Ok, I'm About To Take You Up On That Offer Again: Sniper X Masculine, Slightly Stoic Reader, Once Again

Hello bestie

sniper MARRIAGE headcanons?????

¿por favor 🥺?

[*sigh* How could I NOT do it 🤌]

TF2 Sniper x Reader Marriage headcanons [romantic]:

> Marriage is important thing. It shows how two people love and trust each other deeply, caring about another, knowing their partner, loving them for perfections and imperfections. And it was something Sniper value.

> For Sniper marriage is a HUGE step. You'd have to date him for... 5-6 years to even think about something like that. Luckily for you, you are someone special for Sniper, who was happiest man on earth when wedding happend

> At first he would be kinda nervous, maybe even anxious about it. It is a huge step after all, and he didn't wanted to fall into canyon making it. He might even regret it. Not that he doesn't love you, but in a way that something might change, and he prefers when things...stay the same.

> He is going to wake up before you do, occasionally make you something before he heads over to work. It won't be anything fancy, nah. Something easy, simple and fast to make, but he puts a lot of work into it, he cooks you something that is probably much better than 5 minute microwave garbage.

> He plans a date for your once a month, to spend proper time with you alone, far away from people. He just wants to be with you and only you.

> He will be much more comfortable with taking his clothes off around you, and show you his scars. Around you he feels....free and With you, he doesn't have to look behind his back every second, he doesn't have to be fully focused, stressed all the time. With you, he can lie back on the bed, close his eyes and relax

> You two gonna have your own inside joke or tradition, like you taking his hat so he has to kiss you to get it back

> Low voice sneak attacks! Oh he knowsss you love his voice. If you are doing anything, from cleaning to reading a book, he will lean over your shoulder and in a quiet voice tell you about his day. It feels more personal to him when he can tell you about his thoughts when he is this close to you

> Nicknames my dear, you wil gain more of them for sure!

> People told him how his smile is "creppy" or "weird" , it's a reason why he doesn't smile to people with his teeth, but around you, he just can't help but but to turn his frown upside down

> This man would fucking die for you or throw himself at a crocodile with nothing more than a razor blade and a piece of chicken. He wants you to feel safe around him, knowing that no matter what happens he will be with you.... while aiming a sniper rifle at anyone who even breaths at you wrong.

> He observed his parents when he was little, he watched how they laughe, argue, scream, cry and love each other for many years. He sometimes thought what would it be like to be someone's someone, now he does... thanks to you.

Ello! Been a bit anyway I have a question for you what’s your favorite animal? 🦔

Hello! Good to see ya back!

I have 2 favourite animals, sorry but I couldn't pick just one 😅

It will be definitely Lynx and Collared Dove!

Lynx: I love them! Beautiful wild cats that has even their own constalation in the sky! They avoid humans sure, but can be defensive around their young ones. And Lynx isn't small either! They aren't your typical house cats, they can be just a large as dogs or even bigger! And their ears! Come on, how can't I not love them :]

Collared Dove: They are my childhood birds. Always hear them sing outside my window early in the morning. They have beautiful unique appearance, and are really stealthy. When I go on a bike in my village or just to the forest I love spotting them and watch how they fly or just sit. Their light color scheme is what draws me to them, they aren't like the pigeons from the city, they are calm and sneaky and majestic. Long story short those birds are part of my inner child

WE ARE SO BACK! ✨️✨️✨️

The 7th comic Is In The Works!

Those aren't just rumors, btw!

Watch the whole video 👌

ASS PANCAKES MY BELOVED 💙

Hi! Can I I request an x reader with ass pancakes that takes place during the 7 year time skip like in the comic after moving on from being a mercenary? : )

Hello!! This is my first request so I’m very excited!! I made this Romantic/Platonic since I wasn’t entirely sure, hope you like it!!

ASS PANCAKES X READER AFTER 7 YEARS

In my head, the story of Freak Fortress goes differently than the canon comics. They were an outlier team, a team of weirdos with unrelenting abilities, while there was the Team Fortress 2 classic team we all know, they rarely faced off with Freak Fortress. You were apart of this team, one of the few who was close to normal. They would all have retire at some point, but I feel like they would still go about their merry way and continue wrecking havoc. 

-Ass Pancakes had a fondness for you he never showed. Maybe it was because he felt bad that you did not have unfair powers given by whatever force of nature gave the entire Freak Fortress theirs. He always BONKED! the enemy team member that shot you. Going absolutely overkill and then looking blankly at you. Once you have a nervous smile, he grinned ear to ear before saying “See ya!” and jumping away. 

