BURY ME FACE DOWN — DAINSLEIF
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★⋆. ࿐ PAIRING — Dainsleif x Princess!Reader
★⋆. ࿐ SUMMARY — In a land where the gods' gaze did not fall, there are those who dream of dreaming. Khaenri'ah, a nation who did not follow any archon but bowed to a king, was home to those who longed for a world without the weight of Celestia looming over their shoulders. But dreams end, and nightmares can take root— especially once their hidden corner is put under the microscope of the gods.
★⋆. ࿐ WARNINGS — Lore & theory based world building. Pre-Cataclysm Khaenri'ah. Readers visions are meant to be dysphoric & chaotic.
“The end of the Drekaöld’s is nigh, just as you predicted.”
You looked up from the book you had your nose buried in, facing your tutor who had been sitting across from you. It was as if he was waiting for the right moment to tell you what you already knew.
You rose an eyebrow, gently closing the book in your hands, “Yggdrasil has yet to fail me, Master Frode. My father and the sage's may not believe in my sights, but you of all people should know they are true.”
He gave you a flat look, used to the slight smugness you radiated at being told another one of your sights were ringing true. From the first time he'd watched your face go blank and seen your hands rapidly scribble images onto a blank page, he knew you had been blessed by Yggdrasil. Ever since you were a babe, really. Born under the tree of life just as the first Bough Seer had been.
Frode was one of the greatest scholars that Khaenri'ah had. It was the reason he taught not just you, but your elder brother Finn, and it was the reason he was your father's regent. His family started off as scribe's for Khaenri'ah’s first king, and knowledge was passed down with each generation. Who better to take the throne if something were to happen to the royal family than those in the Alberich clan? One day, his son could possibly be regent to Finn.
“The legacy of the Bough Seer has been spoken throughout generations,” Frode let out a sigh. “It isn't that your father and the sages don't believe in your gift. It is that they are afraid of it.”
They were. The sages never wanted to hear talk of what sight the tree of life gives you. Their fear of Celestia not only had your nation underground and far from their gaze, it had the people pushing to get further away. Time, money, and resources were being dumped into bringing machines that could drill to the inverted surface, but there wasn't much progress with it. All in hopes that one day the people could see the sun shining again.
Khaenri'ah had always been shrouded in darkness– from the minute that Celestia had dropped a nail on their ancestors in Sal Vindagnyr. Above the surface, tragedy struck those seeking refuge, and underground everything they had worked for was smashed to pieces. Up until finding the small corner of the world where they couldn't be found, the odds of survival were not high.
The land they resided in now was built on blood, loss, and sheer spite to keep living without Celstia breathing down their neck. All because the ancestors had learned certain truths and began to rely on each other rather than the god’s bounties.
“Are you calling my father a coward, Master Frode?” your lip tugged upward, a teasing smile gracing your lips at the startled look on his face. “You'd be correct, I suppose. The people do not have the slightest clue a Bough Seer was once again reborn, even though in the past they were once the king's greatest asset.”
Very few kings of the Eclipse Dynasty were fortunate enough to have a seer by their side. They were born once every five hundred years, and they were blessed by Yggdrasil with a sight that allowed them to see glimpses of what was to come. While most foresaw how the harvest would go, and if natural disaster would strike, it was still better than anything the sages could guess. With a Bough Seer, they were practically useless.
However, your father chose to ignore your gift. He depended on the sages rather than you. Maybe it was because he feared the wrath of gods that you weren't supposed to believe in, or maybe it was because every time you were around him, all he could see was your mother.
When you told him that Nidhug, Khaenri'ah’s true guardian, was going to fall ill and pass on, he refused to hear you. The sages believed his time would come far in the future. He was in perfect health, and there was no need to worry.
But Nidhug was old. He had been around since the beginning of Khaenri'ah’s time. Your ancestors spent nine days fighting him, nine weeks gaining his trust, and nine months taming him before they could even think about touching the soil for anything other than farming. A dragon who had lived for thousands of years, alone until your people had found him.
The dragonheirs were few and far between, eventually wiped out due to their untamable nature despite countless attempts to tame them as well. There was no creature who could take his place.
Weeks ago, you'd seen his fate. The way he barely moved an inch when approached, his labored breathing, and how long it took him to pry his eyes open when he was spoken to. He was going to die, and Khaenri'ah would no longer have its greatest defense.
“I'm sure the meeting will be over soon,” Frode let out a sigh. “Sir Dainsleif will be able to take you to see him.”
You shook your head, “You could always accompany me as well. Unless—”
“Father!” A child's voice called out, the rapid patter of tiny footsteps echoing off the wall. “Look! Look what Master Gustav taught me!”
The boy was no older than seven, his hair styled to match his fathers– the top section pulled into a ponytails the rest laid down flat. You thought it was cute, how he always tried to look and act like the older man. Although he took after his mother Svana, with his tanned skin and blue hair, he did have Frode’s eyes.
The white haired man went to scold his son for interrupting when you spoke up instead, “May I see too, Kaeya?”
It was almost as if he just realized you were there as he came to a stop in front of his father. His eyes widened, almost dropping what he had in his hand and reaching out to grab Frode’s arm. He froze, glancing at the elder man with a look that screamed for help. Kaeya had always been shy. Immediately embarrassed if he spoke too loud or gained unwanted attention. This time, it was because he didn't notice you, the princess he always saw but had barely spoken three words to.
Frode nodded at the boy, and Kaeya held out a small wooden animal, one that looked to be carved and whittled by his own hand. Even though it lacked major details, it held just enough to make out what it was.
“Master Gustav said a dragon protects us,” Kaeya forced himself to speak. “He taught me how to carve the wood. I made it for mother, do you think she’ll like it?”
You smiled, gently taking his hand in yours before looking over his creation with more thought than before. You nodded your head in response, “I think she’ll love it. Do you think you could make one for me too? I can take you to see the real dragon in return.”
The thought of seeing Nidhug had Kaeya immediately nodding his head in agreement. He wanted to go now, but didn't dare push his luck. Frode was not too pleased with the idea of his son being around a beast, but if anyone could keep the dragon in line, it was Dainsleif, the captain of the Black Serpent Knights and your personal guard.
“I wish to be a knight like you when I get older,” Kaeya absentmindedly told Dainsleif as the three of you walked the path to the sage's temple.
He was stopping to pick up rocks and trying to catch butterflies as you went, forcing you and Dainsleif to stop walking long enough to drag his attention back to the task at hand. Both of you were patient, knowing he was young and easily distracted.
“Is that so?” Dainsleif questioned him, slight amusement in his tone. “It will take a lot of training, bravery, and strength to become a knight.”
Kaeya nodded, already knowing this from the minute he was given the wooden sword that he had sheathed at his hip. He was determined, despite knowing how difficult it would be. He was too young to truly understand now, but he would be giving up the chance at an education, at learning what he would need to know in order to one day be a regent. The young one seemed to think he could do both, and no one had the heart to tell him that wasn't the case.
There were days when you and Dainsleif would spend time at the Vaxandi library, going through books so he could learn to read better, or when you'd take him around the kingdom and explain the histories of the buildings that stood tall and proud for many millennia. Because his training as a knight took precedence over studies, Dainsleif was not as educated as other nobles.
“I know,” he responded, proud of his decision. “One day I'll be strong enough to protect the princess too.”
He sounded so determined, like he would weather any storm to make his words ring true. Resilience and determination like that was needed for a knight, and as long as he kept that in mind, he could do it. He was already learning about conduct and forms from his master but had yet to train with even the wooden sword.
Dainsleif could respect that, telling him he had complete faith in him as you all walked along the fields of mist. You could tell you were getting closer to the temple as the fog got thicker. Kaeya could barely see in front of him, reaching up to grab your hand before he could trip over rocks on the footpath. The way was lit, making it slightly easier to see as Dainsleif led the way.
It didn't take long for the three of you to reach the temple, the sages outside allowing you to pass through without question. You didn't even greet them as you headed for the cave where Nidhug resided, knowing you wouldn't be able to mind your manners. You warned them this was going to happen, and they refused to listen to them. But, that was how it had always been.
Kaeya let out a soft gasp when he saw the giant creature curled up on the ground. It was his first time seeing anything like it, and he almost couldn't believe his eyes. You frowned, approaching the beast slowly.
You knelt down by his head, Kaeya letting go of your hand and taking several steps back when the dragon opened his bright green eyes and looked at you. Nidhug let out a sharp breath, closing his eyes again as you reached out to pet him.
“Greyið,” you ran your hand over his dark scales, and he leaned into your touch. It was true. Nidhug was not well, his breathing was labored and he barely had the strength to move. “The beast’s last breath unbinds the old ways.”
Kaeya looked at Dainsleif, confused at your words. The knight simply shrugged in response. He was used to your way of speaking when it came to your sights. You were never direct, always vague or speaking in a sort of riddle. He figured you meant with Nidhug’s death, it would be the end of an era. Instead of giving Kaeya an answer, Dainsleif placed his hand on the small of his back and gently pushed him forward.
You turned, waving the boy forward. He apprehensively approached, crouching down next to you. He reached out as well, petting the creature as if it were a common house pet. His nose scrunched up at the texture felt against his fingertips– rough and uneven.
A sigh left the dragon, at least you assumed that's what the change in his breath was. Silence fell over you as three of you spent the dragon’s last moments with him. Kaeya didn't understand what exactly was happening, but he didn't dare break the silence. He stayed in his spot, showing Nidhug the same amount of love that you were giving to him.
When his labored breath came to a halt, a single tear trailed down your cheek. Nidhug was much more than a protector. He was a symbol of your nation’s separation from the Archons and Celestia. Now that he was gone there was no longer anything standing in their way. The Drekaöld had come to an end, the age of the dragon ending sooner than expected. The Black Serpent Knight's time was beginning, and something was telling you the strength of them combined was nothing in comparison to Khaenri'ah’s guardian.
Fire. Your hand furiously moved as you drew smoke and ash along the wall. Destruction. Despite being unable to make out clear details, the pit of unease that settled into your stomach told you that the ruins you were seeing were that of your nation. World… forget me. You paused, taking your free hand and wiping away the charcoal dust. You couldn't make sense of what you were seeing, what you were hearing. It didn't add up.
A land without sun. Khaenri'ah. The nation powered by the sólkerfi device, right? Wrong. Another land without natural light. But if not Khaenri'ah then where? Was there another nation who used an artificial sun? What did they have to do with anything? Was it war between us and them?
Field tillers. It was more clear now. Field tillers?…and the monsters that the Black Serpent Knights kept at bay, invading this other land. But, why? We have no qualms with anyone but Celestia. Taking on the gods seems unlikely, at least currently. What next? What happens next?
Death. Not in this strange land, but home. They waged war? Or was it us? But what reason do we have? It’s unclear, fuzzy. Who died? Father? Brother? The knights who vowed to protect us in times like this? Death. Death of who, of what, of where? Khaenri'ah, right? … No answer? Tell me what happens.
Khemia. Poison. Khemia? What is that? Unsafe. Gold. Make it make sense. Connect the pieces. None of them fit. It's made an even bigger puzzle. Why are you doing this? No time? Me or you? It doesn't matter. I’m afraid I don't understand. Don't tell me to be quiet.
Blood. Below and above the surface. No, no, this isn't right. Speak clearly. What do you want to say? It's never this blurry, it's always so clear. It doesn't make sense. Did I do something wrong? I didn't mean to upset– what? Not my fault. Of course it's not my fault, you're the one confusing me.
Sky Nail. Celestia awakens. The Archon War? Is it still ongoing? Why is that our concern? It's not. We have nothing to do with it. Do we? We don't. But why did they wake up? No time. I understand that.
Archon. Wrath. Arrogate. This is too much. Stop, stop, stop. What are we laying claim to? Why are the Archons mad? Because we don't worship them? Why do they care? They've cared about nobody but themselves for thousands of years. Yes, I agree, you should be angry with them too. Seems the legends are true.
Gold. Poison. Downfall. It's out of order. Why is it out of order? Are you telling me you're dying? You were poisoned? No, we wouldn't let that happen. We can't let that happen. We won't let that happen. We can eclipse Celestia, but you will always shine bright. Shine bright. An Archon who protects you… interesting. I–
World… forget me. Out of time.
“I thought I’d find you here,” A voice cut through the sound of erratic breathing and chalk dragging against stone. But the words fell on deaf ears, you were much too lost in your own head. You were frantic, running the chalk down into loose grit, desperately searching for another.
The newcomer held one out for you, watching as you worked along the wall with nothing but a flickering lantern as your light source. Just like always, he silently watched until a sharp breath passed your lips and the chalk clattered against the floor. You stood there, mumbling nonsense under your breath. He couldn't make out a word you were saying, but he could see your mouth moving.
“This…” you trailed off, absentmindedly wiping the black powder off on your nightgown. “This is bad. Not good.”
He approached you, lightly placing a hand on your shoulder. You jumped, not realizing he was there. Your heart was racing, much like your mind as you tried to piece together the broken puzzle.
“Dainsleif,” You exhaled slowly, trying to calm yourself down. “What are you doing here? It's late.”
A light chuckle left him, his blue eyes shining with amusement, “I could ask you the same thing, elska. Walking around without a guard? What would your father say?”
He could always find you here, especially after the day you had with losing Nidhug. He had a feeling you'd be getting your next sight soon, although he didn't realize it would be this close to the one that was just fulfilled.
You rolled your eyes, “As if he’d ever know. He’s much too busy discussing matters with the sages and preparing Finn to take the throne to give me one ounce of his attention. Plus, these are royal grounds. No one would ever be foolish enough to make an attempt on my life here. Now, don't evade the question.”
“Well then what of Frode, what if you were hurt on the way?” he prodded, earning a flat look from you. He sighed in defeat, “Alright, fine. If you insist on knowing, I came here purely on instinct. From the looks of it, you should've called on me before coming here alone.”
He glanced to the wall, which had been drawn on for years. This was the biggest piece you'd ever done, and what the picture held was concerning. He'd never seen such darkness and violence depicted in one of your drawings. He felt uncomfortable looking at it for too long.
“I haven't made complete sense of it,” you admitted, following his gaze. “It was all choppy, blurry. Barely comprehensible.”
He frowned, focusing his attention back on you, “You need to rest. You can figure it out tomorrow.”
But, sleep would never come. After Dainsleif escorted you back to the palace and bid you goodnight, the only thing you could do was toss and turn. The images you saw earlier plagued your mind, concerning you to the point where you couldn't close your eyes without seeing the jumbled mess of all of it.
By the time the moon’s position went from miðnætti to åtta– midnight to eight– you hadn't slept a wink. Instead of waiting for your handmaiden to help you get dressed, you got ready for the day by yourself and made your way to the Höggomur Quarters where Dainsleif resided.
You knew he'd give you an earful for not waiting, and for storming into the Black Serpent Knights wing as if you did it all the time. People would talk, and Halfdan would never let either of you hear the end of it.
Halfdan swore he was a romantic, and that he was perceptive when people had feelings for one another. But whatever he thought about you and Dainsleif, he could forget it. Even if Dainsleif did reciprocate your feelings, you were a princess and he was your guard. The sages would never approve of such a relationship, let alone your father. Halfdan thought the two of you were imbeciles– blind to how you felt about each other– and he couldn't fix stupid. However, he could push and prod.
Which is exactly what he went to do as soon as he saw you in the halls. But, you were dead set on finding Dainsleif as soon as possible. You'd been up all night, your mind running in circles as you tried to make sense of it all.
“Do not start,” you warned him, holding up a finger. “Where is he?”
Halfdan, who had a ghost of a cheeky smirk on his lips, gave you an amused chuckle in response, “He’s just now getting ready. Someone kept him up all night.”
Your mouth parted in shock, offended at what he was insinuating even though you both knew it wasn't true, “You mind your tongue, Sir Halfdan. Tell him to not keep me waiting or I will leave without him.”
“You think so poorly of me,” the man in question approached you, a small hint of a smile shining through his feigned annoyance. “Did you even get any rest?”
You pursed your lips before you evaded the question, “We need to get going.”
The slightly unamused look in his eye turned into one of irritation. Your disregard for your own self care was the bane of his existence, especially when you had yet to make sense of one of your sights. You were stubborn, you always had been. Once you set your mind to something, there was no changing it. It was something he both appreciated and hated about you.
With a facetious smile in his direction, you walked towards the exit of the headquarters. He was quick to follow, falling into step with you in no time. There was a comfortable silence that fell between you, the walk to Yggdrasil’s location taking less time than you thought.
As the two of you drew closer, an anxious pit set in your stomach. It grew with each step, the looming feeling of something dreadful pressing into your shoulders. It was almost as if he could tell, because the moment it almost became unbearable, he turned to look at you.
“The inteyvat fields will be ready soon,” he informed you, a light smile painting his lips. “I believe I promised to take you.”
Despite yourself and the turmoil you were fighting, you let out a small laugh, “I believe that you do, every year if I recall correctly.”
He remembered when he first became your guard. He was fresh out of training, eager to do his duty. As bright as a star– if not as bright as the moon. It was also the first time he'd seen you cry. That day had been sour from the minute you woke, aware that not only was it the day of your birth, it was the day of your mother's death. As a new life breathed air under the Yggdrasil tree, another was lost.
Even though you wished to be alone, he disregarded your words and refused to leave until you stopped crying. He had the idea to get your mind off things, a simple stroll that led you the furthest out of the kingdom that you had ever been. A place that your former guard refused to let you go. The Inteyvat fields in the heart of Pilos Path. He promised to bring you every year as a reminder that even though a flower had been plucked from the ground, it remained intact. Much like the memory of a soul who has departed from the world of the living will never be forgotten as long as there were those who remembered.
Every year you visited since, you often thought about entering Pilos Peak and seeing what was on the other side. Would it be everything you ever dreamed? Would the sun emit real warmth? Were the stars as bright as the stories told?
Neither one of you had seen real stars before. Because deep under the ground of Jarðríki– Teyvat– and between that of Óþekkturíki– Inteyvat– was a kingdom with a bare sky. No real stars, or a real sun. Just a real moon.
While above the surface offered another beautiful light moon and thousands of stars, according to the legends, it was all believed to be fake. You may never feel the warmth of the Teyvat's sun or the chill of the night, but you could always dream. You once told Dainsleif this dream. Whether it was to see the world above the surface, or the real moon below, you wanted to see the world. Khaenri'ah just so happened to lie perfectly between both Teyvat and Inteyvat.
While there was no direct path to Teyvat, there was a portion of Khaenri'ah that did not belong to the world. It leads further down, into a world that your people dared not explore. At least, not yet. Alchemists and researchers were working on perfecting their machines to make headway, and only the best of adventures and the royal guard would be sent in. Meaning one day you would have to say goodbye to Dainsleif, as he was the Rökkrinu Sverð– the Twilight Sword– the captain of the Black Serpent Knights.
