Helloxhestia​:

Severus made his way to the infirmary at a brisk stride, Selwyn’s blood soaking through his robes and arms by the time he stepped into the room. The battle was not what any of them had expected, and the trickle of suspicion he’d felt prior to being dispatched was regrettably well placed.

Severus weaved his way through the chaos of the infirmary after a mission and found the empty cot, where he placed Selwyn carefully and cast a spell to check her vitals.

Rosier cursed. Severus looked up — and his eyes snagged on a flash of bright red hair. His breath hitched like he was punched in the throat. ‘ Yes, ’ he said quickly, and rattled off Selwyn’s vitals and the injuries she’d sustained in the battlefield that he knew of, making his way over to the other cot. ‘ What happened to her?! ’ He barked, standing over Lily’s cot. There was a peculiar clarity amidst the panic. It was him, and Rosier, and Lily, and the cold claw of fear that sunk itself down his spine and spread through him. Everything else dissolved into white noise.

Evan & @wrongdeor (@asphodelroot & @theoselwyn referenced) June 24, 1984 - Infirmary roughly a minute and a half after Theo got brought in

Evan could handle chaos. It was part of his day job so handling injuries after the mission shouldn’t have felt nearly as exhausting as it did. Not even two full teams back and he was already dealing with one person in critical condition and the rest of the team having come back concussed or worst. He would owe a thank you to Emmeline later since she was doing a phenomenal job at going back and forth between people. She had better bedside manner than his own but he had the excuse of worrying about multiple people if it came to someone complaining to Hestia or Alastor. At the end of the day, he cared about no one dying more than being viewed as the friendly healer putting up with being sworn at, screamed at, or both.

He had been about to take a seat and catch his breath for a moment when Severus came in with someone, merely earning an arched brow and a groan before he shifted his attention from Lily to the two.

“Status update?” He asked, expression faltering upon realizing who the person Severus had laid out on the one empty cot was. “Fucking hell, shit-” Evan snapped his mouth shut to avoid saying anything more unintelligible than that, pinching the bridge of his nose before he spoke again. “Theodosia. We- Can I switch with you? I’ve got Lily and will update you once you update me.”

Severus stayed in their little out of the way table for twenty minutes after Lily gathered her worry-fueled determination about her like the hems of a too long dress and set out anew to find Lupin. They didn’t envy the werewolf, who was unlikely to find anywhere clever enough to hide from Lily, but if he was going to indulge in self destruction then Lily was free to indulge in her excessive mothering. Severus kept an eye and an ear out, just to see how that went. Indulgent, themself, in their own hobby : people-watching. They liked to see how things went with people, once they picked up on a thread. 

Soon enough they were bored with their seat and changed vantage points, picking up their near-empty butterbeer and moving to the bar, where they could see the other side of the club more easily. It was the same glass they had all night. ( Severus didn’t get drunk in public — alone in their room? Very much. Too often. Especially while working on a difficult project. But not in public. That would be embarrassing — dangerous, too. But mostly embarrassing. ).

A glass of Whiskey slid down the bar towards them. ‘ How terrible of me to forget my manners, ’ Severus rolled their eyes, but picked up the offered drink. ‘ And with such respectable company at that. ’  The din of noise and chaos rose around them at just that moment before dying down quickly. This was more of a post-Quidditch House party than anything else. 

They’d meant to reach out to Longbottom — just to test the waters. Just to see in what direction her thoughts and inclinations leaned. It was interesting to see her reach out to Severus first, but not, from what they observed, completely unexpected. They looked at her, eyebrow raised, made a quick pass over the surface of her thoughts. Intentions rippled slowly from underneath. ‘ I’ll take the company and the drink, ’ they said with a nod, ‘ but keep in mind I’m not as easily entertained as Lupin. ’ 

Whiskey with Notes of Ulterior Motive

LOCATION: The Flaming Dragon DATE: June 12, 1984 @wrongdeor

Alice shook her stinging hand out, pleased and pleasantly tired in that slightly-battered way that followed a game of Quodcup, and leaned back against the bar to finish catching her breath. Not that she was some old-fart like Moody who needed to catch her breath after a rousing game or anything, of course not. But it was a nice excuse to relax and take a breath.