-(Romantic/Platonic) Speaking of, he would always übercharge himself with Bonk! to protect you from speeding bullets. This gave you the chance to run to cover and reload your gun. You would hide in the corner of a two-story with supply caches. Ready to run and your safety off, he would push you back down. Once you saw who it was, you lowered your gun. He look at you with that same, crazy eyed smile and said, “I Bonked! them all.”  So much for reloading.

-You two ended up living in a small, dingy apartment on the outskirts of Teufort. A sketchy area, which made sense, considering Ass Pancakes was now your roommate after being your co-worker/good friend (mainly so no one else bothered you). 

-I honestly do not see him changing much, aside from being a little more calm. Down the line, he started to do “side jobs” with the other former mercenaries that are exactly what you think they are. He would leave and come back like he had a regular job, but you knew what he was doing. And you did not want to see it.

-Any canned drink you have, he will take the opportunity to scare you. Imagine you’re reading a book and you move your hand to grab the can of pop you opened and suddenly feeling dry skin. You would jump, of course, and he would jump out of the can in front of you. It’s something he has been doing since he met you.

-(Romantic) He would always shake you by your shoulders before kissing you. It’s his thing! Speaking of kissing, he will always appear right in front of you upside down and face to face, and ask for a kiss, pointing at his lips, and once you gave it to him, he disappeared. You don’t even know how he was upside down, the ceiling was too high. 

-Your apartment is mostly your space. I feel like Ass Pancakes only owns the Warhammer of Zillyhoo and the many cans of Bonk! that fill your fridge. He lets you decorate however you want. However, he will come up to them, look for a moment and then ask, “You did this?” And then after you say yes, he grabs your shoulders, does his wide grin and yells “I love it!”. Do be warned about the carpet, he will leave bloodstains. 

-His hair, like canon Scout’s, has gotten longer and I like to think his leg muscles are very tense from all of the running around and jumping he’s done. 

-He watches you sleep since he doesn’t sleep. You two end up spending the night on the couch rather than your own bed (He doesn’t have one). You either wake up to wide eyes staring at you or him eating your food. 

-(Romantic/Platonic) If you cuddle on his chest, his regular heart rate is above average due to how much Bonk he drinks. He also pats your head rather than rub your head or run his hands through your hair. He’s gotten a lot calmer, but he does not understand social cues. 

Oh my- there is more of you than I expected!

I am going to do it after I answer request that was in my askbox for a long time

Whoever send it sorry it took me this long 😭😅🙏

Look at that.

TF 7th comic made me cry of joy so bad I came back here to write fanfic about reader joining the family

So- anyone interested in more Reader who visited on Smissmas story expansion?

My idea: Since we have 7 years time skip and Scout talks to "us" as good friends oh his that stuck around... I think I can work with that. So, anyone here interested?

It 5 am. I couldn't sleep. I was awake all night. My chest hurt, i felt my heart stopping and my chest filling up with anxiety as I was laying down. That's all i did. I was just closing my eyes ready to sleep when suddenly, hole in my chest, weird pinching. It was like panic attack but....for no reason. I haven't watched anything scary or sad before going to sleep. Just reading some fluff and then....it happend. I realized i forgot my medicine. I take it once a month, a pill that helps me regulate well- that. Weird........

I don't even know what to call it. Anxiety attacks? Panic attacks? Heart attacks? At this point....I don't know. It's like a black hole just showing up in my chest....I walk around my house to me it go away. I walked for 2 hours. Nothing. So i watched funny videos to take my attention off of it. Helped a bit. Still felt...tried. I again walked around, another hour. 2 rooms and corridor. My room, corridor and bathroom over and over. Just....walking to feel calmer. Even now i don't lay down. I just sit up and try to listen to birds that started to chirp outside. Yes it's that early. Almost 6 am. I wanted to make a fnaf joke, that i survived the night heh. Stil.... I hate when it happends. Guess that all those worries needs to come out after all. My hand shakes. The left one only. Right one is just tried. I want to lay down and try fall asleep again. My chest still squeezes. Eh. It's literally almost 6 am guys it's a post i will probably delete so...just letting know i feel not okey. Not like i am dying just.... I wish it just stopped and let me rest.

Hello! I saw your posters and they are awesome! Are you making ones with BLU team as well?

HOW DID I NOT SEE THIS????

Thank you so much!! I’m planning on making some strictly BLU team posters, but I do have a couple under the cut already made with some BLU members :] I just like the color red

My Blue Blood

Science Party

Blu Spy is in the back!!

