Cw: Animal Cruelty

No thoughts, head empty, only Kakashi tiredly fighting 2 Akatsuki lumberjacks with (1) kunai and like half of a normal person’s chakra while looking out for his dead friend’s students 

Sure, other platforms may call them “followers” too, but only Tumblr can capture the feel of a faceless crowd of huddled masses trailing after you about a city block’s distance away, picking up pages of your diary or scrawlings that you drop on the ground as you walk along. Some of these people have been there for years. Some only joined the crowd last week. Collectively, the crowd is ancient and ageless. Who are they? What do they want from you? Nobody knows. Walk a little faster.

Hatake Kakashi being a sassy little piece of shit

I don’t really have time to run an fic-writing event (I have no experience with that), but today I was overcome with Inspiration to design a Harry Potter Worldbuilding Bingo Fic Challenge. So, here are the rough potential categories, subcategories, and specific prompts I came up with today for that (under the cut, based largely on my own interests, I will admit). 

Category Example: Crafting and Workmanship 

Subcategory Example: Fashion in the Wizarding World 

Specific Prompt Examples: A Week of Albus Dumbledore’s Wardrobe Choices OR an Overview of the Best-Dressed Professors and Students of Hogwarts OR Designing New Yule Ball Outfits for Characters 

Excerpts of my fav potential specific prompts (from below the cut): 

Luna Lovegood and Colin Creevey start a Hogwarts newspaper in their first year (and nobody knows what to do about this)

It’s Card Game Night in Gryffindor Tower (People May Die)

the Seventh-Years of 1992-1993 face their NEWTs with Gilderoy Lockart as their Defense teacher (someone help them)

Hermione tries to discuss university options with Harry and reacts with horror when Harry reveals he had no idea that there were magical universities

A Hogwarts teacher writes journals/papers for a publication and gets into an academic feud with a Beauxbatons teacher

The poor Ministry worker who has to deal with the sobbing preschooler whose parents jokingly told them they’d go to prison for performing Underage Magic even accidentally

Slughorn quizzes his students in a fun and relaxed lesson in a game called “Is this an alcoholic cocktail or a potion?”

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hes like 26 years old 20 pounds wet, less than a foot tall, and He Is Holding This Fuckign Family Together.

Slytherin won but Sirius would never let it pass the opportunity to embarrass and be proud of his little brother

AND SINCE JK ROWLING TURNED OUT A BITCH SHE CAN EAT MY ASS!!! I’m ignoring any canon content & that involves Sirius and Regulus were close good bros

do yourself a favor and read “Oh God, Not Again!” by Sarah1281

it is a harry potter fanfic from like 2009, 160k words, 50 chapters

basically, adult Harry accidentally goes back in time and wakes up on his 11th birthday again, but with all his memories of the future intact

(the way he travels back makes no sense whatsoever but it doesn’t really matter)

harry decides upon 3 goals:

fuck up as much shit as possible

make a shitload of money

save some lives or whatever

it is

H I L A R I O U S

his go-to explanation for how he knows what’s going to happen?

he has a psychic scar

(hermione is SO PISSED about this)

(neville’s like “either he’s psychic, or he’s the greatest conman alive”)

everyone just sort of assumes harry’s insane and he doesn’t do much to dispute this

harry also decides to make it his mission in life to LOSE the house cup every year

“snape is my sole ally”

he also goes out of his way to befriend neville, ginny, and luna earlier this time, so they’re part of the gang throughout and it’s great

even draco is a friend!

(kind of)

(when harry’s not spreading a rumor that draco’s the lovechild of narcissa and snape, anyway)

harry’s motivation for everything he does in this story is basically, “oh, this will be hilarious”

either that or, “it’s probably a tax deductible”

because the way lockhart is written in this story is also amazing and harry ends up teaming up with him to merchandise The Boy Who Lived so he can have cash to burn

(so he gets a LOT of shit done via bribes)

it gets to the point where harry is able to convince everyone that he’s not the heir of slytherin…. because if he was, he’d have found a way to make money off of it

and everyone’s like “yeah ok that checks out”

in this timeline, neville’s boggart isn’t snape…. it’s harry as the minister of magic

harry also decides to make sure cedric lives by quizzing him constantly on what to do if he ends up in a graveyard

harry: by the way, that reminds me – cedric. graveyard.

cedric, not even really listening: run like hell.

the sheer magnitude to which harry does not give a fuck in this timeline is truly awe-inspiring

he mouths off to everyone, and i mean everyone. lockhart, snape, the dursleys, malfoy, friggin’ voldemort

everyone is like “what… what the fuck, harry”

(though by the end of first year it’s more like “… *deep sigh* … fine.

snape is so angry

it’s fucking hysterical and just about everyone ends up better off

here’s the link

thank me later

i vibe with ikea regulus so much (love that idea so much) but as a barista lemme just say regulus gives me major barista vibes. like he enjoys making drinks but also he wants to beat tf out certain customers. he also definitely complains about the music playing in cafe 24/7 and will hop on aux as soon as his boss leaves. he definitely drinks iced drinks all year round. and while some would say he drinks black iced coffee i would disagree. he definitely drinks iced lavender lattes with oat milk or cold brew with oat milk and vanilla.

regulus starts spelling peoples names wrong on purpose and starts to hate mainstream music with a passion

Sirius: I'm your older brother! You should respect me. Stop being a bully!!

Regulus: