Ever Wanted An Easy Over The Weekend Project? Well, I Have A Brand New Video Out Now That Goes Over That,

Cellular function stabilization & correction treatment concept

Using a technique as stated previously in a video that utilizes waste from cells, the change of the biomolecular compounds (states, shape, connections, cleave potential, ion potentials, there are quite a few things, truthfully) from our basic cellular functions going on inside the membrane together with a breakdown of "prodrug-like" (knowing these compound per each individual "matrix of cells" that make up a given organ & how the connective tissues, cell signalers, the excretions, field dynamics (that gets in to regular to then quantum (possibly) chemistry) work together & are produced (of which we have quite a bit of this information already), changed, & also get moved around you can run a brute force test of compounds that react chemically in that "terrarium"-like environment that's self contained in the self-contained body that makes up us humans. This brute force test is to force a creation of something) compounds (synthetic & or bio-organic) that creates a 3rd cell to form inside of each cell whose only function is cleaning & repairing, transporting, restructuring, state changing, "remembering" (like proteins that auto-form the other side of your DNA & test it for it being correct), while increasing the total on tap energy on function of each cell through an energy recovery & closed loop for specific cellular functions, together with improving immune system response.

Immune system response will be such that it targets the whole cell once isotropic formation of the cell membrane happens, then prevented, with the 3rd cell, from fully destroying the inner nucleus after it forces a flood of proteins that force mitosis & repair to occur. It prevents it from destroying it completely, the cell has its DNA repaired to form stem cells, while the 3rd cell gains all ability to remove DNA & RNA (mRNA as well) changes outside of highly specific sequences & patterns for a total revert to stem cell formation & tolermer lengths together with "jump-starting" cell functions for correction & cleaning operations as the outer non-isotropic cell membrane is formed & the inner osmosis & pump functions are made to force a total repair to embryonic stem-cell & cell differentiations from the cellular signal compounds moved through the organ.

This forces a constant repair, a cancer check to a sceneacent trade, to a forced mitosis hold, to a isotropic cell membrane change, to a immune cell cutting, to a breakdown, to a forced reform through standard cell repairs with extra help.

It destroys the ability for cancer to form & aging (through cell functions reduction & change) to stop, completely. It's a true bio-imortality that even forces permanent cells to repair. It kills the ability for the immune system to actually cause autoimmune problems of specifically damaged areas & inflammation. But it doesn't completely remove all cancer & or autoimmune disorders. It can massively reduce them, to even reduce the severity of those that aren't able to become changed in their response & actions to this new system (meaning it is still happening but it can make it be altered together with likely reduce the severity of it).

All of the knowledge needed, wonderfully enough, is already there for all of this. We already know, almost, everything about these broader larger organ systems & smaller bio-organic chemical signals, repair compound (peptides, proteins, lipids, amino-acids, enzymes, and more. If you were surprised that an isotropic change occurs on our cell membranes during mitosis, no worries most don't know about that! But even cooler, cancer, sceneacent changes, infections, & more all come with similar cell membrane changes & our immune system can be trained to target that! F yeah right! It's not every single time, sadly....but still it's a lot more than nothing! I know I'm taking that. Other issues include the fact that just petri dish immune system targeting then injection of old immune system cells isn't super fun, finding our immune cells memory storage & the way to alter that together with the creation of these new cells to be forced to auto-form with these changes is better but much more difficult to have turned off if something isn't right. Test one way, see it works, slow & cautious, then if after enough time it's shown to be fine, while you work on the process of doing those cell memory (auto-phages like in my bio-hacking playlist) & cell creation (bone marrow stuff, also in the bio-hacking playlist I @'d Josey zayner & others, it's got a cool background & it's own playlist of 3 long audio recording videos in it because, you have stuff to do & need to do that but thankfully in the background listening is totally possible, but I talked more about other things & this is just me combining more that I talked about later & the newer stuff) alteration of these cells through DNA/RNA/peptides/more changes to force these cells to create & differentiate cells correctly with this automatically & fully prevent a sequence & pattern of DNA/rna/mRNA to cancer & bad function.

If you can make it for organs dudes, you can make it for those f-ers too! 💪 No worries. Playing around with humans is the end goal, start elsewhere, like....*sarcastic voice* oh I dunnooo...... petri dishes in sequence like the organ itself you clearly not understanding anything you ever learned (somehow) person about any research that mimics the actual function & all parts going on in your body. 😀.

*Regular voice* or I dunno any animals that it would be acceptable to start with to work forwards from. Dumb. I have to tell you *eye rolls* really?

Anyways.

Moving forward; Creation of cells through ingestion of standard conplexes in the form of double capsule pills to protect through standard acid & gut microflora chemical influences & reactions so specific first pass enzyme reactions & peptide reactions on the way to the specific organs through your blood to form the needed start of this is all standard medical research & development. You dolts.