Not knowing if you would ever see the man you considered your closest companion again one day also filled you with dread. But all the hard work he's done, all the time and effort he put in would be paying off, and you knew that you'd never be more proud of anyone when the time came. That was your reasoning for continuing your birthday tradition once you had stopped hating it– you never knew which birthday would be Dainsleif's last to spend with you.
Now, as the two of you came to a stop in front of the Yggdrasil tree, you wondered if that time was nigh. Your eyes scanned the markings you had left behind last night, seeing them more clearly under the moon’s light.
You thought there were pieces to a puzzle that wouldn't fit no matter how hard you tried. But, looking at it now, you could see where all the pieces lied. Your mind was no longer buzzing with confusion and was clear of the fog a sight always left you in, and it was much easier to work out the order of everything.
A stranger, someone new to the land who would bring a power that would not only cause war between Khaenri'ah and another nation, it would also lead to Khaenri'ah's downfall. Celestia would once again awaken, once again wipe out your people to keep you all silent. Afterall, the best way to keep a secret was to make sure the other party could never tell it. History would repeat, and your nation– your people– would be lost.
You swallowed thickly, turning to Dainsleif, “I must speak to Master Frode.”
“What is it?” He questioned, not missing the terrified look in your eye despite how well you tried to cover it. You could've fooled anyone else, but not him. “What did you see?”
Tears stung the back of your eyes as you forced yourself to look up at him. Concern was written in his expression, wildly searching your eyes for an answer that you were hesitant to give. You could never be clear with your answers. Not that you didn't want to, but you weren't physically capable of doing so. You had to pick all of your words wisely, and the words you chose as you grabbed his hand filled him with dread.
“Promise me,” your mouth ran dry as you choked back the tears threatening to spill over. “Dainsleif… promise me that you will hold my hand as the walls come tumbling down.”
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꒰ SUMMARY ! ꒱ to others, he was lee heeseung: musical prodigy, star of the basketball team, and golden boy of his college. to you, he was hee: your brother’s best friend, your safe place, and your first and final love.
pairing brother’s bsf!heeseung x fem!reader (ft. brother!jay) warning mention of violence, assault, profanity, blood and injury, not proofread word count 9.2k notes happy bday @bluriki! love u rora bb & hope you like my gift! ⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
THE FIRST TIME YOU MET LEE HEESEUNG, he was nineteen and you were seventeen.
School bag in hand and sweat on your forehead, you sighed in content as the coolness of the air conditioned home kissed your flushed skin. The summer heat was unforgiving, so no one could blame you when you rushed towards the freezer, throwing the door open in search of the precious stash of mango popsicles you saved for yourself as treats for enduring another tedious day at school. The last thing you expected was to find that there was none left.
In disbelief, you rummaged through the drawers, wondering if you misplaced them. But it soon came clear to you that this wasn’t an error on your part. There was no one else in this household who had the same appetite for ice cream as you did — and this time, you just knew he was to blame.
You slammed the door of the freezer shut, your mind made up as you stomped over to your brother’s room. Since he came home from college for summer break, he had been invading every bit of territory that you claimed as your own upon his departure from home. You didn’t even need to question when he had the opportunity to steal your precious ice cream. The evidence was all against him. So you didn’t hesitate to enact justice when you saw him.
“Hey!” you yelled at the top of your lungs. You twisted open his bedroom door, throwing it open with all the annoyance you could summon. “Park Jeongseong, you—!”
You froze mid sentence, eyes comically wide as they stared at the sight before you — one that wasn’t your brother. A person who could only be a character of a manhwa who had come to life. Had you been idealised without even realising? Because the stranger in front of you was far too pretty to be real.
Sitting in the halo of the sunlight that filtered through your brother’s window, the person before you cradled a guitar over his lap, slender fingers pausing in the middle of a gentle strum. Doe-like eyes met yours, giving him the appearance of a deer caught in the headlights. Still, with the framing of his soft hair against his forehead and the soft angles around his face, he didn’t look any less handsome in his surprised state. With his casual baggy t-shirt and jeans, he looked like the typical flower male leads of high school romance dramas.
“…Bastard…”
You swallowed thickly, eyes blinking rapidly at the unwilling words which left your mouth. The handsome stranger raised a perfect brow at the sudden name-call, and you felt your face flush. Somehow, even such a simple action seemed attractive when he did it.
“Sorry, not you!” you amended immediately. “I was just—!” You were about to explain yourself like a burglar who was caught in the middle of a heist, only to realise that wasn’t right at all: pretty or not, the person in front of you was a total stranger inside your home, in your brother’s room. You crossed your arms over your chest, standing your ground against the curious gaze of the intruder. “Wait a second— who are you? And why are you in my house?”
The intruder looked at you. You looked back. Then after a few seconds, he laughed. In your confusion, you failed to notice your older brother creep up behind you with an unimpressed look. “What are you doing in my room? I told you not to go in without knocking.”
You turned around to meet your older brother’s questioning gaze. By now, you had completely forgotten about the ice cream, instead focusing on the new mystery in front of you. “But!” You pointed to the stranger on your brother’s bed like a child pointing out a stray puppy to their mother. “There’s a random guy in your room!”
Jeongseong — or rather, “Jay,” as he liked to be called — followed the direction of your pointed finger, his gaze landed on the boy on his bed. Your brother let out a sigh. Like an adult dealing with a troublesome child, he looked down at you with a flat look. “That ‘random guy’,” Jay said, “is my best friend from college.”
Your eyes widened comically, a small ‘o’ forming on your lips. “You have friends?”
There was silence. Then, the emptiness was filled with the sound of rich laughter, and you felt your cheeks heat up at the warmth of the sound, your head turning to look at the source. Your brother’s so-called ‘best friend’ was smiling at you, his eyes dancing with mirth. Your brother rolled his eyes from behind you, unaware of the infatuated look in your eyes as you took in the sight before you.
“Heeseung, meet my little sister, [_____].” Jeongseong’s rough palm landed on the top of your head, forcing it down into a polite nod, and breaking your trance with the older male in front of you. You furrowed your brows and shook off the weight of his heavy hand, lifting your head to meet the eyes of this ‘Heeseung.’ “[_____], say hi.”
You timidly bowed your head, fidgeting slight under the amused gaze of the handsome boy in front of you.
He nodded at you, a soft smile on his face. “Nice to meet you, Little Park,” he said, his voice full of the gentleness one might have when speaking to a baby kitten. You could have sworn your heart skipped a beat. “I hope you don’t mind me hanging out in your home.”
You blinked, too startstruck to do anything else. And from that moment on, your world was never the same.
THE FIRST TIME YOU REALISED YOU MIGHT HAVE A LITTLE CRUSH ON LEE HEESEUNG, it was only a few days after meeting him.
Ever since you met Heeseung, he had been around the house more often, seeing as he had won over your parents as easily as he seemingly won over you — with his charms and smile, the couple instantly invited Heeseung to hang over at your home more often. And surprisingly enough, the boy instantly agreed.
You had always been shy around strangers. But at your age, within the walls of your school, someone as handsome as Lee Heeseung was rarer than a Shiny Pokémon. And while your own brother was considered good-looking by many people, including your friends, you had grown immune to his face from years of exposure to it and because of many embarrassing childhood memories of him attached to it. To you, Lee Heeseung was from a whole different world from your own. And that was why you couldn’t help but treat him differently than you did other boys you met.
You were skittish around him, avoiding him like a cat would water. You made sure you weren’t alone with him for too long out of fear that you might embarrass yourself with your awkwardness. On the other hand, he had always been the one to give you warm smiles out of kindness, greeting you whenever you somehow crossed paths. And you had to admit that it made you feel warm inside. But at the same time, having him around your house constantly was a little unnerving. Especially when he witnessed all the little moments that happened in your own home — even those you wished he wouldn’t have witnessed at all.
You had a test coming up for one of your classes which you had been struggling with, and in a last ditch effort to save your failing grade, you enlisted the help of your much more academically gifted older brother. You were sitting on the floor of your living room, your books and stationary scattered across the small coffee table, while your brother sat on the couch behind you, arms crossed over his chest and a ruler in his left hand, painting the image of an old-school teacher with Spartan teaching methods.
“Okay, so which formula do you use to solve this?”
You furrowed your eyebrows as you stared at the paper in front of you, trying to mentally flip through all the pages of formulas you had tried to cram in your head under your brother’s expectant gaze. You frowned when you could only remember the first few parts, completely unable to decipher the rest from the random jumble of letters and numbers that your brain came up with to fill your gaps in knowledge.
“Ouch!” You yelped when you suddenly felt the familiar feeling of the end of Jeongseong’s ruler lightly knocking your skull. You raised your hands defensively to plant on top of your head. Pouting, you turned around to glare at your brother. “What was that for?”
“I was giving your braincells a manual reboot,” he said plainly. “How hard is this? I already told you so many times how to do it.”
You huffed, your pride wounded as Jeongseong chided you. It would be fine if it was only you and your parents in the home to witness your lack of mental capacity for math. But as it happened, your brother’s best friend was pouring himself a drink in the kitchen, and happened to witness everything with front row seats.
“Seriously, how are you this dumb?” Jeongseong asked.
You drowned in embarrassment as you felt Heeseung’s eyes on the two of you. Even if he was your brother’s best friend, he was still essentially a stranger to you, and it was always more humiliating to be humbled in front of people you didn’t know. So for your brother to call you ‘dumb’ in front of him, you couldn’t help but feel wronged.
You glared at your bother. “You don’t have to be such a jerk about it,” you hissed under your breath, your hands balling into fists at your side. “I’m trying my best.”
Before Jay could ask what was wrong with you, you quickly stood from your seat, your hair falling over your eyes as they remained glued to the floor. And without another word, you stormed to your room. You slammed the door shut, ignoring the protests from your older brother. Flopping onto your bed, you buried your face into one of the plushies, your limbs laying limp by your side.
You thought about the way you left the scene and groaned. Now you probably looked weird and stupid at the same time. You reached over to your bedside subconsciously, and groaned again when you realised you hadn’t even brought your phone with you. Your laptop was still in the living room, as well, so you couldn’t carry out your plans to waste the day away in your room like you had planned.
Great. Just great.
Seems like you would just have to force yourself to take a nap instead. Closing your eyes, you willed yourself to fall asleep. But a knock at your door had them snapping open once more. Was it Jeongseong? What did he want right now?
Groaning, you dragged yourself off the bed. At the door, you readied yourself to give the meanest glare that you could possibly give, in case he tried to give you a hard time because of your attitude. But when you opened the door, you were surprised to find someone who wasn’t your brother.
“Hey, Little Park,” Heeseung greeted. Your eyes widened, and you felt your breath be caught inside your chest. Because why was Lee Heeseung currently in front of your room? “Sorry to bother you, I just came to bring these for you.”
Your eyes flitted down to the tray inside Heeseung’s hands that you didn’t notice upon seeing his face. It had a glass of juice on it, as well as a plate of fruit that he had cut. “This is for me?” you asked in surprise. “What’s it for?”
Heeseung chuckled warmly at your reaction. “Your brother asked me to bring it for you, since he knew you probably didn’t want to come out into the kitchen after…”
You lowered your head in shame at the reminder of how you suddenly stormed out the living room. “Please forget that happened… It’s embarassing.”
“Don’t be embarrassed,” Heeseung said gently. “Your brother did a lot more embarassing things in front of me. His mood swings were the worst during puberty.”
You laughed as you recalled memories of your older brother when he was fourteen. He had a bit of a temper, and got angered at the slightest inconveniences. One of his infamous grievances — or so you heard from your parents, when they came back from a parent-teacher interview for your brother — was when he gathered all the members of his football team in the locker rooms and gave them all a dressing-down for leaving their dirty towels scattered across the changing rooms.
Seeing your smile, Heeseung returned it with one of his own. He held out the tray in his hands, and you took it gratefully into your smaller ones, your fingers brushing slightly from the contact. You expected him to let go straight away, but to your surprise, he kept his hands there. You looked up at him questioningly.
“I know you probably wouldn’t want to hear this right now,” he said, “but your brother really cares for you.” He gestured to the fruit on the plate. “I know for a fact that whenever me and my older brother argued, he would never think to feed me afterwards.”
You lowered your head at Heeseung’s words. You knew this very well, in fact. Your brother was the person who cared about your most on this world, aside from your parents. Your mother often told the tales of how your brother had refused to leave your side when you were younger, insisting on sleeping in your room with you in case you got lonely. And then when your parents woke up to check on you when you started crying in the middle of the night, by the time they made it to the room, your brother was already by your side, gently patting you back to sleep.
Even when the two of you bickered, you knew you were fortunate to have a brother like Jeongseong.
“I know,” you told Heeseung, your head lowered.
Heeseung chuckled. And a second later, you found yourself freezing when you felt his palm on the top of your head. “Hey,” he said, meeting your surprised gaze with a smile. “Don’t feel bad.” He gave your head a gentle pat, chuckling awkwardly when you seemed even more confused. “Sorry. I don’t know why I did that.”
The two of you laughed together, and the earlier gloom above your head was chased away by the brightness of his smile.
“I should probably go back to study,” you said, suddenly feeling invigorated.
Heeseung hummed. “How about I help you?” Upon seeing your surprised expression, he smiled warmly. “I have the free time, and your brother is still moping in his room. So we can go over some of the things you’re struggling with.”
You eagerly accepted the older boy’s offer, and the two of you sat down at the coffee table, knees brushing against each other, and your heads bumping slightly as you hunched over your school work.
You looked up at one point, after a particularly problematic equation, discretely watching Heeseung as he scanned your working. At this angle, you could admire the length of his eyelashes and the perfect outline of his side profile, and the way his chocolate brown irises appeared like caramel in the lighting. You almost flinched when those eyes of his met yours. And then he smiled at you, his hand reaching up to the top of your head once more.
“Good job, Little Park,” he said warmly. And you couldn’t help but beam under his praise. “You should take a break, though. It’s been a while.”
You didn’t refuse. After all, you would much rather not do any more equations. You worried it may be awkward between you and Heeseung, though, seeing as you’ve never had a proper conversation before today. But soon, the living room was filled with your voices as you discussed topic after topic.
“So you have an older brother, right?” you asked, remembering how he mentioned it earlier. “Do you get along?”
Heeseung hummed, and you couldn’t help but note the smooth but low register of his voice when he was relaxed. “We get along like all brothers do — but I’d say you and Jay seem to be closer than we are.” Heeseung smiled as he observed your facial features. “You’re really similar, too. Me and my brother never had a lot of shared interests.”
You tilted your head curiously. “How so?”
Heeseung leaned back onto the sofa behind the two of you, looking up at the ceiling, and giving you a nice view of his Adam’s Apple. “He was always more studious. Top student and everything. I liked music and basketball better — and apparently I’m pretty good at it.”
“Really? That’s cool!” Music and basketball was an interesting combination. But It made sense, too, considering Heeseung’s physique: Heeseung was much taller than average, and even your brother was quite a bit shorter than him; his fingers were long and slender as well, and probably skilful with the piano — though you, of course, wouldn’t say that out loud. “So you’re good at basketball? I can see it,” you said, nodding sagely. “You have the height for it.”
Heeseung chuckled. “I think I’ve heard that one before.”
The more you spoke to Heeseung, the easier for you to let down your guard. While your first impression was someone out of reach, you realised he was actually very comfortable to be around. “By the way,” you said, looking up at Heeseung, “do you have a girlfriend?”
Heeseung blinked, obviously surprised. “Why do you ask?”
“I mean…” You shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant. You couldn’t let him know you wanted to see if he was available — especially since you only just met. “Most guys your age have girlfriends, right?”
“Your brother doesn’t, though,” Heeseung pointed out.
You nodded. “Well, that’s because my brother is terrible at flirting with girls. So it makes sense.”
Heeseung raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “So what about me, then?” The corner of his lips tugged into a smirk. “If you think I have a girlfriend, are you saying I’m good at flirting?”
You blinked, not expecting that sort of question to come from him. You awkwardly avoided his eyes, humming uncertainty. “Well… I mean— you probably wouldn’t be bad at it… Right?”
Heeseung paused. Then, he laughed, the sound so full and resonant it caused your heart to beat wildly in return. “Well, I’m flattered,” he said while looking at you with amusement. He leaned towards you, his voice and smirk holding a teasing lilt. “But just so you know — I’m single.”
You didn’t realise it then, but that fluttering feeling inside your chest when you made eye contact was the beginning of your first and only love.
THE FIRST TIME YOU REALISED THAT LEE HEESEUNG REALLY CARED ABOUT YOU, he was twenty and you were eighteen.
A year had passed since you met Lee Heeseung in your brother’s room, and since then, you could say that — whenever he was on break from college — the older boy had become something of a constant in your life from there on. Every day, when you came home from school, he would be there with a cup of juice for you to fend off the heat. And when winter came, the juice would be replaced with hot chocolate. And one the first day you saw each other during his seasonal breaks, he would have a gift for you.
The first time it happened, you hadn’t been suspecting it. But as soon as Heeseung laid eyes on you when he walked through the front door of your house, he had immediately gestured you over to him. You, being the lovesick puppy you were, immediately bounded up to him. And your eyes lit up when he held out his hand with a keychain of your favourite Sanrio character.
“Here,” he said to you, in that same gentle tone he always did. “I got this for you. I saw it at a gift store and thought you would like it.”
Jeongseong gave him an ugly look. “Where’s my present?”
Heeseung walked past him. “It’s me.”
Your brother, having his delicate feelings offended, immediately pounced on his friend in retaliation. Their laughter bounced off the walls of your home. And as the two tall males brawled playfully in front of the entrance to your home, you simply stared at the keychain in your hand with a smile, before clutching it close to your heart.
It had become routine, and it had gotten to the point where you had been used to his presence. So, whenever your brother was home, but you didn’t see Heeseung’s face, you pestered Jeongseong about it.
“Where’s Hee?” you asked one day, as you returned home from school, only to find the familiar head of ashy silver hair was no where to be seen.
Your brother gave you a narrow stare, and you briefly wondered if he had caught onto your little puppy crush on his best friend, and had consequently chased Heeseung out of his home in his typical overprotective fashion. But instead, he turned back to his show on the television, brushing your question off with a dismissive explanation.
“He’s busy,” Jeongseong said.
You frowned at the news.
“Did you ask about if he was coming to my graduation?” you asked your brother. It was your final year in high school, and in a week’s time, you would be graduating. Since Heeseung had grown close to your family, you thought that perhaps he might come. But your brother nipped that thought in the bud.
Jeongseong turned around and gave you a strange look. “Why would he?”
You paused. That was a good question: why would Lee Heeseung attend your graduation? Even if it was a milestone in your life, were the two of you really close enough that he needed to be there to share it?
“Ah,” you said, disappointed. “Never mind…”
You knew it was foolish of you to be upset about this. After all, he didn’t have an obligation to be there. The two of you wouldn’t even know each other if it weren’t for your older brother. It was childish of you to assume he would be there, as if you really meant anything to him — as if you weren’t just someone he treated well for the sake of being related to a good friend of his.
