Xxviii. The Aftermath

ii. start afresh

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWO ─ start afresh.

❛ i hate it here so i will go to secret gardens in my mind ❜

Narrator's Perspective

"Oy! You over there!" hollered the girl standing in line behind Yumi, "You're holding up the entire line. Hurry up, we don't have all day!"

Yumi's head swung to look at the girl who spoke, "Sorry," she murmured an apology as she caught up with the rest of the queue. Eunyoung stood in front of her, just as confused.

They both were clad in their high school uniforms, bringing back nostalgia which couldn't erase the feeling that they had gotten lost in time. Was this a hallucination? A flashback? Neither of them were able to figure it out. As they spotted an empty table and took a seat, Eunyoung looked around the massive hall, attempting to recognize it. A wave of deja vu came over her, "Where are we? Is this-" Her voice trailed off as she made sense of the familiarity.

"What? What is it?" asked Yumi in anticipation.

"This is our cafeteria from high school" she whispered, unable to believe it herself.

"This is Jagam High School?!" she shrieked, not realizing how much attention she had drawn to herself as a result. Heads turned to look at her and students began to whisper.

"What's wrong with her?"

"What a weirdo..."

"She's realizing this now?"

"Isn't that our senior?"

"Keep your voice down," Eunyoung shushed her, slapping her shoulder.

"I don't understand," Yumi's embarrassment never surfaced due to her desire to clear the foggy haze of confusion in her head.

"Beats me," Eunyoung sympathized, taking a bite of bibimbap from her plate. As the taste hit her tastebuds, a feeling of deja vu swept over her, "The nostalgia is crazy. What happened to us? How did we end up here?"

"It's almost as if we teleported between times."

💿

After gulping down their lunch as fast as humanly possible, Yumi and Eunyoung rushed to their old- or current- classrooms. They dashed through the hallways, which were almost empty during the lunch break and sprinted up the stairs.

On entering the classroom, Eunyoung went straight to the calendar hung on a softboard at the back of the room. "2008," she whispered.

"What?" gasped Yumi.

"We've time travelled to 2008," Eunyoung couldn't believe it herself. She reached for her desk, which was in the exact place it used to be fifteen years ago. Rummaging through her bag, she looked for the Sonaki CD. To her surprise, she found it in the front pocket, exactly as she had kept it after the concert. 

"Does this have anything to do with it?" Yumi queried.

"That's what I was thinking," she suddenly realized that Sunjae attended the adjoining school, which would mean...

A frantic Eunyoung tore down the hallway, each pounding step echoing her mounting worry. The stairs became a blur as she took them two at a time, the need to reach a certain destination gnawing at her. Her legs burned with exertion, but she pushed on, driven by an unseen force until finally, she burst through the school doors and sprinted towards the pool.

Just as she reached the gate, a gruff voice stopped her in her tracks. The stern watchman, his weathered face etched with disapproval, barred her entry. "This area is off-limits, child," he boomed. "Go back inside."

Undeterred, Eunyoung's determination only intensified. Skirting the perimeter of the building, her eyes scanned for a way to see what transpired within the forbidden zone. Finally, a glimmer of hope – a small, forgotten window offered a peek into the forbidden aquatic world. Relief washed over her as she peered through the dusty pane.

Inside, a scene unfolded before her eyes. The pool, usually a serene oasis, had transformed into a battlefield of friendly competition. Half a dozen boys, sleek figures cutting through the water, participated in what appeared to be a mock race. As they finished, their bodies erupted from the surface, a symphony of droplets and triumphant cheers.

Eunyoung's gaze darted across the pool deck, searching with frantic intensity. Then, amidst the jubilant chaos, she spotted him – Sunjae. Her heart, a heavy stone in her chest moments ago, began to lighten. There he was, clad in a swimming costume, a  blue towel slung casually over his bare torso. A genuine smile stretched across his face, a stark contrast to the dark premonition that had been haunting her. In that moment, the weight of the future, the knowledge of a terrible fate that awaited him, seemed to recede for a glorious, fleeting moment. All that mattered was the sight of him, alive and happy.

💿

Eunyoung's little rendezvous to the swimming pool of the neighboring school had cost her one entire History lecture. Lost in  worry and the subsequent relief of seeing Sunjae safe, she completely lost track of time. By the time she sheepishly crept back to her classroom door, a full hour had elapsed. The stern face of her History teacher greeted her, with surprise (given Eunyoung's usual punctuality), but with a hint of disapproval that quickly morphed into exasperation. 