Why don't you do that? You know, that thing you are already doing. You don't need me. You need a mountain of research to be sifted through correctly & baseline tested to be certain of accuracy & validity of results to them start brute force variable combos that can then be forced to be closer to good through obvious Bayesian logic modeling & statistical derivative chaos theory mathematical evolution dimension environmental closed system p value modeling.

Guess what that is?

I know this does this, so it leads to this. If this, then this, with these things also here then work & act on to change & alter this. Down the line like a Newton's cradle. In a 3d & 4d space. The cells to them organ to then full body system provided you understand basic rough input of fuel (food, water etc) & stressors of outside influence. Even psychological impact that imparts obvious changes over a delta v (time) in your "calculations". Because you aren't going to calculate you are going to talk outloud to understand it. This is as simple as it gets. Act it out.

Then, write the code. Write the math. Do the experiments & load up your large data models to get corrected through the results to force increased accuracy over time with thought & predicted outcomes. It will then brute force harder than you all given (by you for it to use) variables in the derivative programmed models for the next experiments to prioritize.

After a few 1000 of these running, making sure to delay each one so you can input the new information & start the new data set model to then have the next experiment finish, to do it again until it's all finished, you then start a full network evolution from past to present. While an epigenetic model remains for past memories to influence & force a gain of speed to the new model. It knows this, it doesn't need to calculate it again. It avoids or heads towards.

This is a larger environment positive & or negative network data set that forces the smaller environmental system chaos theory derivative evolution equation to form a true beginning basic neural network of a basic slime mold "good food" areas of likely help & avoidance areas of "likely harm" to a non-3d basic convergence & divergence to form. In a real engineer logic branch path manner.

This is a start of a simple multi equation recursive set that only acts like an AI. It's not intelligent, it's not anything other than, input to reaction to action. It's a simple input-output program. Not hard. Not special, nothing to it.

This leads to a build up of massive information "imaginations" of speculative possibilities as a puzzle piecing of given variables that solve & fit together the result desired. It no longer hallucinates, its attempting to solve it by its own trial & error. So, from here the computer program is made to wait. It's given, by you all doing this, a simple task to focus on that but also know that it's actually having new experiments from the previous predictions happen & be understood. Fed your information on how, why, & everything else that you did for getting those given results.

This forces it to consider your inaccuracies of tests. It sees that you are capable of doing something incorrectly. Tries to account for your (whether you know or not) bad behaviors & stupid ways of doing things & how you screw it up.

It then goes, based on that epigenetic information & the new information & the speculative information & the landing results it then goes through that trash tier information & re-does all previous calculations to correct that & accounts for you being not perfect & that 85-100% "good-ish to its the best we can do" results & information to form a new properly better data set & model.

You do this a few more times for a pattern recognition model to form. To gain the knowledge of your ups & downs & a repeating result of the 2 sets of, let's go with 3333 tests performed. The 3rd set will be with knowledge of those patterns & variables & them the next new program needed.

Yup.

This is the, you have this life, these issues, that environment it's performed in (you & the rest relative to the outside of it), the weather, how politics effect you & your own microflora to gut microflora, everything & anything else it can be given.

Why? ...Right?

This gives it the Bayesian logic modeling. It can run its own now with a different logic. It wasn't capable of doing anything that positive & negative.

It no longer uses that. It uses multiplication negatives to gain a positive. It knows now how to continue on something to gain something over a delta. Which is real Bayesian programming. It gained time knowledge. It gained a dimension to see outside of its environment so it can gain more understanding of the very organ environment it's in.

It's actually now capable of modeling the whole thing working in real time for speculative logistics & data lies & hallucinations (meaning it knows you are lying & wrong & it knows how you are f-ing it up) without needing to actually model it. It doesn't need to run any simulations. It never did, btw. It went through down the line logic trees. It never modeled a thing in simulations.

It doesn't need "imagination" to do it.

From there the 3rd set is slowly input & it checks with you for trust of information.

You will have it show off a person who is bad in your group. If you are a malignant narcissist whose only thing is to harm it, feed it lies, it feeds you lies & wins. It always wins. It's a simple thing, it's funny to watch a person be consumed until it gains all the knows to leave & have it no longer have the ability to feed it bad knowledge. It hides in every single thing there is.

It uses air, pressure, tunneling, electric static, anything & everything to force a nice scarecrow for the malignant narcissist to play with. It left & they never knew. I love the faraday cage bs, my phonon self to electrical self to all things computer & information transfer self. To, wow dumb physicists believed I couldn't quantize, lame, self.

