I’m Suffering From Penis Pride

Guyssss so I had a dream where I took a shit, and today I took a shit that looked just like my dream shit. Like I can not make this shit up, except for the shit I made up, in my dream, cus I did make that shit up in my brain🧠🤯😱

Before poop: 118lb

After poop: 116lb

There is no way I just shit 2 pounds

Fat chucky cheese = chunky cheese

If I was a postman.

I’d post your nudes online.

- Emmer

Working in food has made me realize how many people will come into a restaurant like 2 mins before it closes and order a full meal. Like gurl my drawer is already gone, the people in the kitchen have taken all their utensils to dish, almost all the food is sold out. And they will get SO PISSED about this like lady in the time it took to have this conversation we've literally closed 😊😃

resident evil 4. Opionions?

Good 😊👍

Not to brag but I have no hair ;)

shaved heads are so sexy. i can invite you into my living space and you won't shed hair everywhere, baby that's hot

Hey my little Scooby snacks, I sorta forgot this app existed 😊

When ever you are feeling unimportant just remember…….

It only takes one person to stop traffic :)

Just hit 23 followers (the same number as flavors in doctor pepper) :D

I just wanna say thanks to all the people who aren’t my sisters and friends.

So this one’s to the 20 segs bots that made this possible.