◈ yeeyee
when kian gets past the point of drunk, teetering ever so lightly on hammered, he gets a little clingy, a little giggly, and a lot honest. it’s really a recipe for disaster. somewhere in his foggy mind, he knows this and his subconscious is screaming at him to just go home. but he doesn’t listen. “can i stay with you tonight?” he practically whines, arms wrapped around moonsu’s neck as he hangs off of him. he knows he’ll say yes, but he pouts anyway. it’s dangerous to be in this position when you’re not an entirely honest person, but it’s freeing. which is something that kian very rarely feels these days. “we can do whatever you want.” he sings, pressing his nose against the boy’s cheek. he kisses the soft skin there then presses another to the corner of his mouth.
dropping one hand from around his neck, he lets it trail over his chest then circles around and hops on moonsu’s back without permission. “you’re so nice, susu.” he compliments, nuzzling his nose behind the other’s ear. “i wish you weren’t, i wish you were mean. then maybe i wouldn’t feel so bad every time we’re together.” he confesses, closing his eyes as he leans all of his body weight on him. “everything would be a lot easier if you just hated me.” he mumbles. “i’m not supposed to feel bad, i never do. but you’re just so … nice.” he repeats again. “stop being nice, seriously.” he chastises. “so when i hurt you, i won’t feel guilty.”
annya was barley following the movie if she were to be honest, but it was something mind numbing for them to watch as they tried to wait out this terrible snowstorm. at least he was with her, the two cuddling close and simply enjoying each other’s company. to her, that was enough. she nods as he leaves to make some more popcorn, her eyes following him for a moment before glancing back at the t.v. sure, she’s had a few relationships in the past during high school, and while they were great, she knew they wouldn’t last forever. the connection she made with them wasn’t as strong as she believed it should be. however, when it came to kian, something felt…different. she was falling for him, quite hard, and suddenly their relationship was starting to reach places she’s never explored before. was she terrified? absolutely, yet kind of excited as well. she’s now starting the rest of her life, and she didn’t mind if she got lucky in finding someone sooner than she thought.
she hums softly into his kiss before shrugging her shoulders, “you’re right, i haven’t really been paying attention.” she admits with a small blush that only worsens with his cute little line, causing her to bury her face into his shoulder for a moment with a quick laugh. looking back up at him, she steals another kiss, or three, before turning off the t.v completely. “hm…well there’s always a few video games we can play. you can’t go wrong with mairo kart, right? or there’s some board games i have some where…” she turns her head to look around for a moment, trying to remember where she put them before facing him once more. “or i can always make you another costume,” she teases with a light laugh before moving to straddle his lap, her arms hanging loosely around his neck as she kisses his forehead, than cheek, than lips once more. “what sounds good to you?”
he slips back into place beside her easily, fitting his arm behind her again, and it’s like all those movies where they claim to be puzzle pieces. it really is like they were made for each other. but kian knows that isn’t true. he was never meant to be happy, never meant to be with someone. he doesn’t deserve it. but she makes him feel like he does. “board games?” he repeats with a quirk of his brow. “are you sixty or five? i can’t tell.” he teases. but all rational thought flies out of his mind when she moves to straddle him and his hands immediately settle on her waist. she just fits so perfectly against him that it should be illegal. he shouldn’t be allowed to have her. especially not like this. but he still takes and takes because he’s selfish. he’ll keep her for however long it takes for her to realize that he’s a monster. “hm.” he hums, eyes closing as she peppers sweet kisses on his face and lips.
“what were we talking about again?” he smiles, pressing his lips to hers a little harder. he doesn’t dare deepen it before he’s pulling away again. and it’s not that he doesn’t want to, but he’s not trying to push her. for once in his life, he’s actually thinking about someone else before himself. surely he deserves some kind of award. “we could just do this? i’m good with that.” he suggests, unable to stop smiling. and not one of the fake ones either, this one is genuine. “or we could go sledding, i guess? i’m not really sure what people do during snowstorms.” he admits. “this is my first one. don’t get much snow in california. or, you know, any other kind of weather besides constant sunshine.” he explains. “tragic, i know. truly a first world problem.” he says, letting his hands fall slightly to rest just below her hips as his thumbs rub her thighs gently.
