૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 10

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 15

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

➁ Plain black coffee 200ml - 0 cal

➀ Green apple - 78 cal

➀ Boiled egg - 72 cal

Water - 1.5l/2l

Full - 150 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 10391/10000 - 419 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 419 cal

❗️🔮reblog this miraculous pumpkin and you will be granted with their grace to lose 15-20 lbs till halloween🔮❗️

I gained 1kg back in two days even tho I barely ate. Time to fast it down and more 💕✨️

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ NOVEMBER 1-2

The last week was shitty in terms of starving myself. I plateaued at 73 and I haven't been gaining which is nice, but I haven't been losing either.

Because of the holidays, birthdays and other events I couldn't avoid eating normal amounts but sadly I have been craving things I haven't craved in a long time and it's making me crazy.

For example I really don't like white bread, yet I broke my 72 hour fast after the 27th hour because I had this instant need for it. I looked at the slice, conteplated only a little and bit into it. It was such a big slice too. I knew I can't eat it, that I shouldn't eat it, yet I still did.

Fucking other weight losing tactics haven't worked on me before only starving myself did. Only restricting my calorie intake to 800-400-200 did. What am I supposed to do? Stop because I failed even at something so simple like not fucking stuffing my mouth?

I even ate KFC like a pig. Ate the grander and the twist thing then drank the pumpkin spice shake. I knew I shouldn't but I couldn't stop. The craving and the hunger for it was too much.

God I wanna cry. I wanna tear everything out. They were so good, but for how long? Until I finished watching a moist critical video, which was 10 minutes long.

Why can't I wait? Why can't I control it? I hate it so much.

I hate food. I don't want it anymore.

૮ฅ・ﻌ・აฅ OCTOBER 24 + WEEK SUMMARY

I was so absent gah daym. I binge watched trigun again then watched trigun stampede and grrr the brainrot was so real and strong (curse you knives for being so crazy and yet so appealing for my brain) and quite honestly I just didn't bother to write logs.

The whole week been really chill, mostly spent my time at home mainly because I got kinda ill...for a day lmao. After that I was just kinda tired all day so I stayed in bed, only woke up to do my nails, which took me 4 days btw because Im not a professional and I wanted it to be perfect.

So yes, I only logged my food down in the tracker and wasted away. Makes me kinda sad, kinda guilty but at the same time it is what it is.

AlsonI noticed that now it's not as hot and warm outside so my body doesn't "crave" water so I forget to drink and that's not good. It makes me hungry and bored so I often catch myself wandering in the kitchen, opening and closing the fridge door to see if my stomach wants anything other than meat, veggies and fruits. Not too big on eating carbohydrates and if I can I will avoid it even tho my body supposedly needs it. (I was a hypocrite today tho I craved rice and gave)

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➁ Plain black coffee 200ml - 0 cal

➀ Pickwick green tea (lemon) 350ml - 0 cal

➁ Green apples 287g - 166 cal

➁ Eggs 106g - 152 cal

➁ Bowl of Basmati rice with tuna, corn and broccoli - 700 cal

Water - 1.6l/2l

Full - 1018 cal

✧ ° ｡ʚ 🍓 ɞ ｡° ✧

Steps - 10217/10000 - 410 cal

Exercise - No - 0 cal

Burned - 420 cal

me to me:

don’t you dare fucking quit! You’re literally almost there!! You got what 4 more hours left in your fast?? Don’t be a chicken shit and just do it!!! Do stop don’t stop don’t stop!!! You gotta fucking want it!!! You don’t wanna keep going?? Then why the fuck did you start to begin with?! Push like you fucking mean it!! Don’t you dare eat that!! Just a few more hours don’t wuss out!

You coward!!

What the hell noone told me losing weight is so addictive. I can already feel my hipbone and ribs so much????

Aaa i am so bad at blogging damn. I have been neglecting my tumblr so much im sorry :((

I don't like vanilla cherry diet coke but I feel like I need it, because it would probably prevent me from eating.

I was "fasting" all day but ate at night when I came home so it feels like I cheated. 12 hours basically out of the window.

I don't understand why I can't stop myself. Not too long ago was so easy.

U don't have to change everything just the things that matter lol