my dad asked me today "how do you still watch music videos" i laughed in his face
tw // gr00ming, hypersexualization, long-ish vent
i fucking hate the thought of being intimate with someone. being groomed literally ruined that for me but at the same time im so hypersexual i feel so disgusting. im so gross. yes i know what happened to me wasnt my fault (even tho i still think it was). some days im so udderly sex replused then some days im so hypersexual its all i can think about. the thought of someone seeing me in a sexual way makes me feel so fucking disgusting and uncomfortable but then again it feels like thats the only way i can get attention. because im not attractive like other girls i need to sell myself to men to get any form of attention and its fucking disgusting i hate myself and cant stand the feeling for being looked at. i wish i could talk about this in therapy but my mom cant know about it, she would say its my fault and that im disgusting. even after i told my friends about it and they said they dont see me any differently i cant help but think theyre lying. im gross arent i. sending gross pics to a man on reddit because its the only way i felt pretty and loved. a grown man at that who probably has those pictures saved and they're probably on some fucking p0rn site. god thinking about it makes me wanna throw up
i love you green. i love you forests. i love you smell of damp earth. i love you feeling before the storm breaks. i love you moss. i love you rivers. i love you streams. i love you thunderstorms. i love you sunlight shining through leaves.
i relate to so many of these...i would love to be a mom but theres so many reasons that i cant
- each good enough on their own, if you ever feel like articulating why you’re child-free (non-exhaustive list).
Because you don’t want children;
Because you don’t like children;
Because they are not suited to your temperament;
Because you don’t want to be benevolent, patient, kind and didactic;
Because they are too time-consuming;
Because they are too expensive;
Because you don’t think you have the right kind of voice for bed-time stories; or the will to tell them;
Because they are too noisy;
Because you love quiet and peace over everything else;
Because you want to be able to wake up when you want and not when they wake you up; because it would be detrimental to your sleeping-in;
Because it would be detrimental to your hobbies;
Because your living space is too small and you don’t want to change it;
Because cats are enough;
Because it would be a threat to your health;
Because you don’t want to pass down your genes;
Because you don’t want that kind of ‘immortality’;
Because you don’t want to go through nine months of pregnancy;
Because the thought of having a child grow inside you gives you the creeps;
Because you don’t want to go through the pains of childbirth;
Because you don’t trust the medical system to have your best interests at heart;
Because it would be detrimental to your career;
Because you don’t want to slave away at a job you hate to earn enough money to raise them;
Because you don’t want to have to worry about having enough money to raise them;
Because you don’t want the hassle of trying to ‘have-it-all’;
Because it’s a huge responsibility;
Because children deserve more than what you’re willing to give;
Because the world is a misogynistic place; because the world is a homophobic place; because the world is a racist place;
Because you would never have a good night of sleep ever again;
Because you would worry all your life about them and their well-being;
Because the world (and men) hates everything that is different;
Because you can’t guarantee they’ll be in good health;
Because you cannot protect your children from everything;
Because at some point they’ll be hurt and there’s nothing you can do about it;
Because you don’t know what today will be made of; because the world might be a bleak place in twenty, in thirty years; and what life a child would have then?
Because who are you to inflict life on a child?
Because you think less people on the planet can’t hurt the climate;
Because you don’t have the community to support you through it;
Because your mother’s wishes are not your own;
Because no-one is entitled to children or grandchildren;
Because your being fine acting as a doting aunt doesn’t bind you to anything more;
Because it’s hard to do alone and the last thing you want is to rely on a man;
Because children are often used by men against their mothers to trap them into abuse;
Because you don’t want to do what is expected of you—be a silent and meek housewife;
Because you hate the stereotypes attached to motherhood; because you don’t want them to be attached to you; because you know you don’t need to have children to change people’s opinions on motherhood;
Because you don’t want to be forever tied to a man;
Because you don’t fancy yourself into a supportive role for the rest of your life;
Because you can’t guarantee you’ll love them;
Because you can’t guarantee you won’t hate them;
Because you don’t know how to raise them; because you don’t think you can find a way to raise them and have them turn out right;
Because you don’t want to birth more misogynists—the world already has enough;
Because being a mother is not inevitable;
Because you’re not suited to motherhood;
Because being a woman doesn’t mean that you’ll be a mother one day;
Because you’re a lesbian; because this obsession with children is very heterosexual-centred and couldn’t be further from your priorities;
Because you want to be independent;
Because you want to live alone;
Because you want to achieve your dreams;
Because you’re busy with you own life;
Because you don’t want to make that kind of commitment—now, or ever;
Because you’re selfish*;
Because your life is valuable on its own; because you don’t need to have children for your life to hold worth;
And finally, because no man is entitled to your body, because you don’t have to justify to them your own decisions, feel free to use this one liberally:
It’s none of your business.
*That’s not a bad thing. You’re entitled to a life of your own, you’re not here to serve everyone else.
hi hi omg hiii :3 omg hi hi hi omg hi :3 hi omg hi hiiiiii BITES YOU AND SHAKES YOU HARD hi hi omg hiiiii :3
I believe Lucifer has a anonymous Reddit and posts things sometimes here’s a few examples:
r/AITA
r/trueoffmychest
r/ask
Should I make more for the other brothers and maybe dateables?
my comfort movie is girl interrupted (i sob violently everytime i watch it but it makes me feel seen)