I Can't Get Over How Beautiful The Name "The City On The Edge Of Forever" Is.

For me it’s the detail that the bread Peeta gave her was full of nuts and fruit and grain, and he gave her two full loaves.

Here’s what I think:

He’s been watching her starve for weeks, powerless to help. First he thought her mom would help, then friends, then his father (who loved her mom). Finally he realizes no one is going to help this family. It’s Katniss alone against the world and she’s dying.

But what can he do? He’s 11. His family is too poor to even eat their own bakery’s bread unless it goes bad. His mother watched their resources like a hawk and she’s violent and short tempered. He’ll only get one chance and he needs to make it count.

He starts planning. He’s only going to get one chance and he needs to make it count. It’ll be logistically easier to give her bread than game or produce and he knows she can make it last longer too. He looks around and thinks about which bread to give her. First he wonders which one she’ll like the most but then he realizes no, it needs to be as calorie-dense as possible because he will not get another shot. So he picks their densest loaf, really it’s more of a fruitcake, and he starts to plan how to get it to her.

Then one day he hears his mom screaming at her for going through their empty trash. It breaks his heart but he knows this is his chance. He runs to the fire and dumps some freshly cooling bread straight into the flames.

Everyone just thinks that hozier vibes are just cottage core with trees and animals and all that stuff, but i raise you Hozier's album vibes being:

Self titled: a beautifully old pub, with random guys in the corner screaming laughter with beers on their hands, a beautiful group of women happy in a table at the centre and a guy alone on one of the stools writing his diary

Wasteland, baby: a destroyed town due to some man made disaster and all that's left are ashes of what was once there and a couple that just fell for each other coming back to see what's left of it

Unreal Unearth: well maintained but abandoned cathedral at night with its affreschi coming off, a broken painting in the corner, and infinite history underneath it, a guy looking at all of it right after having his heart broken for the first time

i'm still not over and will never be over logan practically bounding and slashing the steel door down bc he couldn't let wade die. he couldn't lose him. not after everything they've just been through. not everyone can say they saved the timelines by having a guy rip a door apart piece by piece to hold your hand and become a singular anchor.

Can you imagine? Can you IMAGINE? Carrying the pain of loving him so absolutely, so irrevocably, and also the regret of never having truly given yourself to him. So years pass and you just watch him grow old and die, knowing you have a hundred years more to live and yet, you hold onto the pain, because it carries all the memories and emotions that you spent so long denying. In the end, you know that it is the only thing you have of him, an admition, a surrender, too late.

And then you find yourself in another timeline all together, where you and him are so young, so hopeful, but also, so naive, so easily fooled. Now you have to watch yourself pulling away from him all over again, deying everything, pretending not to love or hurt. And you just want to shake that younger version and scream: "You don't have that much time! Stop leaving him behind and hold him while you still can".

But you cannot. This is not your universe, and you have already fucked their lives up so much, how could you also tamper with this? So you step aside and let them discover it in their own time, hoping they have much more than you did. Clinging to the pain and memories once more, all you have left is the hope that someday, when your body is too tired to keep on living, he is waiting for you, and you will never have to be apart again.

also. something about the deadpool movies that i really appreciate is that even underneath all the gratuitous violence and the dick jokes, the characters actually give a shit about each other. it's silly and over the top and chaotic but it's still heartfelt. "why would i give a fuck about the world when my entire world is in this picture." laura's quiet pep talk with logan. logan throwing himself into a bolted metal door over and over again trying to save a guy who's been annoying him since the second they met. wade asking the TVA to fix logan's timeline so he can have his family back and then, failing that, inviting him to come live with him. it kills me. twelve years ago i wanted to see superheroes getting shawarma and then actually staying friends afterward and in 2024 deadpool and wolverine finally gave it to me. i love this stupid silly movie so much dude

Fanfolks today need to remember how important The Premise was.

Y'all have heard of The Premise, right?