The lecture was in full swing, and Eunyoung, red-faced and stammering apologies, was banished to the hallway. There she stood, for what felt like an eternity, the closed classroom door a barrier not just to the ongoing lesson but also a symbol of her own lapse in judgment. The droning murmur of lecture notes from within only amplified the emptiness in her stomach  from the gnawing guilt of disrupting class. 

Finally, after what seemed like an age, the dreaded hour ended, and a new teacher arrived. This one, perhaps sensing Eunyoung's remorse in her slumped posture and downcast eyes, took pity on her. With a curt nod and a muttered warning, the teacher unlocked the door, allowing Eunyoung to slink back in, vowing to never again let her emotions override her common sense.

Yumi greeted her with a teasing smile and gestured for her to sit down beside her. Attempting to shake off the embarrassment from her punishment, she took her seat and looked straight forward at the blackboard.

"What the hell did you do?" asked Yumi in whispers.

"I paid a visit to the swimming pool," she whispered back, her unwavering eyes glued to the backboard.

"Swimming pool? Why?" as she pondered over the possible reasons Eunyoung would go there, all of a sudden, the realization hit her. She smirked at Eunyoung, "Oh, I see how it is."

This time, Eunyoung turned to look at Yumi, understanding her implications, "Oh, shut up, You know it's not like that. I went so I could see Sunjae."

"In a swimming costume, that is," Yumi added cheekily.

"Stop putting words in my mouth and focus on the class."

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nayoung's notes: i had a lot of internal conflict (marcus brutus core 🎀) about how to start this scene. what i originally decided with delphi was that they wake up at home, but i thought it would be more fun if they ended up somewhere abruptly, and what better place to embarrass my (our) characters than in school? hope u liked it!

delphi's notes: i love the last dialogue between our characters ajnakds. nana and i would definitely have that kind of conversation lmfao.  eunyoung i know what you are ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

@the-one-and-only-delphi

next chapter: friday! (out now) list of chapters here!

xxix. blackout

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE ─ blackout.

❛ life is emotionally abusive and time can't stop me quite like you did ❜

Choi Yumi's Perspective

My eyes scanned my surroundings. White walls, busy chattering, phones ringing everywhere and a sense of urgency and busyness in the air. A police station. I looked down at myself. I was back in my formal attire- trousers, white shirt, blazer, that kind of stuff. Although I may have looked normal on the outside, I felt weird. I had never felt this way since my first day of work, and I could scarcely describe the feeling. Everything seemed new, and foreign, even though it was the same work I had done for most of my adult life. Maybe it was nostalgia because of the strange ache and longing in my heart.

Being a lawyer wasn't something I enjoyed. In fact, the last thing I enjoyed... I don't even want to think about it. I would feel a rush of adrenaline after winning a case, then the sense of emptiness would soon return to engulf me. It was an endless cycle that I was stuck in. 

There are certain cases that I receive that require me to go to the police station. This was one of them. I fiddled my thumbs anxiously- as if it was my first day on the job. I felt like an idiot; Which usually means something out of the ordinary was about to happen, so I braced myself accordingly. I had previously met the police when they came to my law firm, but today I had to meet a detective because it was a case of murder.

All of a sudden, an extremely familiar fragrance hit my nose. It came so unexpectedly that I nearly convinced myself that I was imagining it; but the reality was so evident. Slightly woody notes, like sun-warmed cedarwood and a sudden freshness, as if I was standing on a beach at dawn. The air around me was left fresh and alive and the scent was intoxicating and my mind wandered back to the first time I smelled it. It was almost as if I was back in high school, standing in the perfume shop, carefully picking out the perfect present.

I stood up, and taking a second to steady myself, I turned around rapidly to find myself face to face with a face even more familiar than the fragrance. I was met with those same beady cat eyes, but they seemed to have lost their spark. Kim Taesung. A voice in my head whispered his name, trying to grasp the reality in front of me. His disheveled hair had become tamer, and his bright and colorful apparel was replaced with hues of grey and black with a splash of olive green. He looked dull and dejected, and the glint of mischief had disappeared from his eyes. I had recognized him instantly, because his face had been imprinted in my mind. The rapid beating of my heart sounded in my ears, just like it had fifteen years ago. Yet, he looked like a completely different person. It was like someone had switched off the lights inside him.

