# Those Adults That Were Like Second Parents For You And Cared And Loved You Like So. Suddenly You Grew

A.F. Vandevorst installation for Arnhem Mode Biennale 2011

“A girl sleeping in a hospital bed in her A.F. Vandevorst dress. But here, the girl as well as the mattress and pillow are made out of candle wax. Once lit, what starts as a perfect image will slowly melt and perish during the biennale.”

I want to eat love and spit out the root (the arteries hidden under your flesh) and I want to drink so much of your blood that it cannot be differentiated from mine until we become one; time and memory will unfold and entangle in an entirely new way and our changeless stardust will explore and melt the milky way after we burn

new year, consistently corrosive me

i like playing dumb about not knowing things so someone who cares about me will gently explain it to me and i will feel loved once in a while

i also enjoy peoples faces lighting up when they get to explain something to me

and i care so much and ill probably care always but i need to change and grow and care about everything else because it is too much to be alive and i need to bear my sorrows elsewhere. i care, i care too much, i care always and anyways because im a carer, but i need to care about myself more right now

i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i don't care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do carei do care i do care i do care i do care i do.

Molly Des Jardin

me after screaming at everyone i know and isolating myself from my family and locking myself in my room because i think no one likes me or cares about me and the voice in my head said so and it practically runs my self esteem

sometimes i think about how hard it is for me to cry and how numb i feel about everything, i wish i was still a crybaby i miss who i was before i let the emptiness take me over

we live in a dirt house. the inside is dirt, the ground is dirt, there are worms engorging on my insides, and tired insects are trapped and wandering. and i feel so full of everything and yet i'm starving, i find no direction to blossom. you're the ceiling and i'm trying to claw under the door, so i grow out the window and i feel ike a dirty woman. i feel like ivy

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