Besides, he was busy. What right did you have to demand his time?
You dragged your feet as you went towards you room, phantom puppy ears flattening against your head. As if sensing the sulking aura from you, Jeongseong let out a heavy sigh and said, “Bring your phone.”
Your head whipped towards your brother in shock. “What?”
“If you want to ask him to go to your graduation, then you ask him yourself.” Jeongseong looked at over form over the couch, holding his hand out to you. “I’ll give you his number.”
You rushed to hand your phone over to your brother like he had offered you a pot of gold. You weren’t sure why your brother was offering you his best friend’s number, but you didn’t question it. Heeseung was the only friend of his he ever allowed near his home — so it went to show that your brother didn’t mind if he was around you. You just had to make sure you weren’t obvious. So after Jeongseong had typed Heeseung’s number, you feigned calmness as you thanked him and went to your room.
But the second you closed the door behind you, you jumped onto your bed while kicking your feet giddily. After saving his contact under your nickname for me — accompanied by a hamster emoji — you quickly sent a text his way, letting him know that your brother gave him your number. It didn’t take long before you received a reply.
Hee 🐹: thanks for letting me know
Hee 🐹: i’ll save your number
You smiled as you sent another text.
You: sorry to bother you btw
You: i just wanted to ask if you were free next friday
Hee 🐹: next friday??
Hee 🐹: sorry little park but i’m busy on that day
Hee 🐹: why do you ask?
You frowned at the reply. Of course. Your brother had told you he was busy, so you shouldn’t have been disappointed. But a small part of you — the naive part — was hoping that, by some twist of fate, he would be free to celebrate what was a special day in your life. Biting your lip, you sent back a solemn reply.
You: no, it’s nothing
You: just asking
You quickly changed the topic, not wanting to alarm the boy. Knowing him, he would feel guilty if he knew he was missing out on your graduation: he was just kind like that. Always wanting to be there for everyone, always wanting to make everyone happy. You supposed it was selfish to want to keep him to yourself.
You: are you okay?
You genuinely didn’t want him to be overworking himself, so you had to make sure.
Hee 🐹: i’m fine don’t worry about me
Hee 🐹: i’ve been working at a music store lately to earn some money
You tilted your head. You knew Heeseung was talented when it came to music, but you didn’t know he worked at a music store. His parents were well off much like yours and Jeongseong’s, so he didn’t need to worry about funds — just like you and Jeongseong were told by your parents to simply focus on studying rather than getting jobs before you graduated. But it was admirable seeing Heeseung be independent, regardless.
Smiling, you sent back a text of your own.
You: oooh i didn’t know that you had a job!
You: congrats! 🥳
You: hope i’m not bothering you
Your heart skipped a beat at the next text.
Hee 🐹: you could never be a bother to me
You didn’t realise how much Heeseung meant that until a week later, after you had walked off the stage with your graduation certificate.
Your cheeks had hurt from smiling so much, your graduation certificate held carefully in your arms. Being able to celebrate it with your family and school friends you spent years with made the lack of Heeseung’s presence feel a little less empty. So you, were content with what you had, and didn’t dare ask for more.
After taking photos with your friends, you stuck by your family the entire time, until your brother had excused himself for a second to answer a call.
“Hey, are you here yet?” Jeongseong asked on the phone, making his way away from you and your parents. You didn’t pay attention to what he might be saying, too focused on posing for more pictures as a photographer your parents hired snapped away on their camera.
Time passed since your brother had left, and you didn’t know when he came back, but when he ran back towards you and your parents, he promptly apologised by saying, “I had to go pick something up.”
You furrowed your eyebrows. “Pick up what?”
A tap on your shoulder caught you off guard, and you whipped your head around to face the perpetrator. You hadn’t expected to come face to face with the person you had been missing tonight. You gasped and broke away from Heeseung in shock, a hand flying to your mouth. He simply chuckled at your expression, eyes crinkling and sparkling with mirth. “Happy graduation, Little Park.”
“Hee!” you exclaimed excitedly, and you jumped on him, almost tackling him to the ground. You giggled with glee as he returned your embrace, his arms wrapping around you gently, and a hand coming up to the back of your head, cradling it to his chest. Your parents chuckled on the background, and your brother sighed. You pulled back, eyes full of wonder as you looked up at your crush. “But didn’t you say you were busy? I mean, you had work, right?”
Heeseung smiled. “I couldn’t miss your graduation, could I?” He then pouted at you. “I’m a bit disappointed that you didn’t mention it, though.” You sheepishly lowered your head, and he chuckled before patting your head. “Don’t worry. That’s what your brother is for. If there’s one thing he’s good at, it’s telling people all about your business.”
“Hey!” Jeongseong protested at having been exposed for his habit of bringing you up any chance he got. You blinked in surprise, not expecting that side of him. But as if he didn’t like the way your attention drifted from him, Heeseung cleared his throat.
You immediately looked at him. And then, as if he didn’t surprise you enough already, he suddenly pulled a bouquet out from behind his back — one that had to be bigger than the size of your head, but which happened to have all your favourite flowers.
All of a sudden, you remembered a conversation the two of you had, a few days ago on the phone.
“Can you help me with something?” Heeseung asked on the phone. You, of course, eagerly agreed, and he explained his situation. “I want to buy my brother’s girlfriend some flowers to welcome her into the family, but I don’t know which ones a girl would like. Can you give me some ideas?”
You “ooh”ed in understanding, racking your brain for some common flowers. Secretly, your heart fluttered at the thought that — of all people, and of all the girls he most likely knew — you were the first person Heeseung came to for help. You definitely didn’t want to mess this up.
“It depends, though. Everyone is different,” you replied.
There was a slight pause on the other side of the line, and you were scared that you had disappointed Heeseung. But instead, he simply hummed, and made an ‘ah’ sound out of realisation. “Then why don’t you tell me what flowers you like?” he suggested. “If I got you a bouquet, what would you want in it?”
You scolded yourself for immediately picturing Heeseung in a suit, holding a bouquet of your favourite flowers as he gave you that same warm smile that he always did. Shaking your head, you immediately started to name the ones that you preferred.
You didn’t think the information you gave him would end up being used like this. With a wide grin, you accepted the flowers, your eyes sparkling like the night sky as you looked at the boy in front of you — not in a suit, like you had imagined, but handsome all the same. He always was, after all.
“Thank you, Hee,” you said, full of genuine gratitude.
He smiled at you. “Anything for you,” he said.
And now, you knew he meant it.
THE FIRST TIME YOU SAW LEE HEESEUNG ANGRY, you didn’t even know he was capable of it.
You had always been used to a warm Heeseung. The Heeseung who teased you with smirks, and simultaneously doted on you with kind smiles. But you didn’t realise that he had a side to him that was fierce, just as he was gentle. That even his blood was capable of boiling if someone pushed him far enough.
Having graduated from high school, and awaiting news from college applications, you spent your free time working part-time at a local convenience store, which happened to be fairly close to the music store Heeseung worked at. You worked day shifts, so you never worried for your safety. But one particular day, you got unlucky.
“How’s work going?” Heeseung had asked through your AirPods. He was on break, while you were simply waiting for customers to show up. At this time, you guys usually had phone calls to pass the time, and you would stack shelves with your earphones in, listening to Heeseung’s voice as he talked about his day and you told him about yours. It was one of the things you liked most about working at the convenience store — apart from the endless supply of nearly expired snacks you were allowed to eat for free.
“It’s going okay,” you replied. “Really empty, though.”
You weren’t surprised. Since it was winter, most people opted to stay inside to keep away from the cold. At most, you would have the nine-to-five workers who popped in from the office buildings across the convenience store during lunch hours. But it was already going on to four in the afternoon, so the buzz had already long died down by now.
At that moment, the door opened to signal the arrival of another customer. “Welcome,” you greeted politely, going over to the counter to get out of the way and wait for the customer to make a purchase. Heeseung didn’t say anything, allowing you to focus on your job. And it was then that you realised something was wrong.
The customer who had just walked in was stumbling over their own feet, an empty soju bottle in one hand, the other wiping his mouth after taking a swig. He was an average-looking man, middle-aged, with beady eyes and a strong stench of alcohol surrounding him. You subconsciously moved closer to the emergency button when he stumbled into one of the shelves, cursing loudly when a bunch of items fell to the floor with a clatter.
Heeseung, of course, had heard this, and instantly questioned you.
“Little Park,” he said, his voice uncharacteristically tense. “What was that?”
You blinked, watching as the customer aggressively ripped a few soju bottles from the fridge, causing others to fall on the floor. The sound of shattering glass immediately followed, and you flinched. “Sir,” you called out shakily, scared that you might set him off. “If you break items, you have to pay for it.”
“Fucking hell, just shut up already!” You flinched at the customer’s raised voice. You thought you were overreacting, so you didn’t alarm Heeseung when his voice once again rang in your ear.
“I’m being serious right now,” Heeseung said. “Are you okay?”No, went unsaid. But you didn’t need to say it, because there was already a loud shuffling on the other side of the line, followed by the sound of a door being swung open. Heeseung didn’t even let you protest as you heard the sound of him running down the concrete pathway. “I’m on my way, just stay on call.”
“Huh?” You glanced at the time on your watch. His break would finish in five minutes, he really didn’t have time to be running out on your account. “But your break—!”
“Hey.” You froze upon being addressed by the man, who had suddenly appeared in front of you. And even if there was a protective screen in front of you, you couldn’t help but feel threatening as he glared at you, aggressively placing his bottles on the counter. “Who are you talking to?”
You furrowed your brows. Why was it any of his business? “Are these all you’re buying?” You asked, ignoring his question and gesturing the the alcohol bottle. You then looked at the mess he made near the fridge. Since you weren’t going to risk stepping outside the booth, where he would be able to reach you, you did your best to assess the damage from where you stood. “I see three broken bottles, so that will be added to your total.”
You reached out cautiously to grab the bottles on the counter for scanning, wanting him out of the store as soon as possible. But just as you tried to grab them, you let out a scream when the man suddenly grabbed your arm, holding your wrist like a viper trying to cut off circulation.
“You little bitch!” he cursed. “You tried calling the police, didn’t you? Just like that woman!”
“Help!” You ignored the man’s rambling. But that seemed to only make things worse. He lunged at the screen between the two of you, nails reaching for your face. You let out another scream, your eyes stinging with tears as you tried in vain to free your hand. You somehow had the sense to press the merges services button under the counter, but who knew when they would get here. “Help! Is anyone there?!”
At that moment, as if the world had answered your prayers, the door to the convince store opened. And there stood Heeseung, chest heaving, his phone clutched in his hand. Upon seeing the sight in front of him, his eyes flashed with rage beyond words, his phone falling to the floor as he marched up to the man holding your wrist captive.
He grabbed the back of his collar before ripping his form away from the counter with strength you didn’t he possessed. You watched with wide eyes as Heeseung threw him to the ground, straddling him before throwing an unforgiving fist to the man’s face. The sound of flesh and cracking bones rang out as Heeseung levelled the man relentlessly in silent rampage, not once letting a single curse slip.
You watched as Heeseung’s knuckles became bloodied, busted and bruised. And seeing him like that, you finally snapped out of your frightened daze.
“Hee!” You yelled, scrambling from behind the counter. As if you placed a spell on him, Heeseung immediately stopped, his fist pausing mid-punch. You immediately wrapped your arms around his torso, tears flooding your vision as you squeezed him as tightly as you could. “Hee, stop!”
You didn’t care for the man who tried to attack you. But you could never forgive yourself if Heeseung got into trouble because of you.
“I’m okay,” you assured him. “I’m okay…”
Heeseung let his fist fall to his side, and he sighed as he looked at the unconscious man beneath him, whose face was beaten beyond recognition. By the time the police arrived at the scene, the only thing they found was the man on the floor of the convenience store, while you and Heeseung stood to the side, the latter hold you in his arms as he stroked your head and whispered gentle words into your ears.
“It’s okay,” he said, his lips against the shell of your ear as your body trembled from the shock of the events that just unfolded. He closed his eyes, burying his nose into your hair while you sobbed into his shoulder. “I won’t let anyone hurt you…”
That day, you realised just how unforgiving Heesung was. And yet, as he held you in his arms, you felt nothing but comfort. Even then — especially then — he was warm, gentle. He was safe.
“That bastard got lucky,” Jeongseong said as he picked you and Heeseung up front the police station, where you were required to give your own statements of what happened. Your older brother gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles went white. As soon as he heard the news of what happened, he was ready to send the person responsible for the bruise on your wrist to an early grave. And if it weren’t for the police present, holding him back when he stormed into the station, you were sure he would have. “If Heeseung hadn’t gotten to him first… I would have seriously killed him.”
Heeseung reached over from the backseat to pat your head as you zoned out in the passenger seat. You rubbed your arms for warmth, and the scent of Heeseung’s hoodie on your figure caused you to drift off to sleep while your brother ranted his frustration in the driver’s seat beside you.
And you just prayed for anyone else who ever raised a hand against you in the future. Because you knew you weren’t leaving Heeseung’s side any time soon.
THE FIRST TIME YOU KISSED LEE HEESEUNG, it was just a few months later.
It was your first day of college, and you had been nervous as you moved into your new accommodation on campus. Your parents were even more so, and you had a tearful goodbye. But as soon as they left, your brother and Heeseung — who coincidentally went to the same institution that you would now attend — stayed behind to help you move your furniture in.
“That’s all of it,” Heeseung said as he dusted off his hands. He smiled at you, before wiping sweat from his forehead. And you shamelessly watched the way his skin shone under the sunlight filtering through your window. “You’re good to go, Little Park.”
You smiled. Although he didn’t seem too different, you could tell you had somehow gotten closer to him after the convenience store incident. And ever since then, his presence had always been a source of security for you. You didn’t worry when he was around.
“Remember what I said, okay?” Jay asked. He was in typical overprotective brother mode as he lectured you on what you could or couldn’t do, and it gave you flashbacks to your first day of middle schools, where he had threatened off a little boy for gifting you a flower. Hopefully, he wouldn’t be getting into any fights this time around — but who knew? He had an unpredictable temper at times. “Be careful of boys!” Jeongseong warned passionately. “You can’t trust any of them, no matter how nice they look?”
You raised a brow. “But what about you and Hee?”
Jeongseong waved a dismissive hand. “Obviously, I’m your brother, so I don’t count. And Hee basically sees you as his little sister with how long he’s known you, so he doesn’t count, either.”
You froze. And all of a sudden, it was like a cloud of doom gathered over your head, threatening to drench you in your own self-pity. You would be lying if you said you didn’t have the fattest crush on him — and you had been trying to delude yourself into thinking he might feel the same one day.
But when Jeongseong raised a point, it was often a very good one. Heeseung had essentially spent two years in and out of your home, making it a second home of his own, and was as close as brothers with Jeongseong. He was a ‘safe’ man in Jeongseong’s eyes — because the way your brother saw it, there was no way Heeseung could hold any romantic feelings for you.
And you hated to admit that he might be right.
You glanced hesitantly over at Heeseung to find that he had a clenched jaw, his posture tense as he stared straight forward. You bit your lip, lowering your head. Now that you thought about it… Everything he did for you— was that just an act of brotherly affection? Did he really not see you as anything else?
“Anyway, we should head off,” Jeongseong said. “Have fun, and don’t forget to call if you need anything!”
With that, Jeongseong turned and opened your door, ready to leave. But at that moment, he noticed Heeseung was still standing where he was — unmoving. “Hey, man,” Jeongseong called out to him, “you okay there?”
You looked at him curiously, wondering the same thing. As if snapping out of a trance, Heeseung shook his head. “No. I’m fine. Let’s go.” He turned to follow Jeongseong out the door, but paused for a moment to look at you. You spared a small smile, hoping to give off some semblance of normalcy. But to your disappointment, he simply averted your gaze and turned away.
He left without looking back, leaving you wondering what you had done wrong.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” You looked at your friend, who you had met on Orientation Day, and who you hit it off with immediately. Kim Sunoo was the same age as you and coincidentally from the same degree. So, the two of you quickly stuck together like glue. “You seemed out of it since we met up.”
You quickly shook your head, not wanting to bring down the mood. Even though Sunoo knew about your feelings for Heeseung (you couldn’t resist telling him, when he seemed invested in your story), you didn’t really want to think about his strange behaviour. This was a day out for the two of you to enjoy. Remembering this, you smiled. “It’s nothing!” you assured. “Just missing home.”
Sunoo, thankfully, bought the lie (mostly because it was actually true), nodding sympathetically. “I get it. I miss my family a lot, even if it’s only been a day.” After a moment, he then made a noise like he remembered something. “By the way— if you’re not too tired, there’s a party at the dorms tonight. Some seniors that I know are holding it for us first years. Wanna come?”
Your eyes widened. “Really?” You hadn’t been invited to parties much in high school, because everyone knew you were related to Park “Overprotective” Jeongseong. Besides, your parents would have never allowed it. But now, you were slowly realising how much freedom you had as an adult. Just once, you felt like experiencing this part of your youth you never got to taste. “Sure.”
Hopefully, if nothing else, the party would be a nice distraction…
“You know Lee Heeseung?”
Or not.
Upon arriving at the venue where the supposed party was being held (which happened to be in the common rooms, meaning a relatively short walk), Sunoo had immediately dragged you over to a group of older girls, who were all either second or third years. You chatted with them awkwardly until they brought up the name all too familiar with you, fawning over his good looks. And Sunoo, who sensed the sudden spark of jealousy in your eyes, had been quick to subtly stake your claim on him.
Not that he needed to, considering Heeseung wasn’t yours…
“He’s my brother’s best friend,” you explained. Though you wished you kept your mouth shut, after seeing the glint of excitement in the senior’s eye. “Why?”
One of the other seniors grasped your hands. “Then do you think you can introduce me to him? He’s totally my type!”
You frowned.
“Oh, I forgot I was supposed to meet with some other friends,” Sunoo suddenly said. He then turned to you, grabbing your wrist out of the senior’s hands. “Come on, [_____]. They said they wanted to meet you, too.” With one last half-assed apology, Sunoo dragged you away from the seniors. He glanced at you, frowning at your vacant expression. “Sorry about them.”
You shook your head. “No. It’s okay…”
You supposed you should have seen this coming. Who wouldn’t want to be close to Lee Heeseung? It was only natural. But deep inside, you couldn’t help but wonder, if there was someone — someone like those pretty seniors you were with — who Heeseung wanted to be close to. After all, you knew he was single, but that didn’t mean his heart wasn’t taken. So who? Who was it?
“Little Park?”
You immediately froze in your tracks, causing Sunoo to pause right beside you. That nickname… Only one person ever used it. And there was no mistaking that voice. You immediately turned around, as your body was driven by some subconscious reaction to respond to him. Your eyes widened when you met gazes with Heeseung.
And he did not seem happy.
