Arthur, Addressing The Round Table: Fives? A Ten Is Speaking.

Arthur: We need to create a distraction.

Percival: You want me to try? If I flex real hard I can make my shirt explode off of my body.

Arthur: Wait, you can seriously do that?

Gwaine: Oh, yeah! I've seen him do it. One of the buttons flew off and hit Elyan.

Merlin: I got thrown in the stocks today. Again.

Gaius, sighing: What did you do this time?

Merlin: In the throne room, Uther pointed his sword at me and said "There's an idiot at the end of this sword".

Merlin: So I asked which end.

Gaius:

Gwen: How dumb does Gaius think we are?

Merlin: Sometimes he leaves me pictures of food instead of a shopping list.

bonus:

mergwaine at a restaurant

merlin: can you please get us a table?

gwaine: sure thing love

[three minutes later]

gwaine, sprinting towards merlin, carrying a table: START THE CAR!!!

Arthur: everything that comes out of your mouth is stupid!

Merlin: Arthur

Arthur, entering the tavern with Merlin and Gwaine: Can you guys get a table?

Merlin: Okay.

Merlin and Gwaine, three minutes later, carrying a table and sprinting at Arthur: GO GO GO

Uther: The boys haven't eaten their sandwiches.

Gaius: Okay, just throw them out.

Uther:

[Later]

Uther, helping Arthur and Merlin pack suitcases: Look, I'm just as surprised as you are.