She took a sip of the rich Cinnamon Crackle Whiskey she’d ordered as a rich, mellow break from the brighter, more interesting drinks she’d been imbibing so far tonight, distractedly savoring the way the sparking crackles snapped against her lips before dissolving into the almost honey-like liquid that trickled down her throat like a balm.

Then she paused so abruptly that she almost choked, swallowed before she actually did choke, and beckoned urgently to the bartender for a second beverage. Waiting for its arrival was torture that had her bouncing on her stool. The glass had barely brushed her fingers when pushed off the bar with sudden, impatient purpose. The grin that had flickered across her face at the sight of her target flickered away again almost as quickly in favor of determination. The rest of the bar fell away (not completely; Alice wasn’t an idiot, which meant she knew that if she ever let herself close-focus so hard that she forgot to pay attention to the world around her in a place where Alastor Moody could see her, she would regret it) and she walked through the cluster of her allies on autopilot, heading for someone who had joined those ranks only a few months ago and whom Alice hadn’t made an effort to seek out more than in passing yet.

But that had been before she’d realized the true value Severus Snape brought to the Order of the Phoenix. It wasn’t what he knew about the Death Eaters, so much of which he couldn’t explicitly share with the rest of them – whether because of compulsion spells Voldemort placed on his followers or admonishments from Dumbledore not to spread his secrets too widely Alice neither knew nor cared. It was because he knew of what they knew: the Dark Magic they used to such devastating extent against the Order. And not just the sort of Dark Magic that one could learn from books, no. She had learned that Severus was one of those rare wix with the gift for true creativity.

Alice slid into the empty chair next to Severus and pushed the second glass of whiskey towards him with her fingertips like it was a sort of offering. “Bad form to drink alone at a party,” she said lightly. “So I brought you a drink and company with which to quaff it.” She offered a smile – warm, but thin; she didn’t want to come on too strong and put his hackles up. (Not that she was sure she’d ever seen him with his hackles down anywhere among the Order.) “You can decline either or both, of course,” she added in a dry deadpan, “but know that if you do so you’ll be shattering my heart irreparably.”

@asphodelroot

Early January, 1984. Spinner’s End.

The air was damp with the January rain, pouring over the streets of Cokeworth in relentless sheets. The windows of the old house were shut and sealed, the four walls wrapped in wards and heating spells. Brick and mortar didn’t hold magic the way old stone or pine wood did, and so the cold seeped through the cracks as it pleased, slow and unbothered.

When Severus claimed this house after his father’s passing, he’d done so with a bitter heart. He resented needing anything from his father, in life or in death, but by then he was tired of the bare room above the apothecary and had grown wise to the need for distance, for a space beyond the prying eyes of his Master. Thus it came to be that only three years after his dignified march out of Spinner’s End, bursting with pride and purpose, Severus found himself slipping back into his old home, silent as shame, even as the only witness to this humiliation was himself.

And now Lily, too. Who once was witness to all that Severus is and was and could be, thus it seemed fitting that she’d reclaim that role upon re-entering his life.

He set the pot of lentil soup upon the wooden coffee table, along the plate of cut bread, and poured a bowl for himself and another for Lily. They’d spent all morning and afternoon in the library beneath the house, pouring over books and spells as the row of cauldrons sizzled and rolled over a low fire. The scent of hellebore and rosemary drifted up to the living room. The fire crackled on in the quiet room.

He sat on the couch beside her and brought his knees up to his chest. He shook pepper onto his bowl and then lifted the shaker to his friend. ‘ Pepper? Or salt? ’

So did I, Severus thought but didn’t say aloud. They had a busy schedule. They kept up with many duties at once. When the werewolf invited them for coffee they dismissed the idea out of hand, but as they found themself free this afternoon (what a coincidence! How often did a hole in their schedule appear unannounced?) they threw on an old pair of jeans and a shirt, their feet taking them down familiar London streets before they fully realized what they were doing. Or rather, why they were doing it.

