My Poems Collection So Far (2019-2024)

james and oliver - the hero and his sidekick

Spent my new year eve with dead writers.

I cried that night, my brain could not stop remembering you as if you were the only thing that it can process clearly. Your tiny voice, your enthusiastic gestures, everything that I miss in a person. It is true that people tend to miss something when it's not around anymore. My mistakes of neglecting you frequently came from the thought that we would never be separated, whatever happened. But after your disappearance a month ago, life has never been the same.

I cried that night, my tears fell down like I had never cried before. My heart begging for your presence, for your laughter, for your humour. Hence, it was the empty air that greeted me back. The cold air of the space between us, shudder me. My head keep saying, "is it over for us?". I guess it is time to call it a day, to save energy for chasing back your shadow tomorrow.

I cried that night, so I let my intrusive thoughts win. I texted you. Begging. Asking. That cold tone of yours greeted me back.

"It is over for us," my heart said in agony.

𝔯𝔞𝔦𝔫𝔶 𝔠𝔦𝔱𝔶 𝔪𝔬𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤 🌧️🏙️☕️🚕

This book is older than me.

Second book of Pramoedya Ananta Toer's Buru Quartet: Anak Semua Bangsa (Children of All Nations), published in 1980.

Therefore, do not hesitate to make a mistake and continue searching until you find the right person.

k.b. // human design analysis

Caffeine helps going through everyday shits Indonesian government throws at its people.

Books in 2024

Saturday's study log and reflections.

Jakarta on that Saturday was quite solemn, despite the news that has broken so many people's hearts. People—from high school students to middle- and lower-class workers, individuals to organizations and political parties—took to the streets (specifically in front of the House of Representatives at Senayan and the KPU - General Elections Commission - at Menteng) to protest recent political events that felt like violations of Indonesia's fundamental laws. The protests began on August 22, 2024, and continued on August 23 and August 24, although the last two days weren't as massive as the first.

As someone who studies Human Rights and a small portion of international law, what these masses of people did in Jakarta and other cities in Indonesia is solid evidence of how people in this country still love democracy and want it to remain the government's solemn system. The protests they voiced (and will keep voicing until their goals are accomplished) help to restore the checks and balances that the government of Indonesia seems to have forgotten, as they have become drunk with power.

Many protesters were hurt, and some even lost their eyes. It's heartbreaking that the cost of democracy is the blood of its own people who need it the most.

This massive event reflects what I've been studying these past two months in my EDX course: Human Rights, Human Wrong. I've learned how a government can be both the protector and the abuser of its own people. What happened in Indonesia is a clear example. This realization has deepened my understanding of the delicate balance required to maintain a just society and the courage needed to stand up against injustice.

I may not take part in the protest directly, but let me do my part by sharing the stories of people who came back home safely and how they cried about their friends' brutal abductions by police. Let me share the screams for justice of people who are moving en masse to regain the utmost power of democracy. Their courage and determination inspire me to use my voice to amplify their cause, ensuring that their struggles are not forgotten.

Let the government realize how easily they can gain power, and how easily it can slip away from their hands. Democracy is not just a system but a living, breathing entity that requires constant vigilance and care from both the governed and those who govern.

Reading with Cats

@ Habitat Park, South Jakarta