I Have My Doubts That Akutagawa Would Be Able To Tell Atsushi “I Love You”, Like, Ever. But - And

I have my doubts that Akutagawa would be able to tell Atsushi “I love you”, like, ever. But - and you gotta meet me halfway with this one - I think his equivalent to it would be staying silent when his thousandth snarky remark or insult or aggression of the day comes, and make the effort to let it die on his tongue instead of hurting Atsushi.

Because that is in Akutagawa. Because he's evil and only made to hurt, because love has never and will never come natural to him. Because it's his nature to harm others, because he can't help it even if he didn't want to. And it's foolish to think he'll suddenly become a good person after getting together with Atsushi; Atsushi knows that.

But this one time– this one time, he can love Atsushi the only way he can. He won't give in to the temptation of reprimanding Atsushi when he trips on a mission. He won't maliciously comment on the fact that he's all messy and disheveled. If Atsushi asks him to do something, he will swallow the bitter impulse of crudely telling him off, and do as he says– just this time. Because for someone who's survived all his life on animal instincts and irrational impulses, maybe the greatest act of love he can manage is putting the beast to sleep for a little time. This time, even though it might not be what I was created for, I'll love you.

More Posts from Theghostinabadbook and Others

4 months ago

I often hear the argument that Luffy is dumb, and I can't help but be ticked off every time I hear someone say it, because Luffy isn't dumb, he's simply carefree. And I mean that in the literal sense of the word. Luffy truly does not have a care in the world. Luffy chooses not to complicate things. He does things for the simple fact of wanting to and he purposely refuses to learn about people, situations, and the nuances involved with both because the nuance just pollutes the true nature of the subjects. Luffy doesn't choose to do these things out of ignorance or selfishness, but because in the grand scheme of things, all the information that he chooses to ignore is wholly unimportant both by Luffy's own standards and to the development of the story as well. What Luffy deems unimportant does not matter at all to how things play out in the anime.

Luffy, at his core, is an incredible judge of character. Luffy's relationship with Tama is a perfect example of this. By all accounts Luffy's first impression of Tama should have been negative. She came off as a little bit mean and stand-offish. However, Luffy in his natural Luffy-fashion is unbothered. He didn't need Tama to tell him or show him explicitly the kind of person she was to understand her as a person. Despite the fact that she was a little girl, Luffy treated her with basic respect right off the bat. Luffy didn't see her as child, but rather as the self-sufficient human she was. Of course his fondness for her was only furthered by the food that Tama gave him. Luffy didn't need to know anything more about Tama after he heard that she had given him her last shares of food. He didn't need to hear Tama's sad story to understand her. She treated him with kindness, like she would a friend, even though they had just met. Luffy would go to the ends of the earth for her over that simple fact. He had no desire to learn of Wano's history to better understand how Tama got to this point in her life. All he needed to do and all thay he wanted to do was return a kindness. And that he did.

The same can be said for the part Luffy plays in Nami's story. When Nami 'betrayed' Luffy, he'd simply brushed it off. Once again, Luffy knew who Nami was without having to ask and without her having to show him explicitly. Luffy saw her 'betrayal' yet did not take it at face value. Luffy refuses to leave her behind because everything Nami had said/done in that situation muddled Luffy's inherent and instinctive understanding of her character. This next bit is ironic to say because Luffy often makes decisions with his stomach rather than his head, but its clear that Luffy would rather trust his gut feeling than try to understand Nami's actions which appeared entirely contradictory to Luffy's perception of her personality/character.

This theme rings true throughout the whole anime. This happens when Luffy chooses to trust Law on Punk Hazard over Law's rather dubious choices without needing or wanting an explanation from him. This happens when he rescues Zoro at the very beginning of the anime and he simply trusts this well-known pirate hunter not to cut him down right of the post. I beg of you all, please do not dilute Luffy's complex character design down to something so trivial as him simply "being stupid".

Sorry for the tangent, I have just always felt people who say this about Luffy sell him and his whole character design short. There is so much more that I could say about this too. I could go into detail about the ways in which Luffy is as smart as the rest of the crew (in different ways than them obviously), but that would call for several more paragraphs, so I'll just cut it here I think.

