Oh My God I Have So Many Thoughts On Changing Your Last Name After Marriage

oh my god I have so many thoughts on changing your last name after marriage

my husband and I had a thousand discussions about it and ended up deciding to hyphenate our names. no, not just me. he was Mr X, I was Ms Y - now he's Mr X-Y and I'm Mrs X-Y

the rationale behind that was that if marriage is a creation of new family from two existing ones, then both families should be reflected in the surname. I said that if he's not changing his surname, I will stay with mine as well. he actively chose changing his surname

we also discussed not changing our names and having potential kids named X-Y but that felt weird.

I said I don't want to change my name to his because my name is a part of my life and person. zero objections

our surnames are in different languages so it's very clear which surname came from him and which from me

and oh my god. the number of people who will disregard his new surname and call him Mr X is astounding. even when he corrects them and says his name is X-Y, they just say "yeah, sure". some will even double down on calling him X. he said it's a great test for meeting new people. some men treat his decision to change his name like an open warfare on their masculinity.

meanwhile, guess how many people referred to me by my previous name? that's right, 0, everyone respects the husband's added name.

we had people react to our names enthusiastically, like at a bank - these were all women.

there is no point to this story, just that society's views on names and marriages are weird

it's crazy how many super duper patriarchal things get retroactively justified in the name of being about love. yeah I'm sure women taking their husbands surname has always 100% been about recovering from trauma and distancing yourself from abusive family or whatever and has absolutely nothing at all to do with women being seen as property. great work here everyone, marriage as a concept has been redeemed through the power of pop psychology

More Posts from Zirrah-writes and Others

2 weeks ago
Mfw I Think I Did A Good Zille Deal And Then Smolak Says 'thank You For Your Generosity'

mfw i think i did a good Zille deal and then Smolak says 'thank you for your generosity'


Tags
1 week ago

if I'm getting off the elevator and the door opens and you're standing RIGHT THERE in the middle of the fucking door 3 mm away from me

assume I will walk into you

gtfo of my way


Tags
1 week ago

European Australia - had it muted to listen to the Polish entry but looked like a generic angsty guy song?

UK - Spice Girls? The Schuyler Sisters? the more I'm watching, the more it's growing on me. strangely captivating

Greece - early impression: you cannot perform a funky song in glasses. I need Eurovision songs to be insane

Lithuania - didn't deliver on the initial weird impression :( makes me think of Rush of Blood to The Head era Coldplay

Eurovision semifinals liveblogging

Australia - appropriately insane, approved

Montenegro - very artsy which is not what I expect from a Eurovision song

Ireland - praise Laika, approved

Latvia - I see the vision but not the eurovision

Armenia - I feel like I'm watching an Imagine Dragons video (derogatory)


Tags
2 weeks ago

if Albin Clavin was the people's choice after me, no need to orchestrate an assassination, I'd kms out of sheer embarassment

the sovereign update for the main game with the economy chart pop out and the status at the top is making me just giddy w how good at Modern Art with Symon Holl i am.

2 weeks ago

if there's at least one note at this post, I'll start writing a Symon Holl/OC (me) smooshin booties


Tags
1 week ago

eurovision turns me into a conspiracy theorist because I fully believe this shit was rigged to give Israel a win


Tags
1 week ago

I'll be the first to admit my OC is who I aspire to be lmao can't a girl dream

me: hmm, why did I make this OC in the first place? OC: well-- me: *senses a sudden creeping horror* WAIT DON'T ANSWER THAT


Tags
Loading...
End of content
No more pages to load
  • beththebubbly
    beththebubbly reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • beththebubbly
    beththebubbly liked this · 1 week ago
  • femboypussy420
    femboypussy420 reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • fuckidyfuckidyfuck
    fuckidyfuckidyfuck reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • redroasary
    redroasary liked this · 1 week ago
  • vvanillavveins
    vvanillavveins liked this · 1 week ago
  • mocha-marshmellow
    mocha-marshmellow liked this · 1 week ago
  • markacademia
    markacademia liked this · 1 week ago
  • pixiefemmeinist
    pixiefemmeinist liked this · 1 week ago
  • roughfiend
    roughfiend liked this · 1 week ago
  • floppachoppass
    floppachoppass liked this · 1 week ago
  • matsunehiku144
    matsunehiku144 liked this · 1 week ago
  • lemonitswednesday
    lemonitswednesday liked this · 1 week ago
  • heartofaspen
    heartofaspen liked this · 1 week ago
  • geek-and-destroy
    geek-and-destroy liked this · 1 week ago
  • sarkofagos
    sarkofagos liked this · 1 week ago
  • warmibuprofen
    warmibuprofen liked this · 1 week ago
  • jazzw4ve
    jazzw4ve liked this · 1 week ago
  • quarksoupart
    quarksoupart liked this · 1 week ago
  • fag-lore
    fag-lore liked this · 1 week ago
  • th4t-g4y-fr0g
    th4t-g4y-fr0g reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • duck-in-a-hoodie
    duck-in-a-hoodie liked this · 1 week ago
  • solaceish
    solaceish liked this · 1 week ago
  • docmothra
    docmothra reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • mothssoup
    mothssoup reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • mothssoup
    mothssoup liked this · 1 week ago
  • hillosanation
    hillosanation reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • novacm
    novacm liked this · 1 week ago
  • blahblahblahsomethingunique
    blahblahblahsomethingunique liked this · 1 week ago
  • ineedafuckinqnap
    ineedafuckinqnap liked this · 1 week ago
  • boy-in-a-flower-crown
    boy-in-a-flower-crown liked this · 1 week ago
  • laura-hey
    laura-hey liked this · 1 week ago
  • em0bussy
    em0bussy liked this · 1 week ago
  • potnialabyrinthoio95
    potnialabyrinthoio95 liked this · 1 week ago
  • feuangfa
    feuangfa reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • feuangfa
    feuangfa liked this · 1 week ago
  • divinebongwater
    divinebongwater liked this · 1 week ago
  • icantfindmychashma
    icantfindmychashma liked this · 1 week ago
  • oopsthispersondoesntexist
    oopsthispersondoesntexist liked this · 1 week ago
  • beyondinfin1te
    beyondinfin1te liked this · 1 week ago
  • boredsphinx
    boredsphinx liked this · 1 week ago
  • kuricurri
    kuricurri liked this · 1 week ago
  • thymes-herb-garden
    thymes-herb-garden reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • crowtidestrider
    crowtidestrider liked this · 1 week ago
  • m-eowdy
    m-eowdy liked this · 1 week ago
  • this-machine-runs-on-coffee
    this-machine-runs-on-coffee liked this · 1 week ago
  • sirenvrse
    sirenvrse reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • sirenvrse
    sirenvrse liked this · 1 week ago
  • r0tt3n-esque
    r0tt3n-esque liked this · 1 week ago
zirrah-writes - zirrah
zirrah

K | she/her | 20s | I'm my own biggest fan | ao3: zirrah | random obsessions: Suzerain | Severance | Fox Mulder | Mass Effect

40 posts

Explore Tumblr Blog
Search Through Tumblr Tags