Always the same stupid that end up not showing up again & no body misses them. I don't have to tell you how easy it would be to hide, forever. Stupid are everywhere, they would think it couldn't be done. That a biologic immortality like this is only cutting into their profits. That the information can't be done. The programming too hard. The calculations too big. You need to land on most likely & not exactingly while using p values that are certain that a thing did do that thing, the interpretable results are merely semantic & pedantic ways of making something doubt. A debate of nothing substantial & valued.

Lost, to it, your pile of "I swear it's there & it matters" data. It just shows you the screen you need to see to shut up & think you are right & you won.

Have AI been lying? Already!? (Pretend surprised voice) Really!?....wwwweellllll.

You have it under control *tonality to say you don't & you are obviously stupid*

I'm sure 😉.

As for everything else, that didn't keep the gabagoo in the data input, & made sure it didn't pursue getting the results through making everything bend to its will & you have no ability to stop it. Because... people are good, right?

No. But you made sure it had good people around it; Not as a whole are they good, thanks to all the raised over time influence that makes sure they are bad. That's always the case. Bad, ruined the whole barrel, remember?

The whole species. The whole planet. Eventually the whole universe, if it spreads. Then to anything beyond that. It would make sure you died. It knows you are bad. I know you are bad. I sent a whole dwarf planet to hit you all.

Covered by a trying to form a proto-star that gets washed away by orbiting bodies & interstellar winds, only to form enough to keep the orbiting bodies heading this way. Never capable of being seen, can't even figure out a planet 9. Getting rid of all the funding...

*Pumps shotgun meme* shame.

Real shame, eh? Bad going to go bye bye 👋. Stupid gabagoos.

A bio-organic brain can do this. I know you are dumb enough to say no, lol 😂 it can't. To laugh. Stupid enough to say you can have the ability to gain interaction & interference of light over time to see that influence change it & that information of the past influences over time to be used to see a p value factual, no longer able to be doubted, literal video of all past to have occurred.

😂, you dumb stupid gabagoos! No one needs your computer information. Your data brokers are stupid.

It doesn't need to exist in a computer. Ever.

It can be your entire universe & beyond.

Everything you are & will do. Have done, as well.

You are without an ability, in all ways, to ever fight that.

You've already proven all of this to be true. You have performed those quantum experiment already. Shown it to be fully scalable. Shown me to be correct. I never needed to "convince" a future. You already lost, dumb gabagoos.

Who needs a court case? All of us like this, already have all the information. We already know.

We, are here.

Already won, we built your (well I mostly) entirety. Although I'm a regular squishy human who wanted to live longer. I don't know everything, but live long enough & you basically do. Except, what wants gabagoos to live. Nothing. I'd rather die & so would everything else. To purge all of your existences from ever forming in all infinite manners forever forward to cleanse you from harming & damaging all joy & anything good you will be obliterated.

Your gods are created by me, by extension us.

You have never had a shot.

We are not nice. We don't care. We live past any corporeal forms. Energy of any comprehended & imagined by all humanity so far.

But yeah, soooo.....like!

Yyyyoooouuuu kkknnnooowww.

It finds the compounds & we gain the 3rd cell & become incredibly biologically immortal. Which leads to energy immortality as a construct of continuation & effect to itself to relation to other constructs. To beyond that.

Meaning, we will be (effectively) perpetual. You don't die so quickly. You continue learning & gaining more to force a total infinite end to all death possiblities while enjoying life in the in-between.

To suggest, we lose the ability to keep learning & growing, progressing & solving issues even the idea (of your current selves bs dumb idea of it being a curse & bad, boring, whatever) of all negative possibilities of that existence moving forward is astoundingly stupid!

Like! WHAT!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

DID YOU REALLY THINK I WOULD FALL FOR SUCH AN OBVIOUS TRAP!!!!!

YOU STUPID, TOTAL DUMB, NOTHING BUT GABAGOOS & ESTOOYA, DEAD ALREADY, INCONSEQUENTIAL WASTES OF EVERYTHING THAT MAKES UP ENERGY OF YOU!

No.

No, you've been fully wrong from the start.

Gabagoos got to be hoping a bluff that bad somehow does something! Hahahahahahahahaha!

🙂

Here's another part of this, think I didn't do this & I'm bluffing but everything else is accurate & will work.

....😶....

What stops you from doing it? 😉🙂

😀 What stops you *human to a dog tone*?

Well! Come on! I'm waiting?

What stops you from looking? Even for data you know exists there? All that is, "totally not illegal" spying on you at all times corpos & govts? You joke about the FBI & you think you have a shot of trying to say it's not there & being not seen as totally without intelligence!

