You’re Allowed To Do Things Simply Because You Want To. You Don’t Owe Anyone An Explanation For Your

Do you have any reading recs about perfumes?

I haven’t read most of these yet— but here’s my current perfume reading list. Enjoy! I might update this with more as I move along. 

ARTICLES

‘Smell, Memory’ by Rachel Syme

‘The Ugly History of Beautiful Things: Perfume’ by Katy Kelleher 

‘In 1902, Audiences Turned Up Their Noses at the First Perfume Concert’ by Allison Meier

‘Kazimir Malevich’s Little-Known Perfume Bottle’ by Jillian Steinhauer

‘Getting a Whiff of Perfume’s Illusions’ by Sonya Vatomsky

‘LAYERS: Pushing Through the Arts to Perfume’ by Dannielle Sergent

‘Scenting Shakespeare’s Tragic Heroines: Cleopatra and Lady Macbeth’ by Lauryn Beer

‘Some Thoughts on Scent Criticism’ by Miguel Matos

‘Scent and Healing: The Transformative Power of Perfume’ by Ida Meister

‘Here’s Why Perfume Description Are Never About Smell’ by Elyse Hauser

‘Heaven Scent’ by Danielle del Sol

‘Ann Haviland, Forgotten Mastermind of the Signature Scent’ by Jessica Murphy 

‘Perfume, Power, and God’ by Arabelle Sicardi

 ‘How to Pick a Perfume When You Can’t Smell’ by Alaina Leary

‘People Are Buying This Perfume Because They Think It’s From Killing Eve’ by Rebecca Jennings

‘Meet Chandler Burr, the World’s Foremost Fragrance Expert’ by Chavie Lieber

‘Making Perfume From the Rain’ by Cynthia Barnett

‘Can Perfume Sabotage a Budding Romance?’ by Jesse Frost

‘The Scent of True Love’ by Cari Romm

‘Perfume: An Ethereal Corset Trapping Everyone in the Same Unnatural Shape’ by Kasia Cieplak-Mayr von Baldegg

The New York Times archives on Perfume

FICTION

The Song of Solomon from The Bible

Das Parfaum by Patrick Süskind

NONFICTION

Essence and Alchemy: A Natural History of Perfume by Mandy Aftel

Fragrant: The Secret Life of Scent by Mandy Aftel

Throughsmoke by Jehanne Dubrow

The Emperor of Scent: A True Story of Perfume and Obsession by Chandler Burr

The Perfect Scent: A Year Inside the Perfume Industry in Paris and New York by Chandler Burr

Dior: The Perfumes by Chandler Burr

Folio Columns 2003-2014 by Luca Turin

Perfumes: The Guide by Luca Turin

The Secret of Scent: Adventures in Perfume and the Science of Smell by Luca Turin

The Perfume Lover: A Personal History of Scent by Denyse Beaulieu

The Diary of a Nose: A Year in the Life of a Parfumeur by Jean-Claude Ellena

A Scented Palace: The Secret History of Marie Antoinette’s Perfumer by Elisabeth de Feydeau

Coming to My Senses: A Story of Perfume, Pleasure, and an Unlikely Bride by Alyssa Harad

Perfume: The Alchemy of Scent by Jean-Claude Ellena

Floating Gold: A Natural (and Unnatural) History of Ambergris by Christopher Kemp

The Foul and the Fragrant: Odor and the French Social Imagination by Alain Corbin

A Natural History of the Senses by Diane Ackerman

Fragrance: The Story of Perfume from Cleopatra to Chanel by Edwin T. Morris

Cult Perfumes: The World’s Most Exclusive Perfumeries by Tessa Williams  

The Ephemeral History of Perfume: Scent and Sense in Early Modern England by Holly Dugan

Perfume: Joy, Scandal, Sin: A Cultural History of Fragrance from 1750 to the Present by Richard Stamelman 

The Aroma of Righteousness: Scent and Seduction in Rabbinic Life and Literature by Deborah Green

Scenting Salvation: Ancient Christianity and the Olfactory Imagination by Susan Ashbrook Harvey

Scent: The Mysterious and Essential Powers of Smell by Annick Le Guérer 

Encyclopedia of the Exquisite: An Anecdotal History of Elegant Delights by Jessica Kerwin Jenkins

Aroma by by Constance Classen

Flowers and Fruit by Colette

hey! so i was wondering: what are some things that you’ll always buy high end/spend more money on vs things that you’ll save on/buy cheap.

love your blog!