"Choi Yumi?" he said it like a question mark, his eyebrows raised slightly.

"Do you two know each other?" the police officer behind him asked, confused. For a moment, his words his words faded away and I stood entranced before Kim Taesung, staring blankly. I felt the same I had the first time I saw him. But now, there was a rift between us that was too evident. He seemed so far away even though he was right in front of me. Something that was once new, fresh and full of hope had withered like flowers during the winter. 

"It's been a while," I said, snapping out of my trance, my lips curling upwards ever so slightly. My hand reached up subconsciously to rub the back of my neck.

He simply nodded, shifting his gaze at the ground and his effort to keep it professional was evident, and I would have laughed if I could, but I kept my lips zipped shut when the sound disappeared on the tip of my tongue.

The police officer who I had previously met (who's name I had already forgotten) looked at me curiously, probably hoping I could answer his earlier question.

"We went to the same high school," I told him curtly, plastering a fake smile and turning to look at Taesung, but never meeting his gaze. My eyes glazed over the badge on his jacket. Violent Crimes Division. It felt surreal that he had become a detective- just like his dad. 

Then, suddenly, our eyes met, and time seemed to freeze that exact moment. They're so dull. I thought to myself. I couldn't get over how depressed his eyes looked, like the spark had disappeared. They looked like they were crying out for help. It pained me to look at him that way, and a small part of me pointed an accusing finger at me. Was it my fault? Another voice in my head said that it was unfair. And that he didn't deserve to feel sad. I watched as his eyes shifted to the scar on my face, then shifted back to my eyes, as if he couldn't bear to look at my eyes. The look of pity on his face made me want to cry and scream.

I tore my eyes away, looking at the other police officer. I stole a quick glance at his badge, then said with my best professional smile, "Shall we begin?"

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: not yumi forgetting the other police officer's name 😭✋

delphi's notes: and this kids is why adulthood fucking suuuucks.(this pair of adults are not the best example though)

next chapter: saturday (out now!) list of chapters here!

xxxv. tunnel vision

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE ─ tunnel vision.

❛ we got nothing else to do, and nothing else to lose ❜

Narrator's Perspective

Eunyoung stood at Sunjae's doorstep, her backpack hanging from one shoulder as her legs shook nervously. The truth was that she was so insanely anxious. It was a foreign feeling to Eunyoung who tends to look at the positive aspect of every situation. But her stupid little crush on Sunjae had her considering all the horrible possibilities by which she could screw up. What if she stuttered and stammered like an idiot? What if she was too distracted and couldn't help Sunjae at all? All these trivial matters occupied her mind as she fidgeted with her clothes.

She then remembered the previous night...

Eunyoung paced around her room biting her lip in frustration. After all the lengths she went to to prevent Sunjae's death, nothing had changed in the future. He was still dead. And time was running out. Depression. Suicide. These words rang in her mind in an endless loop. They made her heart twist and ache unbearably. What could he possibly have been going through for him to make such a decision? 

Fear crept in her mind. The future seemed to be advancing like a hungry beast, ready to take Sunjae away from her once again. Then, all of a sudden, like a light had been turned on in her brain, she had an idea. Her eyes shifted to her window, which was facing Sunjae's. His window was open, and no one seemed to be there inside. 

She scrambled through her drawers and pulled out a blank, blue sheet.

"I know life's tough sometimes. It feels like everything is falling apart and the world has turned it's back. But you need to hold on to hope. Lean on your loved ones. Because they're the ones who are always rooting for you."

She poured her heart out onto the paper and made a bunch of  folds. Eunyoung herself was amazed at her memory and at how her mind suddenly pulled out everything she learnt from some random origami workshop she attended. Everything had gone through one ear and come out through another. But, somehow she seemed to remember just one thing. Paper airplanes. Destiny had been working in strange ways, leading her to Sunjae.

Then, she did one of the most irrational things in her life. She leaned on her window sill and threw the paper airplane as she watched it land inside his house.

Taking in a deep breath, Eunyoung reached out and rang the doorbell. She waited before the blue gate till Sunjae's father emerged from the main entrance of their house and approached her with a wide, toothy grin. Eunyoung returned his smile. It had been a while since she had seen his father and she was glad to see his warm greeting.

