Good Omens Headcannons - Blog Posts

How Aziraphale and Crowley would propose to each other: (part 1)

yall we all know Crowley would freak out about it for ages

he would have every little detail meticulously planned out months in advance like the romantic he really is

Aziraphale totally knew he was going to propose for ages (Crowley literally left the business pamphlet for the engagement photographer on the bookshop table by accident on two separate occasions)

he spent hours arguing with the ringsmith to make sure that the ring was PERFECT

inscribed on it in looping cursive is the phrase "my world"

one spring morning Aziraphale woke up to find a note next to his pillow that just read 'Angel - Berkeley square. 2:00.'

(Crowley had re-written that note over 30 times, attempts ranging from a page long love letter to two words on a piece of otherwise blank paper.)

Aziraphale, of course, made sure to wear his best outfit for the occasion, seeing as Crowley was probably the least-subtle being in the universe when it came to secret proposal planning.

Crowley's speech was hesitant at first, like he half expected to be turned down, but as he began speaking the words he had prepped and scrapped and written over and over again, his confidence grew until he was able to meet Aziraphale's eyes and see the blazing in his Angel's expression.

In the end, he forgot most of what he had planned to say, and just started saying what he felt was right.

Crowley: We've known each other a long time - we're a group, a team. A team of the two of us. And we've spent our entire existence pretending that we're not...apart from these last few years, which have been the best years of my life...Angel? Make me the happiest demon in the world, which, I know, is basically like asking you to make me the fastest sloth, but I -

Aziraphale: Oh Crowley...oh Crowley, Yes.

Crowley: ...Yes?

Azriaphale: Yes.

good omens characters I would trust with my car (if I had one)

Who I would let borrow my car:

Crowley. That demon would take care of my car - I'm talking pristine seats, clean glovebox, the shiniest it's ever been. He would claim that he wasn't doing it to be nice (he's not nice) and complain about how dirty it was before but we all know the truth. All my CD's would probably be mysteriously replaced with Queen (if he has to listen to it all time, so does everybody else.) There would be 17 parking tickets in 5 different languages on the dash. When you get the car back you realise that you gave it to him with a nearly empty tank but for some reason he didn't seem to refill it? And it worked perfectly fine???

Aziraphale. Look we both know when I get it back it'll be bright yellow and probably look like it's off a 60s sitcom but I mean look at his FACE is that the kind of face you could say no to? Yeah, I don't think so. He would be all "pretty please could I borrow your beautiful car" and the keys would be his. I don't blame Crowley for letting him drive the Bentley I would also forfeit all my mortal possessions to this angel.

Anathema. She wouldn't ask she'd just grab my keys and be like "I'll be back at 6:02" and who am I to question it? it would be 6:02 exactly and the car would turn up in my driveway covered in dirt. where did all the dirt come from??? I don't think I want to know. There would be a sticky note on the dashboard with a cryptic prophecy involving an elaborate generation-long ruse and today's wordle answer. would I let her borrow it again? probably.

Who I would not let borrow my car:

Newton Pulsifer. This man would rename my car words that haven't even been invented yet. He would've used my number plate to sign up for a Spanish inquisition fanclub. Heaven forbid that I have a Bluetooth speaker inside (it would turn into a green tooth speaker or something I swear.) The car would end up in a ditch in the neighbour's cornfield. He would offer me toast as an apology.

Sergeant Shadwell. Let's just say he uses the buses for a reason.

Archangel Gabriel. My radio would exclusively play bible stations from now on. The car would glow pure white and float above the ground. He would get pulled over for going 3km on the motorway. His driver's license would say 'human Gabriel who's a completely normal human being. profession: definitely not archangel of heaven. (that'll fool 'em guys) age: human. He would sit and watch the windscreen wipers go back and forward for 5 hours like a cat.

Good Omens heacannons: GIFTS EDITION

Crowley likes to give Aziraphale things from nature, mainly flowers and occasionally one of his houseplants (he claims that the bookshop had more sun for the plants, or that the flowers were given to him by his neighbour and he was going to throw them out) (Aziraphale knows the truth, though)

Aziraphale tends to lean towards more man-made gifts, especially sweet treats that he buys or even makes himself - after all, it was Crowley who first introduced him to food, so isn't it fitting that Aziraphale gives him something similar)

both of them love music, and will often dig up records and CDs of songs that they think the other will enjoy

they don't really announce those type of gifts, but Crowley will place a record (not bebop) in Aziraphale's gramophone/record player thingy, and Aziraphale will pop a new CD into the Bentley stereo

it makes them both so happy, doing these little things for each other, and they both blush adorably when receiving the same love and attention back <3

Bentley headcannons: PART 2 BABYYYY

Crowley brought her from new in 1934

this also happened to be the year where driving tests were made mandatory in England

Crowley was so mad that in protest he brought the Bentley and proceeded to drive her at increasingly high speeds around central London

he still hasn't gotten a proper drivers licence to this day (don't tell Aziraphale that though)

Although Crowley has only put petrol in her once, after hearing the saying 'you wouldn't put a soft drink into a car and expect it to run' (this was meant to encourage people to drink more water, though, really, cars can't run on water either...)

Crowley decided to pour 2 whole litres of diet coke into the Bentley and see what happened (he survived for over 5 miles on sheer power of will)

There's always a book in the glove compartment just in case Aziraphale gets bored

currently, it's The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde, but before that it used to be Pride and Prejudice (Crowley read the first couple of chapters of that one and pretended to annoyed by it, but a few days later Aziraphale saw him sneaking back into the car to keep reading it)

He fell asleep in the Bentley once, and when he woke up he realized she had shifted his seat back so he wouldn't get a cramped neck from sitting upright all night <3

SNEK HATS

this has probably been done before BUT Aziraphale makes these little snake hats for Crowley

you know the ones...