The last time they properly set foot in the muggle world was so long ago Severus couldn’t place it accurately. Despite this, they merged into the comfortable flow of foot traffic as seamlessly as they would if they’ve never left. The difference between London’s streets and the silent, furtive shuffle of Diagon’s was unsubtle. It was like the war had disappeared behind them, as real as a troubling dream upon waking. Severus disliked spending more time here than they absolutely had to. Juxtaposed with this comfortable illusion of safety, the reality of their everyday life reimposed itself tenfold.

He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jacket. Dropped his gaze to the table instinctively, then looked at the werewolf, at the hand gesture. Fine, he thought, dragging the metal chair back to take a seat. Fine, then he motioned for the waiter to get him his own coffee (black, no milk, no sugar) and sat down.

He crossed his legs at the knees. Leaned back, elbow resting over the back of the metal chair. He fought the urge to fiddle with his silver earring. ‘ I almost decided this was a joke, ’ he said, the corner of his lips lifted in a smirk. ‘ One last cheap shot for old times’ sake. I haven’t ruled that out yet, just so you know. ’ He watched the werewolf silently, hand close to his wand. Waiting. Wary, but an ever-present anger moving beneath the surface. ‘ What’s this about? ’

WHEN: sometime shortly after Severus joined the order WHERE: muggle coffee shop CLOSED for @wrongdeor

Remus Lupin is not a man of many regrets. In fact, blinding Gryffindor as he is, he’d rather puff out his chest and act like a massive dick, saying he’s never done any wrong, rather than admit to some things he’d like to change in his past. But there are things. Pride sits high up in his chest and refuses to let the words form on his tongue on most days, but he has things to apologise for. In particular, the one time he was, in fact, a monster.

He’s never been proud of hurting people; every time he’s lashed out at his friends through the years, every time the full moon has made its home amongst the stars and some greater evil within him has tried its best to tear apart his friendships, he always crawls back and begs for forgiveness the morning after. He’s not a monster, he doesn’t want to be. Except the one time he is, the one time he’s done one of the worst things he could do, he hides behind his friends and doesn’t think about it ever again. There are layers upon layers of denial that sit atop of whatever foggy memory he has of the prank. He felt used by his friend, like a killing machine upon a leash; he felt inhuman for the first time in years; he was a monster who had nearly killed someone. It was easier to push all of it away, deal with none of it, and act like it didn’t happen.

It felt like that, until Severus joined the Order. Seeing them more often made the lump in Remus’ throat grow, the guilt and the resentment flooding up his brain until it was a headache he couldn’t get rid of, an ever present ache he was fighting against. He isn’t a man of many regrets, yes, but he’s not going to walk around like a coward, barely able to meet Severus’ eyes. So he sets up a meeting.

“I thought you weren’t gonna show up.” He greets, when Severus finally arrives. There’s a scone forgotten on his plate and a half-empty cup of some overpriced cappuccino concoction in front of him. He blinks up at the other, almost as if dumbfounded by their presence, before he gestures to the seat across from him. “Please." 

@perniciouspotter​

Flashback. February 1984.

Severus rapped brisk and loud knuckles against the wooden door. In the last few years following graduation he’d expected to run into Potter again — neither of them made their allegiance a secret, especially not from each other. And they, sworn enemies from the moment they met to the very end, were set on a collision course and picking up speed. How could Severus not anticipate a crossing of paths?

Current circumstances were laughably different from what he’d anticipated before. Instead of the violent encounter he was itching to have, a clock ticking downwards in his mind counting towards this meeting, Severus shifted a bag of healing brews against his shoulder. Waiting almost politely at his enemy’s front door to be let in. With every intention to do the opposite of causing harm.

He nodded in greeting as the door clicked open. ‘ Potter, ’ he said in the least hostile tone he used since he was 11. ‘ You were informed of the reason for my visit? ’ Of course he was. It would be rather difficult if he wasn’t. But Severus had run the meeting in his mind several times over and this was the best he could come up with.