ANNYA: b/c i need to know you're at least in a safe place if you're drinking like this
ANNYA: no i don't, hate is a toxic feeling i refuse to have
ANNYA: kian, there's no point in talking about this in the state you're in, now where are you?
KIAN: idt doesnt mdatter nothing mteatrs
KIAN: i know kcause uyr ptreecf & i suck & i cvnat believe i ever hsad you then lolst you di'm so stupid
KIAN: if ei tlle you are yyou gonna come here??
KIAN: ti'm sorry i messed up so bad annya ui'm sporry you met me i'mm sorry i cvouldn't bqe waho you wanted ume kto be vi wish di could say enough sorrys fto make everything bettter
“okay,” he says as a certainty. confidence in any aspect has never been, and will probably never be, a strong suit of his, but he’ll try to believe kian’s words. not for himself - he rarely does anything for his own sake, but because he genuinely does trust him entirely. a small grin appears on his lips as kian says he does too, already feeling a growing excitement in the pit of his stomach just from the thought. jun’s almost completely still as kian’s lips press to the corner of his mouth. though it’s not the first time, each time it happens jun reverts back to a shyness that he doesn’t typically feel around kian anymore. but, without fail, as soon as they cross any line of friendship, he begins to feel an even deeper desperation towards the other. every time they’re this close, he knows it’s exactly what he wants. it’s the delicate way kian goes into it, and how he can make jun physically feel how much he cares. jun accepts the invitation and leans into kian, pressing his lips against his with an eagerness he tried, and obviously failed, to suppress. “you have?” he whispers in response, finding it too hard to believe. “i think about it all the time,” he mumbles sheepishly, caught up in the moment just enough to be completely blunt with his feelings. his hand’s on kian’s neck now, his thumb lightly brushing his cheek affectionately. it feels like a big moment, but he doesn’t know how wrong he is about that. “i’m not,” he says too quickly, his words wrapped with a sense of pleading, like he needs kian to know how untrue that is. as soon as he says it’s annoying, jun’s smiling too. “no one could be too good for you,” he adds with a pout, “and that’s really everything i need to know.”
as soon as seojun’s resolve gives and he presses back into him, chasing the kiss that kian cuts off a little too quickly, he knows that he has the green light; his roommate is definitely still right where he wants him. “mhm.” he hums in response, eyes glinting with something mischievous. he isn’t surprised when the other boy admits that he thinks about the prospect of them being together all the time, but he still pretends to be. he breaks out into a grin, head dropping as he feigns embarrassment. “imagine how mortifying it would’ve been if i said that, but you didn’t reciprocate.” he states, knowing that the scenario was never even a possibility. “you’re wrong.” he says, bluntly. “you truly put me on such a high pedestal, junnie. i don’t deserve it.” he adds, a slither of honesty seeping through the cracks of his mask. he drags his index finger down the boy’s jawline and sighs. “is it weird i kinda just wanna stay here?” he questions, letting out a light laugh. “i don’t wanna ruin the moment.” he admits, jutting his lips out into a pout. “we should at least do something before we go.” he suggests. “like... tear up the bible or push over a few bookshelves or dig through the librarian’s desk or, you know, whatever.”
the way moonsu did anything was always so painfully meticulous. he could never do anything halfway, and relationships were the biggest show of evidence that he had no concept of toning down his dramatic displays of affection. it was valentine’s day, anyway - or a few days after, and he found that as a perfect excuse to go all out for kian. the two had been too busy to celebrate the day of, but the delayed celebrations were all the more of a reason to show kian just how special he was to him. the only demands he had made were that kian be at the park at six - early enough that the sun would be setting soon. the surrounding candles carefully placed around the picnic blanket had been the truly painful part of it all. he knew he looked like a fool, rushing around to relight the candles every time the wind blew the slightest bit. it was exhausting, but kian was worth the embarrassment of a pair of old women laughing at him from a park bench for thirty minutes straight.