Heeseung’s eyebrows furrowed as his eyes landed on Sunoo’s hand on your wrist. His hand clenched in a fist by his side, and his jaw was clenched. He was as gorgeous as always, with his silver hair shining under the dim lighting of the common room, creating a nice contrast with the black shirt that clung to his form, moulding itself perfectly over his muscles. But the thing you noticed first was not the glare in his eyes, or his beauty.
It was the busted lip he was sporting, and the purple bruise on his cheek.
Your eyes widened, a gasp slipping past your lips. You didn’t know when Sunoo had dropped your wrist, but you didn’t care in that moment. You immediately ran to Heeseung, eyes trained on the injuries on his face. “Hee!” you gasped out, raising your hand to his face, your fingers hovering over his injury. “What happened to you? Your face…”
Heeseung looked down at you, sparing a weak smile, all his precious displeasure fading from his face. “Don’t worry.” He lifted his hand to grab your own, eyes holding the same light it always did when he spoke to you. “I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not!” You said. And it was probably the first time you ever raised your voice against him. But he simply grinned even wider, despite the pain he must feel from the cut on his lip. “Come on, we’re going to get your wound treated!” You turned around, facing Sunoo who was watching the two of you with raised eyebrows. “Sorry, but we have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
Sunoo barely got to say goodbye before you were bounding up the stairs. You pulled Heeseung behind you and he followed you like a lost puppy as you navigated your way up the stairs, towards your room at the end of the hallways. You threw the door open, making Heeseung sit on the bed as you looked around at your unpacked boxes.
“Where did I put my First Aid Kit?”
You went to reach for one of the boxes, only to be stopped by Heeseung’s hands on your own. “Hold up, Hee,” you said absently, not looking at his face. “Let me just—”
“[____].”
You froze at the sound of Heeseung’s voice calling you by name — your actual name. Not ‘Little Park’, the name that ensured he only looked at you as an extension of his friendship with your brother, but your name. Just you. You slowly turned around, wonderstruck at how the sound of your name on his tongue was both unfamiliar but right.
Heeseung smiled at you, and you thought at that moment that the look in his eyes tonight were the most beautiful things you’d ever seen. “Just stop for a moment, okay?”
Before you could say another word, Heeseung was pulling you towards him, so that you were standing between his legs. Your eyes widened, and your breath hitched in your throat. His nose brushed against yours as he looked up at you, eyelids hooded as his chocolate orbs stared into yours, looking as if he was trapped in some daze. You swallowed the lump in your throat as you looked at the bruise on your cheek.
“But your wounds,” you whispered, worry causing your lips to tug downwards in a frown, despite the way your soul sang at your proximity.
“I deserve them,” Heeseung whispered in return. “If I were Jay, I would beat me up, too.”
You froze, your blood going ice cold. “My brother did this to you?”
Your brother — Heeseung’s best friend — Jeongseong was the one responsible for the injuries on Heeseung’s face? Just what had happened in the few hours that you didn’t see the two of them? What was severe enough to warrant punches between all-but-blood brothers?
“I let him,” Heeseung said. “I said something I knew would piss him off, and gave him a free shot at me.” Heeseung laughed, as if recalling some fond memory. “He always did like bargain deals…”
You stared at Heeseung, dumbfounded. “What did you say to my brother that was bad enough to earn you this?”
Heeseung stared at you in silence. You stared back. The room was filled with a heavy tension as Heeseung’s eyes flickered down to your parted lips, his fingers curling into your waist. After what felt like an eternity, his eyes wandered up to yours.
“I told him that I liked his sister.”
You gasped silently, your eyes widening comically at Heeseung’s words. What did you even say to them? It was funny how you had been chasing after him for so long, and yet never imagined what might happen given the possibility that Lee Heeseung would feel the same way for you. And now that it was happening, you were helpless to react, your throat closing up and swallowing your words.
Then you remembered his strange reaction to Jeongseong’s words this morning, and if all made sense. “So this morning… You weren’t mad at me?
Heeseung smiled seeing your reaction. “I could never be mad at you,” he said, thumbs caressing your sides. “I’m sorry if it seemed that way… I was more frustrated with myself.” You gave him a questioning look. “I just knew I couldn’t keep hiding from the truth any longer: Your brother is smart, but he was wrong this time. He said I didn’t like you — but I do. I have for a while now.”
You didn’t even know what to say. If this was even real, or if you would wake up in your bed any second now with a hangover and the taste of vomit on your tongue. But all you knew right then and there was that you didn’t care if this was a dream or not. All you could think about was the you from two years ago, who had fallen for this man for the first time because she had looked into his eyes just like you were doing now.
“And what did my brother say after he punched you?” you asked breathlessly, your heart wrenching now that you knew just exactly why Heeseung was in the state he was.
Heeseung gave you that smile of his. The same one from when you meet. The same one you fell for. The same one you dreamt about every day since.
“He made me promise to love you like my life depended on it,” Heeseung replied. “And that’s exactly what I did.”
You don’t know who moved first. But within a split second, your lips met Heeseung, and a sharp hiss was ripped from his throat from the pressure on the cut on his lips. But before you could even think about pulling away, his hand found the nape of your neck, melding your lips further into his own.
Heeseung stole your kisses like it was breathing in air. You let him take them the same way he took your heart.
“I like you,” you whispered as you pulled away from him. “I like you so much.”
When the two of you fully parted form each other, you looked into Heeseung’s eyes to see an unfamiliar fire in them. “Before I ask you to be mine, I just have one question.” Heeseung smirked coolly as you swallowed nervously under his gaze. “About the guy you were with earlier…”
You blinked, surprised. “Sunoo? What about him?”
“You’re not a thing, are you?”
You raised your eyebrows, taking in Heeseung’s expression. The green in his eyes, and the distaste in his tone. You burst out into laughter upon seeing his jealousy shine through for the first time since meeting him, a warm feeling settling over your chest.
“I’m flattered you think every man I come across is interested in me…” you leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. “But just so you know — I’m single.”
Heeseung smiled softly, a distant memory of the past flashing through his mind. “Not anymore,” he claimed, before his lips found yours again.
You smiled into the kiss, too starstruck to do anything else.
All of a sudden, it was like you were seventeen again, and he was nineteen, playing guitar in your brother’s room. And just like then, you knew, your world was never going to be the same. With Lee Heeseung by your side, it could only be better.
✉️ PS 노트 ! this fic inspired by the drama ‘hidden love’ and the novel ‘secretly, secretly, but unable to hide it’. the pretty dividers with the bows are by @/v6que, but the header was made by me!
boyfriend texts.
엔하이픈 니키 ୨୧ idol !female reader social media fluff established relationship + cw. mention of kissing mention of skinship no stated timestamps ( other )
was supposed to post this after his aotm but i already know he did great ! >0<
WITH ONE FINAL STATEMENT, YOU WERE HIS
Zhongli x Fem!Reader 4.7K words Content Warning: Implied Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Platonic!Guizhong & Morax, Xiao lmao, Mentions of the Archon war, Mute Traveler, Reader has an Adeptus name, My horrible gramma
Summary(?): So, I decided to make an alt genshin account and through inspiration of the Liyue archon quest- this takes place during the rite of parting, in which Zhongli sends the traveler to collect the Cleansing Bell from an old friend. And Soon relives his memory with said old friend.
Further: I gave more lore to the cleansing bell, I couldn't find much information about it in game but if anything is wrong or not culturally correct, let me know and Im more then happy to change it. For purposes I'll be using Aether as a placeholder for the traveler.
Zhongli, up until this point, had been quite hands on with the ongoing preparation of the upcoming Rite of Parting, its the reason why both Aether and Paimon had been so taken aback by the mans sudden hesitance to continue with the proceedings.
Instead of approaching head on and indulging a bargain before realizing he'd forgotten his mora once again- as he'd done before, this time, Zhongli had sent the two on their way to meet with what he'd proclaimed to be 'an old friend', alone.
A Bell, he'd mentioned- they were meant to be collecting a bell, a bell that for some reason required a trip all the way to the Wangshu inn.
Paimon had been quick to mention her suspicions to Aether on their travels there, that she really thought Mr. Zhongli just wasn't willing to make the trip.
But on arrival at the inn, and in meeting with said person, that suspicion was quickly thrown out the window, in which a new theory was set in place. Zhongli was undoubtedly terrified of this woman.
A beaming yet soothing laugh sounded the balcony of the inn as the information was relayed to the unknown woman, your eyes alight with mischief at the duos words and it was slowly becoming clearer why Zhongli was so weary to meet with you.
“Oh so it was Zhongli who sent you, hm? He’s quite the bossy one isn't he.” Your expression fluttered with a glint of something quite fond, and then to one of humor. You were definitely someone to be reckoned with, that was clear from your embellished outfit to your stunning features and well tended hair. It wasn't until Aether had glanced down to the vision attached to your clothes that he found himself ogling a little.
"Well, by the mention of his name, I'd guess it was about time I was to give up my possession of the cleansing bell." Your expression seemed to drop just slightly, a saddened yet longingly content gaze capturing your face. "I assume thats what you're here for?"
Aether's head nodded as the words left your mouth, to which you found yourself sighing. The sound was bittersweet but quickly swept away by the soft wind that brushed against the 3rd floor of the inn. It seemed the wind mourned with you too.
"This bell hold's great significance to the development of Liyue. I think more importantly It holds great significance to me." You seemed to suddenly be lost in the memory of your experiences, eyes boring straight through the traveller and his companion as you spoke. "Were you aware that this bell has been through countless generations? No? This little piece of metal has seen the prospects of war and felt the elation of peace more then any other person in Liyue has. Its older then the building we stand on."
"Wow, is everyone in Liyue as oddly knowledgeable as Zhongli and yourself? You both seem to love talking about the history of Liyue.” Paimon suddenly interjected.
“Knowledgeable is one way of putting it. I guess i just take interest in the historical arts.” Your tone had once again shifted, this time taking on the mischievous ring it held before. Aether once again shifted his eyes to his traveling companion, who seemed as equally taken aback by the lady before them. You were a roller coaster of topics and Paimon was beginning to become overwhelmed by the atmosphere. Zhongli was odd enough but you were making it a lot harder to keep up.
“Can we just get the Bell already! What are you even doing at the Wangshu inn anyways?! You knew the bell was needed for the Rite yet here you are, chatting away!”
The way Paimon had quickly become overwhelmed had humored you, and you found yourself chuckling at her nature. "My reason for being here is quite simple- I'm here visiting a friend. The rite is precisely why I chose to be here in the first place. Lets just say, this friend isn't taking too kindly to the news of our late archons passing."
"Fine." Paimon huffed, "Fair enough." and with an extended hand she grunted, "The bell."
Your eyes dropped to the little fairy's extended hand for a moment, a smile gracing your features at her attitude. “How about this," You bid. "I give you the Bell and in exchange you deliver a message to Zhongli for me. Tell him to put his pride aside and visit an old friend would he?”
Paimons face was practically red at this point, stomping childishly at the demand. She was quickly become fed up with your roundabout attitude. “You're seriously gonna make us set up a date for you and Zhongli to hang out in exchange for the Bell!? We’re not match makers you know!”
To which your laugh sounded loud over the balcony, her words amusing you as the realization dawned on you. This little thing is a little slow isn't she. “Oh sweet thing believe me, I wouldn’t need to set up a meeting with Zhongli through mutuals. Lets just say, Zhongli and I meet quite frequently. No, this friend is someone far more special then I, and unfortunately someone that’s quite hard to get through to. I tried to calm him today but it seems like the only person who can truly set his mind at ease is Zhongli himself.”
“You meet with Zhongli quite… frequently? Then deliver the message yourself!" Paimons anger was finally getting to her, a feat which Aether had picked up. You'd noticed that throughout the conversation the boy had been silently laughing to himself, finally taking a step in with a chuckle to lay a deterrent hand on Paimon's back, to which she sighed "Fine. we’ll deliver the message.”
“Exceptional." You declared. The two watched as you wandered off for a moment before returning with a well ornamented bell, shaded a black and golden ombre. It was a beautiful peace of art that was carefully handed off to Aether with a gentle hand. "Then you best be on your way. Be sure to send off my message and do take care of the bell. Like I mentioned, it holds great significance to me.”
The few days following the encounter with the strange woman, the traveller and his companion had experienced what could only be described as true chaos, but after a long and tiresome battle, and the astonishing news that the man they'd been helping was the Geo Archon himself, the two finally found themselves reveling in the settling peace of the city.
The current ambience was that of content, and the people seemed to be a little less tense now that the Rite of Parting had came and passed. The city had found its most still moment in weeks and the traveller found that atmosphere to be something to soak in. That was until a high pitched screech disturbed said serenity.
Aether's eyes widened as he turned to glance at his companion, who was suddenly seething through her teeth at something in front of her.
"That-! That-! Oooh!" Glancing off towards where Paimon was looking, it was then Aether noticed two distinguishable figures walking side by side through the undisturbed harbor- the man they now recognized as the former Geo Archon, and the strange but pretty woman in which they'd briefly encountered at Wangshu inn.
The boys mind couldn't help but wander to a state of intrigue, curious as to how the two knew each other, let alone enough to be enjoying a quite personal stroll around the harbor, but ultimately decided to let the curiosity fizzle and allow the two peace away from disturbance. All until Paimon's seething little figure dashed straight past him and towards the two conversing figures.
At this, Aether was quick on his feet, following his little friend with wide eyes.
“‘The friend I refer to is not myself,’ Paimon's ass! You did just want us to set up a date for Zhongli and yourself!”
Paimon came to a stop in front of the two, Zhongli's eyes darting towards the two with his usual carefree pleased smile, while you, on the other hand, seemed a little more peeved by the interruption.
“Oh Traveller, Paimon, a pleasant surprise indeed.” Zhongli's voice was as smooth as silk, no different from his usual charms. Notably, Zhongli had purposefully disregarded Paimons anger, probably aware that she was less then happy with the both of them at the moment.
"First, you," She pointed an accusatory finger towards Zhongli, "Make us run all over Liyue for your own funeral. Not even dead may Paimon add. And then you-!" This time her finger was directed towards you. "You lied to us! You really were making us play matchmaker!"
Paimon ended her statement with crossed arms and creased brows, to which Aether stood close behind rubbing the back of his head with an apologetic smile towards the two.
At this, you laugh, smiling towards Paimon with what she regarded to be a usual charm for you. “No little one, I really did mean it when I said that Zhongli and I met quite often. The message truly was for the benefit of a friend.”
“Correct," Zhongli interjected with a smile. "I visited Xiao at the request of Y/n here, It seemed she was right, he really did need the company. This current walk is unrelated to your previous conversation.”
“What, so you two are just taking a 'friendly walk’ around Liyue for the hell of it?”
At this, the two smiled at each other with glinting eyes.
It was silent for a moment as Paimon digested the information presented to her and it was then she finally came to her conclusion. These two truly were odd. But on further thought, Paimon thought about how odd you seemed. You were friends with an Adeptus, nae- a Yaksha for that, close enough to be contacting him without issue at Wangshu Inn, now walking around Liyue with the former Geo Archon, and more importantly- you were the one in possession of the Cleansing Bell- an extremely ancient and sacred piece of Liyue's history. Who were you?
“Okay, but by ‘meeting’ Paimon hadn't imagined you meant nice little evening strolls! She thought you meant business meetings! For work! If Paimon wern't mistaken paimon would think you two were dating!”
“Dating?" Zhonglis voice was humorous as he chuckled towards the girl. "Well I sure’d hope so, considering we’re married and all.”
A silence befell the four, both Zhongli and yourself smiling with content and mischief, and the latter two both staring along with wide eyes and dropped jaws.
“Married!?….” Paimons gaze towards Zhongli was as sharp as knives. "So you're telling me you both are married?! And neither of you thought to tell either of us?!" Paimon thought about it for a moment before her eyes went wide at a thought that graced her, and with a small voice she whispered to Zhongli. "D-Does she know?!"
Zhonglis eyes glanced down, a knowing look plastered his face and a smile gracing his soft features. “Paimon, Traveller, I'd told you the cleansing bell was an important part of Liyues Adepti parting traditions but had I ever told you the story and the significance of the Cleansing Bell?”
At this, the two shake their heads.
“Well, the bell is quite a special sentiment in the history of Liyue.
In ancient times, specifically times of the Archon war, the bell was notoriously known to only be given to those in which Rex Lapis himself held a great amount of trust in. It was used as a means to cleanse the mortal realm, and with such power, came the need for a trusted individual to guard it.
"You can't hold possession of that thing forever." Ghuizhong's voice was light against the still air of Guili Plains, the two walking side by side on their way towards a town not too far from the main city. There was a war coming, and in turn business to be done.
"It can't be trusted on anyone else. It's too important. It holds the power to cleanse the mortal realm, and in the wrong hands... well."
"The wrong hands?" Guizhong chuckled in dismay. "You have people you can trust with your life, but no one you can trust with that little bell?"
"It's... significant to me."
Morax's tone was final and at this Guizhong looked sideways, eyeing the expression of the man beside her as they walked. He seemed tense, jaw clenched and eyes glowing a slight golden color. She realized that maybe he'd had an experience before hand, a negative one that lead to the betrayal of trust and maybe even the loss of a life.
That was the moment Guizhong realized that the bell truly wasn't just a bell, at least not to Rex Lapis, and maybe pressing on it wasn't intelligent. She was Rex Lapis' advisor, which meant she knew his temperament and his boundaries. This definitely seemed like one.
Though what wasn't a boundary...
"Alright... But who's to say you can't find someone. You and Acestia seem close."
"Guizhong, stop that." For the first time on this short trip, Guizhong truly laughed.
"What? Just pointing out a fact."
"I don't want to hear this again. You're delusional and quite annoying."
Once again she laughed.
"Guizhong please, I won't hesitate to leave you here."
Rex lapis held the bell in his position for hundreds of years, never trusting anyone enough to hand off the possession to guard. Sure he had people he loved- trusted in battle- trusted with his life. But the bell wasn't just a matter of spears and willpower. It was a matter of serenity and eternal peace. Morax's polearm clashed against that of your own, grunts sounding as you spun around, gliding your weapon against the handle of his own until it fell free from his lock and ready for you to charge again. Morax grinned at your efforts, proud of the way you'd freed yourself from a dire situation without hesitation.
"Good job, smart and quick, don't let yourself be cornered." He commented.
Finally he let off, letting his pole arm hang low as indication that he was pleased with your work for today. "This is a war Acestia, you may be a Yaksha so you may be one of the strongest, but anything goes in war. You must be ready."
With a swift nod, you bowed your head low in respect and smiled. "I understand, and I appreciate the sentiment Lord Geo."
Morax stood for a second, arms low by his side, pole arm firmly between his hand, upper body on full display as he stared down at your bowing form. His hood had fallen during the sparring match you both had indulged in and sweat gleamed his body as a result. You stood quietly, awaiting a dismissal but it never came.
