Anyone Else Ever Feel Like Their System Has Too Many Issues? Like, If I Find One More Physical Or Mental

This is very true, though I would like to add that you don’t have to have DID for your symptoms to be valid. You can still feel things and have symptoms even if they don’t fit the diagnostic criteria. Does that mean you have DID? No. But you are still entitled to your emotions and feelings, especially if those feelings are a result of trauma.

Does anyone realize that the "everyone is valid" thing has actual diagnostic implications?

Yes, every case of DID will have differences from another. But all DID cases must meet diagnostic criteria in order to actually be DID. You can't say "everyone is valid" and "DID can look like anything" because really, it can't. At the end of the day, there are still diagnostic criteria that must be met. If anything goes and anything is valid and anything can be DID, then DID is nothing and we might as well not even classify it as a disorder at all.

Same thing as people who say that "everyone has a little bit of DID" or "everyone has parts". Yes, you act differently at work than you do at home. This does not mean that you have dissociated parts of a fragmented self, and if it did, then DID would be a redundant diagnosis and there would be no need to have it in the ICD or DSM if "everyone" had it.

I hate constantly having to mask our identity to the point of forgetting who we are. It sucks

- Be

We really need to choose comfort shows that are actually, you know… comforting.

Just started rewatching one of our favorite shows and I honestly don’t remember it being so heart wrenching wrenching.

Anyways. *wipes tears and starts new episode* Back to it.

-Apollo? Maybe??

Tw: suicide attempt-hospitalization-mental health

Continue at your own expense

So, we’ve been gone for a bit. Our depressive episode came to a head, and we downed a months worth of our antidepressants and ended up on a ventilator in the ICU. We were in the hospital for 6 days before getting transferred to a psych unit where we spent another 8 days.

Everything before the OD is incredibly blurry. All of our memories feel farther away than they are and we keep getting confused on what happened when, not too far from the norm but much worse than usual. That mixed with the chronic back pain from lying in bed for six days means we are far from recovered.

That being said, I want to thank those who have supported me thus far. Even though most of them will never see this, I want everyone to know that none of them have given up on me, and they have all gone above and beyond to help me in anyway they can. I am so beyond appreciative for those who have stood by me despite my stupid decision making.

One of the reasons I’m posting this is to have a timeline of when things happened to look back on, but also so I don’t forget how many people have helped me.

-Apollo

New metaphor for a systemhood just dropped!

Our friend said something that got us thinking of this. I always use a spaceship (the millennium falcon specifically because it’s well known and fits the metaphor) but this one works pretty well too.

Your body is a computer. Most of the time it works best when a single person is using it (fronting), and sometimes it’s helpful to have someone else in the room watching you work and make suggestions though it can also be annoying and distracting (co-con). And there are also a lot of computers —though not all— that allow you to connect multiple game controllers to them in order to play a game with someone (co-fronting), when someone is doing this it often makes it more difficult to do certain things ,like typing, until you go back to a single user —the same way that co-fronting can be complicated and messy.

And being a computer, sometimes there are glitches. And it’s sometimes best to let someone else who is more equipped and tech savvy take over to solve the issue (switching under stress) and that moment where no one is actively using the mouse or keyboard the computer doesn’t do anything (heavy dissociation while switching). It’s also important to note that there are multiple people using the same computer, and they all prioritize different things, so a lot of time important files and information may be deleted by someone who deems it’s not necessary to keep or is better off unknown (amnesia).

If anyone thinks of a point to make please lmk, I’d love to add to it. Other than that, hope you guys find a good use for this metaphor and that it helps you give a singlet a better understanding.

Okay but can we talk about how much amnesia sucks? As a system we don’t have a lot of in the moment Black outs. We have some grey outs and a lot of emotional amnesia, but we don’t fade in and out of consciousness. At least not that we remember.

What we do struggle with is remembering past events. Even as far back as a week or two ago we have black spots that we can’t even remember that we don’t remember. Friends will tell me something happened and I just have to go with it even though I have absolutely no clue what their talking about.

I apparently beat my bf at a board game a few weeks ago and he brought it out again for us to play. I didn’t recognize it all. My first reaction was:

“Oh that looks like a fun game,”

Because I had zero recollection of ever playing it or even seeing it. My bf looked me dead in the face and asked if I was serious because it had only been a few weeks since I destroyed him at it.

There are so many good memories that I’m missing because of my disorder. So many moments that are lost to me and without me even realizing that they aren’t there.

This is one of the darker parts of the disorder that I don’t see talked about a lot. Missing time with loved ones so you don’t remember the trauma.

There are good things that have come from my system and headmates. But let’s not invalidate the pain that comes from not remembering your past.

So…. We’ve noticed that when some of us front we aren’t always aware of certain memories until someone else mentions them. Like, if you asked us to list something funny we might not be able to, but if you say, ‘hey remember this specific funny thing that happened’ we’ll instantly recognize what you’re talking about. It’s like that memory is blocked until we’re told to remember it. Is that something you guys also experience? Is it totally normal? Please share the poll to get more answers.

Anyone else have a host that loves their source and consumes startling amounts of media of it until they’re pulled to the front?

No one?

Cool.

-Varian

I hate it when people are aware that I’m not the host, then proceed to treat me like I am then.

-Hunter

Imagine being able to make shit like this. Like. Just bring it into existence. Just through sheer dedication and time and magic probably. I don’t fucking know I don’t have skills.

Deinonychus Takedown for animation practice