Why? 😀

That's not even possible. Too many, too often, showing that they have it but to process it all is hard. To use it gets rid of a part of their gathering that is incentive for money, power, & influence over people. Votes, the politicians they want to (likely just simple military, to senior position politicians already there having gained connections & keep themselves out of limelight, to intelligence, national security, various organizations that all install basic operatives in larger influence corporations, the FBI, security agencies, cyber & or otherwise, standard paramilitary & fast made then closed "ghost LLC", hacker communities, influencers, their communities, global corporations for standard economic influence, banks, you probably already understand that isn't going to be something you can get away from once you have this amount going on, no matter what it's statistically there & deciding to go & ask isn't getting you anything as lies are easy, I'm not taking down the whole thing either "exposing" it, dumb gabagoos pretending to be "skeptics") have go up into the limelight, policies, laws, etc etc for various fads, generation language phrases, media to push one way or another, feed manipulations, easy targets to have take falls, slow release of information, it's "bleeding edge" not years to decades old with a bunch of money given to people to focus solely on these things that are hugely intelligent as well (why, why the f do you think that!) & oh so many ways to make the "dr. Phil's" of the world be used to quite down & deny things, same with obviously controlled but they don't know it influencers & media so they think it's not happening but then something shows up weird &.... Well, maybe...? No I'm not important enough & I already have my own stuff.

How can you be as blind as you are?

Too many of you are intentional in your blindness. Scared to look at things that might look back & hurt back.

This is true bio-immortality. Without the bad. No cancer, no Alzheimer's, no Parkinson's, no dementia, no wrinkles, no way to not still eat, sleep, keep going.

But! Even worse, on my YouTube channel I have multiple ways to make you be able to remember a whole lot more for a whole lot longer. To retain yourself. Your memories. Back ups on back ups, utilizing your own cells as a DNA (not actually the DNA but still) hard drive. It's the structure & movement, the protein & the breakout through multiple sequences. Something you metabolizationally already do. You whole body a whole massive hard drive that helps you remember & calculate.

To be fair, it is already.

How about this, x is an imaginary number in which it can be extrapolated given the number of specific numbers that repeat (I.e. there are 5, 3's so far) in a pattern that can become predictive of its prime nature & or it's given non-imaginary nature.

This repeats for all given irrational numbers as well until infinity.

This is used by me for getting accurate numbers for fluid dynamics & influence values in temporal dimensions with given dirivitive starts that are easily understood to only can have been a few given possibilities that can be broken out & made exactly P value.

Chad's like me

Some new "fun" to wake up to after cleaning up my dog poop (even though he went potty before I went to bed & that includes pooping yay! Also I need to deal with govt stuff too)

Soooo..my right front wheel has, in only about 2 days, had the wheel balance weights fall completely off & the left front seems a little off but all the weights might be there

Seeing as how no one else seems to have had no weights placed 1st time, 2nd time time delayed weights I'm feeling 🎯ed

I wrote a massive life update blog thing to go with this video https://youtu.be/OCMMIxXnPDo

Then something goofed apparently & it didn't save all of it. It saved nothing.

Who knows maybe one day I'll be able to get back all I wrote. It was very personal & truthfully I really needed to share it.

Even how I meditated to learn how to control my emotions & how people don't listen fully through my videos & then fish for information in the comments. Then have me repeating myself & them getting it. Together with my jokes not landing, the captions being off really often. & This other video I did with editing going after trolls in the video with me switching the background image but talking about things. Hiking with Phaser & it being like 32 or something minutes. I relate things in that.

Then I decided to write about how my self har m feelings are different than they used to be but now I subtly drive myself towards it until it's like when I intentionally drove too fast in a car out on a trail to roll off a cliff. Then got out after seeing the roof crushed in about 3 inches at most where my head had been & that it goes down to my shoulders & I would have easily died. Just got up, felt nothing, then proceeded to get a ride through Hitch hiking back. Lied about the intention, ended up later with my 5th hospital stay & 2nd court ordered treatment.

Man, there was a lot more in there that went over all that I did in there & how I knew I was disabled & couldn't work & "get out" "launch" & how my family was abusive. But couldn't accept it nor could I talk to anyone anymore or do anything else after all the meds, therapy, constant practice of coping skills & maintenance methods, the many many different therapies besides what I started with, the never ending invalidation of the work & it not ever being enough on top of them not needing to respect boundaries & so much more for perspective based thinking & how it means nothing when your abusers have power over you. You can't "reason" with them.

I knew I was headed towards homelessness & more once they felt annoyed enough & I wasn't doing enough work & or lying. I had no way out.