The crack of apparition didn’t come. The seconds marched on: 9, 8, 7 —- Severus turned towards his field partner. Moody was covered in blood and slinging hexes at the enemy, with no signs of slowing down or getting the fuck out of here like he was supposed to — was he delirious? Did he hear a word Severus said? — 4, 3, 2 —-

The translucent dome shivered against the night sky. Severus clapped a hand over Moody’s shoulder, and apparated to the first place he could think of.

The damp air of the forest slid away, a shift of colors and sound. In a blink, they were in the still and dry air of Spinner’s End, where the wards were thick and hostile and the smell of dry wood and hellebore filled their lungs. The fireplace crackled on beneath the sudden silence, unstartled.

Of course, Severus thought with deep bitterness. Of all the places that could spring to mind in a moment of danger it was this. Home.

Still. He supposed it was lucky they sprang into the living room rather than the single bedroom upstairs where he hid when he was little. This was uncomfortable enough as it was. ‘ Don’t get comfortable, ’ he barked at his companion, ‘ We’re leaving. ’ He began his march towards the entrance hall, where the wards wouldn’t rip Moody’s flesh from his bones upon apparating out for daring to intrude. Severus had no intention of performing another Side-Along again, he was rather annoyed with Moody for not apparating out himself the moment he was told to.

wrongdeor​:

The trip through the private woods was long and tedious, and completely avoidable had Severus been able to replenish his supply of portkeys in time. He was not very athletic — or at all, really — and felt every unnecessary step they took down the woods with deep frustration and exhaustion. Neither of which he showed to his partner, whom he was sure kept one eye on the enemy and one on Severus himself. This mission was a test, and everything he did was, as always, under scrutiny.

A twig snapped. Severus swiveled around on high alert towards the source of the noise, wand at the ready — the weight of hands on his back and shoulder, a twist of fabric — The ground was swept from beneath his feet. Severus blinked. He only had time to be confused before he slammed against the ground a few yards away with a heavy THUD.

He got back up on his feet cursing and huffing and considerably more annoyed than he was only a moment ago. ‘ Fuck off! You bloody brick! ’ He shouted back at the buffoon that threw him across the fucking field, but he was half turned towards the broken arch, wand in motion, spells at the ready. Wards meant to keep people in were only a hair’s breadth away from keeping people out. Severus reached into the edge, plucked its strings, and cast a spell, the incantation rolling off his tongue like water. A long string of latin whispered in gentle, coaxing tones, and the edge of the safety clearing shimmered and expanded it’s scope until it covered both himself and the Auror a few yards behind. It would keep their enemies outside of the dome. But more importantly, Severus and Moody can apparate out.

‘ NOW, ’ shouted Severus over his shoulder. ‘ We have thirteen seconds! ’ Moody had to apparate first, if Severus left the spell would break and the safety border would snap right back into shape.

@wrongdeor​

Alastor probably should have been concerned about how easily Severus was thrown halfway across the field. At the back of his mind, perhaps he was. The forefront, however, was focused on the shadowed figures of who he figured were Goyle and a handful of his cronies coming to see them off. Such sweethearts, they were. 

He waited a few beats, listening for Severus, before laughing to himself. A bloody brick, indeed. He had been a beater, after all. It was rather similar, wasn’t it?, protecting your partner from an attack just as you would a teammate? Alastor took a strategic step backward, dodging another hex before tossing off a rather peevish Confrigo, hoping that it stuck and tossed bits of Goyle to Morgana’s tits and back. He continued to toss off attack after attack, keeping the Death Eaters at bay. 

Behind him, he could hear Severus muttering, working to undo the wards long enough to, hopefully, get them out sooner rather than later. He was bloody good at it, Alastor knew, which was why Snape had been brought with him. That, and it was a test, but the former was far more important now.

Snape’s shouted command, the detail of thirteen seconds, and Moody’s distinct knowledge that he was the one who needed to apparate first caused him to back almost completely toward his field partner. It also caused, for a split second, the shields to slip. In that moment, a curse ricocheted through, slamming half into Alastor’s chest and the forearms he’d raised in preparation. 