He’s blue; IT COUNTS I SWEAR

My oc Vernon

Femswap

Yip yap yap yap yip

bad eyesight (Sniper)

ok so my friend (who doesn’t know tf2 at all) saw a picture of Sniper and said to me “hey his sunglasses are prescription! they fade in the dark” and i can’t get over it. so now im obsessed with bad eyesight Sniper. anyway here’s some headcanons then

SO EMBARRASSED ABOUT HIS POOR EYESIGHT. Sniper was so embarrassed about needing glasses that he got prescription sunglasses so nobody would know.

he tried on regular glasses, but he thought that they made him look so nerdy he threw them off and didn’t look back.

the only person who knows about his poor eyesight (other than his parents), is Spy. Spy had thieved the marksman’s sunglasses to inspect them, and noticed the extremely thick lenses of them.

enenebrbbrbrbejwkwowpnrnrrb poor eyesight Sniper

Okay, so me and my friend enjoy your writing, and on behalf of my friend I was suppose to ask if it was possible to do like a sniper x spy or heavy x medic. But we understand if you can't so you can just pick one of the mercs and do it x gender fluid reader.

Also, from both of us, don't overwork yourself to burn out.

[Yoo! Thank you so much for this request! I'm glad you and your friend like my writing and my art! And thank you I will take breaks! Again thank you for liking what I'm doing! It means a lot! Have a nice reading!💀💙]

Birds, Bears and blood

Team Fortress 2 story

> TF2 Heavy x Medic

> unexpected additional merc appearance

> gore and blood. Like- a lot.

The day started surprisingly calm. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and as usual, Pyro was trying to set their room on fire. Heavy and Medic were sitting together in the common room. Heavy was reading his book while the Medic calmly rested his head on his lap. Ah. What a peaceful day it is. And nothing will-

RING RING

...nevermind. Medic stood up, Heavy put his book away, and picked up the phone.

"Hello?-"

"Heavy! Thank god! Finally someone picked up! I was calling Spy, Pyro, Sniper- heck even Scout!None of them answered the phone. Listen, I have important job for you"

"A job huh. Continue, Heavy is listening"

"Alright. Phew- so. Tonight there is a ball organized in tribute to the death of Tom Jones by his fans. One of those fans is Blutarch's new investors. All you need to know about them is that they want to use Tom Jones' death as an advantage to manipulate their fans and believe me when I say his fans are capable of taking over the word for him, that's why the Administrator wants them gone. So? What are you saying?"

"Hm. Heavy is not sure if he can do it alone..."

"Can I make a suggestion?" Medic moved closer to the phone, with his hand on the Heavy's shoulder.

"I might have overhead the conversation anddd I'll gladly volunteer to go with the Heavy. This will be a great opportunity for me to gain new limbs on the way back!”

"Well...if Heavy has nothing against it-"

"Doctor can go."

"Alright! I will send you details soon. See you soon guys"

Heavy looked at Medic as he put the phone away.

"Getting a new limbs? Doctor could make a better excuse just to go out with me"

Medic smirked.

"Oh come on Misha, It was a good professional excuse. Besides you know I need extra set of limbs after Socut drove van with my supplies into the river"

Heavy chukled as he shook his head.

"Fine fine. Prepare yourself Doc. From what I hear this mission will be hard and ridiculous"

Two hours later, Heavy and Medic arrived at the ball. Everyone were wearing Tom Jones clothes, and so were they.

"This makes our work difficult. Miss Pauling didn't give us much of a description of BLU's investors, only thing that we know is that they will wear blue hats"

"We will find zhem, don't you worry. We know they plan to convince everyone during their big speech. We still have some time for ourselves"

"We need to remember this is still a mission..."

"Alright alright. But later you owe me a dance"

After a while, everyone gathered around the large stage. Heavy and Medic remained to the side. Four people approach him and put on blue bowler hats. This is when Medic and Heavy were ready to get behindthe stange, but someone unexpected aproched them.

"Hey there fellas! Whatcha doin' here?"

"Scout? What are you doing here?" Medic asked.

"It's a Tom Jones memorial party, how I could I not go? But you still didn't answer my question"

"We are here to shoot those four little baby man but we need to-"

"I got it!" Scout took his pistol out and with two quick shoots, he manage to shoot one of the BLU investors.

" ...-quietly." Heavy sighed as people began to panic and scream, running away.

"GUARDS!" One of the investors shouted. Soon guards in blue uniforms started to surround them.