Anyways tell me what y'all think, I'm curious.


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2 months ago
A drawing of Sanji and Usopp from One Piece. They are surrounded by arrows and text. 

Sanji's text connected to the arrow that points towards Usopp reads: 

"I wish I could be as human as you, I don't want to be a monster"

followed by the text above Usopp reading: 

"The platonic opposite of his brothers: if to be an inhuman monster is to have fear and compassion be the first things removed from your heart, the mortality of fear and the kindness of compassion is what makes the most human of us all (I don't want to become like them; I'd rather stay like you)"

Usopp's text connected to the arrow that points towards Sanji reads:

"I wish I could be as strong as you, I don't want to be a mere human"

followed by the text above Sanji reading:

"The platonic ideal of the strong protector/warrior, knight in shining armor, someone who is naturally strong, someone who keeps putting himself in harms way for you and for others (no matter how hard I try I'll never be like you, I'll never be able to catch up)"

Below both of them, the first comment reads: 

"I hate who I am, I'd rather be like you = I am worthless if I am not helpful / of service"

Below that, this leads to Sanji's quote from Enies Lobby: "I'll do what you can't, and you'll do what I can't"

Below that, the two final paragraphs read:

"Being weak and surrounded by much stronger peers whom I could never catch up to, and tying my sense of self-worth to this lack of comparative strength has done irreparable damage to my psyche, and you're the only one who can understand."

and

"I saw my mother lie ill on her bed for ages, until death and sickness took her when I was like 6-7. I am definitely not marked by this forever and also I see her every time I run into a mirror. Do not ask me about my complex relationship with my father(s). Or what it means to live up to their legacy."

THE "ZORO MIGHT BE SANJI'S MIRROR / RIVAL / SHADOW, BUT USOPP IS HIS FOIL" META.


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2 months ago

Looking at Iceman in the new Storm Bringer chapter I am suddenly struck with the headcanon that Hirotsu was his mentor, and I don't understand how I didn't see this earlier.

It's not just the outfits, which are very similar (I'm definitely headcanoning the scarf was a gift from Hirotsu now) but also their body language now we can see it.

I mean, look at their introduction panels next to each other.

Looking At Iceman In The New Storm Bringer Chapter I Am Suddenly Struck With The Headcanon That Hirotsu
Looking At Iceman In The New Storm Bringer Chapter I Am Suddenly Struck With The Headcanon That Hirotsu

"No I can't stand with the group, I've got to go smoke and look cool and mysterious in the corner"

Hirotsu's monocle being over the same eye as Iceman's scar.

Iceman's hair being pushed back like he's trying to imitate Hirotsu's style.

What if Iceman's sixth sense for when someone is about to activate their ability and talent for making anything into a weapon comes from the fact his mentor's ability was being able to repel anything thrown at him?


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5 months ago

i feel like some people are missing the point of these "deaths" a little. like i know the previous arc's death baits don't help my point but i really don't think anyone is suppose to read the ADA deaths as permanent .. especially since fyodor and atsushi don't even do that. they both acknowledge the page and how to can undo everything. the point isn't for this to be the end of these characters stories but to use them show how 1) atsushi handles the intense trauma and stress of watching his family die in front of him and the pressure on him to get the page and undo it and 2) see how atsushi handles this situation since this is one of the few times he is completely on his own with no assistance, no plans and no fall back options.

now obviously i know akutagawa will likely get back into the fight too because of the s5 ending but id still say a lot of this is very reliant on atsushi since this isn't the same akutagawa he knows.

i mean, fukuzawa literally says this

I Feel Like Some People Are Missing The Point Of These "deaths" A Little. Like I Know The Previous Arc's

i know many people aren't enjoying this arc, they want skk back, they want back smaller scale conflicts, they want the ADA dynamics back, but people have also wanted atsushi to take back his place as the MC and this is setting up such a perfect opportunity to show atsushi's strength.


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3 months ago

Crack concept: Akutugawa hears Dazai’s “my new partner is better” speech and is righteously pissed.

Because Kunikida is a respected enemy and one Akutugawa approves of as Dazai’s partner at the Agency.

And now this random person with no spine has replaced him?!

