As a bisexual, it sickens me that some people WILL keep scrolling.
Inspirational words for freelancers, hourly paid workers and salarymen alike
(There will be stickers, watch this space :,,)
Liberty. Reason. Justice. Civility. Edification. Perfection.
The Tenets of the Courier embody a paladin's commitment to delivering the mail with utmost integrity and professionalism.
Handle with Care: Treat anything entrusted to you as preciously as you would your own possessions.
Discrete Delivery: When others confide in you, do not betray their trust. Let none but the intended recipient pry upon what you carry.
Swift Postage: Do your best to fulfill your promises as promptly as possible. Punctuality is a virtue.
To the Letter: Strive to fulfill your oaths exactly as you pledged them. Your word is your promise.
You gain oath spells at the paladin levels listed.
3rd Level: Expeditious Retreat, Illusory Script 5th Level: Animal Messenger, Arcane Lock 9th Level: Sending, Tongues 13th Level: Legally Distinct Secret Chest, Freedom of Movement 17th Level: Dream, Teleportation Circle
When you choose this Oath at 3rd-level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options:
Postage Stamp: As an action, you mark an object with a magical postage stamp. When creating this stamp, you choose a creature you or an adjacent ally are familiar with to be the object's recipient. This stamp persists for a number of hours equal to twice your paladin level, until the stamped object is delivered to its chosen recipient, or it is dismissed as a bonus action. While holding the stamped object, you can spend an action to magically detect what direction its recipient is in, and approximately how far away they are from you. If the recipient does not want to be located by you, it can make a Wisdom Saving Throw to elude this detection. If you are relying on an ally's familiarity, they get Advantage on this save. If they succeed, they are immune to this effect for 24 hours. You may only have one magical stamp at a time. If you place another, the previous one is immediately dismissed.
This Side Up: As an action, you can use your Channel Divinity to ward a creature or object against toppling. One creature or object within 10 feet becomes immune to the Prone condition. If the target is an object, it must be light enough for you to carry. If the target is an object, it gains Resistance to bludgeoning, force, and thunder damage. If the warded creature or object falls, it may ignore the first 10' of the fall when determining fall damage. These effects last for a number of minutes equal to your Charisma score, minimum 3.
Neither rain nor sleet nor hail will stop your delivery of the mail. Starting at 7th level, you emit an Aura of Determination. You and allies within 10' cannot have their speed reduced to less than their base speed when walking, crawling, jumping, or flying. This includes anything that would halve movement, such as Difficult Terrain or Exhaustion; or impose any other fraction-based penalty to speed. You cannot grant any of these effects while you are unconscious.
At 18th level, the range of this aura increases to 30 feet.
Starting at 15th level, if you are targeted by a spell that targets only you, you may use your Reaction to instead have the spell target its caster. Use the original caster's Spell Save DC, Spell Attack Bonus, and Spellcasting Ability where applicable. If the spell required a Spell Attack Roll, re-roll the attack versus the caster. Once you use this ability, you must finish a short or long rest before you can use it again.
At 20th level, you can assume the form of a celestial courier. Using your action, you undergo a transformation that grants you the following benefits for 1 hour:
Wings sprout from your back and grant you a flying speed of 60 feet.
Allies who begin their turn within 30' of you gain a 10' bonus to their speed that turn.
Add your Charisma bonus to your Initiative Rolls.
Once you use this feature, you can't use it again until you finish a long rest.
Go forth, swift and trustworthy courier! You are the glue that holds society together!
When you hear a new song on the radio and you’re desperately trying to pick a notable phrase so you can google it later
Ok look, I fucking loved the floaties that were being used in the community, but often found myself squinting at how tiny, and often times hard to read they were (for me at least). So, seeing as I’m a grumpy old dude, and my eyes are easily strained, I started making my own. Bigass, and much easier to read! Also, nice and consistent! Which I guess is a bit of a pet peeve of mine. This is the Masterpost for all the Floaties I’ve made! Examples:
Full collection (700+ in seperate categories on seperate posts to keep tumblr from dying) in the read more section. Free to use as long as you give credit and don’t edit. Made by me -> @shintari / @ambivalence-and-torpor
Can’t find what you Want? Want custom floaties like these? Check out my Floatie Commissions
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it’s like he knows I’m going to take his balls today
Right...
So about georg...
A low stone chair that, if I’m understanding Anglo-Saxon law correctly, made it illegal to attack or arrest anyone sitting in it.
"Remember that photo from middle school? The one with the sweater?"
"WHY ARE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS?"
"Because it's funny."
The hero’s secret identity is revealed. Surprisingly, their enemies have enough honor to not go after their loved ones or lord over their personal life.
(twitter)
Or a Plague Doctor. Yes, I'm 19 Yes, 90% of my posts will be whimsical reblogs
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