It took a moment, but finally he spoke. "Acestia. What is it you're fighting for?"
Without a moment between, you spoke firmly. "You, Rex Lapis."
"No." His voice was firm, purposeful. And for that your head snapped up, polearm drooping besides you as you glanced on in confusion. Morax looked upon your furrowed eyebrows and noticed how innocently pretty you looked in that moment. Hm. Then he clarified. "What is it you're fighting for."
You let the question digest for a moment, blinking up at the archon with doe eyes as you thought about the answer. What were you fighting for? It took a moment to find your voice, but soon you'd straitened, your illustrious outfit shifting with your bold movements.
"Me? Well, I guess I'm fighting for peace- fighting for an era of serenity. For prosperity and safety to all whom inhabit this land.” Morax observed the sudden glint in your eye as the words escaped your mouth, a response he’d noticed had been pondered upon for quite some time. “I don't want the people I protect to suffer anymore. When I made a contract with you, I made a contract with Liyue- No, a promise. To protect this land and bring tranquillity to this generation, and every generation to come. I do fight for you Rex Lapis, because I fight for Liyue."
Rex Lapis seemed surprised… yet content at your words. It was a response he hadn’t been expecting, but a response he was satisfied with nonetheless. It was the moment he’d realised you’d truely come a long way from the cowering soul he’d found, to one of his most prized Yaksha.
The moment of stillness kept you on your toes, ciphering his expression with a clouded mind, pondering the idea that maybe you’d been just a little bit too passionate in your response. But he finally nodded in approval, and turned his head to the side, indicating that you were dismissed and free to leave as you pleased. Taking the signal, with a shallow bow and your polearm firmly between your fingers, you turned in your spot and made your way over towards Alatus, who had been waiting silently for the sparring match between you and your god to end.
Morax’s eyes followed you as you approached your fellow Yaksha, observing as you smiled wide towards him and initiated a cheerful conversation, in which Alatus had nodded and sent an attentive smile as indication that he acknowledged your words, before bowing in respect towards Rex Lapis, a bow in which Morax swiftly returned. Finally you two both pivoted, Alatus leading the both of you towards the rest of the Yaksha all conversing just a lengths away.
Morax watched as you approached the group, slowly descending to sit on the grass besides Alatus and Bonanus, being swayed into a laugh by something Bosacius had boast about. It was in that moment Morax’s morale felt almost swayed for just a moment. There you were, spouting all the exact words he’d been waiting to hear for decades, slowly tempting him to trust you through your inspiring willpower and heartening morality.
Suddenly, his mind had come to from his thoughts for a moment, and it was only then he’d realised his hand had seemingly subconsciously made its way towards the bell, caressing the material as he watched you interact with your friends. You were starting to become a reoccurring theme in his life- and with this, he turned from his position and made his way off the grass field -And he wasn’t sure if he was too apposed to the idea either.
It was to be guarded by someone Rex Lapis trusted not with his life but with his nation, and that a person he'd never found. That was until an old comrade of his suddenly wasn’t much of a comrade anymore. The war had been raging for so long, he'd hardly remembered the date anymore. A sea of red mirages the landscape of Liyue, rocks carved by his own fingers stained with the blood of his enemies. Rex Lapis heaves a breath as he finds the strength to pull his polearm out of the chest of whichever poor soul had challenged him with intent, finally finding a moment to take a look at his fellow comrades- his Yaksha's fighting beside him.
There he'd find his people, eyes glancing over each one of his 6 Yaksha's- first was Bosacius, releasing an array of attacks upon enemy immortals. Then he'd noticed Bonanus and Indaris fighting side by side, soon was Menogias swiftly dodging a sharp attack and then Alatus plowing though enemies with his jade spear gleaming.
Finally his eyes glanced towards her. You. Vision gleaming and skin coated with a layer of sweat as you swung your spear out of one enemy and straight into another, finally clearing the last of them in your immediate surrounding area. At the moment of calm, you found a second to collect yourself, wiping the splatter of blood that had landed upon your face. It was a deep blue color, unlike the blood you'd been expecting to see and it took a moment to remember that these enemies weren't human. They were just like you.
It was almost as if, the madness of it all had fully consumed you for just a moment, the madness of the war, the fighting, the idea of killing adepti just like yourself. that was until you felt the gleaming gaze boring into the side of your body. In a split moment your eyes had snapped up, making direct eye contact with the man you were here to protect, your god, your diety, your purpose. And everything seemed to snap into place all of a sudden.
Rex Lapis' eyes found yours, and he'd almost let the shock he felt at how tormented your face looked for a moment consume him, if he hadn't taken complete notice of the way his heart fluttered when you looked at him instead. It was as if he was enraptured by you, in that moment all he could see was you.
The screaming of adepti, the weight of his pole arm, the blood on your face, on your clothes, on your hands - he was blind to it all, all except you. Archons, how hadn't he noticed you before, you were absolutely breathtaking and he was stupid for not seeing it before. For the first time he supposed, Guizhong was right.
In that moment, he'd realized that he might have found something he'd finally want to pursue that wasn't bloodshed, maybe he'd play his cards right and try his luck with you. You who's eyes were gleaming at him with wonder. You, who stood drenched in the blood of his enemies, protecting him and his nation. You, who suddenly raised your spear above your shoulder with murderous intent and launched it forward with as much force pummeling straight towards him.
What?!
Morax's eyes finally fleet from your glowing form and followed as the spear suddenly blew straight past and into the chest of a man beside him, watching as he dropped to the ground along with a sword that clattered before him. He stared for a moment before glancing back up to you suddenly before him, hands running down his shirtless figure and along his golden arms searching for any wounds.
The other yaksha's had taken note of the situation and were currently making their way towards the two of you in extreme worry for their god. In the meantime you were doting over him with an extremely worried expression yourself, sputtering words of fear for his health and berating him for not being more aware of his surroundings, yet all he could focus on was the lingering touch of your hands against his body and how amazing the reaction his body gave felt. Oh yeah, Guizhong was definitely right. And he was gonna be trying his luck with you.
Someone he'd fought alongside, someone he'd christened a warrior - a yaksha - with his own two hands, someone he'd renamed and given a new life to suddenly wasn't just a loyal worshipper anymore.
"No longer are you to be commanded by demons, from now on you are a vigilant Yaksha fighting for the protection of Liyue. You are, Acestia."
As the man bestowed your new name upon you, you couldn't help but gaze up into his breathtaking features with wonder, eyes gleaming in wander as your body knelt before your new god, the man that had saved you from your nightmare, pulled you from the grasps of demons who'd had a rule over you for years.
And with one final statement, you were his. "Yes Rex Lapis."
He'd seen her for more then what she was with hands stained of blood.
You eyes opened in a start, breath heaving and head spinning at the sudden awareness. You honestly hadn't a clue how you'd gotten here.
Though you'd noticed you weren't in any immediate danger - being nestled comfortably in the hideout Liyues warriors were using as shelter for the time being, something within you told you to panic.
Breathing was becoming harder a task, more a chore, and your eyes were welling with unwilling tears that began to leak down your face. Your hands lifted earnestly to swipe the rogue tears away all until your pupils made contact with the thick golden liquid staining your hands from your palms to the tips of your fingers.
In a moment of hysteria, a morbid shriek escaped your mouth, thrashing your hands away at your sides in a dire attempt to wipe the adepti blood from your hands. To no avail. Each time you brought your hands back up to your eyeline it seemed like there was more blood then the last. Your crying was becoming heavier, cries for help becoming louder and it wasn't until an arm grabbed your own that you realized there was someone besides you.
Turning to look at the culprit, Rex Lapis stood besides you in a worried daze, eyes searching every inch of your body as you cried in hysterics, begging for relief from the bloodied mess before you.
"Acestia! Acestia! Are you okay?! Please Acestia talk to me."
It seemed he'd been screaming at you for quite some time- if the slight fade in of his voice was any indication to you. Slowly blinking up at him, your tears began to slow. "M-My hands.... What have I done."
Looking down upon your trembling hands held up to your face, Rex Lapis furrowed his brows in confusion. "Acestia, I-... I don't understand."
"They're stained with blood. Who've I hurt this time?"
"Acestia, dear- your hands are..." It took a moment for Morax to find his words. "Your hands are clean. You haven't hurt anyone."
But his words were of no comfort to you, instead you looked down, head hanging as your tears fell to the floor instead. "I'm a murderer. My own people. Slaughtered by my own hands."
"Acestia this is war, I don't know what outcome you expect-"
"No!" You'd never raised your voice like that to your god, yet in your hysterics you didn't seem to care. Neither did he. He just wanted you safe and calm again.
"Not the war! Before... I- I hurt people. I hurt Adepti. I-I'm a monster."
Finally it had dawned on him. The hysterics, the 'blood', the duty you felt to him and this nation. You were haunted by a past that was never yours to decide on. A pawn you were to demons, and in turn those demons haunt you as a knight.
"Never." He'd whispered, suddenly your hands, your bloodied and stained hands had been clenched between two, much bigger. But unlike you'd expected, the blood didn't smear, the blood hadn't transferred onto Morax's hands and stained his as well. No, instead they'd stayed dry and as he leant back to expose your hands to you once more, the blood on your own had dissipated too. Like it was never there- because it was never there.
"You can never be a monster for something you didn't choose. You survived a previous life and you've repented for your sins a million times over with every slash of your polearm you've sent to protect this nation."
The words that escaped the Archons mouth had your own hanging wide open. This man, your god was vouching for you - too you. He was singing your praise and holding your hands as he'd done it.
Your god was worshipping you.
It was almost too good to be true, almost a dream come to life and you would have believed it was if it wasn't for the sudden proximity Morax had gained on you. He was so close all of a sudden, hood down leaving nothing on his upper body but the connecting cloth over his shoulders leading into his long robe behind him.
"I know you don't believe me. But what better forgiveness then the forgiveness of your god?" And with not a moment to spare he'd leant forward to catch your lips in what would be the first kiss of millions to come.
She wasn't just his yaksha anymore but was soon becoming his angel. Only then, when the tides had changed, when the war stopped and harmony soon fall upon Liyue, only when his Yaksha had become his lover, for the first time had he entrusted the bell to someone else.
"I-... I want you to be the new keepsake of the Cleansing Bell."
Suddenly his hands which lay upon your body felt like ice as he spoke. The man lay besides you, lips pressed against the top of your head as he spoke his words quietly and meekly- very unlike Morax indeed.
"What was that?"
"Dont pretend you didn't hear me..." His eyes finally glanced down, your own head creasing up to look at him besides you, his bare body against your own bare body. "I meant it. I trust you with it."
"But Morax, you haven't trusted a soul with it in over 1000 years, why m-"
"Don't you dare question why it would be you while I lay naked besides you." His words were light hearted and humorous, a tone which you couldn't help but smile at. He truly was the most perfect person to you. "This bell isn't just a keepsake. Its a promise- I... I want to be besides you for the rest of your life, and I truly do mean that. You've been with me through hundreds of years of turmoil and war and now my nation has finally found the peace It was seeking. And I... Ive found it too."
You were silent listening to the Archon speak. Through years of trust building, comradeship, friendship and now relationship, he'd always managed to flip the tables and worship you with his words instead. Though this seemed different, this seemed... Life long... Eternal.
"Please say you'll take it. Please say you'll take me too."
And with one final statement, you were his. "Yes, Rex Lapis."
Someone who had still held that bell up until the… passing of said archon.”
“So, the bell was like… a symbol of unity?” Paimons eyes gazed upon Zhongli in wonder, seemingly entranced by the long lineage of love between the former Archon and the former Yaksha.
Finally, Zhongli smiled widely, “In the same way mortals exchange vows and rings, Rex Lapis passed off the Cleansing Bell to her all those years ago. Though as times changed and Rex Lapis... I, made the decision to denounce my archon title, I also thought it fitting to instead follow mortal traditions as well- so, now we pass off the cleansing bell to the Exuvia - Rex Lapis’ old form. And in this new mortal one we exchange rings instead.” And as the story came to a close, the couple extended their hands forward to showcase two equally shiny Cor Lapis ring upon each ring finger.
yeonjun x gender neutral reader
bullet point fic, part two will be written
when you and yeonjun, two of the biggest youtubers on the platform, start getting shipped by your fans it’s only inevitable you catch feelings for one another
part two soon
__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐
✰ you started a youtube channel in your second year of university, you were having trouble making friends and didn’t want to attend the parties so you made the internet your safe space.
✰ after you posted a compilation of your best attacks and scores of your favorite video game, your channel blew up and it became one of your main sources of income. college was rather expensive so you needed it.
✰ through making a channel you made several friends who are also youtubers, but there was one you only admired from afar: choi yeonjun.
✰ you often competed against him to be on the trending page, but more often than not got beaten. you were sure he wasn’t even aware of your existence. which is why you never bothered to reach out to him.
✰ that was until a certain video was posted
✰ in a video of yeonjun reacting to fanfiction one of his fans had sent him a fic of you two in a romantic setting, it didn’t quite occur to you that your fans shipped you up until that point.
✰ you were flustered at the fanfiction and at yeonjun’s reaction to it, he was flushed pink as he nervously laughed his way through the story.
✰ the entire twitter timeline was in flames and you were drowning in the attention, not sure what to do with the increasing amount of followers you were receiving all of a sudden
✰ you were scrolling through the trending tag #YEONJUNYN, swallowing down your nerves as you saw more and more fanart of you two and edits of every time you mentioned yeonjun and vice versa. you hadn’t realized you talked about him as much as you did.
✰ as you were trying to scroll past the obscene amounts of nsfw fanart fans were quickly drawing of you two, a dm notification snapped you out of your haze
✰ soon after that you two would text regularly the week before your planned collab.
✰ they had a bit of flirty undertone, but maybe you were just reading too much into it? time would tell once you met up for your collab.
__________________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐
zhongli x adeptus!gn!reader
(all fluff no angst ur welcome <3)
Once upon a time, in the land of Geo, there was an adeptus who lived among humans. They were well known all across Liyue for their beauty, so much so that suitors from all over the land came to ask for their hand in marriage. However, the adeptus thwarted all proposals. They set forth a contract - whoever wished to marry them would first have to bring them three specific gifts...
Everyone in Liyue Harbor is familiar to some extent with the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor's consultant Zhongli. This, of course, means that as his spouse, they're also familiar with you. Whenever the two of you go out on a walk together, all sorts of people would stop and chat with you - to see how the two of you are doing, or to implore Zhongli's seemingly endless knowledge on all sorts of subjects. Needless to say, thanks to this, as well as your husband's refined tastes, you know most merchants that the city had to offer. This often comes in handy - such as now, when your wedding anniversary rapidly approaches and you find yourself at a loss. The two of you have long moved past the need for gifts to mark special occasions, yet this doesn't stop you from wanting to show your continued appreciation for him.
...Many approached them, but it soon became apparent that this was a task impossible for any mortal to accomplish. Their fame continued to spread regardless. Eventually, even Rex Lapis, the Lord of Geo himself, heard of their impossible challenge. He headed off to the adeptus' residence to investigate the matter for himself. Yet even the ever stoic archon was swept away by their immeasurable beauty...
As you peruse the streets in search of inspiration, you overhear Zhongli's favourite storyteller Tian narrating to a small crowd in the restaurant. You move closer to listen as well - you quite enjoy hearing how exaggerated the stories of your husband's exploits become with time. You often tease him about it, only for him to tease you back about the many rumours about adepti that swirl around Liyue. Regardless of its accuracy though, Tian's story gives you an idea and when he's done, you approach him.
"Ah, good day. To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I was wondering if you would do me a favor," you say, "You see, mine and Zhongli's wedding anniversary is coming up and I wanted to request a particular story for the occasion."
You go on to explain your idea to him and then have to bear the embarrassment when he coos at you. Still, he gladly agrees to help you out.
..."I have come to judge for myself," said Rex Lapis, "Whether you have made a fair contract. After all, a contact with truly impossible conditions cannot be a fair one."
"You're welcome to try your hand at it yourself, my lord. You'll find all is accomplishable," responded the adeptus, "And should you choose to bring me the three items I request, then I shall certainly uphold my end of the contract."
And thus did Rex Lapis set off to win the adeptus' heart...
On the day of your anniversary, you wake up to Zhongli kissing your forehead. You try to keep him in bed with you, but his early riser habits prove a much too formidable opponent. He chuckles softly at your antics, then picks you up without warning and brings you with him to the kitchen. It catches you off guard and your laughter echoes in the hall of your home. He cooks you breakfast as you discuss your plans for the day and you make sure to tell him that dinner is on you. He seems intrigued by your secrecy and your giddiness, but you only tell him to wait and see. You spend your day with him visiting all your favourite spots around Liyue and recalling your favourite memories, using your adeptal powers to make sure normal people don't see you. When evening comes you go back to the harbor and take a seat in his favourite restaurant. As agreed upon, Tian begins the story you requested from him - the legend of how Rex Lapis met his spouse.
"He's never told that one before." Zhongli remarks, surprised, when the story begins. "I assume this is your doing, dear?"
"I simply suggested he expand his repertoire, is all." You smile innocently and he fondly rolls his eyes at you.
...First, they requested a treasure unheard of - silver with the shine of gold and gold with the shine of silver. And so Rex Lapis gathered his most trusted adepti companions. Under the brightest glow of the moon and the strongest shine of the sun, they worked tirelessly and eventually forged a ring. The ring could change its material from gold to silver and from silver to gold purely on the whim of its wearer. And when it was finished, the Lord of Geo immediately began his work on the second request.
For their second gift the adeptus demanded a breath neverending. For this, Rex Lapis travelled to the land of freedom and requested help from his old friend - the God of the Wind. Rex Lapis brought him a qingxin from the highest peak of Liyue. Then, Barbatos summoned a wind from the air and had it gently rustle the petals of the flower. And so Rex Lapis had his second gift, for the petals would tremble unbothered by time until the wind itself runs out of breath.
In the final request, the adeptus said this - a place of eternal peace and serenity, undisturbed and safe from harm. Rex Lapis alone raised the ground and created a mountain, and on the mountain - a house. This house would be accessible only to them and those whom they chose to welcome inside. And then, only when he had all of his gifts, did Rex Lapis finally return to the adeptus' abode.
"I have judged your contract fair and its conditions fulfillable," said the Lord of Geo, "And I bring you the items you requested - a ring fit to your whims, a flower to compliment your beauty and a home to be shared in everlasting love. For i swear to never leave your side, to never upset you, to never let harm befall you as long as I live, and yet beyond that."
"Your gifts are most ingenious, Rex Lapis," laughed the adeptus then, "And yet I wonder if you noticed? These feats were meant only for you to accomplish, and you alone..."
"I do hope the two of you enjoyed the story," Tian approaches you when the crowd dissipates after his performance. "And happy anniversary!"
"Thank you kindly. It was certainly quite a dramatic rendition." Zhongli says and you can't help but delight in the slight blush on his cheeks.