when kian finally showed up, it felt like moonsu was on stage, ready for the performance of his life - that performance being making sure that his boyfriend had a valentine’s day date he’d never forget. “hey,” he rushed out, moving forward to kiss his cheek before holding out the single chocolate rose. “this is it,” he said after a moment, nodding his head. “i just asked you to come here so i could give you that. wanna go now? i can think of some way more exciting things we could be doing right now. not that we probably couldn’t do it here, too, but the amount of old people hanging around is kind of a turn off.” with a scrunch of his nose, he waited a few seconds before grabbing kian’s wrist and tugging him towards the actual display. a few of the candles were out again, causing an inner huff of frustration for moon that he did his best not to show - now wasn’t the time to pout over the little imperfections. he’d just pout about them later in private. the blanket was outlined with roses and kiss candies; moon took a moment to admire his own display before gasping as he tugged his phone out, a tiny speaker to the side blasting jazz music. he quickly turned the volume down and led kian to sit. “as for what we’re eating… not the most romantic meal, but…” he grabbed a box of pizza, opening it to show pizza in the shape of a heart. “… pretty good, right?” // @kians
kian hates valentine’s day. really, he hates every holiday but he hates this one the most. he can’t even count how many times he’s had to sit through dumb traditions just because his partner at the time wanted to show how much they loved him. there were even a few times where he got so frustrated with the whole thing that he just broke off the relationship then and there. it always adds a little more sting to break someone’s heart on the day of love. and, honestly, he considered doing that very same thing today. to moonsu. but, at the last minute, he decided against it. he hasn’t had all his fun yet, hasn’t even scratched the surface so, therefore, he knows he has to suffer through another day of pretending like he actually gives a shit about all of this. and he knows he’s acting like a crybaby but, fuck, he really doesn’t want to go. that’s why he takes his time getting there and if moonsu mentions it then he’ll just make something up. and his boyfriend will believe him because kian has never given him a reason not to.
he sees moonsu before the boy ever sees him and he can’t help but roll his eyes. he knows him well and knows he’s probably went way over the top. and while, normally, he would enjoy the attention, he had a long night and he’s so tired that he can barely muster up the ability to smile. still, he does. he beams brightly at moonsu when he bounds over and gives him a tender kiss on the cheek. he slips so easily into the pretend kian that sometimes he wonders if there’s not a bit of the real one in there somewhere. “hey to you, too.” he replies, taking the chocolate rose from his hands. he smells it because, c’mon it’s a chocolate rose, and grins wider. “can’t say i’ve ever gotten a chocolate rose before. seems like there’s a lot of firsts always happening between us.” he quirks a brow. but moonsu is the exact opposite of him. where kian is calm and collected, the other is already freaking out and rambling. he’s nervous and if kian were anyone but himself, he would think it was endearing.
“wow, i can’t believe this—” he trails off, eyes studying the scene in amazement, “is this all for me?” he asks, though it obviously is. “you always outdo yourself, moonsu. i’m so lucky to have you.” he smiles, taking a seat on the blanket then leaning over to press a gentle kiss to his lips. when his boyfriend shows him the pizza, he lets out a laugh full of admiration (because that’s what he’s suppose to do), and gives him another kiss. “maybe it’s not the most romantic meal, but you can never go wrong with pizza.” he states. “i love it.” he makes sure to add before chewing on his lip in thought. “and ... i love you.” he confesses. “i— i know we’ve only been dating for a couple of months but ... it’s been amazing. it’s been so different from anyone else i’ve been with. i’ve never felt this way about someone.” he admits, swallowing hard. “i’m sorry if it’s too soon. i don’t wanna scare you away, but i wanted you to know.” he says, reaching over to take one of his hands in his own. “i’m in this for the long haul. i hope you are, too.”
