i am never going to emotionally recover from this.
this is so canon, i would know
Mabel and Bill were sitting on the couch when Soos passed from the gift shop through the living room. As Soos passed, Bill was saying, "No, I just don't see relationships as eternal. Romance is a short term commitment. Like a fashion trend, or, or—"
"Like gum?"
Bill snapped his fingers. "Yes! Exactly like gum!"
As he headed upstairs, Soos heard Mabel say, "So when a romance starts to lose its flavor, you just—" and Bill cut in, "You spit it on the sidewalk, grind it under your heel, and float away without looking back, never thinking about it again..."
A few minutes later, after changing out of his Mr. Mystery suit into a more comfortable question mark t-shirt, Soos headed back downstairs. Bill was still talking: "... and all you get out of it is sickly sweet spit, you're just—swallowing all this sweet spit until it makes your mouth sour and it's dripping out around your eye, and it makes you hungrier than if you'd never eaten at all, and all your friends say 'oh Bill, you're always griping about your gum, why don't you settle down to eat a proper meal,' and you say 'how about you mind your own business, Kryptos, I don't lecture you about your diet,' and then your other friends accuse you of choosing inedible snacks so you don't have to commit to swallowing them, because they don't get that you're a flawless energy being, you don't need 'nutrition' or 'sustenance,' this is just a hobby to you—and then you just, you get sick of the taste of gum altogether, you never want to chew gum again as long as you live, it's always so needy and your jaw hurts, and it's your fault if you can't focus on chewing the stupid thing all day every day, like maybe you have a life of your own, did anyone consider that? So you burn down a gum factory so you don't have to look at their stupid ads! And then an eon later you find yourself craving a stick of gum, so you find a different brand and cram a new one in."
Mabel, who'd been listening to Bill's monologue in wide-eyed stunned silence, finally smiled in relief as he landed on a familiar sentiment. She pumped her fist in the air. "Yeah! Cram a new one in!"
"You get me, kid."
I think there might be something wrong with Bill.
. . .
Sometimes.....you just have to learn to say No...
You too Kryptos..
(cartoonish blood warning)
My son, I found him in a trashcan.
My artstyle is so inconsistent its not even funny anymore(also this is an artstyle test and i like the results)
say his name three times!
developing an au! not much is different other than what’s said but yayyy - calling this the Nightmares Au for now
comm info under the cut!
Cult of the…. triangle?? Hmmm…Somethings not right here.
When I say Bill can't remember Dipper's name, this is in the outline for a future chapter:
HEY UH uh uhhh uhhhhhhh MABEL'S BROTHER? NAME?? What's his name, it's the same length as Mabel's and it starts with the same letters, MARIO? MATTY? MAGNI? MABON? Isn't it Mabon? That sounds right, he's sure it was Mabon. IT'S REALLY PETTY OF YOU TO IGNORE BILL UNTIL HE GETS YOUR NAME RIGHT, MABON. No wait he went by a nickname, what was his nickname. It was a constellation. ORION? No. TRIANGULUM? Bill would remember if it was Triangulum. What's his sign, VIRGO?? CMON KID
[a worrying amount of time later:]
Meanwhile bill in the bathroom is doodling his zodiac on the mirror in toothpaste and going symbol by symbol "okay that one's Wendy, that's Gideon, that's Mabel— PINE TREE!" smacks the sink triumphantly. "YOUR NAME'S PINE TREE! STOP IGNORING ME, WHERE ARE YOU! ... maybe he IS out."
He forgets Dipper's name so hard that when Dipper stops wearing his cap Bill doesn't even remember which zodiac symbol he is
"𝒜𝓁𝓁 𝒽𝒶𝒾𝓁 𝒢𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒶𝓰𝒽ℯ𝓇" we all say in unison RIP Misha and Gallagher - May 8, 2024. "To the imperfect tomorrow."
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