"Sounded pretty accurate to me," you laugh, "Though who can say? The original events are lost to time, after all."
"Indeed, we can only guess as to what truly transpired. Please, enjoy the rest of your dinner." Tian bids you both goodbye, and yet, he can't help staring at your wedding ring. He is almost sure it was silver when the two of you last spoke. It must be the lights and the story getting to him...
...And so did Rex Lapis and his beloved set the tradition of Liyue for generations to come. A ring, a flower and a home, but most important of all - a contract fit for two to honor until the end of time...
Hello 👋,
I hope this message finds you well. My name is Aziz, and I’m reaching out with a heartfelt plea to help my family find safety and reunite with our mother. 😞
The ongoing war in Gaza has torn my family apart. My mother and newborn sister are stranded in Egypt, while I, along with the rest of my sex family members, am trapped in the midst of the genocide in Gaza. We have not only been separated but have also lost our home and are enduring unimaginable hardships. 💔
Your support can make a difference. Whether by reading our story, donating, or sharing our campaign with others, you can help us reunite, find safety, and start anew. 🙏🕊
Thank you, from the depths of my heart, for your kindness, compassion, and solidarity during this difficult time. ❤🍉
https://gofund.me/58268669 🔗
reposting
free palestine 🇵🇸
https://gofund.me/58268669
downbad!enhypen hyung line x fem!reader content(s): fluff, enhypen being down so horribly, terribly, bad, like whipped whipped for (y/n), (y/n) is sassy and loves to tease, pet names, one profanity, alcohol type: oneshot
˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚ synopsis: in which (y/n) doesn’t call them her boyfriend because they haven’t officially asked her to embark on an official courtship˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚
⋆˙𐙚 L.HEESEUNG 𐙚˙⋆ “…you’re gonna be the death of me!”
“don’t you think this would look good on us?” heeseung asks as he lifts up a pair of couple-y beanies and looks at (y/n) expectantly.
(y/n) shifts her gaze between the two before she brings it down. “don’t they look too couple-y?”
“yeah, i mean that’s the point, righ—wait, what do you mean ‘too couple-y?’” the realization hits him late and (y/n)’s already walking out the store, bells hung on the door chiming behind her.
heeseung hastily puts back the beanies, panicky, before he runs out to follow her. “(y/n)! (y/n), wait! what do you mean by that?”
“by what?” the girl monotonously responds.
“there’s nothing wrong with wearing matching stuff, right? aren’t we a couple? or do you not like it?” heeseung worriedly bombards her with questions as he sticks behind her like a tail—almost stumbling entirely when she stops abruptly.
“we aren’t, though.”
“huh?”
“we aren’t a couple,” (y/n) corrects him and his eyes widen as lips gape—frantically moving to stand in front of her when she budges in the slightest.
“are you breaking up with me? please, (y/n). i-i don’t know what it is but i’ll make it up to you! please not like this, no. i don’t want to lose you,” heeseung pleads as his hands shakily grab her shoulders—much too soft to actually say he even put force but the way his fingers curl, securing onto her show that he’s more than ready to latch on for his life. “tell me. tell me what i did wrong.”
(y/n) stares at his face, the desperation and concern paint him so clearly and a guilty sigh leaves her. “we can’t break up if we weren’t together in the first place.”
now confusion settles over him. his brows knitting and doe eyes searching into hers. “what do you—oh.”
and finally putting the pieces together, a loud laugh escapes him while his not-girlfriend frowns, a small pout playing on her lips.
he coos while his thumb brushes over them. “aww, is that what this was all about?”
“heeseung, you—”
“(y/n),” he interjects with his voice laced with so much charm she just can’t refute. an endearing smirk threatens to appear on his face as he cups her cheek—looking down at her with the most tender and sincere gaze. “will you let me be your boyfriend? please?”
the air’s knocked out of the other at his soft little voice that instantly extinguishes any sort of fire in her as she instead, melts into his arms that magically made their way around her waist.
she clears her throat. “yeah, i guess. yeah.”
he finally lets the smirk form as he swoops down and pecks her forehead, eliciting a gasp of surprise from her and he chuckles at her expression. “now let’s get those couple-y beanies to celebrate our official first day as a couple, hm?”
“…yeah,” the girl bashfully replies with cheeks tinted in a shade of pink.
heeseung’s chest tightens at how cute she is to the point it’s hard to breathe and he squeezes her against him—pressing her face into his chest as he resists the urge to just gnaw at her head. “you’re just so—gosh, you’re gonna be the death of me!”
“hee, my makeup!”
the way his nickname rolls from her tongue so casually is music to his ears and he bites his lip, shutting his eyes as his head falls back. “i’m the luckiest person ever to have you as my girlfriend.”
⋆˙𐙚 P.JONGSEONG 𐙚˙⋆ “silver or gold?”
there’s something off. he can’t quite put his finger on it—but there’s something terribly wrong. and it’s not just because of his and (y/n)’s cuddle sessions with her hugs too short to even be called cuddles, or the lack of kisses from her and hesitant acceptance of his or even the way she sometimes cringes at the pet names he uses on her.
but also because of the way she treats him in general. she’s still affectionate—greeting him with the biggest, most beautiful smile, going out for lunch dates with him and paying for his order because “last time you paid for everything” which, in his perspective is mortifying because why?? would she?? do such a thing??
it’s his responsibility—or so he claims—to spoil her as much as possible. he wants to be the one to feed her, buy her all her silly little trinkets and take her out on shopping sprees and carrying all her bags so why?? it breaks him to see her act the way she is.
but at the end of the day, it’s still affectionate, isn’t it? as much as he can’t comprehend it, he sees it as his girlfriend wanting to treat him every once in a while to show appreciation or something—a self-hypnosis, one might say so he doesn’t fall into hysteria.
despite his suspicions however, he says nothing and lets things flow as he takes the opportunity to observe her more, in hopes he can at least make a small conclusion so he won’t upset her by asking the wrong thing.
and today’s the perfect time for it since they’re having another one of their lunch dates. he sits anxiously at their table as he watches (y/n) who’s still at the counter—having bumped with her friend and now she’s accompanying her as she orders.
“is that all you’re having?” (y/n) asks her friend who nods and right after, the former passes the cashier her card—surprising her friend to which she assures her it’s all fine. “no, i insist! after all, last time you paid for everything.”
jay who has been a loyal, attentive audience this whole time instantly feels himself being washed over with dread. small lips parting and hand resting on the left side of his chest as it dawns on him.
all this time…(y/n)’s been treating him like a friend. not a lover. it all makes sense now. the distance she put between them and the affections shown that are always in border between friend and lover but never more to the latter—he sees it now.
“jay? what’s going on?” (y/n) asks from her seat facing him. “you’re zoning out. hello?”
he just had a short circuit and her saying “jay” so simply is only rusting his gears from overtime working.
“‘jay?’”’he echoes with a small frown on his face. “why jay?”
his question baffled her and she emits a small confused yet amused scoff.
“that’s your name? what else am i supposed to call you?”
“baby, bae, darling, honey—” he starts listing out loving pet names and making her gape at his eloquence. she’s not sure if being so knowledgeable in this subject is really useful at all but it’s impressive. “there are so many you can use! just not just my name as it is. we’re not friends…right?”
ding ding ding! finally, the man gets it and (y/n) lets a mischievous smirk play on her lips.
“i’m pretty sure we are, though,” she teases and her date’s jaw detaches, crashing to the floor along with his heart in shards. she giggles and the sound itself revives him, now looking at her with eyes wide and lips pressed expectantly. “i mean, i don’t recall being asked to be someone’s partner so…”
an audible gasp leaves him before he reaches out to hold her hands in his on the table. “my love, i should’ve known. i shouldn’t have left things be unclear between us. so, silver or gold?”
his question confuses her. “huh?”
“for our couple rings. i’m using it to propose to you to be my girlfriend later. so, silver or gold? actually, diamonds will be best, right? you only deserve the best.”
“wait, slow down—”
“how many carats?”
“jay!”
“‘jay???’”
“…sweetie? babe??”
“so much better <3”
⋆˙𐙚 S.JAEYUN 𐙚˙⋆ “i can even be your doormat!”
it’s not a secret that sim jaeyun is sometimes the embodiment of a human puppy. so it’s not surprising to see him literally following (y/n) around like tail—even before they professed their love for one another.
the only difference now is that he’s much braver in initiating skinship to show his affections like fixing her hair, or cupping her cheeks, drawing circles on whatever part it is that he’s touching on her and even cuddling with her to the point that he’s practically sandwiching her onto the couch with his buried in the crook of her neck.
but he notices something: it’s always been one-sided. and that’s weird. because as far as he knows, one of (y/n)’s love languages is physical touch. but it’s not like she rejects any of his advances, she accepts them all. maybe she’s just not very keen on starting it, but is always up for it.
so he lets it be.
until at one point, it starts to bug him and eat him from the inside out, leaving him shriveled like a wilted flower lacking every single form of nutrient and water—and all the sun’s doing is just drying up every bit of moisture and drawing the life out of him.
“(y/n)…” jake croaks weakly as he crawls onto his phone that he previously threw onto his couch, now only a sliver of the man he once was with his cheeks hollow and lips chapped as his sickness riddles him. a terrible sickness caused by (y/n) deficiency.
the other end of the call rings a few times before the voice of his beloved sings through, instantly energizing him. “hello? jake?”
“(Y/N), I NEED YOUuUuUu~” he howls and (y/n) has to pull her phone away from her ear. “i’m SICK.”
concern fills her quickly after. “sick?? what happened? do you have a fever?”
she’s bombarding him with questions as she hastily puts on her shoes near her main door, ready to leave right after. the pitiful sob from him that follows after only heightens her worry.
“i’m sick…of missing you,” he finishes and (y/n) nearly trips over air just as she’s about to step to the door. “please come over and cuddle…please…?”
his desperate whimpers are just so adorable that it nearly shatters her resolve of playing hard-to-get. nearly.
squinting her eyes and crossing one arm under chest and hooking it to the other that holds her phone to her ear, she then hums questioningly. and gosh, does jake feel like every second is another hour taken from his life span.
“no.”
nevermind. he’s dead now.
“wh-what? what do you mean ‘no?’”
huzzah! he’s been resuscitated. he wants justice.
(y/n) captures her lip between her teeth—holding back her amused chuckles at his cute confusion. “that sounds like a very boyfriend-girlfriend activity, jake. and we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend…”
beep! beep! beep!
he…hung up??
(y/n) gapes and calls him.
“the number you’ve dialed is unreachable…” the automatic machine answers.
again.
“please leave a message after the beep!…”
again.
still no answer.
worry creeps in again as (y/n) slips in her foot back into her shoe which she took off mere minutes ago. just when she stands however, a persistent ringing of her door bell freezes her momentarily.
swinging the barrier between her and the source open, she’s met with surprise to see sim jaeyun, the man himself, down on his knees as he looks up at her with doe eyes glossed over.
“jake! wha—”
“we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend? what did i do? tell me, i’ll fix it!”
“you didn’t do anything!”
“i didn’t? the-then, why?”
(y/n) opens her mouth to answer when she suddenly realizes that him not doing anything is exactly the problem—and her momentary hesitation is enough to have him clasping his hands together in desperation.
“please please please, don’t throw me away! i love you so much, i won’t be able to live without you! please please, pretty princess? PLEASE!”
the girl’s eyes widen at his sudden pleads and she anxiously looks at the other doors in the corridor, hoping her apartment neighbors will disregard the chaos occurring. “jake! jake, stand up! stop doing this!”
“NO! you’re mad at me! i don’t know why but…still! is it because i’m too clingy? because i asked you to come over? sh!t! i should’ve been the one to come over not you! i’ll be better, i promise!”
“what?? no! there’s nothing wrong with that just listen to me and get—”
“NOOOO!! i’m not getting away! i’m not leaving! just keep me by your side! i’ll do anything! i-i can even be your doormat—here! right here!”
the sound of a rattling doorknob triggers (y/n)’s fight or flight and she seizes jake’s wrist that’s conveniently raised—thanks to his howls and pleads of “you said you love me!” and “love me backkkk~” respectively—and she hauls him into her apartment.
jaeyun’s eyes widen at the abrupt motion and he stumbles onto the floor of her house but before he can say anything, a pair of soft lips smash against his—ridding him of every thought as his hands instinctively reach up to cup her cheek and nape.
he limps backwards, now completely against the floor while (y/n) hovers and his vision darkens as his eyes shut—reveling in the addicting sweetness of her taste.
a small whine sounds from him when she pulls away and he chases after her lips—wanting nothing more but to relish in her essence endlessly yet her hand that gently pushes him down by the chest halts him.
she giggles at his dazed expression—his breaths shaky, eyes blown out and half-lidded as he peers up at her. “i do love you, jakey. i just said we weren’t a couple because you haven’t asked me out yet.”
“i haven’t?” he slurs like a drunken man, still on cloud nine from her kiss and his gaze casts frequent glances onto her glistening, rosy nubs. “must have been in my dream then.”
“yeah, must be,” (y/n) chuckles and sits on his lap before hauling him up—instantly getting engulfed in an embrace with his arms coiled around her waist and nose buried in the crook of her neck. feeling ticklish, the girl elicits a few titters which makes him smile against her skin.
“i can’t believe i let my princess feel so frustrated for so long,” he muffles into her. “but don’t worry, i’ll ask you now.”
“i’m all ears.”
“will you marry me?”
“HUH??”
⋆˙𐙚 P.SUNGHOON 𐙚˙⋆ "love me, please"
sunghoon is more emotional of a person than how he seems. he just hides himself well and even when others try their best to push him to the edge, he will never lose his grip on his thread nor walk the plank—able to pull himself up and return to the safe shores.
of course, he’s still human and thus, will never be completely impenetrable. one common weakness among those with strict discipline? alcohol.
“i don’t know why…she doesn’t love me,” sunghoon sobs into his arms as he’s hunched onto the counter and almost slipping off his stool. jake looks down at him before a sigh escapes. he was amused seeing his usually stoic and smiley friend act so sappy at first—but that was 3 days ago and he’s still being it since.
jake pats the other’s pack. “why don’t you ask her? i thought you guys confirmed your feelings for each other?”
sunghoon nods against his arm as a low groan rumbles through him. “we did…but then i overheard her saying to her friends that we ‘aren’t together’ and are just ‘two people who share mutual affections.’”
“maybe you misheard?”
a wail akin to a whale’s call sounds from the drunken lad and jake looks around frantically, embarrassed, and is for once thankful for the blaring DJ remixes that burst people’s ears.
“i didn’t. i heard clearly what she said, that’s why i ran away… i left her there… i screwed up our lunch plans… she’s gonna hate me more! it’s my fault! why did i just—WAAaaAaA!”
once again, his friend finds himself in a fluster, scared that someone’s going to think that a marine creature’s been illegally smuggled into the establishment—causing him to haul the taller lad onto his shoulders and out of the place of business.
“there you go. stay,” jake huffs as he laboriously drops his friend onto the bench outside before pulling out his phone. dialing a number, he then puts the gadget to his ear. “hello? sorry for calling you so suddenly but uh, sunghoon’s kind of in a situation i know you’re the only who can save him from. oh, no! it’s not anything dangerous! it’s just, well…”
after hearing his explanation, it doesn’t take long for the girl to zoom to the club and there, she meets a passed out sunghoon on a cold wooden bench and jake sitting on the edge of his seat—not having enough space due to the drunkard.
“hey, thanks for coming,” the slightly older male says with a smile and nods with gratitude at her. she reciprocates.
“so…you say he’s been doing this for 3 days straight—since he overheard me?” (y/n) confirms and jake’s affirmation elicits a long sigh from her. “dummy hoon. thanks for accompanying him, jake. i’ll take over from here.”
bidding goodbye, (y/n) then approaches the sleeping young man. her heart flutters at his delicate yet sharp visages that simply steal her breath away even when he’s doing something utterly mundane such as sleeping. her hand lifts to cup his cheek, flinching at the coldness of his skin. “sunghoon, wake up. hoon?”
she nearly has a cardiac arrest when the man’s eyelids shoot open and he springs to a sitting position before facing the blanched girl.
“(y/n)!” he exclaims cheerily with the most radiant beam before engulfing her whole against his figure—muscly biceps securing around her frame as she squeaks from the sudden embrace. she chuckles, adoring how he’s still able to be so gentle with her even whilst drunk. “hi, my love~”
the nickname brings a blush to her face that’s already mantling from the cold. “come on, let’s get you to the car.”
as soon as he’s in the passenger’s seat, (y/n) bends down slightly in front of him to secure his seatbelt but pauses when sunghoon’s head drops onto her shoulder—rubbing his forehead against the fabric covering her skin.
“(y/n)…you’re so warm,” he murmurs, eyes shut and lips parted. “if only you were really here.”
his words make the girl’s brows knit. ‘does he think he’s imagining me?’
click! the seatbelt connects and she shuts his door before going to the driver’s seat.
the drive is mostly quiet with sunghoon being drowsy and (y/n) busy with trying to get him home safely but the tranquility is broken by an unexpected monologue by the former.
“i do this again and again just to see you… and you’re always there. but i wake up and you’re gone…always gone,” sunghoon murmurs in his sleepiness, and (y/n)’s fingers tighten around the wheel at his confession—feeling her heartstrings getting tugged. “i love you so much, it hurts.”
(y/n) glances at him, feeling a surge of guilt and swallows dryly. “if the real (y/n) was here, what would you tell her?”
“i’d apologize for canceling our lunch date again. and tHeN! i’d apologize again and tell her i’ll do wAyYyYY better! i’ll be the BEST MAN she’ll ever have!” sunghoon exclaims in an inconsistent rhythm—bursting on some words and calm for the others. “the LAST one too! she’s going to end up with me, i’ll make sure of it.”
his drunken confession affects her more than she thought—butterflies erupting and tickling her from the inside out with their soft, rapid wings.
“oh, really?” she teases, an amused grin worn as she faces the road which isn’t unseen by sunghoon.
his sudden quietness confuses her but soon feels his scrutinizing gaze prickling at the side of her cheek—her peeking at him from her peripheral.
“woah. you’re the best version of (y/n) my brain’s made. you feel and look real…so warm and pretty like how my (y/n) really is… my gorgeous, gorgeous girl… hihihi…” his lovesick bashful giggles from his own comment instantly beats all her favourite music and artists, defeating all her playlists and reigns the throne.
his eyes upturned in a blinding eyesmile as cheeks and nose glow a bright red from both the alcohol and the lovey dovey, giggly mood he’s brought to himself. he’s so cute. a cutie pie.
by the time they arrive at his home, he’s onto his reason number whoever knows on his list of ‘why my-not-but-still-my-girl aka.(y/n) is the best girl.’
he flops on his bed when (y/n) drops him with a large grunt before joining his side in exhaustion. big mistake.
because now she’s caged within sunghoon’s beefy arms and as much as she loves nothing more than to stay in them—suffocate in them even, but he’d never let—she has to go home.