"Uhh. Sorry fellas"

"Keep your cheep apology to yourself"

"Wait. I recognise you three! You work for RED! Lock them up!"

One of the guards approached Medic, but Heavy pushed them away with one powerful blow. Another decided to shoot the Heavy in the head, but Medic took out a bone saw and in the last second he stabbed them in the chest. That's when the radio started playing the biggest and best masterpiece Tom Jones had ever created.

"Misha, remember? You owe me a dance."

Heavy smirked and cracked his knuckles.

"Let's dance then Doc."

Soon Heavy and Medic together started to beat the hell out of people. Blood was everywhere. When someone was trying to attack, they only meet their doom. What a dance! Limbs were thrown around everywhere, as both of them started at each other with wide smiles, holding hands, knowing they have each others back.

Scout was there too I guess.

The investors saw this and started to run away, but Heavy and Medic chased after them. They manage to get one of them, killing him quickly, leaving only two. They ran after them to the roof, Medic was faster than Heavy, so he quickly caught up with them. He started fighting with one of them, but he shooting him in the shoulder, the Medic reacted quickly, cutting off his arm. They both rolled to the edge, almost falling, but Medic kicked him in the chest, causing his target to fall off the roof. The last one was left. At that moment, a helicopter appeared and took the investors away.

"Haha! You won't get me now-"

This when he noticed that his transport isn't moving. He looked down to noticed Heavy holding on helicopter, preventing it from flying away. Medic quickly throw his bonesaw at pilot, cutting his head off. Heavy finally let helicopter go, without a pilot, it started to fly high up, shaking left and right. Investor couldn't hold on long enough, so he jumped out with his parachute. Everything would be great untill helicopter started to fall down and t cut him into pieces with his propeller. Heavy covered Medic when it fall down next to them.

Soon both of them looked at each other, covered in blood.

"Well. This isn't the worst date we been on" Medic joked. Heavy giggled and picked Medic up.

"Are you alright? Your shoulder-"

"I'm fine. How about you?" Medic put his hand on Heavy's cheek.

Both of them smiled and soon kissed, with happiness knowing their partner is alright. Heavy gently hold Ludwigs hand, smiling. Medic put his head on Mishs's chest chuckling.

This is when Scout run up, and stared at them with eyes wide open.

"What the hell happened in here?!"

Medic and Heavy looked at him, rolling their eyes.

"Nothing. We finished the mission" Heavy replied.

"Now Scout, since you are here, help me collect the least damaged limbs and put them into my truck! Just remember you won't drive it this time!"

"Ughhh. Why do I always get the grossest part of work." Scout said while doing down the stairs.

They finally returned to base, Medic and Heavy were rewarded, while Scout had to explain everything to Miss Pauling. Both of the layed down on couch, resting close to each other.

"You know what? It wasn't that bad"

"Yes. But Misha promises the Doctor that next time we will spend the evening in a more peaceful way"

Medic smiled and layed his head back on Heavy's lap.

"I know we will, meain libieling"

They both lay down close to each other, glad they can finally rest in peace. Together...

[Anddd there you go! Hope you liked it! I'm not into shipping mercs too much but I hope you enjoyed this story!💀🌌]

Hi...

Scout x reader, if it's not to much of a problem?

-Tavern

[*cracks knuckles* I got ya. I am so sorry this took that long!!💀"']

Hard to ask

◇ TF2 Scout x reader [crush]

Your day started with a lot of work. You had to deliver some boxes to Medic, full of new organs of exotic animals. You walked through long corridor whenever suddenly you heard voices from behind the door.

"Are you sure? You did make sure to get this specific one, right?" It was Scout's voice.

"Yes, I did. I had to. Otherwise, you wouldn't leave me alone." Another voice replied. It belonged to...Spy?

You pressed you head to the door, trying to catch more of this conversation. It wasn't common for Spy and Scout to talk outside of work, so you were a bit curious about what those two are up to.

"Now my payment." said Spy.

"Okey okey, fine. And remember, don't tell anyone about this!" Scout replied.

"I promise I won't. It's not like this is the best keept secret in the base"

"Oh fuck you. Just leave" Scout said annoyed by Spy's attitude.

You quickly backed away from the door before they were opened by Spy. He stopped when he noticed you, standing still in the corridor, holding two cardboard boxesat. You thought he is going to be angry or start to ask questions, but to your surprise, he just smirked and walked away without saying anything. Scout walked out from his room, shouting at Spy's back.

"Yea, that's right! Leave and AH-" Scout screamed when he noticed you, standing behind him and jumped up in the air like a scared cat.

