Love.

If I could...

I always wonder, if I could do a lot of things, life would have been a bit more simpler.

if I could read other people's mind it would have been simpler to avoid complications, to not hurt people. I would not have broken the trust of my beloved and regret those lies.

if I could go back in time, I would have undone a lot of things that hurt her and made her eyes go wet. I would have not fallen in love with all those wrong guys and now be in a state of hating love.

if I could get a second chance, I would apologize to all those whom I hurt.

if I could.... if I just could... I would do a hundred things that made life simpler, that made life easier.

What makes you think

You are different from the millions of others living in this planet.?

What makes you feel

That just by not doing what others are doing

You'll be different.?

Whatever it is, you're wrong

You are no different.

The same flesh

The same organs

The same creature

Humans.

Maybe your face is different

Your finger prints are different

The color of your eyes

The length of your hair

Is different.

But that's it

You are the same.

The same flesh

The same bone

The same creature

Humans.

Just because you do or don't do something

Doesn't make you different.

The fact that you feel different

During different situations

Doesn't make you different.

It's the same

The same flesh

The same skin

The same creature

Humans.

I'm angry

I'm depressed

I'm furious

I'm sad

I'm all of this

But, they are just common human emotions.

The same flesh

The same emotions

The same creature

Humans.

And that's the melancholy of being human

It's all the same.

You can't mess with my head and then say I was wrong. You can't tell me I'm amazing and then stop talking to me.

in love with this

Road.

Two roads diverged,

like the Robert frost poem.

I reckon, I chose the right one.

The one that took me, lands away,

showed me a small glimpse of

what the Eden looks like.

Verdure, the road beholds nothing

but lustful verdure on both sides.

I felt like I was drowning,

I felt like I was in middle of

a boisterous ocean.

A ocean, big, but not blue.

I confronted things I had never ever

felt in the bustle city life on mine.

I witness greenery, a sheer flora.

Like a big green mattress

laid vastly infront of me.

I felt like a small lost little ant

looking from sugar crumbs

moving back and forth

in that mattress.

I didn’t know how long I’d been there.

Probably hours, but I realized one thing,

All these days in the cantankerous life

I had had, I had lived like a man

who was allergic to oxygen.

I though maybe I should pack

something with me. It should not be

the oxygen, it should not be

that seducing frondescence,

it should not be the dangling harvests

It should be something that reminds me

what I withstood that moment.

Instead of all the alluring things out there

I chose the tamest one,

It was the picturesque memories

that I bagged wishing secretly that

I could cherish it every day.

- lsr

With mountains climbed

Stars gazed at.

It's been a beautiful week of all my life.

With friends made, and friendships bonded

I don't know how life could change.

People talked, laughed, had a merry go ride.

This has been where relationships redefined

New ones made

Judgements broken and new ones made.

Love to all the people and all the memories.

To the good and bad triping

I was never theirs

It took me a long time

To realize what had happened.

All this while I was blaming them

For the way I was.

It was me who made all the mistakes…

Mistake of trusting them,

Believing in them,

Thinking they were mine.

I thought I was loved less…

How wrong was I..

Coz’ I was never loved at all.

I thought they wanted good for me,

Alas, good was never present.

I thought a lot of things,

Perhaps how wrong was I…

My parents were never mine,

It was never their mistake

Coz’ I was the one who had mistaken

That I was theirs

But it turns out that

I was never theirs….

What I wouldn’t do for you

You were my kid once. You were the one I cared about the most once. You were my soul and my life. I don’t know when that changed and how it changed. I remember giving you all that was mine. Being partial towards everything you did. Knowing all your sins and still supporting you. I was your backbone and I was your system. I dint care about me, my things, or my life, for that matter. I wanted you to be in peace and have fun in life. From 15 I turned 35 for you and from 35 I turned you 15. I would have done anything for you, bring starts on earth, travel to Mars to give you a little alone time. I would have done anything you asked for, you demanded for. I dint care about how you asked. I would have and actually speaking I did.

But you started betraying me, using me, and above all took me for granted. You assumed that I was just for you and had nothing of my own. You dint even acknowledge my presence let alone my life. I would hear hours together about what you have to say, but when I open my mouth you disappear. I give you everything I have but you can’t even give me a small portion of your time. I would have given you my soul and my life, actually speaking I did.

If you had been loyal to me, I would have given you my life. I wouldn’t do any of this for you now. In fact I wouldn’t do anything for you now. And now by you I mean everybody. I wouldn’t do anything for anybody because I’m tired, sick and done doing it for you and everybody else. What I wouldn’t do for you? You ask me, well I wouldn’t do anything for you my dear, not just for you but for anybody, is all I say, to you and to everybody.

he thinks he gave me scars,

scratched the old ones.

he has not given me tears, because all he has given me is  happiness beyond words

the intensity of your love is what brings me closer to you, closer to your love and beyond all to life

I know I cried. I know I should not have. 

but that’s what i am. 

tears are my mates and sadness my pal. 

you have not brought them to me, they stayed from before.

I am healed not from what happened today, but I am healed from my old scars, not by time but by your love.

so my love, don’t take the blame, take credit for bringing me back to life,

coz, i owe this to you and your love

It all happens, but he doesnt know...

I see you everyday, when you come in the same train. Sit right opposite me everyday. And you dont even notice me. I work in your same building one floor down but never have you noticed me. I sip coffee everyday sitting far away noticing your charm and wondering will it ever happen. But not once have you known my existence.

I reached home late, and there you were making dinner for us. After I had freshened up we both sat down in the balcony table and had the wonderful dinner under the moon light. I was lost in your arms and spellbound by your gaze. Your one touch makes me go numb, your one kiss melted me completely.

I wake up to find out its all a dream. A dream I wait to see everynight. An universe opposite to reality I had made up.

I see you again in the train and in the coffee shop waiting to go and sleep so I can fall in your arms and feel your love in the parallel universe I have made for myself. The romance there never dilutes, never vanishes. I love you. And will always do...