"Oh, come in, dear," he said, unlatching the front door.

As they stepped into the house, her father motioned her to sit down. Sitting down on the little sofa in the center of their living room. It was a cozy little dwelling, with warm lamps and light bulbs and a brown carpet lying across the floor.

"So, Eunyoung," his father began, "What brings you here?"

"I'm here to help Sunjae with math," the moment those words fell out of Eunyoung's mouth, Sunjae's father's expression suddenly turned grave. She chuckled at the worry on his face.

"Ah, yes," he said, sounding embarrassed, "It is quite a... ehh... shameful thing. He got an earful from me already."

"Nothing to worry about, really," she said with a small laugh, "He'll catch up soon."

"Well, if there's anyone who can help him, it's you!"

While Eunyoung's ears turned red at Sunjae's blind faith in her abilities, she heard a thudding as Sunjae's tall figure emerged from a flight of stairs. He was dressed in simple, black track pants and a navy blue tshirt, and yet Eunyoung's eyes turned wide. The mere sight of him made her feel like her heart would jump out of her chest.

"Sorry I kept you waiting," he said sheepishly, shooting her a dimpled smile that she hadn't seen in far too long. His smile never failed to fill her heart with a comfortable warmth that she could easily get used to. A blush crept up her cheeks that she tried her best to hide.

"Nonsense," she waved her hand in front of her face, "Your father is a great conversationalist."

"Pfft!" his dad laughed heartily, "You flatter me."

"Should we get started?" Sunjae interrupted rather impatiently. His dad smiled knowingly, aware of his eagerness to spend time with Eunyoung.

"Oh, yes let's do that."

They made their way up the stairs, then entered Sunjae's bedroom. The door shut with a thud behind them, and they were alone at last. Eunyoung scanned his room briefly, a smile surfacing on her lips. There were trophies, certificates, medals on display and her eyes lingered on the photos of Sunjae. 

"There's a lot of blue in here," she observed. Suddenly, her smile grew wider as she spotted the blue paper from the paper airplane she had sent the previous day.

"My favorite color," Sunjae said, the words basically fumbled out of his mouth. His heart was pounding in his chest, daring to jump out any second. His gaze lingered on Eunyoung. She wore a pair of dark blue, comfortable-looking jeans with a dusty pink top. She looked as pretty as ever, with her long, flowing hair and sparkling eyes. He quickly looked away, feeling the warmth on his face.

They sat down at his desk, and Sunjae's lethargic and sloth-like movement indicated his unwillingness to study. The truth was that if he could, he could sit and stare at Eunyoung in admiration for the rest of his life. Snapping out of his trance, he blinked his eyes rapidly and took out his math textbooks .

"What are your grades like in other subjects?" she inquired, turning to look at him.

"A B is probably the most I've ever gotten," he answered, his ears turning red in shame. This wasn't exactly the side of himself he wanted Eunyoung to know.

The small, rather elegant chuckle that escaped her mouth filled his ears, "You don't have to look so embarrassed, Sunjae, I'm here to help you, not judge you."

There it was again. She had such a way with words, the way she weaved them just the right way. Her words never failed to be a source of strength for him. This newfound vulnerability filled him with a sense of comfortability instead of the usual unease and fear that came with opening up to someone.

"So, what do you hate most about math?"

"Algebra," he said, sounding quite petrified.

"Then let's start with that."

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: sunjae's dad being the best wingman ever.

delphi's notes: FEAR OF ALGEBRA IS SO REALL. eunyoung you demon.

next chapter: saturday (out now) list of chapters here!

xxxvii. home is where the heart is

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN ─ home is where the heart is.

❛ i know it's always about me, i love you, i'm sorry ❜

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

Every cell in my body seemed to be screaming at me to run. To go back home. But, somehow I felt like my feet were rooted to the ground as I stood in the deserted playground. A tall streetlight peered over the area, which was the only source of illumination on that moonless night. The stars had disappeared from the sky, as if to express their disapproval at my irrational decision. I wasn't able to control myself. I had let my curiosity get the better of me, and I had showed up at the spot my father decided would be our meeting spot.