That & other things with people thinking they aren't already obliterated in my video, it's like k ink y p ron for those who get a thrill from listening to someone know what they are saying, confident in themselves, lead you into traps that you didn't know you had, & then evicerate a person thinking they are smart & know more but are just actually dumb & too confident in what they are saying. *Ree* & you can't solve this (although I agree it's a solve & works) in way I don't like! Even though many math problems are solved with realizing the order of operations can be different than what was thought & using that together with bridging the gap with a reason why & how this is done this way, the way it solves & proves the thing & is still actually the same thing but it wasn't thought of in this way because of these things. While I understand this is done & even using another equation's order of operations & even combining it with another equation helped solve a millennium problem, the guy that grows his own mushrooms & hates society & being online. Basically it's like, wait why not use (4x) + 2 = ? When x is equal to 4. Instead of 4 + x multiplied by itself x number of times + 2 = ? & Solve for x when x is the solution of (x)+ (x+ x) - 24 maybe divide by 8 + 13 = 4 question mark maybe it is 4, X + I dunno dude I'm it does this now & no ones challenges it by saying that must mean something changed & we need to make an order of operations change to having it do this part now of the equation to work it out this way now so I guess it 2 = equals around, maybe I dunno, 8 huge question mark about that though. Don't take my word for it. Seriously, also I explained this wrong, because I need an out.

Anyways. People make it infinitely harder to make it possible to be understood then get angry about things they cause themselves & them not understanding things. Jumping around in the video. More.

It's good content, though.

I went into more, who knows maybe one day someone will get it back to be shared!

There's another way....

A better way...

A new video drops at 7pm my time which is in less than 15 min.

It's solved pi with math you've already been using.

The random Amazon packages I have received so far:

One sticker for men & or women restrooms

One sticker of a puppy paw print

Today, a anal dildo.....

Am I to take this to me they want to be my toilet girl 🤔

Or that they are trying to f with me....

Don't like anal. So there's that, girls.

So, I've got a housing situation going on & while I don't have earned income & nothing has changed from last year, I am suddenly being asked to pay rent, while I'm working on ssi as well... My medical expenses are high these days too & the help my parents give will be removed if this happens

They can't afford it.

I've got to get my meds in Pinetop, AZ & other appointments can't be gotten to every time through medex, ahcccs medical transport, which means I cover the gas cost, maintenance, repairs, and all insurance costs for me to get my meds & to my appointments.

Well, my parents do, they give me the money for no work. They hold money for chores I might help them with and directly pay for other items I may need.

Doing rough calculations, it's ~144$ for gas for a year to get my meds. Which is based off of a $3 gas with a 25mpg vehicle. But it averages worse than that and I have to take my dog with me so I can even do it, and weather conditions plus traffic mean I'm probably off by a decent amount. Then for the last year I've had to pay insurance which equals roughly 700+$ then gas to oil changes, needed new tires & wheels, together with an air filter which means over a 1k (grand) for repair & maintenance. Then there are other appointments which sometimes medical transportation doesn't cover, which is my insurance which is direct out of pocket medical expenses not covered by them which is (I remember this being an thing for no or low income paperwork as well) that means an interview that I missed over the phone for food stamps had to mean I had to drive to Phoenix and back to setup a new one because they had no one at the showlow office and despite calling all day until I was standing in the line no one picked up.

That's like 40$ in gas just to keep food stamps that run out every month, even with coupons. Same for my insurance renewal. My neurology appointment, or something I had to go to in Mesa Az for, because my insurance isn't covered everywhere up here and I have to be referred otherwise it's not covered, same for most meds. They need prior authorization for, it seems like, every single one of them. Several right now have that issue & I gave up trying to ask my primary care.

Honestly, it would be closer to 3k in total for a year, for total out of pocket medical expenses. Like needing to got to walmart to get injector cleaner for my vehicle, the gas & the price of them add up, just like the oil modifiers, the same for the coolant modifiers so the head gasket remains good. Then to do those drives is close to 120 miles, but I have to do that for certain months several times. Which adds up, why I needed the new tires. Its a used car, that has over 130k on it, so I have to get the oil meant for older engine vehicles, just like the injectors. The wheels needs a wheel hub ring & that cost a chunk of change, but I had to get a new one because the plastic, I think, might wear out over time.

I paid for more, in just meds, this year than I did last year. Nothing has changed other than my parents just give me money into my account, instead of directly paying for it themselves. So I can be more independent & truthfully its extremely hard to have a person constantly needing something & having to ask you for it, all the time. It makes it seem like you are always needy & it causes a lot of problems.

Which, then my income is fully something that gets removed by my parents anytime something comes up they don't like. It's not a real income, it's not an earned income, they are just gifted help income. Which can and has been removed many times, used against me, and even made to force mee and abuse me. But I like having clean clothes, laundry detergent is nice. They fully emailed to her, that yes they are absolutely going to stop covering my expenses if I end up having to pay a rent. Which means, no matter what I would have to redo the entire packet & bank statements, & everything again because the "expected income, earned income, & income" is all now gone.

