I Miss My Gf

Folks, this is weird!

This is too good. :)

Remus: hey, why aren’t koalas considered bears?

Sirius: because they don’t have the right koalafications

Remus: no you dumb piece of shit, it’s because they’re marsupials

Sirius, muttering: the one time I think he’s trying to tell a joke I get it wrong, fucking-

Yes then Brooklyn

My Favorite TV Shows (ranked by my followers) #05. Brooklyn Nine Nine (September 17, 2013-September 16, 2021) I’m happy to be here with my family. My super weird family with two black dads, and two latina daughters, and two white sons, and Gina, and… I don’t know what you are, some… strange baby. To the Nine-Nine!

Obliviated but you do you boo xx

Hermione: Harry, stop eating cake icing.

Harry: IM SORRY but are YOUR parents dead because of a noseless man? NO? That's WHAT I THOUGHT!

Hermione: Youre disgusting.

Rot please x

dear assholes who villanize lily evans in fanfics just to get her out of the way for the main ship,

you can rot in Azkaban for what you’ve done <3

This is how I will be measuring my height from now on.

You'd think Americans would have come up with this already, but here we are.

This is just amazing

Jealous

“What the hell is your problem, Hermione?!” Ron slammed the classroom door shut, locked, and silence it for good measure.

Hermione spun around on her heel and stomped towards him. “YOU!! You great, thickheaded prat!!”

Ron kept her pace and marched towards her, not backing down an inch.

“Oh look! Little Miss Perfect has her knickers in a twist about something, yet again! Let’s here it, Hermione! What have I done to offend your delicate sensibilities now? Did I burp at a house elf? Did I misspell a word on my charms essay? What have I done to offend you, oh great one?!”

Hermione saw red. If he wanted a fight she was gonna give it to him. She balled up her fists, and stuck out her chin.

“Don’t you talk to me like that, Ronald Weasley! You- you ginger-headed broomstick! You haven’t been free of Lavender for more than two weeks, and I look over to catch you ogling that 5th year like you’ve never seen a girl before!”

“What the hell do you care who I ogle?! Ow! Hermione, stop!”

Hermione kicked him in the shin. And just for good measure, she slapped him across the shoulder.

While Ron was ducking from her blows he cast a nonverbal spell that slid her across the room.

“Why are you always so violent, you barmy witch?!”

“Why are you always so irritating, Ronald?! Stop playing dumb! You know why it bothers me!”

“Oh yeah?! Why don’t you spell it out for me?”

She stomped her foot. “I’m not saying anything! I’m tired of making the moves! Every time I do, you throw it in my face! You make a move! I think I’ll go write Victor a letter! I never caught him ogling other girls!”

And with that she marched toward the door.

Ron jumped in her path. “Oh Vicky, huh? Sure, he’ll come and save the day, won’t he?”

“He’s less infuriating than you are! Move Ronald!”

“I don’t think I will!”

Hermione pointed her wand at him and a blue light shot out of the tip. Ron ducked quickly and came back up “Ha!” He said triumphantly pointing his own wand at her.

Hermione slid back to the wall again, but this time her hands were pinned above her head. She tugged on them experimentally and realized he had cast a sticking charm.

Hermione started pulling on her hands furiously. She was madder than a wet kneazle. Ron was walking towards her, watching her, apparently quite impressed with his handiwork.

“Well, well, well what do we have here? The great Hermione Granger stuck to a wall huh?” He gave her a cocky grin.

“Stop calling me that! I never said I was great! You let me go right now,or I’ll hex you in to next week!”

“All the more reason not to let you go! And I wasn’t ogling her, Hermione. We were just having a conversation about quidditch. That’s all. She likes the Chuddley Cannons.”

Hermione stopped struggling and looked at him. He was standing right in front of her now.

“Ron, let me go,” she said in a much calmer voice.

Ron watched her like he was considering something. He put his wand to her wrist, and the bond broke. Hermione brought her hands down and shook them out.

He took one of her hands in his examining it.

“Did I hurt you?” He asked quietly.

“No, of course not!” She took a step towards him. He was still looking at her hand, rubbing it with his thumb. He pulled it to his mouth and gently kissed it.

Ron looked at her still not letting go of her hand. He tucked one of her curls behind her ear. “You’re not really gonna write to that tosser are you?”

“He’s not a tosser, but no, I suppose not,” she said getting lost in his blue eyes. His fingers were lingering on her neck.

“Good. Because I can’t stand him. I don’t trust him. He only wants one thing from you, Hermione,” Ron’s thumb was rubbing her cheek now, and he was staring at her lips.

“And what do you want, Ron?” Hermione asked him, resting her hands on his chest.

Ron’s eyes met hers. He swallowed hard and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He leaned down and kissed her softly, slowly. He pulled back and looked at her again.

Hermione grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him back to her. Ron’s lips crashed onto hers, kissing her passionately. His hand threaded into her hair and held her head still so he could get even closer to her.

His tongue was sliding across hers, and his lips were so soft. She felt his strong arm wrap around her waist and hoist her up. They were moving somewhere, but she was too busy to pay attention. She felt her bottom land on a flat surface, probably a desk. She noticed her height was closer to his now. She grabbed Ron’s face and kissed him hard wrapping her legs around his waist, pouring everything she wanted to say into that kiss.

Ron’s hands were rubbing her waist. He pulled her shirt out of her skirt, so he could run his hands on her bare skin. His mouth left hers to kiss along her neck. She let out a whimper, which seemed to break the spell.

He pulled back and looked at her, searching her eyes for something. “Is this what you want? With me?” He asked.

She grabbed his face in her hands. “Yes!” She said fiercely trying to make him understand.

He looked down seeming to lose his nerve. “I’m not Krum,” he said quietly.

Hermione felt her stomach clench. “Good!” She said. Ron’s head snapped back up to look at her.

“I don’t want Victor. I want you! And I can’t stand it when you look at another girl like you did Lavender. I can’t stand the thought of you- you- with another girl!”

Hermione was working herself up again. Ron put his hand on her face and made her look at him.

“I’ll never look like her,Ron,” she said weakly. “And- and I’ll never understand the appeal of quidditch! So if that’s what you like in a witch, just forget it!” She said sticking her chin out again.

Ron snorted. “I like the way you look. And not liking quidditch hasn’t stopped me from being your friend. Why would it stop me from… being more?”

Hermione gave him a small smile. “You were jealous of Victor,” she said with mirth in her voice.

He smirked at her, “Ruddy pumpkin-head, he is. And you were jealous of Lavender.”

“She looks like a terrible kisser,” Hermione said, the distaste clear in her tone.

Ron grinned at her.

“Shut it,” she said.

Ron laughed. “I didn’t say anything!”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “No, but you were thinking it.”

“And what was I thinking?” He wanted to know still smiling at her.

“I have no idea, but I’m sure it would irritate me,” she said.

Ron laughed again. “You know, you’re cute when you’re jealous.”

“Shut up, and kiss me,” Hermione grabbed him and kissed that lopsided grin right off his face.

THREE TIMES!!!!

:)

movie ron: i’ll heh go easy on you. even though you have consistently showed us how proficient you are at spellcasting and how hyper confident you are at magic. i’m the Man so i’ll go easy, don’t worry my overwhelming manliness will not allow me to disarm a poor defenceless girl

book ron: [excitedly] I DISARMED HERMIONE THREE WHOLE TIMES DID YOU SEE THAT HARRY DID YOU?????

They’re all so cute

Golden Trio hanging out in Hogsmeade 🍺