I wanted to believe so badly that he had changed. That he was trying to set things right. There was a part of me that wanted to meet him and tell him that I missed him. And that if he wanted to come back, I would let him. I wanted to believe that I was worthy, and maybe I could finally have a proper family in the stereotypical way. I had spent my entire life watching kids get treated with love and care by their fathers, and not once had I experienced such a bond.

Then, I spotted him. His face had weathered and become worn due to time, but it was undoubtedly him. Chiseled, sharp features with curly, messy hair that hung around his eyes. His previously clean shaven face had now grown a beard. He flashed a smile, approaching me and siting down on the bench next where I was standing.

"You've grown up so well," he whispered.

The pride in his voice made my heart swell with a strange kind of warmth. "Mom did a good job, huh?"

"That, she did," he agreed, the weary smile on his face never ceasing. It was then that I noticed the bags under his eyes.

"You seem tired," I observed, worried.

"It's nothing," he said rather abruptly. The smile suddenly fell from his face and his blinking gaze wandered, pretending to scan their surroundings. I found his sudden shift in behavior quite strange, and a confused frown formed on my face. He turned to me again, but didn't look in my eyes.

"Eunyoung, actually," He began, rubbing his hands against each other, thinking of what to say.

"What is it?"

"I have a favor to ask you," he mumbled out, but Eunyoung heard his voice sound loud and clear, ringing in her ears, "I'm actually in a lot of debt right now. I can barely afford my rent, and everything is falling apart. If you could just talk to your mother and convince her-"

"Stop!" I cried out, my voice shaking with rage and disappointment. My eyes burned with tears and I had to gather all my strength to speak, "Just- just, shut up. I should have known. Why else would you come back? Have you ever stopped to think how much damage you caused? You can't just waltz back into our life and expect that we'll welcome you with open arms. I was the idiot to believe anything you said. Just, get lost, I swear!"

"But Eunyoung, we're family?"

"Family?" I repeated, my voice trembling, as tears began spilling out of my eyes, "You don't get to call me or mom your family. You lost that privilege the moment you packed your bags and left home."

He opened his mouth to spit out another pathetic excuse, but I had finally had enough. I bolted out of there, mustering all the willingness inside me to get away from him. The tears spilled out uncontrollably, blurring my vision as my legs propelled me forward in the direction of home.

 💿

Even as I reached Sunjae's dad's restaurant, I couldn't stop crying. All my hopes had been shattered by my father's careless words and demeanor. I heaved another heavy sob, that choked up my throat and made my heart ache with uncontrollable sorrow. 

Instead of going home, I went the opposite way, stopping near a wall where I was sure no one I know could find me. My knees feeling suddenly weak and wobbly, I sat down right on the pavement and buried my head in my knees. I felt my tears soak my pants but none of that mattered then. My weeping sounded too loud in the deserted alleyway as I started to feel physical pain too. I couldn't believe I had been naive enough to fall into such a trap. Even after my mother warned me...

"Eunyoung?" the oh-so-familiar voice sent a jolt through my body as I raised my head slowly, trying to make sure I heard correctly. I was right. There I was, face to face with a concerned Sunjae looking at me with furrowed brows and glassy eyes full of worry and confusion. I suddenly felt embarrassed; Ashamed that he had to see me like this- falling apart. I stood up hastily, trying to hide my face and blink away my tears.

"Sunjae..." Another sob choked me as the words refused to roll off my tongue. He seemed to understand in that moment. Slowly, he moved towards me and reached out his hand to pull me by the waist into his warm embrace. My tears nearly evaporated as heat crept up my face. My head rested gently on his shoulder as I soaked up all the comfort he gave me. His grip around my waist tightened as I felt his hand caress my head.

Sunjae seemed to have this superpower whenever he was around. All my worries would warp and dissolve into nothingness and my heart would instantly lighten. Every little touch sent sparks flying across my skin, making me feel giddy but at the same time compelling me to give in. Around him, I wasn't afraid to be vulnerable. My trust for him was like an instinct I couldn't fight no matter how much I tried. That was probably why, before I could comprehend what was happening, the moment his caring voice asked, "What's wrong?" I poured my heart out, never letting go of him.

The whole time I spilled my greatest worries out to him, he never let go of my heart. His firm yet gentle grip offered solace I didn't believe anyone could give. 

"Seeing someone as optimistic and cheerful as you cry is heartbreaking, Eunyoung. He doesn't deserve your tears. Focus your energy on those you love. And on those who love you."

