Hey, I Don't Know If You Remember Me (I'm The One With Suicidality), But I Just Wanted To Let You Know

Me being born autistic: Well this could have been a lot harder

Everyone else preparing to traumatize the fuck out of me: Would you like to see how much harder?

January was a tough year but we made it

I literally just saw a post of someone talking about how having specific symptoms made them more a singlet and not a full system, just because alters were silent for a while. That they didn't feel like they're a system because they were the only one fronting.

And like. Wow, who told you this? Who made you think that if alters aren't heard in the headspace, that you're not a system anymore?

You're still a system, you're a system regardless of your alters showing up and switching out.

Alters don't die, but they can go dormant. But dormancy is not alter death, they're just asleep. Splitting and fusing is not death either.

Alters are different states of consciousness. If they don't front it doesn't mean they're gone.

You are a system, you don't stop being a system. Even if you reach final fusion, it's possible that you'll split again. You are not a singlet or a partial singlet. Sometimes, alters just don't front because they don't need to.

“I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of a Library.” -Jorge Luis Borges ♡

over coffee with my mom this morning: “sometimes we hesitate to invite people into our life because we feel like our space isn’t good enough yet. things are a little messy, or our place settings don’t match, or our situation isn’t quite what we want it to be. don’t let that stop you. invite people in anyway.”

Hi! I know you don't know me but my bf suffers from did and has only recently realized this and started treatment. Older alters of his say that there used to be an inner world and one even told me that they think a 'system collapse' has happened, so I guess my question is what all information can you offer me to understand and help him get his inner world back and restore any communication at all with his alters. Thanks in advance! And sorry if I'm being rude!

hi, i am in no way an expert in innerworlds so this may be a bit tough for me to answer. i can give you what i have though.

i’m also not sure about what a system collapse is, but i know innerworlds can sometimes be less accessible to certain alters or can be harder to get to when something causes an increase in dissociative barriers. i’d try to figure out if there’s something that might have triggered this lack of communication to happen and try to figure out how to deal with it or cope with what’s going on. if ur bf has a therapist, it would be good to talk to them about it, even if it’s not about the did/innerworld disappearance, but about what most likely was the cause. if it has to do with undiscovered trauma tho, he should not go digging into that.

he could try reaching out in his mind to specific alters, see if they’ll respond. he could also try to build an innerworld manually; not all innerworlds automatically exist, some are made. i have a few pictures on my phone from a post i saw maybe a year ago with some innerworld building tips. here they are:

also, i recently made a post on system communication and journaling for summer system education week. it’s got a lot of tips and resources to go with them. here’s the post

hope this helps, i wish u and ur bf good luck with this

All of this.

We knew we had ADHDbrain *long* before diagnosis.

We knew we had BPD *long* before even all the symptoms were showing.

We knew we even were Multiple v. early on (but were gaslit by psychiatry).

You know you better than anyone else.

Gatekeeping culture is like: “don’t get your information online it’s too easy😡!!!” Then offer “find research papers online it’s really easy🙄”

Then block you.

Self diagnosing isn’t TikTok videos and random blogs. It’s literally months to years of research. There’s a lot of reasons why someone can’t get professionally diagnosed.

Misdiagnoses happen a lot

People aren’t taken seriously

It’s expensive asf

Its inaccessible

People want to adopt

People want the right to their bodily autonomy

I’m disappointed when I go online and see my bullies are now nurses. That’s kinda the same thing when I go on here and see professionally diagnosed people who shit on undiagnosed for posting coping mechanisms.

Stop calling people “the problem” for coping. The real issue is people who post any “if you have these… you might have” THATS DANGEROUS. what isn’t dangerous is:

Finding coping mechanisms

Find organization tools to function

Therapy

Talking about experiences

Researching extensively on traits

Documenting

Unmasking

Printing off quizzes or research articles from well established resources (Embracing Autism, ASAN, AIM, awn network, A4A)

Stimming (if it isn’t harming)

Advocating for diagnosis is one thing. Being a bully online is another. It’s a disability not a quirk, a lot of self diagnosed people know it’s a disability. We can identify the actual problems in the self diagnosing community but a lot of us aren’t those.

We’re valid

Hi love 🥰, hope you’re ready to start the new week off strong. I wanted to share something and maybe you could give your insight?

Here’s my weird opinion on upcoming Pluto in Aquarius

Since 2008 we’ve seen technology rise to the top and we’ve seen how corporations take advantage of that power (Pluto in Cap)

When Pluto changes sign Pluto is here to fix and purge. To transform. Pluto does not Give a Fuck if you change for the better or worse. Just as long as you change.. Technology has run amuck. AI putting small artists out of business. Amazon being the sole source of shipping. Facial recognition identifying protesters and law enforcement locking them up. The excessive screen time, we’ve kinda become slaves to our screens. We literally live and breathe our tech gadgets. Pluto is going to fix that. Especially with it being in Aquarius… I mean yes I know Aquarius rules technology. But Aquarius also rules innovation, originality, authenticity. I think when Pluto goes into certain signs. The traits of those signs are what gets transformed/fixed/highlighted. So instead of seeing a rise in tech I think we’re going to see a fall in tech. Especially with Saturn being in Pisces. We’re seeing our technology is actually making us as a collective more anxious, obsessive. I say this because honestly the people have been hinting at it for some time. Everyone knows the phase “Go touch some grass” it’s literally an insult if ever said to you (sorry) but that’s a Go To insult for someone who has CLEARLY been on their phone too fucking long.

I think we’re going to see a rise in authentic tech. Tech that actually makes us happy. Homes built with high grade ventilation systems. Tech that’s actually useful like plastic clean up bots or completely accessible water filtration systems open 24/7 free for the public. Someone making an AI that detects racial bias. Tech that benefits the collective instead of the individual. But maybe I’m just disgustingly optimistic and don’t understand or know enough about astrology so this just sounds unfeasible. What do you think?

Thanks for reading ☺️

Thank you for writing to me! I enjoyed reading it :)

I honestly think that there will be a stronger focus on humanity as a whole rather than more and more individuality due to transits that you mention.

Though, I still not sure about authentic tech. I think here similarily to sustainability and green approach, this could be only discuss a lot, but not as much put into action. So I think it could still flop a little due to tech companies wanting profits and quick, creative, simple solutions.

@astroismypassion

self help comic yes i cried when i thought of this and drew it immediately