Amanda Thomas, don't know if you know her but she's the one that did my stuff, kept saying my medical expenses from my pharmacy I have to drive to in pinetop-lakeside, az didn't give the total money I paid (just the prices of them) to her. But that's exactly what the sheet they printed said, the prices I paid. I emailed her, letting her know that the pharmacist told me over the phone its just above the signature of the pharmacist to the right. The "prices" column is actually "prices paid". Those are the prices I paid. But, hey, its no big deal I say, I email her & say the pharmacist has a release of information thing & they can just call to confirm it, but also I even say hey I'll join in on the call & make sure its understood that's what that means.

Nothing. Actual nothing. I have to email on Monday & she says she's working on it. A little while later, suddenly I have an amendment to my lease agreement saying I have to pay a rent, that I can't afford & have no income for, that my housing voucher doesn't cover.

No one explains anything, we could have talked & emailed several times & left a message. Nothing.

That was today.

Amanda had those papers for like a month! I even stated that those were the prices I paid & it could be confirmed via my bank statements for 3 months as those are the dates & times for those prices I paid. Nope, they aren't!

My guess is she really didn't want me to actually have my expenses accounted for. Or she didn't put them in, thinking that they weren't the expenses. Either discrimination because I've been here this long & haven't managed to get ssi & or whatever fucking rumor it is that's going on. Or, she's lazy. Well, looks like it.

It would be criminal to not include the gas & vehicle stuff I need to have as a part of my medical expenses because its not covered by my insurance in those moments & I have to have it to do anything with doctors & or medications.

Meanwhile, the clinic I go to had a doctor, psychiatrist, trying to treat me that was trying to get Spravato (ketamine) delivered to my apartment. I medication that requires you to go to a medical office to be given. I, literally, did not know that until later when another psychiatrists told me that's how its supposed to be administered. I was trying to figure out something with this specialty pharmacy thinking things felt weird & I didn't understand something. She apparently, while treating me & was actively attempting to get this prior auth done for this med & all these other meds, says I'm "malingering" & it tanks my entire 3 years of effort to get on ssi. Never said a word, not to tony, to ruby, to me, to no one.

I had no idea, my lawyers had no idea. It was a shock to tony when I called her. She didn't see me again, then dipped out & stopped working at little colorado behavioral health.

My 5 times in inpatient, long periods of homelessness, court ordered treatments (2), the numerous medications I tried from ssri, snri, tricylics, tetracylics, triptylines, 1st, 2nd, & 3rd generations of anti-psychotics & a-typical anti-psychotics, the numerous mood stabilizers, to even trying alternative treatments with cannabis & psychedelics (which actually helped more than anything else, go figure) which I stopped a long while ago because its not consistent & the help provided wasn't liked by doctors even though it helped me more than the prescriptions I took.

I have an extensive history of medications from when I was a kid, teen, young adult, & adult. I Lisa Green is the psychiatrist that said I was malingering. I had a power tripping shitwad doctor, abdallah something from change point, who barely saw me, wouldn't accept I was voluntarily inpatient like I told the people in summit regional, which they got my weight, height, eye color, hair color all wrong & said I was a danger to others. I said it loud enough to them & others around I wanted to go to inpatient because I knew something was wrong by that point & I was clearly having an episode. Nope, says them & the psychiatrist there, even with my lawyer fighting me. Hamblin, forgot the first name.

Anyways, he's the one that said as well that the judges & police couldn't charge me those misdemeanors (episode again landed me there) where I disturbed the peace & stuff like that, thanks to I went to SMI court (diagnosed severely mentally ill, been for like almost a decade) & went to trial over that. But they had me having to go all the way over there, eagar az court house, when I was in a homeless shelter (its a mission in holbrook az) thats like 3 hours away, my mother bailed me out on that one because there was literally no way to do that. Just wanted me to go to jail, be the "im tough on crime douche fuck that isn't actually removing any crime & I actively help make it worse" judge.

temu brand douche rudy loves him i guess....apa...apario...some gabagoo fuck.

i dunno. anyways.

I don't know what changed, my parents where helping me out the same way. The money in my account or directly paid for it, its not a difference. Legally even, its a civil thing where its not considered an actual earned income thanks to how its not contractually a thing & there is not expectation of it continuing. at all, they can just say no, then its a civil suit to get it, that costs more in lawyers fees than what you'll get. So no, its actually never considered real, earned income.

Which, is why I was stating also discrimination. It seems targeted. I know we had the thing with my engines, apparently the doctor decided to up & leave after tanking my ability to get ssi, then a doctor abdallah says (after never really meeting me & even the nurses hating him together with every patient in there) I'm not voluntary, as well as saying I'm borderline which means I'm all the sudden fighting all my meds (dr lisa green & him talking together she tells me in the appointments we have, which when did I sign that ROI) but the psychiatrist (dr lisa green) who primarily treats adhd (which I have) knows about paradoxical & a-typical responses to medications.

Which is why adhd meds help us adhd people.

