Courier: Say Vulpes, I Hear You Like ‘em Young

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Nick: (Pacing around the office, recounting several stories about reckless and stupid things Jasmine has done recently)

Ellie Perkins: (Drinking some coffee, nodding along while thinking that the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree in this case)

Nick: “That’s not even the end of it! I warned that girl about going into the Milton Parking Garage because of the loose whack job who turned the place into a death trap but the more I talked about it the more she seemed to want to go in to catch this guy!”

Ellie Perkins: “Ya don’t say?” (Under her breath to herself) “Sounds pretty familiar….”

Nick: (Holds up a finger) “I turn my back for one second to talk with Preston and the next thing ya know X6 is behind me saying that my kid has just done the one thing I told her not to do and had decide to walk into the deathtrap because she wanted to “investigate” this so called maze!”

Ellie Perkins: (Overly dramatic gasp) “No- really?! Even though it was obviously a trap that had been set up and would most likely lead to her untimely death?!?”

Nick: (Doesn’t catch the biting sarcasm) “Yes! It was a trap laid out clear as day and the kid just moseyed on in there like she owned the place!”

Ellie Perkins: “Mhhhhhmmm!!! Is that so???” (Aggressively sips her coffee)

Nick: (Pinches the bridge of his nose) “I had to kick down the front door and drag Jazzy out by the heels because she wouldn’t come back! And the kid had the audacity to try and wave it off like she didn’t just give us all a heart attack in fear for her life!”

Ellie Perkins: “MHHHHHHMMMNNNN!” (Sips her coffee even more aggressively, almost breaking the handle with her grip)

Nick: (Shakes his head in exasperation) “The kid ain’t invincible and easily mendable no matter how big she talks herself up. One of these days her reckless behavior is gonna catch up to her- and that won’t be a pretty sight!”

Ellie Perkins: (Finally has her big moment after years of built up) “You feel like saying, “You keep laughing in deaths face, one day it’s going to laugh back,” to her to try and knock some sense into her stubborn little head?”

Nick: “YES! Exactly what I-!” (Realizes what she means by referring to that certain phrase and freezes)

Ellie Perkins: (Keeps going to drive in the point) “And it just annoys you to a deeper level whenever she does that confident little smirk juuuuust before she’s about to do something so stupidly reckless-…”

Nick: (Holds up a hand) “Alright, I see your point there, Ellie. I suppose I’m not the one who should be taking here….”

Ellie Perkins: (Grins smugly at him, folding her arms)

Nick: (Heavy sigh) “Yeah, yeah- get it all out of your system why doncha.” (Kicks his feet up on his desk, bracing for impact as he lights a cigarette)

Ellie Perkins: (Slams her hands down on the desk, almost quivering with anticipation) “I’ve been waiting a long damn time for this day to come, Valentine….”

(R.I.P Nicholas Valentine. He’s never hearing the end of this one from Ellie and he’s in for a long lecture)

Pokemon illustrations by フキダシコットン on X

fucked up that Arcade Gannon's VA endorsed trump

A good movie will let you suspend disbelief for the duration.   A bad one makes you angry that they think you are that stupid.

Redditor Soddington. (via wilwheaton)

roaches arent the only fuckers that get to mutate!

what a hidden reply

I’ve been playing Hitman III for the past few weeks, but this conversation with a random lady, who has no connection whatsoever with the targets or their organizations, was the most outstanding part of the story mode for me.

The official Twitter uploaded this Tinkaton animation!

RIP, that Corviknight 😂