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: the way sunjae basically said i love you-

delphi's notes: everyone deserves a sunjae in their lives

next chapter: saturday (out now!) list of chapters here!

☆★ ﹑ you keep 𓆪﹒ his shirt ;

  ࣪𓇻 ݁ ﹔ he keeps  ⭒ his word ⁺　ׂ

( +🥐 ) ｡˚ ִ⋆｡˚ like we were in paris . . . >_< @the-one-and-only-delphi

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE DAZAI KINNIE

edit: LMAOOO IN ALL THE EXCITEMENT I FORGOT THAT IT'S DAZAI'S BDAY TOO ASJKSHFA HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO DAZAI LOL

i don't think @the-one-and-only-delphi being a dazai kinnie gets any realer than her sharing a birthday with him lmao what a flex

xxi. clarity in the darkness

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE ─ clarity in the darkness.

❛ and i know i make the same mistakes every time. ❜

Choi Yumi's Perspective

See, I've always prided myself on the fact that I had the ability to make rational decisions. That's why, when I stood in the dark hallways of Jagam High School after hours with the Eclipse members and Sunjae, I felt like the biggest idiot to ever walk this Earth. What had gotten into me? Why in god's name would I ever agree to something like this? I felt like slapping myself for getting swayed by Inhyuk's persuasion. However, there was another storm brewing in my mind that haunted my thoughts. I was doing this for Taesung. For his birthday. I refused to let myself think of it.

"Hyunsoo," hissed Inhyuk.

"What?" he responded in a similar fashion.

"Stop breathing so loudly," he made an effort to keep his volume as low as possible, "You're going to wake the dead."

"Shut your trap."

"Um, Guys?" Sunjae intervened, "We've been standing at the door for a while. Don't you think we should start looking?"

"He's right, we should get it over with and vamoose before anyone catches us," I chimed in.

"Where do you think all the student records are kept?" asked Inhyuk. Despite all our efforts to speak as quietly as possible, our voices echoed in the empty hallways.

"Let's check the staff room?" I suggested.

We moved like a gang of thieves, sticking close to each other as fear gripped our bones. A cold gush of wind sent a shiver through my body as we inched closer to the staff room. I never realised I was such a coward until now. Paranoia had consumed me entirely. I dreaded the consequences of this reckless adventure. Someone speaks an octave too high, someone drops a heavy object, one small mistake and they all would be dead meat.

We were faced with the extensive staff room, and rows of tables and chairs, sending confusion through us all.  "Do you know where his homeroom teacher sits?"

"Here," said Hyunsoo, Eclipse's drummer. He followed him to a desk by the door. Inhyuk took the initiative to reach out and shuffle through the files lying on the table. The shuffling and rustling of papers sounded painfully loud in the silence of the deserted school. "Quieter!" hissed Sunjae.

Inhyuk retrieved the thin sheet with the personal details of students pinned on the soft board. Just then, as if a manifestation of my worry, slow, steady footsteps echoed in the hallway outside the room. Panic surged through my body as I felt my breathing become unsteady.

Inhyuk got a hold of the sheet holding Taesung's information. Hearing the footsteps getting closer, I motioned everyone to duck under the table with my shaking hands. As we all crouched under the table, my body shook with terror. A bright flashlight flashed on the ground next to us. Everyone held their breath as a voice spoke, "I could have sword there was something..."

The light faded out of sight as all of us heaved a sigh of relief. "I got a picture!" whispered Inhyuk, his voice laced with triumph.

"Great, now let's get out of here!"

💿

Ryu Sunjae's Perspective

Going back to school after my surgery was an experience in itself. I received sympathy from peers and teachers that I had never received in my years in high school. It seemed as if the world was showering me in pity, rubbing salt in my fresh wound that had gotten no time to heal. I felt dejected, and it showed. I slouched in class, stared blankly into space and zoned out when someone was speaking to me. In this confusing haze of people's sympathy towards me, I found solace in the blue cap I wore─ Eunyoung's thoughtful gift. It rested atop my head like a reminder of her warmth and the gentleness of her voice.

Eunyoung was different. She treated me like she always had. Through all the changes I observed in everyone's attitude towards me, Eunyoung stood like a guiding light, staying constant through my adversity. I found comfort in her unchanging demeanor. 