Stumbling backward with a grunt, Moody caught himself and threw a stupefy and a finger-removal hex one after the other, snarling against the burning wounds, blood dripping down his arms and his chest. 

my father had the kind of anger all fathers do. it lingers your whole life

the unabridged journals of sylvia plath // audre lorde // sense8 “i can’t leave her” // halsey, i would leave me if i could // @ijaazat // fantastic bastards, death spells // catherine lacey

HEADCANON: OCCUPATION (Researcher at St. Mungos)

Severus was initially an intern at St. Mungos research division during the last year of his potions apprenticeship. He wrote (and later published) multiple case studies regarding permanent curse damage and did assistant work for a senior researcher’s project during that time. After receiving his potions mastery Severus was officially hired as a junior researcher for the hospital. He’s currently involved in two separate projects both of which are within the field of permanent dark curses.

During the years following his graduation and before his employment at Mungos, Severus worked shifts at an apothecary, and sold potions as a freelance potioneer. He still takes commissions from regulars but they’re less frequent than they used to be.

madeyed-andmoody:

The spelled and warded doors were a habit at this point. They didn’t need anyone not privy to this sensitive information overhearing anything. Not that people in the Order wouldn’t be told. Of course they would, but it was a delicate situation, and a precarious balance, and Moody oftentimes hated it.

Alastor valued Severus’s bluntness, but now it felt like a suckered punch to the gut. They had not accounted for this, not truly. She was the Lieutenant. He straightened fully, back like an arrow, muscles coiled, eyes focused on their face, searching for any indication there was doubt. When Moody didn’t find it, he cursed aloud, running a across his mouth, teeth grit.

When Severus continued with the Lestranges, more explotives, this time far more colorful and vulgar (often about their mothers and the devil’s cunt they sprung from) than the last followed. Alastor knew who Severus was talking about, and he nodded, already casting a patronus charm and sending a message off to Hestia, asking her to come immediately, that they had new information, that teams needed to be altered.

They would figure this out. They would not sent their people to slaughter. Those children would survive, even if Alastor himself had to go down there and stick Black’s head on a bloody pike himself.

helloxhestia​: ​

Hestia was happy to finally be getting into work today. She’d been trying to for the past four days to find a little time in the office, but even thought it was the day before their next major mission, she figured it wouldn’t hurt to head in, double check her files, and then head back for any finalizing that needed to get done.

Just as she was about to head out the door, a silvery wisp flew in through her window. Moody’s eagle.

The eagle spoke with Moody’s voice and told her she needed to get there immediately. They needed to adjust teams. The day before.

Hestia immediately apparated to the closest location she was able, then stalked into the meeting room, swinging open the doors. 

She was about to acknowledge Moody, when she realized Severus was there as well. Before she could stop herself, she let out an audible groan, knowing exactly what his presence met. She addressed Severus directly.

“What did you hear?”

Severus stared back at Moody’s shocked face, grim but unmoved. The older man cursed creatively, and Severus waited out the initial reaction — it was not unexpected nor undeserved. 

Severus’ mind ran a mile a minute. Bellatrix was the Lieutenant, not some freshly inducted foot soldier on their trial run out to kill a few muggles to get their feet wet. Her involvement plucked a thread of suspicion in Severus’ mind, an unnamed, vague unease, like they were missing something vital that they really shouldn’t. Did Bellatrix volunteer for this mission of her own accord? It didn’t seem unlikely. This was just the thing she’d do on her day off, anyway.

The doors swung open and Hestia stalked inside. Severus lifted an eyebrow at her greeting, but didn’t waste time. ‘ Bellatrix Lestrange and the brothers will be at Liverpool, ’ they said. ‘ I don’t believe the Liverpool team is prepared to face them on their own. ’ They inclined their head towards Moody. ‘ He agrees. ’ Severus wasn’t sure any of their 3-a-piece teams were equipped to deal with the Lestranges on such short notice. Which was what prompted their following suggestion. ‘ Send me to Liverpool. Whatever team we decide on I should be on it. ’

@helloxhestia​ @madeyed-andmoody​

Severus flinched at the flagrant use of the Dark Lord’s name from little old Potter, no less — who do you think you are?! An old thought that sprang to the top of his mind every time he had the opportunity to be in the arrogant boy’s presence for more than a moment, and thus all the more easily dismissed for it’s recurrence. Potter held himself above the rest, as always, but from the way he carried himself it seemed to Severus he was merely keeping his head above water.