See, historically there have always been people who saw an extra layer of gayness on certain pairs of fictional people (you just thought of several), and people Back Then even wrote their own fanfic (or as they were called at the time, "pastiches"), but the first widespread queer fanwork to really define the fanfiction genre was KIRK AND SPOCK. Kirk/Spock. K/S. The very first slashfics.

Why this work was vastly, overwhelmingly written by straight women is a discussion for another time, but it was, so that's the main perspective I'm gonna consider here.

How do you - a statistically middle-class, 30+, stay-at-home wife and mother - how do you write slashfic ao3-style in the 1960's before the internet?

Carefully.

Through letters with friends, phone calls, pen pals, and sometimes - sometimes - clandestine meetings of small groups. Whole novels were written communally, round-robin style, by sending typed or handwritten additions chapter by chapter to each other. These were all underground, some deep underground; even the early Trekkie fanzines of the time wouldn't touch them.

And keep in mind, few of these stories were explicitly even sexual! But they were all about a very, very close relationship between two men. In the 1960's.

Guess how cool everyone else was about this.

Actually, for their part, Gene Rodenberry and the other writers were fine with it, saying that they had deliberately written the characters to be two halves of a whole, and if you wanna read it that way, yeah sure, go right ahead. Shatner and Nimoy took it all in good humor, and seemingly still do, each guy basically gesturing to the other and chuckling "I mean, who wouldn't?"

(CORRECTION: At least, they did until Nimoy passed away in 2015. Thanks @richie-is-rich!)

But elsewhere there was vicious backlash against The Premise, and not just within the fandom. This was still at a time in the US and UK when various "sodomy" and "decency" laws made no distinction between homosexual sex acts and just, like, directly lighting another man's cigarette with your cigarette in public. (That, sadly, is not a fucking joke.)

It was probably the closest some suburban cishet women came to understanding the pain of being in the closet. They had to protect this secret from their friends and family at all cost. There were cases of divorces where women lost custody of their children because their writing had come to light.

Can you imagine having such a burning desire to write for your OTP that you were willing to lose everything over it? Even if you were never caught, you still had to be willing to wait weeks, months, to receive a letter in the mail that you had to carefully intercept, read in secret, and then add your own chapter t, also in secret, and then send off, perhaps never to be seen again.

These people were goddamn heroes, and they laid the foundation for the world we live in today. A world where we can read, write, comment on, or share - in a matter of seconds! - literature about two background characters from two different franchises enjoying a really specific kink involving vacuums or something. And that's objectively amazing.

Raise a toast to our fanfiction elders, who simped in the darkness so we could simp in the light of day.

Everyone wants to talk about how they fucked in the Honda Odyssey, but I want to talk about the sloppy makeout they had after destroying the Time Ripper.

Like, I'm sorry but Wade and Logan had a little moment where they each tried to go in to spare the other, and then Logan was yelling for Wade to come back and that he's going to die while banging on the glass desperately??

Wade doing everything he can to keep Logan out of danger, while Logan is using all his strength to get to Wade!?? And them linking hands?? Logan losing his shirt and Wade approving of his abs and v-line.

You CANNOT tell me they didn't crawl out of the rubble into each other's arms and in the heat of the moment sloppily making out because they're both still alive and they're glad the other is alive.

They were committed in that moment and I'm so proud of them.

hello dark mode users :)

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🔭

What if I was all wrong about the "SINNER REPENT" wall writing. What if it isn't a manifestation of the social attitudes of the 1960s (compulsory heterosexuality, gender binary, etc.). What if, like Spock's message of "LOVE MANKIND," Jim's message also speaks to a hidden fear? A fear that is not the breaking of a social taboo (be it a captain's duty and Starfleet regulations, an affair, non-heterosexual love, etc.), but a haunting thought from Jim's past: that he should not be alive, that his continued existence breaks the order of life itself by cheating a certain death. Hence, the use of the words "SINNER REPENT," a phrase that matches how Kodos moralized basic survival needs to justify his eugenics and massacre on Tarsus IV.

?????????