“another one! hell yeah this game is my fucking BITCH!” casper exclaimed, throwing his long arms in the arm in celebration. casper was a very athletic person in general, so tossing a ball at stacked milk jugs was child’s play. he quickly apologized to the carny in charge of restacking bottles, feeling somewhat guilty for clearing house of prizes. sure, it was 3 plushies thus far but casper was a competitive soul. once he found something he was good at, he was wiling to milk it for all it had. no pun intended.“anyone want a plushie? it’s on me. i already have two.” he called out to anyone who he’d startled with his ridiculously loud celebration.
kian wants to rip his hair out strand by strand, not being built to withstand the kind of activity that comes with events like this. sure, his facade slips easily into place these days, but it’s so exhausting to keep up with for long periods of time and with so many different people. still, he humors those around him and forces a smile onto his face. “you’d have a great future in the olympics if only they had the milk bottle game.” he teases with a small smile, popping a piece of cotton candy into his mouth. it’s all a little too sugary for his taste, but he loves the way it melts on his tongue. “oh, wow? a plushie? for free? so generous.” he continues in a joking manner, craning his neck to check out the row of prizes. he’ll probably toss it the moment he gets the chance, but he’ll take it anyway. hell, he could even re-gift it to moonsu or something. “i want that one.” he points, his finger angled at the bunny. “you good at any other games, carnival boy? maybe we could make it into a little challenge.”
MOONSU: are you telling me all it takes is some flowers to compete with me?? don’t be rude! 😡😡 MOONSU: i provide so much more than that. you think i won’t just get an entire high school band to come up and perform celine dion’s entire discography for you?? don’t tempt me!! MOONSU: you look very cute today though 🤭💟💖
KIAN: of course not but its a start 😋 KIAN: oh yeah? might have to see it to believe it..... KIAN: awww thx ☺☺ you too, babe 😘 KIAN: so...... what’re you doin? KIAN: been missin you.....
MINJI: and what about it ?? MINJI: pls don’t say shit like that it would be like fucking my own bro and i don’t swing that way MINJI: he’s my best friend, not that it matters to you
KIAN: don’t be mean especially when i’m nothin but nice to u KIAN: oh ya? how come u don’t come hang at our dorm with us then? KIAN: seems like the makings of a threesome to me KIAN: ofc it matters to me! any friend of junnies is a friend of mine 😇
☆ — who : @seojvns ☆ — when : february of 2019 ☆ — where : the campus library
“just trust me.” kian whispers, placing the flashlight between his teeth. he shifts his weight from one leg to the other in his crouched position and continues moving the bobby pin around in the lock. it’s not the best tool but, when he hears the faint click, he relishes in the fact that it gets the job done. standing to his full height, he plucks the flashlight from his lips and smiles. “after you.” he says, ushering his roommate inside. it seems kind of dumb, and probably confusing, to be breaking into a place that’s open all the time, but he has his reasons. “i figured, before we set out on our little mini road trip, that we could come here first. and, before you say anything—” he cuts in, making the trek through each of the aisles separating the different shelves, “i know i can technically come here whenever i want.” he says, finally stopping to grab a book.
“but it’s always so busy, it’s frustrating. plus, it’s kinda cool being somewhere you’re not supposed to be, yeah?” he quirks a brow, a small smile on his face that he isn’t sure seojun can even make out in the dark. tucking the book under his arm, kian steps around the corner and begins pushing two of the tables together. once he’s satisfied, he climbs on top of them and lays down on his back. “come.” he instructs, patting the space next to him. “let’s find some shit to do, places to go.” he says as he opens the travel book in his hands. “need you to hold the flashlight for me.” he says, turning his own off.