"Oh! What are you- i mean- what are you doing here?" he quickly changed his pose from scaredy-cat to confident in a second. Of course, he leaned against the wall to look cooler for you.

"Me? I uhhh- I was just simply passing by with some boxes I need to deliverto Medic" you said calmly.

"I seeeee" he answered as calmly as he could.

"I can't help but ask ... what Spy was doing in your room?"

You noticed that Scout on these words immediately started to sweat and move his hands chaotically left and right, to find comfortable position before crossing them on his chest.

"N-Nothin', just uhhhh we were talking about... work!"

"Work?" You asked with suspicious look.

"Uhhh yea yea! Totally! He brought me more contracts today, that's all"

"Isn't that Miss Pauling's job?" you asked.

"Uhhhhhhhh....- Oh look a distraction!"

He said quickly and pointed behind you. In impuls, you turned around, realising that he just bamboozled you, and when you turned around to face him you realized he was already gone. Confused, you just shrug your shoulders and moved on to deliver packages to Medic, so he could continue his twisted experiments wondering what kind od secret Scout is hiding.

You noticed that Scout has been acting strange lately, to the point you considered for a moment he might be a enemy Spyn, but other mercs assured you he isn't. You talked with everyone about it, but no one seemsesd have clear answer as to why he was acting like this. You felt left out, as if they knew something you didn't. What if he didn't like you anymore..., you took a deep breath before walking up to Scout, who was eating his breakfast.

"Scout. Can we talk? Alone?" You asked.

Scout spit out his drink before looking at you.

"I uhhh. S-Sure. But maybe later? How about... on the roof at sunset?" he proposed.

You aggred, walking away a bit sad. He was always ready to talk with you about everything right away. You tried not to think about it, so you went to your room to prepare for the evening.

When the sun was finally starting to set, you immediately went to the roof for a meeting with Scout. He was there first, dressed up in nice clothes, without his favorite hat and something behind his back.

"There you are! Good to see ya good lookin' " He said happily greeting you.

"Hello, Scout. It's good to see you" you said, gently smiling.

"You look- you look- uhhhhh- gorgeous! Yes! Absolutely gorgeous"

"Thank you. You look great too"

He smiled and chukled.

"Hey, uhhhh, there is something I needed to tell ya. You see...I-... you see- I really wanted to tell you that, but... I didn't know how"

Hearing this, you sighed and with sad look on your fave you spoke.

"I understand. And that's okay with me..."

"Uhhhh- really? That is- wow! That's great!"

"Yea... I understand if you don't want to be near me...." you said with small tear in your eye.

"Yes I- wait what!?" Scoit jumped, at these words.

"I saw that one coming. You were avoiding me for weeks. You were ignored me. If I was making you feel uncomfortable with my presence, that's fine-"

"Wow, wow, what?!" Scout shouted. "You never made me feel uncomfortable! I- what are you talking about?!"

You looked at Scout with some tears in your eyes. Seeing this, Scout sighed and walked up to you.

"H-Hey, don't cry. I-.... I'm sorry. I never wanted to make you feel ignored. It was.... stupid. " he cleaned tears from your cheeks before biting his lip. "Look, I'm not the best at this, and this is probably realllyyyy awkward for ya, but... I never ignored you because I don't like you. I didn't talk to you because I was a bit, but just a bit scared. Because you are so cool and hot and cool and you are you!"

You blushed and looked at a Scout, as he finally showed you a small black box.

"My point is... you are like, so cool, and I think I like you. Like like you like you. Like superrr like you. So, I wanted to ask if you would like to go on a date...with me?" he opened a small box, and the inside was a small beautiful brooch.

"I made sure it has your favourite colours on it. Do you...like it?"

"I do. Yes! Thank you"

Scout made small victory dance before pinning it to your chest. He smiled and walked up closer to you.

"So uh, would you like to go out on a date with me?"

"Yes, of course" you answered.

Scout smiled and hugged you with all his strength. After a while, he let you go and the two of you started talking about the date, where and when you should arrive, what you should wear (Scoit said you look great in anything anyway), and finally to say goodbye he gently kissed your cheek.

"See you later then, hot shot" he laughed when he saw your cheeks getting more red. "Aww, don't worry, maybe I'll kiss you more on our date" he said before walking away.

You stood there, looking up at the sky, flustered and happy that you two would spend time together, and that was all you could think about....

[Hope you enjoyed this shot story. I apologise for not writing this earlier. If you want more, crush/romantic/platonic story's with mercs ask for them in my askbox! Thank you for reading!💀💙]