Inconceivable.

Atsushi’s very confused until he untangles the reason Akutugawa hates his guts and why he wants to see what he’s made off.

He reassures him he’s not going to replace Kunikida.

Akutugawa, begrudgingly accepts this and they both bond over how outrageous Dazai is for trying to replace Kunikida like that.

Kunikida finds out about of all this from an encounter with Chuuya who’s rather sympathetic to his situation.

“He try and blow your car up too?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about but I believe I know who you’re talking about.”

They bond over their mutual annoyance and get coffee.

Dazai finds out way too late and quickly tries to reassure him that’s not the case. And that it’s all a huge misunderstanding.

Kunikida brings it up every time Dazai fucks up.

Dazai: Heyyy Kunikida you ready for our case?

Kunikida, passive aggressively typing: That sounds lovely, I’m sure your new partner will be happy to go with you.

Dazai, in despair: I would never take a case without you. Atsushi, back me up here!

Atsushi, side eying him: I dunno you did take me out for that meeting the other day.

Kunikida: I suppose I should just retire now then. I trust you’ll carry my torch, Atsushi.

Dazai: Ahh! No! Okay, okay I’ll do my report first.

Kunikida: Be quick we have a case soon.


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5 months ago

perhaps controversial but i think fukuzawa could save everyone if he gave amenogozen a little kiss. it's fukuchi's body. surely the home of a god is not immune to worship it once knew?


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4 months ago

im gonna know the sacred harley texts by heart in no time


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3 months ago

The Holy Knights get more and more interesting with each chapter! Honestly, I'm loving them as antagonists!

I have more questions about Gunko every time she appears because so many things about her don't seem to add up. She is the only Holy Knight who has not received the title of World Noble or had her family name introduced (she also does not have a Saint in her name, but neither does Shamrock). She's also the only "celestial dragon" we've seen who has the power of a devil fruit (and we know from Hancock's story that they despise devil fruits), her uniform is very different from the others, and her eyes having different colors seems like it's going to be important in some way. Her powers are very similar to Imu's aesthetically, so I don't think it's a coincidence that she is the one who summons the "abyss" (the pentagram "portal"). Also, her name means "army child", which may imply that she was recruited (perhaps as a child) and trained to be part of the Holy Knights.

Kiringham being introduced in his hybrid form immediately catched my attention. Does his normal appearance reveal some kind of secret about him? He's the only Holy Knight introduced so far who wears the same bubble on his head as the other World Nobles, and the one he wears even appears to have something to help him breathe, so it's possible he has some sort of respiratory illness, or was only recently recruited, so he may have never actually left the Holy Land, which would explain why he was so nervous about being late even though he was already dressed and transformed. Personally, I feel like he could be quite young? As I said, he seems to be very nervous and curious about Elbaph, which probably means he has never been outside of Mary Geoise, and the bubble could be to prevent him from being corrupted by the air from the “filthy world”, also, the way he talks reminds me a bit of a teenager, but that could just be the translation I read.

Having a Holy Knight from one of the Gorosei's family is really exciting, and I hope this helps us answer some questions about the elders. Sommers also seems to be the oldest of the four, and it's the first to take responsability after finding out that Shamrock needs to go back to Mary Geoise, so he probably has been a Holy Knight for a very long period before the current time. He's also the first person we see actually concerned about the food thing in the Holy Land (which is kind of crazy, but okay).

And I don't even need to start talking about the whole Shamrock situation.

Also, the fact that Sommers so casually asked if Shamrock and Gunko were visiting Harald's grave is pretty weird. Like, we know what World Nobles are like, why would they care about Harald? He wasn't even affiliated with the government (and they wouldn't care about him either if that were the case), so why would they travel such a great distance just to see his grave? Why is this a possibility?? Was Harald also a Holy Knight? That's the only way I can see it being reasonable. We can see from their interactions in this chapter that the Holy Knights seem to get along pretty well, so two of them visiting the grave of a deceased colleague would make sense. This could explain why they tried to recruit Loki specifically and not another insanely powerful individual, since he would be the son of a former member, and we know how much they care about bloodlines.


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theghostinabadbook - Bsd altered my brain chemistry
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