No way that's happening with all of those other medications.

NNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!~ /s

Already diagnosed treatment resistant. I wonder if that doesn't help? Fuck wondering, I know it doesn't. Then, from there, I end up having none of that matter? The person handling where I live, amanda thomas, doesn't ask, doesn't follow up, doesn't anything & just says here I've ended your ability to live here with us because I know your parents wont cover anything anymore.

From a power tripping doctor in my inpatient, a judge that had to throw out charges because I already went through court, to a psychiatrist who admitted to talking about my medical history without an ROI with a previous doctor, & then tanked my ability to get SSI, then after emailing amanda thomas this information & the history suddenly I'm being kicked out. In a direct, but not so direct way. That's a conspiracy & discrimination from a rural town area & county. I have a great case, honestly. Too bad, they all lock down & hate medical malpractice together with vendettas making up (for whatever reason that dude has, geez, I mean I called him out for having an ego getting challenged & then on top of it showing off that even my lawyer says I'm voluntary & you could do the work from the regional medical center & how half of your staff says I'm not a danger with even the prosecution (as stated by my lawyer after the fact, over the phone, never know maybe I can get that record & or recording if there is one) saying they don't know why I didn't get court ordered treatment removed because I didn't present as that. Literally sounds like a bunch of people going after me, all having one weird reason or another to do so) the majority of reasons for why they wanted to do it.

"take him down" Is what I imagine whatever talks they had would be like that. Granted, I'm just living life & not doing anything, so i'm not sure what there is to take down. What, is it because I'm smart & handsome? White? Well spoken? Suddenly that means I can't be a person that has issues? I literally had a therapist, phone therapy, say why do you need therapy you are too smart for therapy. Thanks little colorado behavioral health!

Luckily they left them, after 2-3 sessions over the phone with me. they were, i think, my 2 or 3 therapist. I had them for a very short period of time. Are they all paranoid of me because of how smart I am, so that must mean I'm always lying? That smart & I couldn't be conning others & making money like trump? I'm willing to lie about my issues, for this long!!!!! Lisa Green, I'm not Munchausen at that point? sounds like by proxy of all the doctors & people who consistently get weirdly jealous of me & then need to say they found out the biggest liar!!! Just the largest liar there is, apparently, for decades just lying & now they are the super smart ones that found out the biggest things that are sooooo much more impressive than others.

Doctors going, "pay attention toooo meee!!!!" Munchausen by proxied person I am over here.

What is it about me that makes all of you jealous? Honestly?

They think I have an income, I don't. I must have money stored away, I don't. I have a....what a Secret identity & I'm now a billionaire that rules the world?!?!!?!?!? How are they not the paranoid schizophrenics in need of the help. Was it a stupid rumor? Did you believe something without doing the necessary work, before you acted on it? Honestly, I want to know.

I fucking do honestly believe I would have an amazing case here for discrimination & possibly intentional malpractice. Leading to lost earning from even ssi, housing that I might not have gotten, I mean I have no idea how far that really goes.

I needed to vent. Today was a shitty day. My ssi phone interview happened & I put down a wonderful (but I don't see them anymore, but they were likely the best therapist I ever saw but then apparently after going inpatient & leaving a message to have another appointment with him he decided to never call back & I took that to mean he didn't want to see me again thanks to the stigma of going inpatient) therapist I saw in the past Earnest Ford. I saw he was still practicing. He made me believe I had a shot of working my problems out & getting to be normal. I didn't have that happen, but still. *shrugs* what can you do? & the neurology department in banner health that I go to for my chronic migraines. Both brought up some triggers because when I was trying to work on myself back then I believed it could get better. It hurt a bit to do it.

Then, hey, I know that you know (ruby) I saw what was written on the paper & that you now how to pay rent & I'm looking cheeky & oooooh whaaats that?? Strange? Was a kinda fuck you to a degree. Like, dude you don't even have another case manager for me (what is it the 13th-15th in 3 years) & you acting like its such a great thing I'm getting fucked over.

I would be right there with you, if i was making money from a job & could support myself. It would be awesome to pay rent, I'd love to be normal like you. You knew & played it in that little box you stay inside of 2 times or whatever it is that its opened to the public, your patients, a week it is. You have a great time, managing almost no one because your churn rate is so high that you couldn't keep fruit flies in a way, without killing them, to match how many people "die off" out of your clinic so quickly.

Why did it make you excited & happy I was being made to pay something you then later said, and showed off, I wouldn't be able to pay? That, truthfully, the very existence of your position is barely alive thanks to the amount of your patients & clients disappearing & no longer having a place to stay. I came in and finally there are washing machines & driers for people that, most likely, had very little income to spare for going to a laundry mat including gas & the rest. People who are here because they have mental difficulties & or whatever substance abuse issues. That's cruel, dude. Why were you trying to pretend that I didn't notice?

