I don’t entertain conversations with men after a certain time
I am selective about what I choose to listen to, so I cut all unproductive/negative conversations very short
Goals
She is an “overachiever”. Whatever that means.
Purchase first property
Travel to 5th country
Obtaining black dermatologist
Selling select art pieces for over ($XX,XXX)
Approved for American Express Platinum Card
Accepted into Ph.D program
Complete first few books/scripts
Learn Spanish and ASL fluently
I went deep into depth privately, and I highly suggest you do the same. Sometimes, it helps to have an organized, detail breakdown of who you are, who you want to become, and most importantly who are you leaving behind.
$TufaniTalks
I just want forehead kisses