As she took her usual seat next to me as per usual, the familiarity of the scenario sent tingles through my body. I smiled secretly to myself on seeing her face. How could she take away my breath? Just by being herself? I must be crazy. 

I noticed her yawn next to me, covering her mouth with her hand. Her blinking became slower as there was a visible struggle for her to keep her eyes open.

"Long day?" I asked.

"The substitute teacher for geography did a fantastic job," she let out another yawn, "At putting the class to sleep."

I chuckled. She looked up at me, smiling with sleepy eyes. 

💿

I felt Eunyoung's head fall gently on my shoulder. I slowly turned to look at her head resting peacefully on my shoulder. Thankfully, it wasn't the shoulder that got operated on. I would hate to push her away. A few strands of her hair framed her angelic face. Her soft breath fanned my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. The gentle rise and fall of her chest was rhythmic and calming, a stark contrast to the chaos of the day. A wave of protectiveness washed over me as I realized how vulnerable she looked in this moment.

I couldn't help but trace the outline of her face with my eyes. Her lips were slightly parted, and her eyelashes cast delicate shadows on her cheeks.

This has happened before. I remembered the moment we had previously shared with shocking clarity. It replayed in my mind like my favourite scene from my favourite movie. The point of contact that made my heart flutter back then, did the same today. The tingling feeling surged through my body, just like that day. She looked as perfect as ever─ maybe more. Every moment I spent with her, I found myself wishing it would last forever.

I stole another glance at her. A warmth spread through me, a comforting familiarity that I hadn't felt in a long time. This was a moment of peace, a sanctuary from the world outside. And in that moment, I knew that I would do anything to protect this fragile, beautiful girl beside me.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nana's notes: eunyoung if falling asleep on the bus was a job 💸💸

delphi's notes: ryu sunjae, the biggest loser to exist ;)

next chapter: saturday (out now!) list of chapters here!

xiii. pieces of my shattered heart

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

CHAPTER THIRTEEN ─ pieces of my shattered heart.

❛ even in my worst times, you saw the best in me ❜

Narrator's Perspective

Taesung found himself lingering around the music club after the rest of his bandmates had left. He tried his best to explain to himself why he was waiting there. He had nothing to do after going home anyway. May as well hang around there for a while; But at the back of his mind, he knew he was waiting in hopes of seeing her.

As if she was listening to his thoughts, Yumi emerged from her usual practice room. Trying to act nonchalant, he pretended to look around.

"You're still here?" she asked. He turned to look at her, "Yeah, I'm just passing time."

"Oh."

The awkwardness in the air was painfully obvious.

"Why are you standing there like that?" he asked her.

"Like what?"

"Don't you have to go home?"

"Why are you trying to get rid of me?" she questioned suspiciously, "Are you in trouble? Doing something wrong?"

"Why do you assume the worst of me?" he demanded of her.

"Can you blame me?" she shrugged, "You're the spitting image of a delinquent. You look like the kind of guy who would beat up kids in a dark alleyway."

"Thanks for telling me what you really think of me."

"You're welcome," she answered with a sarcastic smile.

He scoffed, getting up and making his way towards the exit. Yumi was left confused at his strange behaviour, but still followed him out, realizing she needed to go home.

She saw Taesung standing sighing on the pavement. In a split second, before she could comprehend what was happening, he turned around rapidly, grabbing her by the waist and looking into her eyes with an unblinking gaze. The thumping of Yumi's heart sounded in her ears. The touch ignited a spark inside her as her eyes widened. She could hardly make sense of what she felt at that moment.

"Is she gone?" he asked.

"Huh?" Yumi squeaked out, conscious of the warmth on her face.

"The girl standing across the streets; Is she gone?"

"There's no one there."

She stumbled backwards as he let go with no word of warning. There was no way to calm the rapid beating of her heart. All she could think of was that she wanted to run away. She wasn't ready to face whatever the hell she was feeling.

"I have to study for a test," she yelped, breaking into a run.

She ran all the way home.

💿

Eunyoung stood waiting at the bus stop. She distinctly remembers going home alone every day in the past, but somehow, today Sunjae's absence affected her greatly. She missed his company, his sweet gestures and the way he made her laugh. The bus doors opened in front of her. There was no queue as per usual, but she couldn't get onto the bus. It felt as if a supernatural force was holding her back. In her hesitation, the automatic bus doors closed and the bus went on without her.