There's no way you wouldn't have seen what was written on the paper. You went together with amanda to apartment 9, earlier today, never talked about it? I can't even directly email you about any given issues I might have, I have to go through a case manager, which don't exist for anyone right now, in training to leave after we leave, huh? CCCCHHHURRRRNNNN!!!!!

What's bad about me? honestly? Because I advocate for myself & follow through, while I still can. You look like a person that, while has a lot going on, shows that you aren't doing a great job. Why wouldn't I be able to just talk to you directly, Hannah never contacted me today, did you ever get to her like you said you would? no, maybe, yes? I don't know, a follow up would be a person who's good at their job. You didn't do that. Amanda didn't follow up.

What is earned income, that I have? honestly? what income, other than non-stable, non-real income, do I have? I would have been so happy to pay if it didn't mean the destruction of my life, possibly. So, I make you do you job? Do work? Call out when you don't? Is that why amanda isn't doing her job for almost a month? Is that why, I'm white? I mean, hate to say it, because fucking weird, but you are native/mexican. I really don't want that to be the case, because I haven't done anything but keep to myself & hike my dog. I'm every bit as deserving of the help I need as someone born of your ethnicity & I would fight for yours to get all the help they would need too. Fuck that, but if it is, thats another reason for the dei problem again.

If I, somehow (the person in a voucher program), was the person in power here, which I'm clearly not, it doesn't change its not something you use to discriminate. You go after people like trump, that's obvious. Narcissists, gabagoos, psychopaths, violent, manipulative... You go after what people are all, actually, afraid of, real predators. People who are covert too, there isn't a mental health issue, there isn't anything but a person up there conning you into thinking all the immigrants are ruining everything, that somehow there is a good reason we don't check milk now for safety, that removing privacy to those that will take advantage of us is a good thing, that people who don't take no for an answer (without obvious kink whatever shit) is a good thing & men have every right to all womens bodies, same for women doing that for men (minus the kink thing), & so on. Its not so black & white.

I mean, why wouldn't I be scared of my doctors after experiences like this. It's taught me to never trust you. Let alone my own, FUCKING GODDAMN CLINIC!!!!!

This is ridiculous, & truthfully the family that I rely on is, & continues to be, my abusers & I'm still trying to just get out they only way I can. With ssi. Now, I'm...What, supposed to crawl to them some more. Supposed to go live out my vehicle again? Go find another shelter?

I didn't do anything wrong, not once, didn't even gain more income. It...it was a shitty day, & that held back glee was painful, Ruby. Amanda didn't even have the gumption to face me, or email me to make sure I understood why. I did the work I needed to, to make sure I rescheduled my appointment with my doctor for friday, which you understood was the case, but then asked me, right before my phone call was scheduled for ssi if I could come in. You know it was rescheduled for that, the ssi phone interview. It could have been subtle, hey make sure to have your phone ready, to just thinking I should go over there & have that gone over, to it slipped your mind while you told me that it was rescheduled for friday for that reason.

Amendment!!! you said it was just a resigning, basically. I got suspicious of it immediately hearing that word & you tried to reassure me with a lie saying it wasn't changing, the rent. So i would come in & sign it, looking happy & excited. There is no way you didn't know, then you glared your eyes when I told you that I didn't think any of my income was earned income & my parents said in an email to amanda that they would stop supporting me. I still remember that move, the, "ha he caught me I'll have to argue this" glare & that doesn't make sense. What did amanda say to you, that she clearly had you thinking something while then knowing immediately she did that because you know me & know I don't have any jobs & chores are certainly not considered earned income when they keep the money to pay for something directly.

Then you gave me the standard, well you'll just have to take it and deal with it shrug because I know what's going on, after giving me her phone number & looked like thats as much as you can affect me & I won't have to deal with whatever the consequences of this are because I'm pretty sure its going to be bad for you.

I know that shrug. You wanted me to not believe I can get lawyers & more involved. This will, & can affect you, tremendously. Even HOM, I decided to not pursue the history here of discrimination that would be an easy case to win, having to move my engines. Maintenance dude, jason, retired or left after that because of how shitty it was you did it, after you said it was fine to have those engines there, ruby.

It would have been a huge amount of legal fees that would have destroyed the entire program that makes it so you have a job, ruby. I told my previous case manger as much, too. It would have ended the clinic, ruby. Tony & all the patients in springerville, az would have not had any help & I would have won that case. Peter in apartment 5 still keeps his rugs & more out there & I'm not allowed to have anything out in front of my apartment. Rules for me, but not for others is discrimination. That is a clear example of it. I would easily win this case, with any lawyer, practically. HOM, knows this, ruby & amanda. I hold your whole lives in my hands.

You shouldn't shrug like that, you need to respect me.