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Mischa Bachinski X Noel Gruber - Blog Posts

2 years ago

Ride the Cyclone Incorrect Quotes (pt. 2)

Noel: I don’t do relationships.

Mischa: *exists*

Noel: Shit.

~

Noel: Hey, I’m getting in the shower. Wanna help me out?

Mischa: ..Have you never taken a shower before?

~

Ocean: Just be yourself.

Noel: 'Be myself'? Ocean, I have one day to win Mischa over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

Ricky: Couple weeks.

Constance: Six months.

Jane Doe: Jury’s still out.

Noel: See, Ocean?

Noel: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

~

Ocean: From now on we will be using code names.

Ocean: You can address me as Eagle One.

Ocean: Noel is “been there done that”.

Ocean: Ricky is “currently doing that”.

Ocean: Constance is “it happened once in a dream”.

Ocean: Jane Doe is “if I had to pick a gal”.

Ocean: And Mischa is...

Ocean: Eagle Two

Mischa: Oh thank god.

~

Ocean: I CAN'T DO IT!

Noel, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!

Ocean: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

Mischa: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Ocean:

Ocean: I appreciate it,

Ocean: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

Ricky: Ocean-

Ocean: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Constance: Ocean we gotta-

Ocean: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Ocean: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Ocean, motioning to Jane Doe: NOT FUCKING THIS

~

Ocean: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Noel: What if it bites me and it dies!?

Mischa: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Noel, learn to listen.

Ricky: What if it bites itself and I die?

Constance: That’s voodoo.

Jane Doe: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Noel: That’s correlation, not causation.

Ricky: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Constance: That’s kinky.

Ocean: Oh my God.


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