being an only child and not close with your parents is hard when you love talking and can’t keep your mouth shut and are constantly making jokes. like i’ve always just kinda talked to myself since i had no one to talk to and now being think i’m weird. i cant be the only one who will have full on conversations out loud with only myself, right?
bring back the habits that made you happy as a child. there’s no reason you should ever have to give up harmless things that bring you joy. you don’t have to age out of having fun. finger paint. write mediocre fanfiction and questionable poetry. put chocolate chips in your waffles. sing in the bath, and while working in the yard, and while washing your hands. hammer tunelessly on a piano. spin in circles until you fall down. climb a tree. just because you’re now in charge of your life doesn’t mean you’re expected to give up on the things that make life feel worth living
to whoever i end up with:
i want to share a shower with you. i want to share soaps with you. i want to be constantly running out of soaps because we use each other's soaps. i want to smell my soaps on you.
i want to sit on the train with you late at night leaning on each other and listening to music. i want to be drinking coffee and stroking your hair.
i want to hit you whenever you crack a stupid joke.
i want to make movies about you.
i want to write journals about you.
i want you to wake up while i'm still sleeping and read until i wake up to see how many chapters you can read before i wake up. probably a lot. i wake up really late.
i want to write things for you. good things. not things like this. i want to write things that make you understand how much i adore you but i'm bad with words but i promise i'm trying. i'm really trying.
Just saw Oppenheimer and I’m legitimately so impressed with the understanding of physics demonstrated in that movie.
My favorite example is the “near zero” probability the atomic bomb sets off a chain reaction that incinerates the atmosphere. Everyone else hears that and freaks out. But the physicists see this and are just like “oh yeah that’s fine, best case scenario honestly”
As a physics grad with a strong interest in the fields of atomic and nuclear physics, as well as their history, this movie was a treat :)
help
One day I promise you, you're not going to miss him forever. As much as his memories keep on resurfacing every now and then, there will be a day when everything will stop and your emotions will just change towards him. I mean, you won't start hating him instead of loving him the way you do now. You will just stop feeling for him. I know that you still wait for him to text you even when you are asleep. Part of you is awake waiting for him to call you. I know you miss him so much that your bones hurt. I know you miss him so much that it just feels a little more empty every day. I promise you are not going to be this sad forever. I know your heart aches all the time. I know you loved him, you still do and maybe you will always love him. But you can keep on loving someone until that love feels like it's pulling you down. When you feel that, let that feeling leave you. It's okay to stop having feelings for him, it's okay to just be neutral towards him. You don't have to starve yourself of things that he wasn't able to give you. One day you're going to move on and it's going to be the most beautiful thing that could happen to you after he broke your heart. Until then, remember to be soft on yourself. Remember to be a wreck and don't be afraid of spilling your emotions. Be a mess, be with big feelings and you can cry in public, too. We are all a mess but how we manage to handle ourselves is what makes us better than others.
-Talesofmaya via Instagram
It hurts when you know what it feels like to love, but don't know what it feels like to be loved.
I told my brother I couldn’t sleep and he told me to watch something boring so, did you guys knew stars have different light colors? Actually red light stars are that color because since they are in the cool and bloated stage of their evolution they are more dense, therefore can dominate the infrared light. Still awake though.
last night as i was falling asleep i was thinking about the beauty of loving someone in any form and just wanting things with them without any ulterior motives or any other goal. like wanting to be around someone because you love them and want them in your life, not because they can do something for you, wanting to make someone food or make things for them in general not because you expect something in return but because you want them to eat well and to be happy. wanting to hold someone just because you want them close and want to make them feel safe and warm. wanting to wash someones hair because you love them and want to take care of them. anyway i think its really sweet and beautiful how a lot of times when we love someone we do things like this
the fact that i'm not in some alternate universe where i go to this school wearing pretty clothes, i'm creeping down it's hallways on a rainy day and me and my friends are dancing in circles as fellow students sing pretentious poetry and this pretty stranger is falling in love with me because i'm constantly saying strange and unpleasant things (which are a part of my charm) is so fucked up.
in my sylvia plath, tortured poet, the lakes, jo march, dead poets society, albert camus, folklore, evermore, metamorphosis, dostovesky era