I Need To Have An It/its Weekend

being reckless and young is not how the damage got done!!!

i don’t think we talk about the way frank utilizes costume, and specifically uniforms, enough. white pants and shirts with sharpied ø’s, the death spells striped sweaters, white standard low wage “salaryman” looks with black ties, the boiler suits, the scrubs, the hospital gown. that frank has always emphasized that he liked “bands that look like a band,” that he stated the jumpsuits were a kind of mindset, that they wore them to understand themselves as technicians, that they would go to work and work on their craft, it was a type of dedication to their artistry. that frank tends to lean towards blue collar workers, towards the unglamorous reality of everyday healthcare workers, towards the unglamorous reality of being one of their patients. that when frank wears white, there’s nothing to hide. all the dirt, all the filth, all the sweat, all the blood, his vulnerability will always be visible, apparent. i think there’s something so important there in his solo work, not only with the content of his music, but that he spent so long dressed in black, dressed in red, in colors that absorb all the filth because they needed to be bulletproof. but that frank chose white as a common thread amongst his solo work, that he would force us to confront all of it there on that canvas, all the blood in joyriding, all the confetti and cake and glitter in great party, all the filth from on stage, all the sweat and dedication, that in a way he made himself a canvas for all that passion and all the scuffs along the way.

we DO grow old and happy. btw.

sciles season 5 breakup is soooo much it got me barking in 2025. neither of them are talking to the person in front of them! scott is talking to the person he thought he trusted most, the person who knew him better than his own mother when his life turned upside down and never quite righted itself again, the person who was there for him when he feared he may have killed someone, the person who scott's just been led to believe killed in cold blood and hid it from him, and suddenly the chilling of their dynamic can make sense, because if scott doesn't believe theo's explanation, what does that leave to explain the creeping distance between them? what's left? scott is talking to this person in an attempt to give him the benefit of the doubt despite fearing he already knows all he needs to; which is that stiles didn't trust him with this, which means he either doesn't trust scott anymore, what did scott do to make stiles not trust him anymore, or it must have been Bad, or both. it means scott's one safe place to land in this world where violence has become normalized, even and often from friendly faces, even his own father, is no longer the same safe place it had remained throughout all of it, through the worst moments of his life and before, he always had stiles. even when his mom choked on what he'd become, stiles didn't. and now stiles either doesn't trust him anymore or isn't safe anymore.

and stiles does the worst possible thing and defends the supposed violence out the gate! because he's talking to the person he's put on this pedestal, this person who he's watched up close grow from his best friend to a werewolf that could kill him in his sleep to the guy who's saved not only his life but so many others, including the most important person in his life; his dad, over and over again, he's seen scott do the impossible, and then some; even the things they grew up not knowing existed now bend for scott mccall, who no longer has asthma, who's good at lacrosse, who can get shot and stabbed and walk it off while stiles can barely keep up, and the one thing stiles has never seen him do is kill someone. stiles, who checked himself into eichen because he was afraid the thing under his skin would kill someone, and then it did, right in scott's arms, when stiles knows scott had his own version of the same thing, watched him struggle with it, watched him hurt himself just to stop and still never succumbed. true alpha scott mccall. even the laws of nature and unnature know how good he is. stiles watched the same world that tried to eat his best friend whole bow before him, and he watched people who never knew scott before they knew the werewolf look at him like he was their savior, and he didn't mean to start seeing him that way too and he doesn't know when he started to, but he did. he does, and he thinks there's no way, No Way someone like that sticks with someone who looked at a teenager turned killer in their death throes and thought about twisting the knife, self defense or no.

both of them are primed to face the worst versions of the situation and what that means for them going forward; the versions this new world has threatened to warp them into despite knowing each other before they entered it. that world swallowed them down so far they don't see each other anymore! they're ready and waiting to have their worst fears confirmed and in that fear they do the exact things to confirm it to each other!