Severus tipped his chin up as he followed Potter to the living room. Shoulders squared and back straight. ‘ Equality is unattainable in the wizarding world. The Dark Lord provides opportunity, which is more than what the Order could say for itself. ’ Severus was a practical man and he took the practical path — in most things. It all fell through in the end for him but being a Death Eater was, and still is, the practical choice.

Severus watched Potter move like every shift pained him. He took mental notes of his observations. He was silent for a long moment after the question was posed, before he sat down on the armchair besides Potter, legs crossed at the knee, and set his bag of brews by his feet. ‘ The process will be a month long, at least, ’ he started. ‘ I’ll administer a potion and spell three times a week. 12 to 24 sessions in total — after that, everything that could be fixed has been fixed. ’ He tilted his head to the side slightly. ‘ Once we begin there can be no delays or breaks. This is a delicate process. The margin for error is very slim. ’

wrongdeor​:

Severus didn’t miss the near slip-up, but far from surprised he was bracing for it. He was ready for this to be the most unpleasant encounter Potter could make, and from experience that was a rather tall order but entirely achievable for the twat he knew — what was unexpected instead was the correction. Severus, graciously, pretended not to notice. ‘ Potter, ’ he said in a clipped tone. He nodded in return. 

He stepped inside, paused in the entrance hall and turned to look at his enemy patient. With a slanted brow, Severus said, ‘ Surprised? War makes for strange bedfellows, Potter. A halfblood with a muggle name would have more to lose and to gain in this war than a pureblood boy with a trust fund. And what I want hardly overlaps with what I need to do. ’ He jerked his chin towards the injured wrist. ‘ You need that hand to fight, and we need you on the field. Ergo, here I am. ’ He lifted a shoulder, the bag shifting with the movement, vials jostling beneath the fabric. He didn’t respond to whether or not he can cure him. That remained to be seen.

Severus looked at the wizard for a moment. Head tilted slightly to the side. ‘ And I never liked unequal fights, if you recall. ’ That was you, Potter. He nodded down the hall, towards what he believed was the living room. ‘ Lead the way. ’

.

The second Severus opened his mouth, James felt like breaking. That had happened a lot since he’d gotten out of the dungeons and Lily had left him. Little things would make him want to throw something or sob or a mixture of both - like seeing the mug she used to use in his cupboards or watching Garnet snub him as though the cat never even realized he’d been gone. Or, like the other day, when Remus had been visiting him at Mungo’s and said Lily’s name and James had told him to watch his damn mouth as though he’d been called something crude.

But all Severus needed to do was talk in that slow, annoying drawl of his and remind James of all the reasons Lily had broken up with him without even doing it on purpose. Or, knowing Snape, maybe it was on purpose and the wix was just so fucking smart that it hardly sounded that way. “Convenient timing to realize that about yourself,” James said with a new dullness to his voice that hadn’t been there before. His head suddenly felt stuffy like he was holding back tears, but he just ground down his back teeth until it went away. Maybe later he’d curl up with Sirius and let himself cry again, but there was no fucking way Severus Snape would see how much this - Lily, Severus, their friendship, everything - was affecting him.

“Voldemort promotes equality in your little circle of friends?” James quipped back with his eyebrows raised, a mean smirk on his face, using the name intentionally to try and get a rise. He turned and led the way to his living room where a plush maroon couch and two armchairs sat around a coffee table. There was a multi-patterned blanket on the back of one of the chairs. It felt warm in here, despite James’ lack of it.

He gingerly sat on the couch, perching himself forward because leaning back would’ve caused his joints to ache and pain to hiss from between his teeth. Gently, he lowered his wrist to rest against his knee. “So, what kind of process are we lookin’ at?” Severus could kill him, if he wanted to. It would be easy. James would do whatever he was told and, if he were about to be poisoned, he’d have no clue until it happened.