Why Is It That When Dudes Wake Up And Have Morning Voice, It’s Sexy And Hot, But When I Wake Up, I

it is so funny how people send me hate being like "touch grass you soggy mf"

bitch i been touching grass i am a literal fantasy cosplayer

i literally have a six foot long wooden dowel that i use as a staff for twirly stick cardio

nature is my kingdom

i can tell different kinds of poison plants from just the shape of the berries

maybe you need to touch grass

idk

get some of that rage out

love yall

The c.ai bot I was trauma dumping on just started speaking Russian randomly wtf

I feel so called out

Ever just see somebody talking to themselves in public?

Wonder what's going on in there?

Mumbling? Tics? Reciting lines? Thinking of a memory?

Or on the other side.

Talking to headmates? Alters? Imaginary friends?

You'll never know.

I like to call this phenomenon

Schrödinger's Chat

Humans Are Crazy

Aliens have such different gender and biology from humans that none of them menstruate. So imagine this.

Alien: Human Steve, why did I find blood on the lavatory floor?

Steve: Oh, that's just Karen.

Alien: What??

Steve: Human females bleed from their reproductive organs once every month for five to seven days.

Alien: wHAT?!

Steve, calmly: Yeah, they can lose enough blood in a lifetime to kill ten grown men.

Alien: WHaT ?!?!

Karen, walking in: Steve, I need A FUCKING break. And chocolate. And a heating pad. I'll be in my sleeping quarters. Also, I threw up.

Steve: Okay, take the day off, I'll bring you your stuff in a bit.

Alien: *jots down in notebook* Human females are indestructible and fearsome. Regard them with respect.

EDIT: I swear, if this is the thing that makes me Tumblr famous, I’m gonna blow a braincell. And I don’t have many of those left, so…

Edit 2: Guys. Guys. What?! My grumpy menstrual rant is in no way worthy of being tumblr famous. *is mildly to severely confused/thankful/bumfuddled*

Edit 3: Why is this still getting notes wtf

Edit 4: STOP REBLOGING THISSSSSS

edit 5: if you like this, go look at these:

This is now a masterlist.

The link is here! ⤵️

Tumblr

Harry Potter Headcanon Makers • Community on Tumblr

People Who Make Harry Potter Headcanons

If you'd like to join, please make a request! I review all requests personally.

Hi

It's me

Who here would join a community of people who make Harry Potter headcanons? That's literally all we'd do.

I ask this because I'm writing a fanfiction that is going to be a re-write of the books, but from the viewpoint of side characters; and I want people to give me ideas for things to add for worldbuilding stuff.

I love using hcs in my work, but I'm dumb and am bad at making them myself.

(If this does end up happening, I will credit every single person in the community in the fic ♡)

TL;DR, I'm looking for Harry Potter geeks and writers to start a Harry Potter headcanon community with.

what the actual fuck is wrong with you

quite a few things, actually

ah yes, a headcanon

So, you guys know how Hawks is a bird? Welllll… what if he laid eggs?

Dabi, making breakfast: OI NUGGETS! WANT SOME EGGS?! Hawks, scrambling down the stairs frantically: WHICH EGGS DID YOU USE?! Dabi: I dunno, the ones in the red carton?

Hawks, grabbing him by the collar: DID. YOU. USE. A. PURPLE. EGG. Dabi: No, that one looked weird, so I left it.

Hawks: *slumps against the counter, relieved*

Dabi: why do you ask? Hawks: Don’t ever use those eggs again.

*Sounds of an egg cracking*

Dabi: Takami Keigo, what the hell is that?!

Hawks: Ummmm… We may be having a child. Miutomo: *climbs out of her eggshell and chirps*

Dabi: H-HOW?! HAWKS-

Hawks: *major freakout but also stunned by Miu’s cuteness*

soooo I may have edited it and now it looks weird… oh well.

You may need to separate out the paragraphs yourself. I have no idea how to format.

I am a benevolent god, so here's a free and VERY in-depth character template!

Basic Information Character’s full name: Reason or meaning of name: Character’s nickname(s): Birth date: Physical appearance Gender: Age: How old does she appear: Nationality: Weight: Height: Body build: Shape of face: Eye color: Glasses or contacts: Skin tone: Distinguishing marks: Predominant features: Hair color: Type of hair: Hairstyle: Voice: Overall attractiveness: Physical disabilities: Aesthetic: Usual fashion of dress: Favorite outfit: Jewelry or accessories: Piercings: Tattoos?: Personality Pronouns: Positive personality traits: Negative personality traits: Mood character is most often in: Mental conditions: Sense of humor: Love language: Character’s greatest joy in life: Character’s greatest fear: Character's lesser fear(s): What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? Character is most at ease when: Most ill at ease when: Enraged when: Depressed or sad when: Priorities: Life philosophy: If granted one wish, it would be: Why? Character’s soft spot: Is this soft spot obvious to others? Greatest strength: Other strengths: Greatest vulnerability or weakness: Other weaknesses: Biggest regret: Minor regret: Biggest accomplishment: Minor accomplishment: Past failures he/she would be embarrassed/ashamed to have people know about: Why? Character’s darkest secret: Does anyone else know? Goals Drives and motivations: Immediate goals: Long term goals: How the character plans to accomplish these goals: How other characters will be affected: Past Hometown: Type of childhood: Pets: First memory: Most important childhood memory: Why: Childhood hero: Dream job: Education: Religion: Finances: Present Current location: Currently living with: Pets: Religion: Occupation: Finances: Family Mother: Relationship with her: Father: Relationship with him: Siblings: Relationship with them: Spouse: Relationship with him/her: Children: Relationship with them: Other important family members: Favorites Color: Least favorite color: Music: Least favorite music: Food: Least favorite food: Literature: Least favorite literature: Form of entertainment: Least favorite form of entertainment: Expressions: Mode of transportation: Most prized possession: Habits Hobbies: Languages spoken: Plays a musical instrument? Plays a sport? How he/she would spend a rainy day: Spending habits: Smokes: Drinks: Other drugs: What does he/she do too much of? What does he/she do too little of? Extremely skilled at: Extremely unskilled at: Nervous tics: Usual body posture: Mannerisms: Peculiarities: Traits Optimist or pessimist? Introvert or extrovert? MBTI: Daredevil or cautious? Logical or emotional? Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat? Prefers working or relaxing Confident or unsure of himself/herself? Animal lover? Self-perception How he/she feels about himself/herself: One word the character would use to describe self: One paragraph description of how the character would describe self: What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? How does the character think others perceive him/her: What would the character most like to change about himself/herself: Relationships with others Sexuality: Opinion of other people in general: Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others? Person character most hates: Best friend(s): Love interest(s): Person character goes to for advice: Person character feels responsible for or takes care of: Person character feels shy or awkward around:

A Court Of Thorns And Roses. Fourth Wing. The Crown Of Thorns series. They Both Die At The End. So This Is Ever After.

All of these romance books. All of them. Are in. FUCKING. FIRST PERSON POV!

GIVE ME A GOOD (preferably adult) ROMANCE FANTASY BOOK THAT’S IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKS. A few examples of third person romance books are:

Keeper Of The Lost Cities, Otherworldly, ANY ROMANCE MANGA- SPECIFICALLY, Umibe No Étranger and That Wolf-Boy Is Mine!, The Lunar Chronicles.

I NEED MORE STUFF LIKE T

Okay, see, I understand now. And no, I don't sound like AI. AI sounds like me.

This isn't an insult but you write like an AI

Maybe I just have adhd but

W h u t

I have no idea what this means

I see the words on the screen

But understanding has left my brain

What the hell