what's more is that scott forgives countless people who've killed in cold blood and otherwise throughout the show. he has allies who've killed people when they didn't have to, when they did, allies who'd killed werewolves whether they needed to or not. hell, he allies his pack with theo a season later, the guy who fucking killed him. stiles has no reason to think scott would suddenly kick him to the curb for something like this other than projecting his own feelings of condemnation onto the pinnacle of morality in his life. the issue isn't the violence, it's the idea of stiles perpetrating it. scott has plenty of people in his life he's overlooked violence for, including his very own father, he just never thought stiles would be one of them. could be. and neither did stiles! and that shift in their dynamic scares them so much they're already mourning the loss when it's not even gone, just different. changed, like everything else in their godawful lives. they were the only thing left that hadn't, and in fearing for this loss they only doomed themselves to losing more.

reaching the point of hyperfixation where I can no longer engage with it due to the nausea that I experience at the mere thought of seeing it on my screen is the closest I’ve ever been to being diagnosed with female hysteria

Teen Wolf Ship of the Day, January 2nd

Allison Argent x Lydia Martin

Allison loves the way that Lydia looks at her. She even loves how every so often they are yanked out of bed by a scream and the two of them grab what's needed and go looking for a dead body.

Headcanons under the cut

Allison can't/doesn't drive and Lydia drives her everywhere

Allison does archery with a group and Lydia loves to watch her girl do her sport in a non-life-or-death environment

They ice skate and Lydia absolutely skates circles around Allison

Lydia has a list of date ideas and they go on a date once a week

Lydia and Allison are an incredible team, with Allison's weapons and Lydia's scream. They absolutely solve so many crimes

They both love rainy weather and puddles and jumping around in them. Both of them are working on embracing a more childlike mentality every once in a while

They spend a lot of time together but have hobbies apart from each other because Lydia thinks its probably healthiest for them

For their birthday's each year Allison and Lydia give each other stuffed animals

Allison has been trying to read more fantasy and has gotten really into Brandon Sanderson while Lydia is more of a Terry Pratchett reader

They are looking into getting a cat, names on the roster are; Garlic Bread; Nosferatu; Jimmy Jorts; Lord Tuffington; and Sylvester Tom III

Don’t think about the fact that’s it’s implied stiles has his mother’s eyes. That every time he looks himself in the mirror he sees her eyes looking back at him. That when he looks at himself with deep hatred he sees his mother calling him a monster. He sees her eyes as she tries to kill him. Somedays that’s all he can see. So he avoids looking at himself in the mirror.

Don’t think about seeing void with his mother eyes, eyes that once again hold violence.

Don’t think about stiles holding head in hands. Thinking that the only thing his body has left of his mother is his eyes. That maybe if he gets rid of them, then his father would be able to look at him again.

Slowly digging his nails through the skin above his eyes. Thinking about gouging his eyes out and giving them to his dad. But not being able to do it but using the action to ground himself. Repeating it again and again and again over the years. Leaving scars just above his eyes to give him something else to look at. Something else to see that isn’t his mother’s hatred looking back at him.

Don’t think about his father falling into alcoholism. Tiny 8 year old stiles thinking that his father is grieving, and so he drinks that night. And the night after that and the next. And the drinking isn’t stopping but instead becoming more frequent. Don’t think about stiles holding onto hope that his father might tuck him into bed instead of reaching for the bottle. Stiles picking up whiskeys from the floor with the same colour of his eyes. Don’t think about the moment stiles realizes that his father is trying to drown himself in hopes of reaching Claudia at the bottom. The moment when he has to come to terms with the fact that he might lose both of his parents.

Destiel is so good bc its love as corruption and love as salvation at the same time for both of them. Dean is corrupting cas he's making him feel emotions hes making him feel doubt he's leading him astray from the heavenly purpose he's had for millions of years but dean is saving cas, he's teaching him love and empathy and free will even if its in his incredibly flawed, human way. Cas is corrupting dean he's threatening to crack the facade dean has worked so hard to construct he betrays dean he leaves him he makes him confront things about himself he never wanted to. But he's also saving dean, he sees the good in him when dean himself cannot, he softens him and makes him laugh and he literally rebuilt deans soul and gave him something new to believe in. They ruin eachother and yet they saved each other from what they both almost became.