“sung—oof! sunghoon!” she grunts and wriggles in his unbudging grasp and just when she tries to slip through by sliding down vertically and off the edge of the bed, he nuzzles into the side of her head—drawing figures in her hair with the tip of his nose.
“love me, please,” he whispers and that instantly shuts down her motor—now completely still as she slowly turns to him. her eyes dance across his face that’s slightly scrunched and she can tell it’s because of what he overheard her say. he’s thinking about it again.
“i do love you, hoon—so so much that it physically squeezes the air out of me sometimes. i only said what i said because i realized we never made it official and whenever i hinted at you, you just acted like it was nothing. just going with it without accepting or denying anything,” (y/n) explains in a whisper as her finger moves up to trace his features.
freezing suddenly when she reaches his mouth and the corners begin to curl up.
“so i just need to make things official and we won’t just be ‘two people who share mutual feelings together?’” he asks with clarity. the lack of muddled mumbles and dragged words instantly tell the other of his sobriety.
she looks up, taken aback to see him already staring down at her with the most endearing of gazes—shifting between her eyes constantly before letting it dance across her face and back to melting their gazes together.
“i guess so…” she mutters, flustered and belatedly shy from the proximity.
sunghoon catches his bottom lip between his teeth, finding the sight before him simply too adorable and presses a kiss on her forehead. “then, just as i am already yours, will you be mine?”
his concise offer makes her heart skip beats but it still doesn’t compare to hoon’s that’s running a mile a minute, vigorous thumps almost blending into one another and she feels it from the way he hugs her tight.
so much for mr.cool guy act.
“it would be my honour, hoon,” she replies with a cheeky grin and a second later she’s squealing from getting bombarded with butterfly kisses—unknowing of his struggle to keep himself together and not just crush her every bone from the cuteness aggression, finding her to be the loveliest ever.
ᡣ𐭩ྀི₊ ⊹ masterlist ᝰ.ᐟ✮⋆˙
𝜗𝜚 hi, it’s romi here!! thank you so much for reading to the end!! if you enjoyed it, don’t forget to leave a heart and reblog—they give me some motivation, ya know? but please do not spam like!! X♡X♡, romi ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
copyright © 2024 thinemoonshine all rights reserved
─── 𝐖𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐄
+ sae x f!reader | wc 4.9k | content: angst, fluff, some making out, implied sex, stupid teenager phase
notes: sobs this was not supposed to be this long … one of y’all need to stop me from writing about this man !! i love him too much, pls send help </3 extra: this is the song playing in the last scene :’)
summary: sae has few interests, and one of them is you. but sometimes, being special just isn’t enough.
you’ve always been special.
ever since age three when your family moved across the street from where the itoshis lived. ever since age five when you finally gathered the courage to talk to the pair of brothers. ever since age six when sae invited you to play with him and rin. ever since age seven when you cried because someone bullied you at the playground and sae wiped away your tears. ever since age ten when both of you played with paper rings. ever since age eleven when you and sae would talk endlessly at night through the phone and get nagged at by your parents when they found out.
ever since age twelve when you told sae you’d watch him become the best soccer player in the world by his side.
your presence bleeds into sae’s life and he can’t think about anything without relating it to you; like how his breakfast tastes like ass when you’re not smearing your stupid peanut butter on it because apparently peanut better goes well with everything is your phase at that point of time. like how he’s walking home and he’ll always have to crane his head to the right just to check if you’re on your front porch swing, because if you are, he’ll wave and then you’ll smile and wave back, and sae would feel like it’s a special code you two share.
you’re probably the only thing he pays his spare attention to. and rin. you, rin, soccer. that’s all.
you complain way too much, especially at the fact that sae doesn’t smile often. he counters, “that’s none of your business.”
and you tell him one day you’ll be the reason he smiles everyday.
sae thinks it’s kind of stupid though, because you already are. you just aren’t around to see it. he’ll probably never let you see it too. he wouldn’t hear the end of it if he did.
it isn’t long before you’re age fifteen and graduating middle school and you’re excited to start high school. it didn’t really make a difference for sae, as long as he got to play soccer, he really couldn’t care less.
when you’re age sixteen you tell sae that a boy from class broke your heart because he didn’t accept your valentines’ chocolates. it was as good as a rejection, apparently. or whatever girl code says it is.
frankly, sae’s just offended. you’ve never given him any valentines’ shit. all of a sudden some no name guy is getting it?
maybe it’s true what people say, teenage girls cry over stupid things they consider love that’s not actually love. now you’re getting his soccer jersey wet with your tears and you’re crooning on and on about how boys suck but somehow sae’s still the best.
you’re sixteen and crying on sae’s shoulder, while he’s seventeen and wishing he could torture the son of a bitch who made you cry.
this is the closest you’ve ever been, physically. your heart’s not really broken because whoever you’re crying about has never really had it. but sae doesn’t know that.
teenage girls make really stupid decisions sometimes. and other times, they making stupid passing comments, like when you say “glad i didn’t let him kiss me. would suck for my first kiss to be with a dick who didn’t give a shit about me.”
sometimes teenage boys make stupid decisions too.
sae doesn’t really know what possesses him to do this, but he doesn’t stop it. he doesn’t stop his hand from reaching out to you, doesn’t stop his fingers from tilting your chin up. there’s only confusion in your eyes when he looks into them. there’s only hesitation in his.
sae’s not anything to you except for a childhood friend, and you’re not anything to him, except for one of the most beautiful people he’s ever met. that’s why he does this slowly, so you have time to stop this.
he has no right to do this. he wishes you would just stop him.
you’re both teenagers when sae becomes your first kiss, when your tears stain his cheeks and he tastes like the fruits he just ate. you’re both delirious off of the feeling, like neither of you want this to end because your lips stay connected even when you’re not moving, and your lashes are fluttering against one another’s and sae really wants to kiss you again.
but it’s late and your parents are probably the ones knocking on his door right now so he stops himself and pulls away while rin bounds down the stairs to open the door.
sae sees nothing but you, you and your pretty face and your pretty lips and your perfect perfect person.
“there, now your first kiss is with a dick who does care about you.”
it’s that same summer and you’ve forgotten all about the stupid boy that supposedly broke your heart. you have sae with you whenever he’s free, when he decides to bring you out after practice and explore rooftops to find the best view for the fireworks.
you’re not together, but it sure feels like you are.
then it’s autumn and the leaves are turning orange and red, and you swear you see sae’s cheeks and ears turn nearly the same shade when he holds your hand for the first time as you walk through the park, a white cat crossing in front of you.
sae blames it on his practice earlier and that he’s tired because there’s no way he’ll ever admit it’s because of you.
when winter comes, sae’s still taking care of you. nothing stops him from playing soccer, but nothing can stop him from finding you either. sae’s starting to regret his decisions when you force him to go ice skating and look at him expectantly whenever you see a mistletoe.
you’re a lot of work, maybe you’re worth it.
and then you kiss him again and he thinks yes, maybe he can do this. he can juggle soccer and you, it’ll magically work out.
finally it’s spring and you’re excited because you love the cherry blossoms, and sae thinks maybe he loves something else but he’s not going to go there yet. and while everyone’s watching the solar eclipse that one night, sae’s watching you.
for once, he wants to believe in superstitions, wants to believe what watching the solar eclipse means.
“what’s the matter?”
you’re always so perceptive. you’d make a great playmaker, he feels.
of course you pick up on the tension, barely a minute after you walk into his room. sae doesn’t want to ruin this, whatever this is, whether it’s love or something less, or maybe something more.
but it’s not a democracy, and the answer is crystal clear in sae’s mind. his answer’s always been the same, but it’s not like you don’t exist in his world.
“the club in spain gave me an offer.”
that’s all he needs to say to make you understand. and if you weren’t the most understanding person he knows, you might’ve reacted differently, but you’re still the same supportive, kind girl he met at age four.
“when do you go?” your voice is shaky and he knows you’re trying to hold it together.
sae’s sorry, really.
“next month.”
it’s not a lot of time, but probably enough to say goodbye. then you throw your arms around him and you work your magic, you say you want to try despite the distance, despite the unknown timeline. and who is sae if not someone who’d give it a try?
he’s not even sure he can ever say no to you.
it doesn’t seem real until the night before he leaves, because you’re eighteen and standing in his near barren room, everything already packed into boxes and loaded.
maybe it’s the fact he’ll be gone for a very long time, doesn’t know when he’ll see you again. maybe it’s the adrenaline rushing through his veins when he feels you pressed up against him. maybe it’s the fact he’s denying the depth of his feelings for you and it’s getting him frustrated.
or maybe it’s because he’s selfish and he doesn’t want anyone else to have you, just like how he gave you your first kiss.
he’s your first kiss, and he’ll be your first time, with your hands clawing at his clothes. and you’ll be his, with the way he’s grabbing onto your bare back so desperately.
you’re eighteen and you think nothing’s prettier than the sounds sae makes, especially when his lips are right next to your ear, with his hot breath fanning against you.
sae’s nineteen and he thinks you’re the best thing he’s ever tasted, in all sense of the word. he thinks you look pretty in pink, still pretty when you wear nothing too.
and suddenly sae thinks that maybe it doesn’t feel so crazy to think that the both of you might make it through this.
long distance can work for some people. but sometimes it’s just meant to drive two people further away.
sae’s gaining momentum in europe, and you’re proud of him. you’re proud of your boyfriend, doing his best and showing off his talents and having his hard work pay off.
you’re really, genuinely happy for him. but the bigger of a star he is, the further away he feels, and maybe it’s selfish of you to want him here, to want him to be just your neighbour itoshi sae like how things started out.
maybe it’s selfish and wishful thinking, but you can’t help yourself.
sometimes sae doesn’t even have time to look at his phone. he’s tired and overwhelmed and understandably too. and you feel guilty everytime you subject him to your insecurities.
but you’re nineteen and you don’t know better.
rin’s not much fun to hang around with, especially when he got more stoic and awkward. he’s like a mirror of his brother, and that may fool a lot of people, except you knew him before that. but you’re not going to butt your head in things that don’t concern you, so you leave him be.
and suddenly the itoshis seem further away than they’ve ever been. for the first time in your life, you’re not sure if trying will be enough anymore.
sae misses you. that’s whenever he has the free time to think, when he’s not hounded by trainings after trainings, when he’s not busy from day to night with whatever new training regime they’ve got him on.
is he aware that he’s probably being the world’s worst boyfriend now? yes. but sae can’t force himself to choose that over his dreams. can’t force himself not to choose soccer.
[17:08] she’s fine, idk what you’re worried about.
rin’s message doesn’t alleviate his worries. sae knows you better than anyone, and he doesn’t believe you’re fine.
[08:08] hey sae :)
[17:34] going to bed now, gn!! <3
sae stares at your message for a while in the locker room, while everyone else is showering. you’ve cooled off on the pet names, you’re worried you’re overstepping. you’re worried he’s lost his feelings.
he’s not.
he’d be crazy to.
but he can’t find the energy to convince himself that this would turn out fine. he can’t convince himself that he’s not hurting you every single day by not being able to be everything you need, by not being able to be physically there for you.
this half-assed relationship isn’t what you deserve. and where he is right now, with his bird’s eye view of the world, he doesn’t know if he can ever give you anything else.
[17:49] goodnight. call you tomorrow.
the moment sae breaks up with you, you feel like that kid at sixteen all over again, except this time you don’t have your favourite person’s shoulder to cry on and this time it’s actually love.
all you can think of when you hear him pick up the phone is that morning right before he left for the airport, how his hair’s a mess and how his lashes are way too pretty and how he sounded when he’s all groggy and tired.
but then he tells you the one thing you do not want to hear, and the illusion is shattered into pieces.
“this isn’t working out.”
“what are you talking about?” he’s silent, and you’re anxious. “we’re fine, sae.”
you can hear him sighing over the phone. you so desperately want to fix this, and so does sae but he can’t think of anything more selfish than to ask you to wait for him until he’s ready—he knows what’s the right thing to do. it sucks, but he’s made up his mind.
“that’s bullshit, y/n,” he responds, calmly, and you feel him slipping further and further from you.
“i- look, i-i know it’s hard but we can—”
“give it a break, woman,” sae chuckles, low and deep, and you’re beginning to doubt that you know him at all right now. “we’re done.”
the dial tone is all you can hear after that.
twenty years old is where you have your first actual heartbreak.
and all that talk about how time heals all feels like bullshit when you’re right in the middle of it all. five days in and you’re still a wreck. twenty days later and you’re still staring at the pictures you and sae took together. a month passes and you’re visiting the places you went to together. just a sad, pathetic girl crying on the benches, reliving what she once had.
three months later you’re still watching his matches on tv. you’re still cheering for him inside. four months later and it’s sae’s birthday and he doesn’t even respond to your birthday message. half a year after the breakup and you finally stop crying when you think of him.
but it’s easy to delude yourself when you’re not in the presence of what you grieve. because eight months after you broke up, you see reports that sae’s dating a sports photographer. the next few days, a picture is released of them kissing in a restaurant.
then you get glimpses of other girls being able to be intimate with him. other girls getting to taste his lips and feel his love. other girls getting his attention when that right used to solely belong to you.
and you’ve never felt worse.
“why so glum?”
sae blinks at the woman, indifferent. he can’t even remember her name.
“nadia,” she says, like she’s reading his goddamn mind, holding her hand out. “i’ve been your team’s photographer for a few months now.”
sae shakes her hand out of courtesy because he really doesn’t want his publicist to chew him out again. “didn’t ask.”
“you know, you’re a lot more crabby these days,” she comments, and it’s like he can see the lightbulb going off in her head. “oh, is it girlfriend issues?”
“i don’t have one, so shut it.”
“come on, i promise i’m good at making people forget.” she says this so seductively that sae’s a little disturbed. he just wants to get this shoot done with and go home, maybe even check up on you a little. all in incognito mode, of course, because he can’t risk you knowing he still cares. can’t risk getting your hopes up.
somehow the stars have spent all their time aligning sae’s soccer career and everything else is in tatters because his publicist forces him to take nadia up on her offer and go out with her.
what was supposed to be a one time thing turned out to be something more. she wasn’t even close to you, but she could be close. turns out when he’s not being such a dick, nadia can be moderately interesting.
different, maybe that’s what he needs.
he thinks back to when she kissed him on their first date. sae still finds himself hoping you didn’t see that.
but no, he’s not in love with you anymore. sae’s officially an adult at twenty-one and he’s still the same stubborn guy in denial because he’s looking at pictures of you while nadia’s sitting right next to him.
it’s not healthy, it really isn’t.
you’re twenty-one now and you’re actually going on a date with the sole intention of trying to get over the one and only itoshi sae.
can you even trust your friend? all you know is that the guy is a friend of a best friend’s and that’s all she told you.
“my best friend’s a good guy, so by extension, so is his best friend,” was all she said.
now you’re here, at the amusement park, waiting for your date to show himself because apparently, in your friend’s bid for suspense, she was reluctant to share anything about him except that he’s dreamy and pretty and that his friend describes him as a genius.
and also “oh, he’s a soccer player too so that’s right up your alley, right?”
when the call from date guy comes in (because to stop you from profiling your date she also didn’t give you his name), you kind of like his voice.
“hey, where are you?”
you find out his name is nagi. and that he’s only here because reo stole his switch and he won’t give it back until the date’s over. which kind of works because you tell him you’re only here because you wanted to get over someone.
to which he says it’s a hassle.
there’s nothing you expect out of this, but then you find yourself enjoying your date.
it’s clear by the first fifteen minutes why nagi chose this place to meet. he’s absurdly good at games. he’s won you tons of plushies that you had to give away to some very happy kids. it’s a pattern; every game that he doesn’t know, he only loses once and then he proceeds to dominate.
no wonder his friend calls him a genius.
with nagi it’s easy, fluid. you’ve been spending the whole night there with him, playing together and eating together—well, mostly it’s just you feeding nagi because it turns out he finds a lot of things a hassle.
three days later, you find out that apparently you’re not a hassle in his books. not really, because he asks you out again.
it’s irrational.
sae shouldn’t be this bothered, but he is. he hates seeing your stupid updates about how you’re on a date with this nagi guy. he hates seeing your posts with the two of you wearing matching sweaters for christmas.
he gives it a like.
nadia’s already gone. sae doesn’t have time or energy to waste on people that don’t matter. and you shouldn’t matter. not right now. but here he is, wishing the circumstances were different.
if you and nadia switched places. if you had something to bring you to spain. it’s fucking selfish, he knows. doesn’t stop him from wishing for it. he can’t think of anyone else like how he thinks of you. doesn’t want to.
he really is clueless about everything outside of soccer, because he’s twenty-two when he realises that no one could ever make him forget about you, and maybe he should just live with it.
sae turns twenty-three when he’s in the running for being the world’s best midfielder. he’s gotten rid of the hopes of moving on and he’ll just fake it till he makes it.
maybe that’s why this year is particularly special to him. or maybe it’s because for the first time in a long while, you wish him happy birthday.
at midnight, in japan. because you’re thoughtful that way.
this time he responds.
thanks. how r u?
it’s criminal how easy it is for you to get his heart beating like this. he sees you typing and it’s enough to lift his mood.
great, school’s kicking my ass though.
sae finds himself wishing that he could hear your voice right now. for some stupidly non-complex reason that he finds completely absurd.
i saw your match last week, good game, genius.
fuck. after all this time, he still wants you.
his fingers type i miss you, just for the hell of it. just to see it there on his screen before he inevitably deletes it and replaces it with something mediocre like thanks or i know.
because he can’t just say that after being the one who broke things off. he can’t do that when he still thinks it won’t work out.
all he does is sigh and hit the delete button—except fuck, he accidentally hit send. and he would’ve deleted it if you weren’t already online and read it and he sees you typing for a moment before you stop completely and go offline.
sae has never felt more numb.
it’s been three months since sae said he missed you. you still can’t get that out of your head. the most upfront he’s been about his feelings and he chooses then of all times to be honest?
when your boyfriend was right beside you?
maybe it was your fault. you didn’t even know why you wished him a happy birthday. maybe you missed him too and was just lying to yourself.
god, maybe you’re the asshole in this after all. did you really love nagi? or was he just exceptionally well at making you forget? you really really like him, that’s all you know.
“hey, what’s wrong?” nagi’s looking at you, pushing his hair back, and you can’t help but think you’re lucky to have him these past few months.
but the turmoil inside you wins, and maybe you understand a little bit of how sae felt that night when he broke up with you.
it’s not fair to nagi for you to do this, but it’s not fair to him either to keep him around.