Her feet led her straight to the swimming pool. It was almost an unconscious decision. When it came to Sunjae, she seemed to act without thinking. She felt it was strange as she had always been a rational person, so why was she acting like this now?

On spotting one of the swim team members she interviewed, she went up to him and asked, "Hey, I was wondering if you've seen Sunjae?"

"You're looking for Sunjae?" he repeated, his voice laced with hesitation to answer her question, "It might not be my place to tell you this, but he was rushed to the hospital this morning."

Choi Eunyoung's Perspective

My breathing had become heavy, my vision blurred with tears and my entire body trembled in shock as I stumbled up the hospital stairs to see where Sunjae was. I could hardly believe it; I thought I averted his injury. How could this happen? How could I let this happen?

The lady at the reception told me that he had just come for a check-up and consultation and that she couldn't reveal anything more. After that, they practically kicked me out of the place and I was left sitting on the bench outside the hospital, my eyes spilling out buckets of tears.

The familiar pang of self-doubt twisted in my gut. A wave of nausea washed over me – a crushing failure to safeguard him. My mind spun, questioning my very presence in this past. Was I just a fabricated hope, a delusion of control? Was Sunjae's fate an immovable monolith, destined to crush him regardless of my intervention? The questions echoed in the hollowness of my chest, a chilling mirror to the grief that shattered me upon learning of his death. It felt as if my heart, once a fragile hope, had shattered into a million, irreparable pieces, each shard piercing through my skin as an unwelcome revelation dawned upon me.

Ryu Sunjae's Perspective

The palm of my father's hand crashed against my cheek, pain erupting on my face. Tears began to form in my eyes as I avoided his gaze. I had no desire to look at the disappointment in his eyes, which I already felt from within. The meagre physical pain couldn't compare to the storm of self-hatred that raged within me. Years of gruelling training, the sting of chlorine in my eyes, the ache in my muscles─ all replayed in my mind as if I needed to be reminded of everything I went through during my time as a swimmer that had now come to an abrupt halt. 

"You dare talk about quitting in front of me! If you ever say such nonsense again, don't you ever think of coming home!"

That was the last straw for Sunjae.  He ran blindly, the sting of tears mixing with the salty remnants of the pool on his face. He didn't care where his feet were taking him, just as long as they were taking him away from the crushing weight of his father's disappointment and the prison of his own unfulfilled dreams. His vision blurred to the point where he could no longer see the road in front of him.

Just then, he felt the touch of a familiar, delicate hand grab hold of his wrist and he came to a stop. As he wiped his tears, the sight of Eunyoung standing before him became increasingly clear. He was stunned, momentarily forgetting his sorrow that came crashing back in an instant. That was when he noticed the tears flowing from Eunyoung's eyes as she embraced him in a despairing hug. He could feel her sobbing against his shoulder, breathing heavily.

"Eunyoung, I─"

"I know," she cried as her grip around his shoulders tightened. 

Sunjae too began to sob uncontrollably, wrapping his arms around Eunyoung's waist. Words were unnecessary. In that embrace, Sunjae found a solace he hadn't known he craved. The weight of his father's disappointment, the crushing burden of his secret – it all seemed a little less unbearable with her arms wrapped around him. He clung to her silently in the middle of that dark narrow lane as the world around them seemed to dissolve.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩⋆｡° ✮

nayoung's notes: i just want to be hugged by sunjae. that is my new goal in life. this chapter was such a rollercoaster ride. hope you enjoyed!

delphi's notes: yumi's accusations are too funny istg. sunjae and eunyoung must be protected o((>ω< ))o

next chapter: saturday list of chapters here!

( + 🥂 ) ⁺ ˳ ★ cause i dropped your hand while dancing . . .

♩ ⁺ * 𝒴ou won't remember all my champagne problems . . .

like the moodboard? it's a teaser for an upcoming fanfic! make sure u follow me and stay tuned! thank you, bye!! <33

｡˚ ִ⋆｡ i've got a lot to pine about ;

.˳⁺ i've got a lot to live without . . .

like the moodboard? it's for my lovely runner oc: choi eunyoung! click here to read @the-one-and-only-delphi and my lovely runner fanfic. make sure u follow me and stay tuned! thank you, bye!! <3