Even More Good Omens Headcannons:

so we know that Hell has a photo of Crowley and Aziraphale shaking hands in 1941, which they attempted to threaten them with

BUT hear me out:

Beelzebub had known Crowley was 'fraternising' with an angel since Rome...

they didn't usually make time to visit Earth, but that Archangel Gabriel was sent down to observe some human thing or another, and really, they couldn't let an agent of heaven have the run of the place, could they?

and while they were there, totally not spying on the Archangel's activities in fly form, they happened to see the demon Crowley speaking with the angel of the eastern gate, Azifela or whatever his name was

they brushed it aside though, confident that it was just another one of Crowley's elaborate temptation plans (several of which Beelzebub had been forced to sit through tedious presentations of)

They thought nothing of it, until a couple of centuries later, when Beelzebub had just popped over to France to watch the revolution play out (well, to watch the guillotine play out - they didn't much care about sides as long the decapitating got done)

and, of course, sensing an angelic presence in the Bastille, they had to check it out (because what if it was Gabriel??)

...

It turned out to be that Aziraphale fellow, who had somehow gotten himself all tied up in a revolution that had absolutely nothing to do with him at all, and Crowley was there with him! And they were b a n t e r i n g

like they were friends or something

which was ridiculous - an angel and a demon couldn't be friends, no matter how hard they tried

and say what you will about Beelzebub, but they're a demon with professional standards, so they snapped a picture of the pair having crepes together (crepes? really) (side note: cameras were definitely invented during the french revolution no need to look it up no really don't google it)

so, yes, over the centuries, Beelzebub had collected enough evidence of Crowley and Aziraphale's...friendship, arrangement, whatever you wanted to call it, to make sure the both of them were sufficiently...dealt with by their respective head offices

but something stopped them from turning in the photographs

maybe it was the spread of compassion they still had buried deep, deep down within their demonic heart

or maybe it was the fact, the feeling, that if Aziraphale and Crowley could do it, become friends against all odds, maybe Gabriel and Beelzebub had a better chance then they thought

good omens headcannon: THE BENTLEY EDITION

and yes, I've fully committed to the Bentley being a sentient entity

we all know this car is Aziracrow's child a (they have a custody agreement)

Crowley gets worried that the Bentley loves Aziraphale more than him (Aziraphale will neither confirm nor deny) so sometimes he'll randomly treat the her to of those really fancy deep cleans where they get all shiny and nice

he calls it her 'spa day'

although the Bentley loves Queen, she has recently taken a liking to Hozier as well

one time when Crowley was brooding during a drive she played From Eden and made him cry

she made sure she had tissues always stocked in the glove box from then on

The Bentley has a secret playlist she plays whenever Aziraphale and Crowley are driving together

it's called "dads <3"

the very last song on it is A Nightingale Sang in Barkley Square

headcannon time:

the whole time Aziraphale was pretending to be the gardener for Warlock's family Crowley was just...fixing the plants for him

like I love Aziraphale dearly but that angel cannot garden

everything is either over-watered or as dry as a literal desert

Crowley is fighting for both their jobs over here

he's just running around on his breaks trying desperately to keep the plants alive without Aziraphale or the Dowling's noticing

because he would never let his angel realise he's killing the plants

good omens: WEDDING EDITION (part 1)

yeah that's right; below is my idea for the perfect Aziracrow wedding <3

they argue for ages about the venue until they see a news article saying that South Downs in England has officially re-introduced native nightingales into the area

and I mean, after seeing that, could they get married anywhere else?

Crowley in a dress.

a beautiful black lacy dress, complete with tall silver heels (not that he needs the extra height)

Aziraphale has a tartan bowtie, of course

they're both wearing a green carnation pinned to their lapels (Aziraphale got the idea from his dear friend Oscar)

when Aziraphale goes to walk down the aisle, time almost seems to slow down (and maybe it does; who knows?)

he's almost glowing a soft golden colour from the sheer joy

he gives the impression of a sunrise - warm, peaceful, and filled with hope for the coming day

Crowley, on the other hand, looks like a sunset

bold, elegant, and strong, never quiet the same from day to day, but with a hint of pink some nights, splashes of purples and blues on others - the kind of breathtaking view that makes you stop and watch for a while

standing together, they look like they were made for each (which, of course, they were)

not night and day, exactly, nor twilight and dusk, but the gorgeous bursts of colour that paint the earth's skies to celebrate the dawn of a new time and the completion of a finished one

even Gabriel and Beelzebub (who weren't on the list but showed up anyway) had to admit that they looked lovely

behind the archway is a delicate, shining stain glass window that depicts (in the most accurate detail you will ever find) the garden of Eden

if you look very closely, you might spot a couple of black scales amongst the branches of an apple tree, or a gleaming white feather or two

the archway that the couple is standing under is decorated with roses, some of which are colours that any gardening enthusiasts attending are pretty sure don't exist, or at least, haven't been discovered yet

on the left side the roses are a gorgeous, glossy black

on the right side, the roses are a fluffy, sun-catching white

as the roses get closer to the middle of the archway, they form a gradient, from black and white to a very light and a very dark grey

and right in the middle, hanging above the pair when they kiss, the roses are almost the colour of stars on a clear night