Spend on:

Bras: I cannot say it more emphatically; the quality of your bra will determine the quality of your entire look. If you want to look your best you have got to invest in a great quality bra that fits you perfectly. This is non-negotiable.

Nail polish: Because you don't want to spend 30 minutes applying a $1 nail polish that's going to chip after a few hours. It's best to invest in the nail polish brands that are a bit pricier but last longer because it's ultimately going to be a great investment of your time.

Bed sheets: High thread count sheets are ultimately indispensable- they last longer, wash better & they ultimately feel better. Sleep quality is one of the most important things you can invest in and I promise you great quality sheets will contribute to a better night's sleep.

Cookware: Specifically a great set of knives and pots/pans will take you a longggg way. Since I've begun taking my cooking seriously I've invested in better cookware and I swear on everything my food tastes and looks MUCH better.

Stilettos: I can't quantify the number of times I've had to leave an event early because my feet were literally screaming on account of me wearing cheap stilettos. Trust me, it's not worth it. Spend some time researching great quality shoes that are well reviewed and save yourself money and hours of excruciating pain.

Jeans: When jeans are of great quality, it shows. They hug you better, they conceal imperfections, and they can last decades. I have less than 10 pairs of jeans in total and I don't think I'll ever need any more because the ones I have are high quality and will last forever.

Hair extensions: I've had to learn the hard way that high quality human hair costs money. Yes, you can find a synthetic or virgin wig online for under $200 but within a couple of weeks, it's going to start shedding like crazy and falling apart when you put heat on it. I strongly encourage investing in one or two really high quality wigs/weaves/clip-ins, etc. that are made from raw human hair because they will last you years and save you a ton of money in the long run. The wig I'm currently wearing cost me well over $1000 but I never have to take it off, I've colored it several times with no issue, and it's going to last me years.

Save on:

Makeup products: Makeup isn't that complicated and there's no reason why you should be spending $60+ on a foundation that is made from the same ingredients as most other foundations. I'm not saying that all expensive makeup brands aren't worth their price, but I am saying that you can find perfectly great makeup products at your local convenience store. I recently returned one of my favorite Charlotte Tilbury lipsticks because I took a trip to Primark and found that their $2 lipsticks are WAY creamier, longer lasting, and complimentary on dark skin.

Workout clothes: No, you don't need to spend $80 on a pair of lululemon leggings to have a great workout, especially when there are a ton of brands that are much cheaper and provide higher quality options. And honestly, I'm a big fan of the "random-t-shirt-and-leggings-I-found-at-a-thrift-shop" workout look because I'm not trying to impress anyone at the gym and I'd rather spend my money elsewhere.

Skincare products: Similar to makeup products, the ingredients that actually matter (retionoids, vitamin c, exfoliants, & SPF) are not that expensive so you don't actually need to spend an astronomical amount to get high quality skincare. When looking for skincare products, focus less on price and more on finding ingredients that work for your skin.

Books: In today's day and age it's really not necessary to be paying $20+ on a book that you can likely access online or second-hand. So before running to Barns and Noble to find your next book, head to a local thrift shop or parous through online stores.

Designer items: Because frankly, no one's gonna know nor care whether or not you're carrying the real Chanel classic flap or the fake one you got on DhGate for $75. Unless you can very comfortably drop thousands on a single piece of clothing or accessory, you should just go ahead and have your cake and eat it too by buying the high quality replica version.

Lovingly,

Elle

It’s important to reiterate how crucial it is to keep your goals to yourself. Even to family members and friends, just keep it to yourself lol. A goal of yours that may sound crazy and bizarre to them may be aspirational to you, and hearing these unsolicited opinions from others really isn’t beneficial to your journey.

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YOU DO NOT HEAL BY UNDERSTANDING YOUR TRAUMA

You heal by feeling safe enough to stop repeating it

Not reverting to your old coping mechanisms anymore is how you break the cycle

You want to understand because understanding gives the illusion of control

When we go through pain our mind kicks into overdrive trying to make sense of it. It’s the mind’s way of saying If I can figure this out, I can prevent it from happening again

Sometimes there isn’t a logical answer that will make the pain go away because it had nothing to do with you. And trying to intellectualize everything can become a way to avoid feeling the things that actually needs to move through the body

We try understanding because it’s less scary than sitting in the unknown. Stop trying to solve everything like a puzzle and instead start soothing the part of us that feels afraid, abandoned, unworthy etc

You don’t need another explanation

You need a hug

A deep breath

A new boundary

Or someone who looks at you and tells you that it wasn’t your fault

Because it wasn’t 🤍