I Stopped Breathing For A Moment.😂

When you’re cleaning the house and your back starts to hurt-

Sagittarius: You’re blocking the view.

Leo: I am the view.

people of color: we’re excited to see remakes of shows that have characters that look like us. it makes us feel represented and that’s great.

the whites who have 200+ shows with characters that look like them:

!!!!!

Someone: I’d love to read some of your writing some time

Me, who never gets anything finished:

So I was talking to my parents at the beginning of break

Mom: You're still playing that Skyrim game?

Me: Hey, I'm taking advantage of winter break. Besides, this is a cool game. Like, I can kill dragons, do magic, get married, join factions-

Dad: *from across the room* Get married?

Me: Yeah. And buy houses, too. I can even marry a woman. Like, I could marry my housecarl if I wanted.

Mom: Your what?

Me: Lydia. My housecarl.

Dad: Which is...?

Me: Um, she fights with me, carries my stuff-

Mom: So she's a slave?

Me: ...

Me: No.

Mom: She sounds like a slave.

Dad: What's this about you marrying a slave?

Mom: She's really a slave, right?

Me:

Mom: It seems like a failure of ethics to force your slave to marry you.

Me: But I'm not forcing her to marry me! Once I put on the Amulet of Mara she gets interested in me all on her own!

Dad: So, what, you're not attractive until you put on a fancy-dancy necklace and then force your slave to marry you?

Dad: We've raised her wrong. Keeping a slave, making her do all the dirty work, and then forcing her to get married? Incredible.

Dad: And I suppose then you force her to live with you, too.

Me:

Me:

Me: Fine, then, I'll marry Aela.

Mom: Who's Aela? Another slave?

Me: No, a werewolf. A Companion.

Dad: *throws magazine onto floor* BESTIALITY?

Mom: You're going to marry a wolf? You gonna enslave her too?

Me:

Me:

Me:

Me: So can I go back to campus now, or do I have to live with this for the next forever and a half?

Dad:

Mom:

Dad:

Mom: *walking into the kitchen with her hands on her head* We've raised a lesbian slave-owner who regularly commits bestiality.

Dad: She's your daughter.

My mind is like an internet browser. 17 tabs are open, 4 of them are frozen and I don’t know where the music is coming from.

YEAH if you’re LGBTQIAP+ you’re AMAZING and i love you

the most valid person ever no matter what because if you feel it, you feel it!!

ATTENTION MALE SPECIES!

If you need to affix the prefix “man” before the words bun, braid, plait, or any other hairstyle for whatever reason then you don’t deserve to rock the style. Please understand that these styles in their purest form have been around for gods know how long and rocked by everything from male warriors to queens and everything in between. Therefore, there is no need to place a gender specific term on it as though you are doing anything differently because you’re a male!

Thanks,

Me.

These kind of people are hard to find.