“we need to talk.”
it’s a surreal feeling, to be back in japan.
sae was nineteen when he left. now he’s twenty-seven when he breathes the tokyo air again. he lugs around his carry-on baggage because he’s not staying here for long. not yet. he’s coming back soon, and he doesn’t really know why. he’s milked everything he could from spain, from the rest of europe, some of the americas, and maybe he’s homesick now.
plain and simple.
the cab driver asks him why he looks so sharp, and he simply says, “wedding.”
it’s been seven years since he broke up with you. and your grip on him is as firm as ever. a grip he’ll never let you know you have on him because he’s made this mistake before—said i miss you and then scared you away.
by the next day he couldn’t even find you online because everything is wiped and maybe you hate him, hate his guts. that’s fine. he can live with that.
to him, you’re still the same lovable person as you were at age five. still the same girl at age sixteen that he fell in love with. you’re still his person and it’s fine if he has to just admire you from afar.
when he arrives, he takes a long hard look around the room, filled with guests socialising and drinking their wines and it’s so pathetic but he’s wondering if you’re still around. he’s late, and it’s his plane’s fault but it’s no use playing the blame game.
“hey,” rin calls out when he sees his brother. “you missed the ceremony.”
“yeah, stupid plane got delayed,” sae says, mind still distracted.
rin formally introduces his new wife to sae and she seems nice, polite, the kind that can put his brother in his place if she needs to. that’s nice. sae can’t help envisioning you in the wedding dress though. you’d look nice.
nicer if he was the one beside you.
“oh! as a gift to my now brother-in-law, i have a friend i want to set you up with,” she grins, and as much of an ass that sae is, he just figures he’ll reject the poor girl later. for now, he’ll entertain his new sister-in-law.
rin claps him on the shoulder before smirking and walking off, presumably to get a drink because no matter how much rin has changed, sae doubts he’ll ever become friendly enough to mingle in this crowd.
sae feels someone poking his shoulder and turns around, first to find his sister-in-law grinning from ear to ear, and next to find you next to her, just like he remembers.
pretty in pink, stupid bashful smile, still fucking beautiful.
“have fun,” rin’s wife says before she walks off with a knowing look. she’s already winning points with sae for bringing you to him.
“hey, genius,” you try to suppress your smile but it’s not working.
he thinks he’s dreaming. he’s not. he’s here. and so are you. and this might just be what he missed all this time.
you hold your hand out and he takes it wordlessly, obediently. sae follows you to the dance floor, trying to calm his erratic heartbeats, savouring the feeling of your hand in his once again, remembering that moment back in autumn when he first felt it.
when you wrap your hands around his neck and he wraps his around your waist, it feels like finally, something is real. like there’s something in this country that can really keep him here this time. because now he’s twenty-seven and he finally understands, he’s always loved you but he’s never been ready until now.
“can’t believe you let your brother get married before you,” you say, sarcasm because you’re breaking into a grin. “he actually beat you at something.”
sae pouts slightly, averting his gaze. “what’s the big deal anyway?”
you shrug. “i’d have thought you’d be the first. maybe with one of the girls you met abroad or something.”
there’s a certain bitterness in your tone that he likes, only because it means you minded all this time. the thought of him with someone else. he suddenly remembers something, and searches the room for a familiar face.
gray eyes meet his teal ones before they turn away, disinterested.
“you sure your boyfriend won’t mind you dancing with your ex?”
“probably not, since i don’t have one.” you smirk, sensing the bitterness in his tone too. it’s funny, seeing sae jealous like this.
he has no reason to though, since you broke up with nagi after being honest with yourself—that you’re not over sae and you probably never will be. you’d decided to just live with your decision.
“shame. thought you guys looked cute in those matching sweaters.”
so that was a jealous like, you think to yourself.
“thought you looked cute with that sports photographer girl too, kissing and all,” you say, though it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. “why didn’t that work out?”
for the first time in his life, sae decides to be outright honest with you—
“because she’s not you.” because everytime she said his name, he’d overlay it with your voice in his head. because everytime she’d tried to get close, he’d resent her more for not being you. because no matter how hard anyone tries, they will never be you and that will never work, not for sae.
—to a certain degree.
he’s twenty-seven when he’s finally old enough to understand that it was never a problem with feelings because he’s always loved you all the same all this time. it was just a matter of being ready at the right time. it’s like luck in the world of soccer, where coincidences can only fall to those who are prepared.
and he’s here now. he’s ready.
call him crazy for thinking you’re on the same page because you’re getting closer and closer and closer.
“itoshi sae,” you whisper his name against his lips and he’s reminded of the first time he had you. you drive him crazy and he thinks he’ll keep on letting you. “i missed you too.”
you did. you used to be too young and inexperienced to put yourself in sae’s shoes. too young and naive thinking emotions were enough for two people to stay. sometimes, some things just aren’t meant to be… in the moment. and other times, when you’re both ready, everything suddenly falls into place.
you were sixteen when sae first kissed you. now ten years later, ten years wiser, you kiss again, and this feels significantly better than before. because now you both know.
sae has known you ever since you were three. and he thinks he’ll keep on knowing you, every day, every hour, every minute. he wants to know you forever. and he’s thinking maybe that superstition worked out after all. maybe it was destined to be like this all along.
two people coming together and falling apart only to end up in each other’s arms.
and he thinks fuck superstition, fuck the white cats and solar eclipses and everything else. even if things threaten not to work, this time he’ll make it work.
sae’s known you for so long he overlooked one simple thing. when he kisses you even deeper and is greeted with your lips smiling against his, he knows.
he hasn’t become the world’s best soccer player yet, but when he does, you’ll be by his side.
one day those paper rings the both of you played with when you were little would be real.
you’ve always been special, and you always will be.
now he’s finally home.
𓇻 ॱ˖ 𝑂ℎ, 𝐴𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑙𝑠 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑘 ℎ𝑎𝑖𝑟, 𝐼 ℎ𝑎𝑑 𝑛𝑜 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎
──ॱ˖ ❀ enhypen hyung line and their pink obsessed girlfriend. genre fluff. warnings pet names, swearing, yn is like a pink pinterest girl | enhypen x fem!reader.
lee heeseung ( 이희승 )
to be honest you weren’t really his type.
he mostly went for girls that had a style more similar to his.
when he first met you it was kinda overwhelming just looking at you LOL
you were jays older sister, he didn’t even know jay had a sister until the day he met you.
you were picking jay up from one of their hangouts.
in a pink car…
heeseung cringed when he saw that not only were you in a pink car but also your whole entire outfit was pink.
but he was also like “she’s kinda hot…”
that night he did some digging through jays instagram following and found his pink obsessed sister.
“unintentionally” of course.
he also unintentionally messaged you as well.
and the rest is history.
“this is totally ruining my street cred.” heeseung whined as he sat in the passenger seat of your pink convertible, “I feel like a passenger princess.”
“you’d be the prettiest passenger princess ever.” you teased kissing his cheek before staring the car and backing out your driveway.
“I should be driving you, why are we taking your car anyway?”
“because I need you to take photos of me, and the car needs to be in the view, it completes the outfit and makes me look good.” you respond like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“you always look good, why does that matter!?”
park jongseong ( 박종성 )
he feeds into your pink obsession like no other
he tries his best to act like he doesn’t want too but somehow, he’s always the one pulling out his card at the cashier.
it’s like the angels brought you to him because you always make his days less boring.
“if you like the scent with the blue bottle why am I paying for that one?”
“because it’s pink!”
when he’s out with his friends at the mall, he’s always picking up pink little trinkets that he feels like you’d like.
sometimes they’re not so small.
“you got me the pink chanel bag!” you exclaimed as you opened the box he passed to you, “with the bow too!”
as soon as he came through the door after his hangout he had a smirk on his face and silently passed you a black shopping bag.
“I was gonna save up and get it.” you say leaning into his side as you examine the bag, “what the hell jay.” you say to your boyfriend who just shrugs his shoulders in a I don’t care way.
“you have too much money to waste.” you lecture causing jay to laugh.
“yeah, and I love wasting it on you.” he teases before leaving a kiss on your forehead.
sim jaeyun ( 심재윤 ) cd is playing
literally lets you do anything to him.
he loves his pink obsessed girlfriend.
even if that means she’s putting pink bows in hair every second.
finds the way you like pink so much endearing.
he let you decorate the apartment you both live in together.
“bro you have a pink toaster?”
“oh yeah, yn picked that up the other day.”
remember when I said he will let you do anything to him?
he would definitely let you do those tiktok trends on him.
“babe what are you doing?” jake asked you as you picked up a roll of pink ribbon and sat on the couch beside him.
“just something…” you said grinning before cutting the piece of ribbon and gesturing towards his arm, “pass me your arm.”
he looked and you confused but leaned over towards nevertheless.
he watched as you tied a perfect bow around his upper arm, “uh yn?”
“isn’t it cute! wait let me get my phone.”
he couldn’t help but laugh as he watched you run into your shared room.
park sunghoon ( 박성훈 )
you were a youtuber
you were known for your, grwm, room yours, day in my life and loving pink
he doesn’t even know how he pulled you
in his eyes you were kind of a celebrity.
he could’ve sworn he seen you on his sisters pinterest once.
he’s been in a few of your videos.
most of the time he holds the camera for you.
your viewers love how different you guys are.
he’s the most funny in your shopping videos.
“this whole cart is pink yn.”
in the background of your videos when you’re going your grwm’s all you’ll see is a man decked out in all black sleeping in a pink bed with fluffy pillows surrounding him.
sunghoon held the camera for you as you walked through the store for your new video.
“oh my gosh!” you say before rushing towards the thing that caught your eye, “wouldn’t this be so cute for my place?” you said asking your boyfriend who gives you an unimpressed look.
“do you really need a pink kettle?”
“I don’t know how I didn’t get one sooner.” you say smiling innocently as he shakes his head.
“just put it in the cart.”
delicate | nishimura riki
౨ৎ ## love so delicate like yours, synopsis: you've realized how far you've gotten with your boyfriend now that both of you are adults.
includes: 1.9k words | soft fluff | yn is anxious asf but riki comforts them | we love reassurance | movie notebook reference 😎 | yn got a tattoo and it makes riki fall in love with them more 🙆♀️🙆♀️
extra: at this point, all of the members are taylor swift coded | soft love is the best love | yn is me because im also 18 and i dont wanna pay taxes D:
likes, reblogs, and comments are appreciated! <3
[below the cut]
you sighed as you laid yourself flat against the blankets. you smiled in delight as if your troubles and worries left you.
“school’s over.” you said, feeling your chest heavy. you recalled the school memories that you’ve experienced; both happy and sad, now that you’re taking the next chapter of your life; college.
it’s leaving a bittersweet feeling on your whole body.
“it is.” you looked over your shoulder, to see your boyfriend, riki fiddling with his yearbook. his fingers spotted towards the back of the book, heartfelt messages and inspiring words that his friends wrote for him.
you’re in riki’s backyard, inside of a treehouse both of you built since children with the help of your parents. you’re so lucky your dad is a constructor.
riki is sitting, one leg sticking out and one knee bent as he leans into the wooden walls. this position allows you to admire him from below as the sunlight flashes on his beautiful features.
he’s reading every single message with sincerity and care, from his senior friends that he will probably never see again and his younger juniors that he can’t annoy anymore.
“i can’t believe we’re gonna be college students now. where we have to pay off debts, start our career paths, those people who are gonna be closer to 20 than 16 - it’s just,” you took in a breath. “surreal. surreal that we are growing up.”
you had always had a fear of growing up. not wanting to achieve the things and goals you’ve planned on time. you felt like you’re rushing to do everything at once before it becomes too late. you always wanna stay 16 forever; forever naive to understand the real world. how you’re closest friends will separate from you. how everything you’re experiencing right now will be just a memory.
riki glanced down on you where you’re staring off of space. he can sense the anxiety in your tone.
he closes the book after he was staring at a picture. a picture titled, “best couple” and it’s a picture of the both of you standing next to each other, smiling widely. he scooted himself, making himself comfortable once he lays down next to you. his back lays flat, mimicking your position.
“are you scared?” riki likes to question the obvious, but it helps you reflect on your feelings; how fear is just a feeling.
“just a little anxious just all,” you confessed, looking at riki whose eyes never left yours. “i’m sure it will disappear soon. i mean, everyone experiences this.” you reassure yourself and riki sense it.
“mhm,” riki mumbles. “it’s okay to feel anxious, the future is scary.” he looks down. “it’s only a matter of time how you’re gonna handle it. you create your own future.”
his words ring in your head. he’s right.
riki took your silence as a way that you agree with him.
he then glanced down towards your arm, a black-inked drawing that attracted him. riki scooted closer, his body turned to yours. he propped himself up with his elbow.
no matter how close the proximity is between the both of you, it still makes you nervous til this day. especially with how much older and mature-looking your boyfriend of 6 years is.
“your parents aren’t mad about this?” riki gently poked on your arm, eyes analyzing the beauty that you’ve decided to put on your arm.
it’s beautiful, he thinks.
“not anymore, i’m 18 now.” you huffed out. you remembered the horror on your parents’ faces but a sigh of defeat when they realized you’re now responsible of yourself. it makes you chuckle their panicked expressions, but it made them realize that you’re not gonna be their little 4 year old reckless daughter anymore.
“i can imagine your mom shrieking.” riki giggled which made you scoffed because he wasn’t wrong.
“your birth flower?” riki asked, his fingertips gently tracing the traces of your birth flower.
your eyes widened a bit at his sudden touch then you looked down at how focused riki was. his eyes were staring at it as if your tattoo was a museum.
your heart beat quickened at the sight.
“the flower that i drew for you in your math notebook in 6th grade.” riki smiled, realizing how much time flies since you guys called it official since middle school. you’ve remembered the nervousness riki’s hands were fiddling when he made a bouquet of origami flowers that he made each week that he fell in love with you. you thought it was silly. riki has always been caring and kind to you so it was natural for you to reprociate the feelings back.
“i thought you threw your old notebooks away..” his voice still remains soft and delicate, still smiling at your tattoo.
“i ripped the page and kept it since.” when you were going into your freshman self, you looked back into the notebooks to reminsince your middle school memories. you’ve came across a drawing — no other than riki’s in your notebook. you ripped it out and hid it in a safe spot until you get a tattoo of it ever since.
some people thought you guys weren’t gonna make it past middle school — even you too, but since both of you got in the same highschool, it is still strong. a strong string holding your relationship tight. yes, with hormones acting up and puberty getting in the way, there were times where you guys had fought and argued together to the point it was nearing breaking apart but both of you shouldn’t let it slide. not when it has reached this far.
although your boyfriend has grown up, there are occasionally times where he teases you and becomes childish around you, it makes you reminsince how he still has a soul of his 12-year old self. especially moments where he look similar to a duck, which made you think about how much duck plushies you have on your bed because it reminds you of riki.
you’re happy that you’re growing up with him.
“a penny for your thoughts?”
you gasped lightly, realizing that you’re spacing out. you looked at him and you see a small smirk implemented on his face, curious of what your pretty head is thinking of.
your face relaxes, trying to calm yourself. you’re nervous over nothing.
you looked down at your hands, then glance at riki’s hand comfortably resting, then back to your hands. your fingers slowly creep upon riki’s fingers, slowly rubbing them with yours. you smiled at the sight.
“it’s insane to think about how much we’ve grown.” you paused. “together.”
riki’s eyes looked at the sight, his heart beat echoing and growing louder. no matter what you do, you always make him think irrational. he then glances at you smiling when you’re playing with his fingers. “not many people believed in us lasting this long, not even me. i was worried if one of us lost feelings, found someone else better, or get something in our way, but im glad that we didn’t give up.” you looked at riki where his attention was diverted to you. he raised an eyebrow to indicate that he was listening.
“i’m happy that i’m dating you, i can’t express how much i adore you, how much you mean to me, i’ve never felt love this strong before — you’re just everything to me. i can’t imagine laughing harder than with anyone else, smile so much with anyone else. with you, it’s different. thank you for loving me.”
you’re cringing on the inside at how much you confessed in such a short amount of time. you’re met with silence from your boyfriend who seem atonished from your words. you’re embarrassed, pulling back your fingers to cover your blushing cheeks in front of your boyfriend.
riki’s lips twitched, happy for you to express your feelings more comfortably now compared to the past situations. (one of the reasons that you’ve guys argued before) his chest felt light, his grin becoming bigger when you’re hiding from him.
you hear the blankets rustled, you felt riki’s arm slowly snake around your arm to remove your hand from your face. you removed your embarrassed hands and your eyes followed his hand clasping onto yours. the sight of his veiny hands makes you silent.
you admire the two of you holding hands. your stomach was feeling butterflies just as it was the first time riki confessed his feelings to you. riki twists your wrist, allowing you to see the sight from all angles. it looks so perfect. your hand perfectly structured to hold his.
“you’re just as perfect as to what i am seeing right now.” riki spoke with a soft tone, chuckling when he kept twisting and turning your wrist. “you have a place in my heart no one else could ever have. my heart is so full of you i can hardly call it my own. i choose you. and i’ll choose you over and over. without a pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat, i’ll keep choosing you. as long as i’m alive, you will always be loved.”
you’re speechless at your boyfriend’s words to the point you feel like crying. riki still kept smiling at you, giggling. you saw the crescents formed in his eyes whenever he smiled at you and it never fails to make yourself love him more.
riki took this opportunity to lift himself up, hovering above you. he pecked your forehead. you felt his warm lips touching your skin and the goosebumps always forms whenever he makes you flustered.
you looked up at him, surprised. he looked down at you with his head tilted and a scrunched nose like a puppy, as if he was proud to do that.
nothing but an exchange of loud heart beats matching with one another and genuine giggles back and forth.
riki then leaned in towards you. you closed your eyes at the expected action. his lips touching with yours. electricity flows when he rubs his fingers on your hands. it always make you feel all tingly on the inside.
riki then pulls back, “cute.” he teases you, making your cheeks grow hotter. “shut up.” you rolled eyes, earning a little laugh from him.
riki still doesn’t let go of your intertwined hands as he returns to his original position where you’re laying flat on the ground, shoulder to shoulder.
“so your summer plans?” riki asked casually. he lifted his head as his arm was under his head to act as support.
you then touched your bangs, realizing that you still have that caramel-like highlights since march. you were starting to get bored of it.
you pursed your lips. “maybe dye my hair next week back to black.”
riki’s eyes shined. “match with me.” he spoke without thinking. you turned your head to him, realizing that his hair is black now.
your boyfriend likes it alot when both of you match.
“if you bleach it next month to some color then what?” you pointed out because sometimes your boyfriend makes impulsive decisions on his hair whenever he sees a cool hairstyles. you’re not angry whenever he does this because he’s good looking with whatever hair color he has.
“i won’t bleach it, i promise. i’ll follow you.” riki spoke and it makes you chuckle that he probably doesn’t realize the importance of his words. “red? blue? silver, i’ll do it for you.” you froze at his sudden deep voice erupting from him. your heart beat also freezes when his lips touches the location of your tattoo. you looked down and see his lips pushed forward. your heart flutters once again.
“you’re dumb.” you spoke, eyes softening at what you were hearing.
gosh, you really love this man.
riki smiles against your skin, looking up and your heart twists at an umfamiliar sight. “i can be that.”